Part 8
"They were fighting for the future, but the past seemed to reach out for them, from the bottom of all hells, covering them like a mist and soon they found themselves wondering in the fog again, blinder then before"
Fred was reading one of Cordelia's many fashion magazines. She wasn't really fond of fancy clothes like Cordy but now and then she liked to browse through magazines and check out the latest trends. She was so concentrated she didn't hear Buffy coming downstairs.
"Fred?" Buffy asked. Fred startled at the sudden noise. "Sorry."
"It's okay, I was just reading some magazines…" Fred's voice trailed off when she noticed the state Buffy was in, her face pale, her eyes lost. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah…I just… the dreams, they came back," Buffy said in a weak voice.
"Really? How did they manifest themselves?" Fred immediately asked. It was like an instinct that had grown on her along the years.
"Other slayers," Buffy simply said.
"Oh," Fred understood she really didn't want to talk about it.
"Where's everyone?" Buffy asked noticing they were all alone in the hotel.
"Out chasing demons. They didn't want to wake you to tell you the news," Fred said.
"What news?" Buffy jumped.
"We found out something. Cordy did actually. She went to the Oracles and they said you have to find your roots in order to find your daughter," Fred said.
"Sunnydale. We have to go to Sunnydale," Buffy whispered. "Now, we're going to Sunnydale."
She walked towards the door. She was about to walk out of the hotel when Fred stopped her.
"You want to go all by yourself? On foot?" she asked and Buffy froze in her place. "They'll be back soon, don't worry." Resigned, Buffy returned to the table, the door shutting behind her, pushed by Dennis. "You have to understand them."
"I know, you help the helpless," Buffy said. "Hmm, maybe I should've made an agency too."
"Yeah, like this you don't have to look for trouble, it comes directly to you. Though if I really think about it, we've caused like half the trouble we ran into. I always remember what Connor use to say…"
"Connor?" Buffy asked confused.
"Angel's first son," Fred said before she realized Buffy didn't know about him.
"He had another son?" Buffy asked surprised.
"Uhm…yeah, with Darla. But that was a one night stand gone bad and a lot of prophecies. He was a great guy…eventually," Fred said. "So he spend a part of his life in a hell dimension and was raised to hate Angel by this revenge thirsty old man whose family Angel killed when he was bad."
"Oh," Buffy simply said, still trying to understand all the things she had explained. "A lot of things happened since I last saw Angel."
"Things always change. I know it best. I was stuck in a demon dimension for five years, made me more then just a little wacky, but hey, now I'm back to my old self, if you don't count the massive obsession for tacos I have. And it's not just that. At first, when I came back, I was head over heals in love with Angel, then when I realized there could be nothing between us, I thought Angel and Cordy were meant for each other," she saw a shadow pass across Buffy's face. "But even if I thought they were, it turned out to be impossible and they just turned back to being friends, even if it hurt. Same story with me and Gunn…" her voice trailed off for a moment. "Except for us it wasn't impossible and I didn't come back from a higher type of existence for him. Maybe it was just too perfect. In the beginning I thought we were going to last, I knew we would, but in the end, I don't know what happened."
"I know the feeling. I dated someone like that, just too good to be true. I always looked for flaws and I think I was actually the one pushing him to commit them," Buffy said nostalgic.
"What happened to him?" Fred asked.
"He married Lara Croft," Buffy said. "And I let Spike down my pants."
"Oh," Fred said.
"And believe me I know a lot about changes, been through a billion of 'em. I guess it's just scary to see them on someone else. Especially someone you cared about. I've actually seen it on my friends, my family, but with them I was there from the first change to the very last…it wasn't that weird."
"I'd freak too if I left a broody ex and after 10 years found a happy camper instead," Fred said nodding. Buffy laughed, she was right. It was good to laugh again, even if the weight wasn't lifted from her heart, it was still there, like a rock trying to crush her.
"So how does it feel… Cordy and Gunn?" Buffy asked after she stopped laughing.
"Mostly strange, but it passes, with the time," Fred said. "With time changes become normal."
"I get that," Buffy nodded in agreement.
"Hello, ladies," Gunn came in carrying his ax behind. A tired Cordelia followed him.
"This is getting more and more exhausting every time, I'm getting too old for this," Cordy said catching her breath. "Maybe I should hang up the old ax and get back to office work."
"What are you talking about, you old? Get out of here!" Gunn laughed at the very thought. "You just haven't been in action for a while. You stepped out the last couple of cases, doing the desk job and all."
