Disclaimer: Characters belong to Shonda Rhimes and Grey's anatomy.

A/ N: Whenever possible, I try to respond to each comment individually. But I want to thank here, the guests and their friendly comments and all those who read (you are apparently a lot) and who don't like review. I'm glad you liked this story. We have no idea about that, when we start writing. And it's so good, when that goes this way...

Chapter 12: "As long as the heart keeps memories, the mind keeps illusions."

As they were finishing preparing Sofia's room and putting the swing and the football cage in the yard again, Callie had spent the night talking about Sofia and answering sincerely any questions that crossed her ex-wife's mind about their little girl.

The two women had even laughed, rediscovering for one and discovering for the other that despite appearances, they had also had good moments.

With her trembling voice, the brunette also had to explain the painful part, including the reasons why Sofia lived in New York and therefore obviously the battle for custody.
Impassive, Arizona had listened to her without shuddering. Then, a sorry smile on her lips she had lifted the chin of the Latin girl who was shamefully looking down and had only whispered in a desolate chuckle.

- Well, I think it's safe to say we both suck...With a sad smile on her face, she had shrugged the shoulders...The advantage of not being perfect is that it gives us a chance to do much better. Apparently, we have quite a bit of room for improvement.

Callie had sighed with relief. She was amazed that everything run so smoothly.

She was wondering how they had lost this connection that had been natural from the very beginning of their relationship and that it's been settled between them since Arizona woke up from her coma.

In such a situation, three years ago they would have killed each other. If the Latin woman could make a wish right now, she would only ask for things with Arizona stay that way. She would not even want more. Just this peace and benevolent relationship of trust, would satisfy her fully now.

While her eyes lost in the distance, she was silently saying to herself, that when a bond had been so strong, even it was dormant, it continued to exist, and that her ex-wife had become easily important again because she had never ceased to be so, Arizona put affectionately her hand on the arm of the brunette absorbed in her thoughts.

- You should get some rest. I've exhausted you with all my questions. I'm way too excited... I…I 'm unable to close an eye. You know, too much goes on in my head, but you should go lie down in my bed and rest for a few hours

- You... Are you sure? ... I can go back to Meredith's if you want to stay ... Arizona frowns, not seeing what could disturb the Latina. Well, you always wanted me to leave you alone when you had stuff to deal with in your head.

- Calliope... I don't know how I used to react, and I really feel like I don't agree with most of these habits, but at this point, in the mess of my life, I'm more than happy you are here. Come on, go get some sleep, I'll call my parents, and I'll get a plane ticket for Sofia. I love everything I can do with my new phone...

- I told you, you're totally addicted... not to mention dating sites.

- I... I go to dating sites?. Oh my God, it's pathetic.

- Everyone does that now.

- Are you doing that?

- Uh... no... I do not look my best with this flirting chitchat thing. The champion in this field, you know, words and great speech, is more you...

- Are you saying I'm the one who wrapped you up just by talking ! Exclaims the blonde in a big burst of laughter

- Totally. Maybe, there were a couple of other little things that attracted me too... Sweeping the blonde's body by laughing, the Latina sends her a suggestive wink as she heads towards the stairs... I am more in my comfort zone when I dance... Oh yeah, I'm really good at this and I definitely got you... Callie climbs the steps by swinging her hips

Blushing, Arizona sniffs. She could not prevent her mind from venturing towards the images of the brunette moving through a salsa rhythm. Her eyes were lost in the distance when Callie's laughter reached her ears.

- ... Arizona, living that in real life is beyond measure!...

Callie roared with laughter, pretending to dance to an imaginary salsa tune. The blonde closes her eyelids trying to erase the film that was playing in her mind. It was more of a fantasy than a memory, but it gave meaning to the thrills and the little squeeze in her throat that she had often felt in the presence of the orthopedist since coming out of the coma.

However, the blonde felt that she should not continue on this tempting road. There were too many unknowns in this equation, and above all, there was a little girl who was to be her only concern for now.

She grabbed her phone, it was early in Wyoming, Sofia should still be asleep.

- Hey mom...

- Arizona, oh honey... I ... It's so good to hear your voice. Barbara leaves a few tears running... How are you, honey? I... I'm so happy... I... I was so scared. I thought I was having a heart attack when I heard about it. Does your shoulder still hurt? and... your ribs... Is that better? ...

- Mom I'm fine... I'm fine

- Dad and I were so anxious... Thank God, Callie's with you. She has been awesome, she kept us updated a couple times a day... And you know, we totally relied on her. We totally trusted Callie... Barbara giggles... Even your father, just to say. We knew she would take care of you perfectly. As she always does...

