Chapter 12.

This was not going at all the way she had planned. Having sex with Angel was supposed to make them closer. Angel was supposed to carry her up to her room and lay her gently on her bed. He was supposed to whisper beautiful things and look deep into her eyes and scream her name. It was only now that she realized that not once had he said her name. Even without all the romantic notions, which were apparently fiction, she never imagined she would be opening the door at two in the morning to Spike and a tub of choc chip ice cream.

"Spike. Come on in I guess. Close the door will you."

"How about 'hello Spike. Thanks for coming over at two in the morning even though you were probably sound asleep' ." Liar, you weren't even close to sleeping.

"I never said you had to come over. But since you're here do you want bowls or do you just want spoons?"

"What are you talking about blondie?"

"The ice-cream you brain drain"

Spike followed her into the kitchen a little begrudgingly but hell he was over there he might as well try to help. In answer to her question Spike took a seat at the kitchen counter and stabbed his spoon into his pint of choc chip indicating for Buffy to do the same. It had been a long time since he had been inside the Summers house. The place was still large, fancy and cold, almost to the point of being sterile.

Mirroring his actions with the ice-cream Buffy realized that there was something unnerving and yet comforting about having Spike back in her kitchen after all these years. More worrying still was the distinctly intimate feeling of sharing ice-cream from a tub in the sleep ruffled hours of pre-morning. It struck her as odd that only a few hours ago she was having sex with her boyfriend and yet it was this moment in time that was striking a chord within her.

How the hell does he do that?

How does an aggravating, self opinionated bleach blonde send butterflies to her stomach when her body barely notices Angel even in his most romantic moments. Then to add insult to increasingly serious injury, watching Spike lick his spoon clean or subconsciously take his bottom lip into his mouth to remove tell tale traces of indulgence. It was more than any red blooded woman could take.

Right there, in that moment, all Buffy wanted was to kiss those soft, warm lips and lean into his embrace. It could never happen of course, they were bearly on speaking terms again and anyway they would drive each other insane. No it would never work. She would just have to ignore the little voice inside telling her to take a chance.

Buffy gave a small involuntary sigh and looked up to find she now had Spike full attention.

"So, Buffy. Were you looking for someone to talk to or did you just want some company?"

"Gee Spike, your compassion overwhelms me"

"Don't get all snappy. I just wanted to know what's on your mind Summers. Can't help if I don't know what's up now can I?" Don't say Angel. Don't say Angel.

"Thanks. The main problem is something I would rather deal with on my own but I am glad of the company"

"Alright then, neutral corners. So how was Cheerleading practice last week…."

And there was that smirk again.

At five thirty on Saturday morning Spike woke up just in time to catch the end credits of the video he and Buffy were supposed to be watching. They had talked about nothing in particular for a solid hour give or take a few sarcastic comments and the occasional assault on his fashion sense. It had been much more relaxed than he had ever thought possible. Maybe it was the stillness of early morning or maybe it was the fact that none of her friends were around but he could almost see himself falling for a girl like her. Then again he could also almost see himself working as a high impact stunt person except for the pain, anguish and possibility of a violent, agonizing end. He figured falling in love with Buffy Summers would prove quite a similar fait.

As he woke he became more aware of the still sleep enveloped, petite blonde resting her head on his shoulder.

How the hell does she do that?

How could such an aggravating, self opinionated woman fit so neatly into his arms and if he was not VERY careful his life? More to the point would it really be so horrible if she did fit back into his life?

As Buffy began to stir Spike turned his thoughts away from the confronting subject matter and untangled himself. After covering her with the couch rug and desperately trying not to think about the fact that she was so beautiful he could scream, he tried to think of one good reason why Angel wasn't here in her arms.

Shaking his head Spike walked over to an old writing desk in the corner ready to leave her a note when Buffy spoke.

"Trying to sneak away?"

"Trying not to wake you up actually."

"Oh, thanks. Are you leaving?"

"Well that was the idea. Do you want me to stay?"

"Whatever, just thought you might be lonely"

Her verbal response was crisp and clear but her eyes suggested the SHE was lonely. They always gave her away.