"So can we go now?" Buffy looked desperately at Fred.
"We have to wait for Angel," Fred told her.
"You told her," Cordy realized by the face Buffy made. "So I guess we're going to Sunnydale. My skin just crawls at the thought."
"Why?" Fred asked as if she didn't know.
"Hello, where do you think I have most of my childhood traumas from? And not necessarily because of the monsters," Cordy added.
"Well, you'll have to make a sacrifice," Fred said, serious.
"Yeah, yeah, I know," Crodelia sighed.
"You're not the only one who has to go back to a whole lot of memories," Buffy said silently.
"I know," Cordy said. "Maybe we get lucky and Sunnydale was wiped off the map of the world. I always thought that would happen if you weren't around anymore."
"I hope not," Buffy simply said, while Wesley appeared in the lobby, covered in slime from head to toe.
"What happened to you?" Fred asked smiling, holding back the laughter.
"Well, the eggs exploded when I was about to burn them…" Wesley started.
"They hatched?" Cordy asked handing him a towel.
"Exploded," Wesley said again. "And these little things started crawling all over the place. Didn't look like no baby Veskas to me."
"So what did you do?" Gunn asked.
"I squashed the little buggers," Wesley said while helplessly trying to clean his face. "Now if you'll pardon me I'll go shower in hope I can still scrub all the slime off my skin."
"No!" Buffy suddenly jumped. "We have to go to Sunnydale, there's no time."
"You told her," Wesley looked at Fred who smiled innocently. "Don't worry, Buffy, it's just a quick shower, it won't take forever," he climbed upstairs.
"That's what he thinks," Fred said after he had disappeared. "Gogra slime needs citric acid to be removed from skin before it gives hives. I didn't want to upset him."
"Let's hope we still have that extra crate of lemons Angel got from Europe," Cordy said immediately heading for the basement in search of that certain crate.
"Angel got lemons as a present?" Buffy asked amused.
"It was sort of a joke," Gunn said. "Gregor, always considered him to be sour as a lemon, so after we helped him with a problem…as a…gift he sent us all kind of fruits and stuff from his farm."
"Among which a crate of lemons especially addressed to Angel," Fred completed. She sighed. "Oh, take me back to Greece any day!"
"You went to Greece?" Buffy asked dreamingly.
"Yeah, that's where Gregor was from," Gunn said. "It was awesome."
"Is this going to be enough?" Cordy asked coming up with an arm full of lemons. "Couldn't carry the whole crate. It's huge."
"I think so," Fred said.
"Okay, then go tell Wesley," Cordy spilled the lemons into Fred's arms. "And here's a knife to cut them," she slipped a dagger into one of Fred's hands.
"Why me?" Fred asked, barely holding all the lemons in her embrace.
"You're the one who's comfortable with Wesley nudity, not us," Cordy said and Fred let out an exasperated sound.
"Oh, for god's sakes, like we didn't see each other naked when that mad doctor wanted to put us in cryogenic stasis," Fred said and Cordy shuttered.
"Yes, but must you remind us?" Cordy asked.
"Worst cold I ever got," Gunn remembered too.
"Just go, Fred," Cordy said and Fred climbed up mumbling something she couldn't understand. "I hate it when she talks pylean around us."
"It only bothers you cause you don't get squat of what she's saying," Gunn said smiling.
"Hey," a sleepy voice greeted them. Little Wesley was coming downstairs, even though he was dressed, his hair was a mess.
"Hey yourself, sleepy head," Cordy smiled.
"Where's mom?" he asked looking around, noticing his mother's absence.
"Mommy and daddy are out hunting vampires," Gunn said.
"What's aunt Fred doing with all the lemons?" the boy asked sitting down.
"Helping uncle Wesley with a skin problem," Cordy smiled.
"Oh," the boy let out rubbing his eyes, he obviously hadn't slept well.
"Hungry?" Gunn asked and the boy nodded. He took Gunn's hand and they went into the kitchen.
"Cordy, what's Wesley? I mean he can…" Buffy didn't know how to put it into words.
"Read minds?" Cordy understood what she meant, but had trouble putting Wesley's abilities in a certain category herself.
"Yeah, something like," Buffy settled for that option.
"Well you didn't expect a vampire and a slayer to have a normal kid did you?" Cordy asked. "At least he wasn't prophesied like…"
"Connor?" Buffy asked and Cordy was surprised she knew. "Fred told me."