- Mom...mom...Please, let me have a word...

- Oh yeah, of course, honey. I'm sorry. I was so frustrated that I neither could see nor talk to you...

- Is Sofia sleeping? Her mother was not easy to stop, but the mention of her granddaughter was enough to interrupt her speech.

- Yeah... uh...Do you remember her?

- No, still not, and it makes me feel so bad... The blonde was looking helpless... Callie says I'm a good mom, but am I really, mom? Sometimes I 'm afraid that she will embellish things a little bit about me so as not to offend me

- Callie doesn't do that, honey. Callie is an honest and straightforward person... At times even too much... Barbara chuckles with affection. Arizona could sense that her mother loved her ex-wife, in any case more than his father apparently did. You know, she can make little lies and big promises, but you know, it's always to make you feel better. You have to try to understand her, Arizona. A lot of things have been difficult for her, too. How's it going between you two, honey?

The arrival of the colonel behind Barbara, saves Arizona from this question which was on everyone's lips, when it came about Callie Torres.
She realized that their story had been rather eventful and that they had hurt each other, furthermore Callie had not been lenient towards herself when she told her about the episode of the court for custody, leaving to Arizona the best role on this point. But she couldn't figure out why everyone was so worried about them together, and weirdly, she didn't want to know right now, and especially not from the mouth of her mother who did not seem to her completely impartial in this field. Her eyes go towards the person who stood up behind her mother.

- Hey dad!

- How are you, my daughter? The colonel looked worried

- I... I'm fine, dad. It's a shock to learn that I'm a seven-year-old girl's mother, amongst other things, but... but... I'm still up to my feet.

- You're the greatest fighter I've ever known, honey. I know you stay up, you always do, my girl. The colonel looks pointedly into his daughter's eyes. … But, Arizona, you have the right to sit down sometimes, and let yourself go ...

- Dad, I ... I ... I'm so confused. I learn things about myself that I don't understand... I... I wasn't who you raised me for... I... I'm not a good man in the storm, dad... The voice broken by emotion, the blonde was doing her best to avoid looking at the screen, and cross her parents' eyes.

Barbara and Daniel share a look, the father shakes his head in front of his daughter's sadness.

- Arizona, listen to me... The man clears his voice by scraping his throat. Being a good man in the storm, only means that even on bad days we must keep hoping and keep fighting, relying on the people you love and those who love you. It doesn't mean that you have to be strong on your own, against wind and tide and reject help... When we lost your brother, I wasn't a good man in the storm either.

- Dad, it's not the same ... Timothy's loss wiped us out...

- Exactly, we were devastated ... The three of us. And I only saw my pain. I was in so much pain I didn't think about your mother's, or even yours. I locked myself up alone in mourning and didn't let anyone else in.

What her father said was a rather recent memory in the Arizona's calendar. To her, Timothy had passed away just over a year ago, and her father had ceased to pronounce her brother's name as soon as military honors had been bestowed upon his son.
He didn't want to talk about him, and if someone did, he just left the room.
Arizona watched her father still fight with this unspeakable grief as he first evoked it in front of her.

- When the storm rages, the sailors support one another, they never fight alone. If I let you think that's who we're supposed to be, then I'm the one responsible. I should have taught you and your brother, that you were allowed to be afraid, to be vulnerable, and even to make mistakes. You know, your tomorrow's truth feeds on your yesterday's mistakes. It's the lessons and the strength we draw from them that are important, and I know that you have learned from your mistakes... I'm so sorry honey, that learning this, like it did for me, cost you so much pain.
Some tears rolled down the blonde's cheeks. She did not remember her behavior, but she guessed through her parents' words that she must have been difficult and hard, and that it had caused a great upheaval in her and her family's life. Her parents' eyes on the screen were also shining... I am so proud of the person you are, my girl. You need to let Callie help you this time, honey.

The colonel glances at his daughter, whom he knew well enough to understand that she had used him to dodge her mother's question... I think I interrupted you. You were going to answer Mommy, wasn't you? Daniel again poses "the" question to his daughter with a malicious look… So how things are going with Callie?

- I... I don't know... I know now that I'm the one who hurt her, yet she doesn't blame me. She is so adorable and so understanding, and she mainly tells me about happy times together, but...but then, why did I cheat on her? and ... Why did we get divorced? ... And why does she always have this sad shadow in her eyes when she looks at me?... Oh, you know what? ... I ... I don't want to talk about it anymore... I have to take care of my daughter now and for now it's more than enough.