Spike thought on what a potentially disastrous mistake he was about to make but there was something in those eyes that reminded him of the little girl who had once been his best friend.

"I guess I could stick around. Mum's on the graveyard shift, she wont get home till nine or ten this morning. But don't you want to get some sleep?"

"Not really that tired. Lot on my mind."

Spike knew he should stay out of it. They were only barely speaking again to begin with. Still, for some reason his common sense was always the first casualty of spending time with Buffy.

"Your too good for him you know?"

"What do you mean?"

"Angel. What has the jerk done now?"

"He's not a jerk, he's my boyfriend."

"He's not worth it. You deserve someone so much better."

"What about Drew? Was she good enough? Did she deserve you?"

"Forget it, I'm not getting into this now. Let's stop ex bashing and talk about something else."

"Angel isn't my ex !"

"Give it time goldie locks"

"You're impossible !"

"Not impossible just highly unlikely"

Buffy glared at the blonde bad boy and his trademark cocky grim. Spending time with him was rapidly getting to feel so natural, even fighting seemed more playful and exciting than anything she and Angel ever did. But she wasn't the same sweet, innocent little girl he had known. She had to make sure he knew that if they were ever going to be friends again.

"I'm not some naive little school girl you know, I'm not even a virgin, haven't been for a long time."

"Never said you were, or thought that you should be pet. It's not like I was saving myself in high school either."

Buffy was surprised to find that she was disappointed, even a little hurt that he wasn't the least bit shocked.

"Anyway Buffy, I for one don't blame you. Sex is hours of fun, so long as you do it right."

"hours?….I mean yeah! It's the best feeling ever."

Now that sounded week even to her own ears.

"Something tells me you don't really believe that"

"I've had lots of great sex, amazing sex even."

"Even if that's true, which I seriously doubt, something tells me you're still a virgin, you just forgot to tell your body."

"What the hell does that mean? Either you've done it or you haven't, there's no middle ground here Spike. Anyway, what would you know? What are your numbers like hot shot? Who have you slept with?"

Spike had dated a few people since high school but since Dru he was not exactly open to physical or emotional intimacy and as a result, though they had experienced and experimented with both sex and lovemaking countless times, he had only ever been with one woman. Still there was no reason Buffy ever needed to know that. Even Xander and Willow were unaware of exactly what his love life entailed.

"Firstly, sex and sleeping are two completely different sports and secondly a gentleman doesn't kiss and tell. Let's just say I'm a rebel with killer dress sense. I'm the local 'Big Bad', what do you think my numbers are like?"

Buffy frowned. Who was she kidding? Even Cordilia would take him to bed, so long as no one ever found out about it. He could have had sex tonight for all she knew. Making attempts to ignore the sensation in her stomach, one which felt alarmingly like jealousy, Buffy prepared to concede defeat. That is until she noticed a minor detail she had missed throughout their previous conversations.

"You're the Big Bad?"

Buffy laughed outright as Spike realized just how ridiculous he looked sitting there in boxers with little Garfield heads on them and a matching t-shirt with 'the cat's meow' printed on the front. It was easily the most ridiculous thing he owned but Dawn had given them to him for his birthday and he figured, who'd see?

Ha, great idea Spike, real intimidating.

"Garfield? Of all the prints you could choose you buy Big Bad Garfield pajamas! It's just too good!"

By this point Buffy was holding her side almost doubled over with laughter. He looked so mortified. Now if she could just stop think about how unbelievable appealing it was making him look she would be home free.

"Bloody Hell! They were a gift alright so lay off. I didn't comment on your sleepwear did I?"

You and your sexy bloody pajamas. Who looks sexy with a pony tail and bunny slippers? Are you listening to your self? Don't fall for her! I mean it !

"Hey, these are comfortable and I wasn't expecting company!"

"YOU invited ME remember!"

Buffy rolled her eyes but made no effort to kick him out.

"You want breakfast? I can make Pop Tarts."

"Summers, a toaster can 'make' Pop Tarts."

"Shut up. Do you want or not?"

You have no idea…

"Got any strawberry?"