"Oh. Well Connor was sort of normal, you know except for the strength and great fighting techniques, Wesley on the other hand is what you'd call a brain child," Cordy explained. "He's suppose to have great mental powers…telekinetic, mind reading, that sort of thing."
"You seemed a little surprised this morning," Buffy remembered.
"Because it's suppose to show only when he'll be a teenager, when he turns fifteen or something like that. We never mentioned that we knew about his powers, so he was probably too scared to tell us. We always knew, but we just weren't ready for it," Cordy thought.
"And he just kept it for himself? It must've been hard on him. He's only a child," Buffy said thinking of her Fatima.
"Sometimes he is, sometimes I feel like he's older then me," Cordy said. "I keep thinking maybe it's because of Angel being so old, maybe he got some of that…oldness. I keep on expecting him to suddenly grow up into a man…But that's just the Connor consequence."
"What happened to Connor?" Buffy suddenly asked.
"He's gone," Cordy simply said.
"Dead?"
"Left," Cordy corrected her. "I'm not exactly sure where he is right now. He went out to find 'a real place in the world' that's what he called it. He promised us he'll come back to tell us when he'll find that place. Angel understood him, gave him the whole blessing. He was better off with us if you ask me, but a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do."
"Doesn't he call? Or write?" Buffy found the whole idea ridiculous.
"Very rarely. I think we got one phone call, 2 letters and a postcard in like 7 years. The postcard being the last one, it came 2 or 3 years ago. Angel's still hoping he'll come back, his room's untouched. Sometimes I catch him just standing there. I don't think he'll ever be back though. Not here."
"That's sad," Buffy was truly saddened by her words.
"He already lost a son, that's why he's so afraid for Wesley. He's scared that when he'll get his powers he'll wind up getting too tired of fighting and he'll leave forever, but Wes isn't like that. Connor was, but not him," Cordy said, a bad feeling from the past overcoming her. Sometimes she just wished she could forget that whole period when Connor was around.
There was a moment of silence while Cordelia looked at Buffy hesitating. Should she tell her and get it over with?
"I'm half-demon," she suddenly said.
"Huh?" Buffy was distracted for a moment.
"I'm a half-demon. I can float and clean auras," Cordy said in a breath.
"Clean auras?" Buffy repeated. "Auras need to be cleaned?"
"If you've been in hell dimensions, yeah," Cordy said, happy the news hadn't shocked Buffy as she expected.
"I've been in one. My aura didn't seem dirty after," Buffy remembered.
"Well you have to be in one for a long time for it to really affect you, the aura…the soul gets intoxicated, absorbs the ugliness of the place" Cordy explained. She sat down on the couch before telling her: "Give me your hand."
Buffy looked at her doubtfully.
"C'mon, I don't bite," Cordy said.
"Angel said that once," Buffy smiled and sitting down next to her, gave Cordy her hand. Cordelia closed her eyes and a white glow enveloped her and then slowly passed over to Buffy. It lasted a few seconds before it faded away.
"Wow," Buffy said, a lazy smile crossing her lips. "That was…amazing! A person could get use to a feeling like that."
"Tell me about it, Angel's practically addicted to it," Cordy smiled too. "You have an interesting soul."
"I'll take your word on that. Definitely needed a clean-up," Buffy said.
"Had a few spots," Cordy agreed. "I saw something…"
"What?" Buffy asked surprised.
"I don't know, I don't usually see things…but there was this bright light. It was so warm and...uhm, comforting I couldn't stay away from it," Cordy said confused.
"Oh, that light…I thought I must still have it somewhere."
"What was that, Buffy?" Cordy asked.
"That… was heaven, a part of it, a memory," Buffy said rubbing her face, tired.
"Doesn't it bother you that I'm a half-demon?" Cordy changed the subject.
"Hell no, you seem to forget the variety of friends I had," Buffy laughed at the thought. "Besides since when do you care?"
"Since when do I care?" it suddenly hit Cordy she had been ridiculous about the whole thing.
"I think he'll be a while," Fred came downstairs smiling. "His skin was already itching."
"Please, spare us the details," Cordy put up a hand.
"I haven't seen him this red since Angel 'forgave' him," Fred said pressing on the word 'forgave'.
"What?" Buffy asked confused.