- Arizona, I wasn't always Callie's biggest fan. I was worried about you, it seemed so not like you... I mean... I didn't think you were ready for this kind of story. Being the third parent, didn't seem to me like a good place for you... And...And I was afraid that you would suffer in this type of family. Yet your mother and I, have never seen you happier than when you met Callie and even more so after Sofia was born. Barbara with a big smile on her face, nodded her head, confirming what her husband was saying... Sofia gave us all a second life, Arizona. And I'm so grateful to your ex-wife for allowing me to be the grandpa... The colonel shut up abruptly, a silence took place. With his face illuminated with a smile that Arizona had not seen since childhood when her father returned after a long absence and she jumped into his arms; her father resumes in a playful tone; ... of the prettiest little girl in this whole world and who makes cranberry pie so good, I couldn't help but devour it for breakfast... The colonel winked at Arizona, telling his daughter that they had to postpone the conversation and he grabbed Sofia, who was jumping on his knees.

- Grandpa, you ate all the pie and left me none?! While scolding her grandfather, Sofia rubbed her sleepy eyes like a small squirrel, sending a whiff of love into Arizona's heart

- I don't, idiot... I always save the best for my two favorite girls in the whole world... Plus, I prefer to eat little girls than pie.

Laughing heartily, the man pretended to eat Sofia, who screamed and laughed, while Barbara smiled tenderly at the picture of her psych rigid husband, who literally melted whenever it came to his daughter or his granddaughter.

Arizona represses the tears that rose in her eyes also observing the complicity of her military of father with her child.

Her parents' happiness around Sofia warmed her heart. The last memories of them were those of desperate parents mourning their eldest son. She did not even remember ever seeing her father so tender even in her childhood memories. Visibly, Callie was right, Sofia wrapped around her little finger the whole Robbins family, and there were joy and happiness in her life and that of her child.

Facing the screen, the blonde was thinking that those ten years had not been the void she had imagined lately. She had done important things and mainly becoming a mom.

Sofia turns her head to the screen, seeing her mother, whom she had not yet seen.

- Hey mommy...

- Hey honey! Here's a little girl who should still be asleep... The blonde was amazed that the words came out so naturally.

- I... I... Opening her toothless mouth, Sofia yawns wide... I am no longer sleepy...

- So ...Arizona was laughing fondly... What would you say about flying today and coming home? Grandpa and grandma will drive you to the airport, then a stewardess will take care of you and...

- …And then, when I 'm in Seattle, you'll be there. And I'm gonna ask for your phone so I can text mama and tell her I got there okay. Sofia had learnt her lesson by heart

- Um...Your…Your mom will be there too... She'll pick you up at the airport with me. Arizona shows her arm sling . I can't drive a car...

- Yay! Great! So, mom, you can't go to work either? The Colonel's stern gaze on the little girl reminds her not to rejoice in someone's injury. The little one takes a sorry face ...Uh… Sorry. Does it hurt, Mom? You ...Did you fall because of your leg? Not even waiting for answers, Sofia jumps from her grandfather's lap. I ...I'm going to pack up my things!... The three grownups burst out laughing

- Sofia... Sofia...breakfast first! Reminds Barbara

- Okay nana!

After settling with her parents the whole organization for Sofia; Arizona had hung up.

All these family interactions troubled the blonde, she really loved it. She wondered how could she have forgotten all the happiness that had just been played out in front of her, and how she could have even categorically rejected the idea of being a parent and having a family.
Yet she had guessed that apparently her little girl was used to her mothers not communicating with each other and managing the messages herself. Callie, however, had not told her about the tension between them after the court, and that bothered her a bit.

On the table, the photo albums that Callie had brought back, catch her attention.
She opens one at random, and plunges eagerly into the images of the past. As hard as she was waiting, a shock or a thread to pull for the rest to come by turning each page; it was the life of a stranger that lay before her. Even though, through the images of their marriage, the blonde could feel how deep the relationship of these two girls wearing white dress, and who seemed to only talk to each other with their eyes must be; it didn't really help Arizona answer all the questions that were rushing through her head and specially to understand why she hurt Callie and why they had apparently gotten torn apart.

Abandoning this mortifying part, the blonde goes into the kitchen.
A few minutes later she carefully climbed the stairs trying to carry a tray, whose balance seemed precarious.