"Wesley flew solo for a while. Actually a couple of years. He stole Connor when he was a baby thinking – because of this bogus prophecy – Angel was going to kill his son. And that lead to Connor being kidnapped by Holtz and taken to hell so Angel was really pissed. He attacked Wes when he was in the hospital. We tried to get Angel to forgive him, but--" Cordy explained.
"You know how stubborn Angel is. So after Connor left, we finally talked him into it seeing Wes again. Wesley got the stupid idea of telling him to punch out his differences while he didn't budge," Fred continued. "He probably thought he wouldn't do it…"
"Big mistake. He beat the crap out of him," Cordy concluded. "But then they talked things over and over and over… and eventually Angel forgave him or at least he said so. I think he only really forgave him when he stood by Faith when she gave birth."
"Wow," Buffy let out.
"Wow what?" Faith came in limping.
"What happened to you?" Cordy asked.
"Nasty vampire woke up before he should," Faith said wincing in pain. "I got a nasty cut."
Angel appeared next to her, his left arm badly burnt. Before anyone could ask Faith said:
"I broke a window."
"And I was standing right in front of it," Angel added.
"Looks pretty bad," Fred said.
"It'll heal. It'll be gone in a few hours," Angel assured her.
"Sure you don't need first aid or something?" Cordy asked him.
"Yeah," Angel said.
"But I sure would," Faith said throwing herself on the couch.
"I'll get the kit," Fred left the room.
"So what've you girls been gossiping about?" Faith asked as she pulled the pants up from her left leg. She had an ugly wound starting from under her knee going down her leg, it was pretty deep.
"Well you know, nothing and everything," Cordy said vaguely.
"Thank you for enlightening me," Faith said smiling. Fred returned with the first aid kit and started cleaning Faith's wound. She feared that it was so deep the bone showed.
"Can we go now?" Buffy suddenly asked.
"You told her," Angel looked at Cordy.
"She told her," Cordy pointed towards Fred.
"I think I'll have to sit this one out," Faith said. "A limping slayer is not a helping slayer to have around."
"It'll close in an hour," Buffy dismissed her excuse.
"I don't think it will. It's gonna take more then a couple of hours. It's deep," Fred said.
"Someone has to sit and watch Wes anyway. Just give those slayers a kick for me, okay?" Faith looked at Buffy and smiled.
"I'll just go change and we'll leave, all right?" Angel gave Buffy a comforting look.
"Okay," Buffy said, then added a bit uncomfortable. "Can you make it by sunlight?"
"Oh, almost forgot about that," Angel admitted, though it was hard to believe he forgot when his arm was still smoking.
"We use this sunlight block spell for emergencies. It lasts around 48 hours," Fred explained.
"And this is an emergency," Angel said giving Buffy a warm smile.
"I think Wesley might be skipping the trip too," Fred suddenly said.
"Why?" Angel stopped hallway up the stairs.
"He got rashes all over. Those Veskas turned out to be Gogras. You know the ones with the acid slime?" Fred said and Angel made a grimace.
"I guess it's just the five of us," Angel said before continuing upstairs.
"Yeah, just us," Buffy repeated. She was impatient to leave, but the thought of returning to Sunnydale gave her goose bumps.
Sunnydale seemed beaten down by time, the years had left their ugly mark upon it. Some of the houses they use to pass by on their way to school, seemed wrecked and abandoned, the paint faded, covered in weeds, only few remaining at their old glory. The Sunnydale Highschool stood tall and proud, as it had since the day it had been rebuilt, seeming to promise that this time nothing and no one could tear it down, not even dynamite, not even snake-like demons. Oh, how many stories it held under its new walls, under the rubble, under the earth. How many had found their doom in its hallways? How many had survived? How many had Buffy saved, how many witches had found their power here besides one redhead everyone had loved? How many demons had lost their powers like Anyanka? And how many lost teenagers still tried to make it out alive of Sunnydale High? The answer to all these questions was simple: many. The car passed by the old highschool with Cordy and Buffy still staring after its ghostly shadow, lost in thoughts.
They passed by the Bronze to find it in ruin, the once bright sign of the club being broken and dark, only the word Bonz remaining on it. It seemed that Sunnydale had left its number one club for another and the place where 'Dingoes ate my baby' played a long time ago was abandoned.
The Magic Box on the other hand was bright and cheery and Buffy shook her head. She asked herself how many more shop owners had died during the last years. No one could own the magic shop too long without being killed or attacked at some point. Even Giles had had his share of misfortunes when he had taken over the business.
Buffy was getting nervous, they were nearing her old house and her stomach was turned upside down just at the thought. So many memories she had to face and perhaps for the first time after many years she had to fight as a slayer again. Angel looked at her in the back mirror. She couldn't tell if he was looking at her since he had no reflection, but he was. He knew how bad she must feel, going back to something she had abandoned and buried in her past. He had felt the same when he had returned to Ireland after two centuries. He just hoped she was ready to face whatever had taken her daughter.
Fred, who was standing beside him put a comforting hand on his shoulder. It was a gesture that meant 'everything's going to be okay, don't worry, we're here'. He smiled in gratitude.
Cordelia seemed lost in her own little universe, one not even Gunn could shake her out of. He only put a comforting hand around her shoulders, and held her to his chest. He couldn't know that Sunnydale reminded Cordelia – besides the hell that had been Sunnydale High and her presence in the scooby gang – of her family and most important her father. A father that had abandoned her and left her to rot in poverty after a lifetime spent in luxury. She let her head rest on Gunn's chest. She hated when those memories surged up and haunted her.
Finally, the Summers home appeared, seeming even older and desolating then the rest of Sunnydale. This wasn't the Summers home, it was only the skeleton that had remained after the family that once dwelled inside it had disappeared in death or other cities.
Angel pulled in the drive way and they got out of the car. Buffy thought he looked even better in sunlight then he did in the darkness. He seemed…well almost human. For some reason though the image didn't seem strange. Maybe because in the past she had dreamed
of him in daylight too many times. She had wondered why he didn't use the spell all the time, but when she had seen it done, she understood it was too complicated to be done every two days.
"What's wrong?" Angel asked when she saw her staring at him.
"Nothing, I just never really saw you in daylight," Buffy admitted.
"The sun'll be setting soon," Angel said turning towards the sun in stead of denying her words - she had seen him in daylight before, she just couldn't remember. Even if now it was a pretty common thing for him, the sun never seemed to stop surprising him with its majestic beauty. He figured it was because he was a vampire and he was damned to roam in the darkness not the light.
"Ready?" Cordy asked Buffy putting a hand on her shoulder. Buffy took a deep breath and nodded while Gunn pulled an ax and several other weapons out of the trunk. He handed Angel the ax. It had been the vampire's ax for 10 years, the one he had fought with and grown fond of over the years, but this time Angel refused it handing it over to Buffy. She was the leader of this case.
The slayer advanced to the front door and her hand, trembling, not from fear, but emotion, gripped the handle. She slowly opened the door – the neighborhood kids must've forced it open, they would've done the same anyway – it screeched loudly. It was rusty. No one had entered the house for a while. She went inside and the state the house was in depressed her. Everything was full of dust. Some broken chairs lying on the floor, the once beautiful carpets were eaten away by pests and everything seemed to creek and crack. If she didn't know better she'd believe the house was about to fall on their heads.
Cordy coughed when the dust rose in the air when she picked up a fallen cloth.
"Boy, with the LA air you'd think I'd be use with a little dust," she said dropping the moldy old cloth back on the floor with a grimace. "Ew"
"So where is it?" Gunn asked looking around the house. He didn't see no morphing slayer anywhere.
"It has to be around here. Somewhere," Buffy said looking around, not knowing where to search or what to search for.
"Didn't the oracles say anything?" Fred turned to Cordy. She shook her head.
"All they said was that she has to find her way to her roots. Listen to her blood," Cordy said.
"Okay I listened to my freaking blood, I'm in Sunnydale and they don't show?" Buffy was getting impatient.
"Maybe it's upstairs," Fred suggested. Buffy suddenly froze, she heard a voice, a whispering in the wind.
'Follow the blood…blood of the sacred…blood of the slayers,' the voice sang in her ears.
"Did you hear that?" Buffy asked the others, but they didn't seem to have heard anything.
'Follow the blood…' the voice whispered again.
"You heard it right?" Buffy asked again.
"What is it saying?" Angel asked her. They didn't hear anything.
"Follow the blood. Blood of the sacred. Blood of the slayers," Buffy repeated the voice's exact words.
'Follow your blood, slayer…' the voice sang and a little light appeared in front of her eyes and ran up the stairs whispering intelligible words.
"It's upstairs," Buffy said and headed for the stairs.
"Should we…" Gunn started, but Buffy cut him off:
"I have to go alone," Buffy said as she entered a trance like state.