Arizona enters her room where Callie, holding her pillow firmly against her, slept deeply. Standing in the middle of the room, her eyes are attracted by the soothed face of the Latin woman who smiled in her sleep. The blonde stayed motionless a few minutes. She watched tenderly this stranger whom she must have taken in her arms, embraced and loved in every way, but whom she could not recall. In her sleep, stammering a few incomprehensible words in what seemed to be a dream, Callie moves.

- Wake up, pretty lady. Rubbing her eyes the way their daughter did a few hours ago; the Latin woman wakes up slowly. Arizona puts the tray on the nightstand. Did you sleep well?

- Oh my God, I can't remember the last time I slept so well ... Uh... I had forgotten how great it was to sleep in this bed... I've never found better bedding since. Seeing the incomprehension pass in the eyes of the blonde, Callie chuckles... I ...I can say it...Because...Uh... because that was our bed... You know, before the divorce... But...but when we broke up, you took our bed and I took the one from the guest room, where I had already been sleeping in for over 30 days anyway

- Oh... I...I guess that's the dark part of our story... Not wanting to get into this conversation the blonde shakes her head to drive away these thoughts... Whatever... I just wanted to let you know that Sofia arrives at the airport at 4:00, and we should get ready to go to pick her up. I ... I thought you might be hungry and I made you a coffee with a dash of milk, scrambled eggs and French toast ... I'm gonna take a shower and get ready.

Callie was tongue -tied. That did not happen to her very often, but the blonde was one of the only persons with that power. Arizona had left her without a word more than once.
She had felt her ex-wife's discomfort as soon as she mentioned their divorce, but what had really left her open-mouth was the composition of her favorite breakfast. It couldn't have been a coincidence. Arizona had no memory of their common life, but it seemed that details as insignificant as the way Callie liked to drink her coffee in the morning, were engraved in her. Silently the brunette recapitulated:The perfume, no coffee after 4:00, morning coffee with a teardrop of milk, but unfortunately none of that gave her any clue about this damn breakup point that obsessed her.

Alone in the room, enjoying her delicious breakfast, the Latina was thinking. She had slept like a baby and if she was honest, it was not only thanks to the mattress. The perfume of Arizona was everywhere on the pillows and if this kind of sensation did not trigger the memory for her ex-wife, it awakened in the Latin woman's memories what she had buried deep inside her to get to move on.
The question seemed to be pending. Had she really managed to move on to another life or rather to somebody else. Suddenly, nothing seemed less obvious to the brunette. She had to admit that since she was in Seattle, her thoughts had been more occupied by the blonde than by her girlfriend still in New York.

Arizona gets out of the bathroom

- You seem to be dreaming again, Calliope. If you want to take a shower to wake up, the place is free.

After getting ready in turn, the Latin woman joins Arizona who was waiting for her sitting on the sofa in the living room, her eyes fixed on the floor.

The nervous movements of her right foot were evidence of the blonde's anxiety, while it was time to leave for the airport.

-Arizona, I's gonna be okay. She loves you, and you love her, that's all that matters.

- But... she doesn't know I've forgotten her... And you say she can understand that, and... And adapt to everything, but don't we tend to believe a little too quickly that she can understand everything?... She is just a child and I feel like she's not telling us how she feels...

- Another thing she would have gotten from you then?... Trying to de-dramatize the moment, the Latina laughed... For my great misery!...

The jokes of the brunette did not really reach Arizona who frowned and stood up to leave.

- I can't even remember who I am, anyway! ... That doesn't really help me understand her. And ... And if I don't know how to react... And if she thinks I'm weird... and if...

Suddenly, the Latin woman pulls Arizona against her, hugging her affectionately, she whispers in her ear.

- Listen to me. We're gonna pick up our kid and you're gonna be great like you always are!

The indescribable feeling of serenity and belonging that she found in this embrace, overwhelmed the blonde. It was like going home after an extended vacation. Whatever the luxury services hotels offer; nothing can compete with the warmth of your home. At some point you need to feel at home, and Arizona knew for sure, Callie's arms were her home.

Her eyes plunging deep into black eyes, the emotional blonde stared at Callie.

There was no longer that little sad shadow that she always saw there; they only shone with deep tenderness. For a brief second, the blue eyes fell on the perfectly drawn lips that she had secretly admired for days, when she raised them to Callie's; a spark of desire had taken the place of any other light in the black eyes, and the next second, as if they knew the way by heart, their lips met.

It was a soft and tender kiss. One hand of the brunette sinks into the blonde's hair while the other moves towards her waist, keeping her tightly tight against her.

Arizona had no intention of running away, she takes the face of the Latin woman in her hands and deepens the kiss.

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