'What are you waiting for?' the voice asked again. Buffy moved upstairs, ignoring the noise the stairs made as she walked, ignoring the ghosts that seemed to call her from every room. Her smiling mother, Tara shot in the prime of her youth, a very young Dawnie and herself when she was just 16. She stopped in front of her old room. For some reason she felt the awkward feeling of having to knock on the door, like she was disturbing someone who was inside. She opened the door slowly and her eyes went wide when she spotted Fatima sitting down on the bed.
"Fatima?" her voice trembled.
"Mommy?" the little girl looked up, confused to see her mother there, then she disappeared.
"Fatima?" Buffy asked again whimpering. Suddenly another figure appeared in front of her, abruptly, like she had been torn out of the universe and put there.
"You're looking in the wrong place," Tara said before she faded away, leaving silence behind her. Still holding on to the doorknob, Buffy fell to her knees, crying. Fatima had never set foot in Sunnydale and the ghosts of the slayers had not brought her here. Her image had been only an illusion. And Tara? Why Tara? Had it really been her? Had the sweet witch returned from heaven to tell her she had been wrong? No, it couldn't have been her. Tara was gone. Then who? The shape shifter again? No. Tara, Tara…then it suddenly hit her, the voice of the prime slayer. She had used her before why wouldn't she use her again?
She got up though her knees still trembled and she felt like any kind of strength she had, had disappeared from the moment the door had opened.
"Buffy?" a weak voice asked. It was Fred. "Are you okay?"
The slayer wiped away the tears with her sleeve before telling her:
"Yeah. She's not here. They're not here. We're in the wrong place."
"Are you sure?" Fred asked, though the state the slayer was in told her it was true.
"Positive. We have to go back to LA," Buffy added as she went downstairs, leaving behind her the haunted hallways of her youth. Fred followed her, worried.
"Well?" came an impatient question from Gunn.
"Nothing. We're in the wrong place," Buffy repeated the phrase.
"I hate it when this happens," Cordy said exasperated. "It's good to know this trip was pointless. Just sliced old wounds open for nothing!"
"Cordelia!" Angel rose his voice.
"I'm sorry…It's just I wasn't really ready to come back here," Cordelia apologized.
"You and me both," Buffy said looking around the house uneasy. "If I think of everything I've gone through in this house and look at it now. It's a dump."
"What now?" Gunn asked looking for answers. He didn't regret the trip. He finally got to see what the famous Sunnydale looked like.
"We go back to LA," Angel said. "We probably overlooked something."
"Like what? Buffy's roots are here. This is where everything happened. The parental house," Cordy reminded him.
"Is it?" Angel asked. He wasn't sure.
"What if it's not her roots we're talking about? There's a lot of talk of blood. Kindred blood. Blood of the sacred. Blood of the slayers," Fred suggested. "What if it's the root of all the slayers?"
"The root of all slayer is evil," Angel said surprising everyone. "Evil is what brought on the appearance of the first slayer. Or vampires."
"And we're suppose to…guess where the first slayer appeared?" Gunn didn't like the idea.
"So was there like a first watcher?" Cordy asked and Angel shook his head.
"I don't think so. This first slayer, from what Buffy said, sounds primordial, uncontrollable," Angel said.
"Hence no watcher," Cordy got it.
"They must've appeared later on," Angel said.
"Which would rule out going to England," Fred told them. "Then the root of all slayers can't be the Watcher's Council, right?"
"It's the first slayer," Gunn understood.
"But how the hell are we suppose to find out where she's from?" Cordy asked.
"The watcher's council might know at least about the grave," Angel suggested.
"We find the first slayer – dead or alive – and we'll find the root," Gunn finished. "We find the root, we find Buffy's daughter. End of story."
"Where is Buffy?" Cordy suddenly asked. They all realized while they had gotten carried away with their conversation the slayer had disappeared.
"I'll go find her. Cordy you're coming with me. Gunn, Fred stay here in case something does happen," Angel decided.
"I think it would be best if you went alone. She doesn't want to see anyone now, it'll be easier for her if it'll be just you," Cordy said with her back turned away from Gunn and Fred. Before Angel could protest her lips formed the word 'Please' without making a sound.
Angel nodded in approval. Cordy didn't want to leave Gunn and Fred alone. She was still paranoid about them, but she didn't want to show it because she loved them both and her distrust would only hurt them. Angel understood her.
As he left the house his thoughts turned to Buffy. She was obviously in despair that she hadn't found her daughter. He knew how she felt. He had felt the same after his attempt with black magic to bring Connor back had ended in failure. The problem was he didn't know if he could mend her broken heart this time.
"I wonder if they found her," Wesley asked as he sipped the tea from the cup Faith had just handed him. His skin was sore from the acid slime and the lemon juicy he had put on it. He winced in pain at every movement.
"We'll know soon enough," Faith assured him. Wesley winced in pain when he put the cup back down on the table and Faith smiled.
"Sometimes I wonder if he still hates me," the british man said sighing.
"He doesn't hate you. Maybe he still has an old grudge, but that's no reason to send you to the slime monsters," Faith told him.
"That's not as comforting as it sounds," Wesley told her and she lifted her shoulders.
"Then think of it another way. He needed all the help he could get. He wouldn't play a prank when he needs you most" Faith said and Wesley nodded.
"Good point," he said. "So did you talk to Wes? How long has he been having these powers?"
"From his birth apparently," Faith said while she turned the water on in the sink and started washing the dishes.
"That long? How could the Oracles be wrong?" Wesley didn't understand.
"Beats me. All I get is that my kid probably knows more then I'll ever know and he's only 4," Faith said.
"And that bothers you?" Wesley was surprised.
"Hell no," she put away a cleaned plate. "Just makes me think how limited I am."
"There's something new," Wesley noted. "I thought all the book mombo-jombo wasn't for you, you were made to put evil out of its misery," he recited part of a speech she had made him.
"I'm beginning to think that was stupid. Maybe there's knowledge in books or something," Faith said while she started cleaning a knife.
"And it took you only what? 4, 5 years around me to figure that out?" Wesley asked smiling. "Where's all this coming from? Tell me some spirit didn't possess you" he joked, but Faith gave him no answer. "Faith?" he turned his head towards her. The slayer was holding a knife in her hand, staring at it like she was hypnotized. "Faith?" the ex-watcher stood up, ignoring his pain and stepped over to the slayer. "Faith are you okay?" Wesley noticed the blade of the knife was just an inch away from her wrist. "Let go," Wesley tried to get the knife out of her hand, but it seemed to be stuck. "Faith!" he tried to wake her from her reverie but she seemed frozen. "Faith!"
"Mommy!" little Wesley appeared in the doorway of the kitchen. Faith unfroze immediately, dropping the knife in the kitchen sink. She rushed to hug her son.
"What happened Wes, what happened?" Faith asked under her breath.
"I don't know," Wesley said from behind her, still stunned of what had happened.
"It's okay now, mommy," little Wes whispered in her ear. He knew what had happened, but he couldn't tell her. All he could say was that everything was going to be okay. Soon.
Angel was wondering through the streets of Sunnydale, not really knowing where he was going. The sun had set down a few hours ago and he still hadn't found Buffy. He went to all her favorite places, cemeteries, cafes, he even broke in the Sunnydale High, he took a stroll into the UC Sunnydale campus, he entered the old Bronze, the Magic Box, anything he knew would hold memories for her, but there was no sign of the blond slayer anywhere. He returned to the Summers home but she hadn't come back there. He decided to go to the Bronze one last time before retiring back into her old house and just wait for her to decide it was time to come back.
After taking a tour around the collapsing Bronze he was about to give up when he heard struggle coming from the back alley. A fight. He went out the back door and found Buffy fighting a vampire. She hadn't really lost her skill over the years, it wasn't something to be lost because it was in her blood. He didn't interfere in the fight, leaving her to take out her frustrations on the vampire. She didn't even seem to notice him as she kicked and punched the vampire blindly. Soon though the vampire found his end in an improvised stake. Buffy was left panting from the effort.
"Hi," Angel said when she finally noticed his presence.
"Hi," Buffy said her breath coming back to normal.
"Been looking for you," Angel said.
"I know. You almost found me once," Buffy told him.
"So why didn't I?" Angel wanted to know, though he pretty much knew why.
"Needed some me time" she admitted and then added: "You know, I fought like thousands of demons and saved the world a bunch of times and never really got scared while doing it, but this…it's just overwhelming."
"I know," Angel said.
"And you know what the worse thing is? My own history is biting back at me. It's not some demon or vampire, it's slayers. You can't even do a good thing in this world that can't turn back and haunt you the moment you do something that upsets it," Buffy said. "I was tired of fighting, why didn't they get that? I needed a life. A real life one that didn't depend on demon hunting and patrol. What were they expecting? That I'll fight vampires till I'm sixty because I'm still alive?"
"Was it just that?" Angel asked.
"You wouldn't understand. You do what you do for redemption. And you and all your crew… At the end of the day you can still consider you have lives. Lives you love," Buffy sighed. "Maybe you were meant to fight demons, but it wasn't your duty. You can quit any time you want."
"But you know we can't, not when people's lives at stake," Angel told her, but she shook her head.
"What about my life? Was it worth sacrificing it all for the sake of humanity? Sure one little life for the lives of billions, but I wanted to live too. I wanted a normal life too. Once I did my duty, I killed myself to save the world, to save my sister. That could've been the end. That should have been the end. Another slayer in the endless line. And then the Watcher's Council would've made themselves a new slayer and history would've been made. But I'm here, aren't I? Back from the grave. And what did I have to show for it? Desperation and a broken heart. It's funny when you come back from heaven you have the feeling you're living in hell. And the feeling that I had to start over, just that thought made want to jump off a building again but I didn't do it. And why? For my sister and the stinking world that wants everything and gives nothing back. Not for my friends who were so ruthless, so selfish they tore me out of heaven. How could they even imagine I would wind up in hell? I was a slayer!" Buffy said in a breath.
"You don't mean that," Angel said and Buffy shook her head.
"Maybe I don't. I love them, but I don't know if I really ever forgave them. It was a stupid thing to do. Giving me back a life I didn't want…No one would give me the life I wanted, so I made it myself. I just needed the courage to do it and Fatima" she sighed. "Fatima gave me more courage then I ever had. Only after I left I understood that it wasn't just my life caught in the middle, but everyone's. We all needed to take a step away from Sunnydale and by leaving I let them take that step. And now I'm being punished for it? God!"
"I understand what you did. I understand too well. My life took away my first son when he was just a baby and brought him back to me a revenge thirsty teenager so a few years later he could run away from me. Then Faith was kidnapped by demons when she was nine months pregnant. How do you think I felt when Wesley was born? I just wanted to take him away. Away to Europe or even Tibet in the middle of no where, where no one could find him and take him from me, but I…" Angel stopped.
"You couldn't. You had to stay and fight," Buffy finished his phrase.
"Yes, but it's not just that…I was promised that one day I'll become human if I fight evil that long and win this redemption. I stayed because I want my son to have a real father one day. A father that doesn't have to hide in the darkness," Angel said and Buffy was surprised.
"Human?" she smiled. "If I could count the times I've dreamed of that."
"A million times?" he remembered what she had once said.
"More," Buffy smiled again.
"Why didn't you talk to me until now?" Angel asked.
"I was just…scared you'd be too changed and I'd get freaked," Buffy admitted. "But you know, you're not all that changed. Deep down, under all those smiles and happiness, there's still that broody old Angel I knew," she joked.
"And beyond the angst and despair, you're still the slayer I loved," Angel said. "So you wanna go home now?"
"No, not yet," she looked up at the sky, it was clouded. "So can I have a hug now?" she turned towards the vampire and he smiled. "One of those big comforting hugs."
He hugged her tight to his chest and the slayer sighed. She didn't have to go home. She was already there.
The little boy was sleeping again, but this time, Fatima didn't seem to be around. He was dreaming of an endless green field that spread as far as they eye could see. He felt happy here. It was so peaceful. Suddenly he woke up.
"I wondered why you didn't show up," he said as he looked over at the girl standing on the edge of the bed.
"I wanted to see where you lived," Fatima said. "A hotel. It's pretty. Much bigger then our house."
"Why didn't you tell me you're not in Sunnydale?" the boy asked. He had overhead Wesley's conversation with Cordy on the phone.
"You never asked," Fatima smiled.
"Aren't you suppose to be on your mother's side?" little Wes asked.
"I don't think there are sides," Fatima said.
"There are sides, but you can't see them," the boy sighed.
"I know they're not evil," Fatima looked him straight in the eye.
"How do you know they won't kill your mom?" little Wes asked.
"They won't. They're too good to kill," Fatima protested.
"They killed before why shouldn't they kill again?" the boy asked and Fatima let out and exasperated sigh.
"You're no fun," she said and disappeared.
"And you are?" little Wes asked the darkness, cross.
They got back to LA by morning. When they entered the lobby they found Wesley senior asleep on the couch, a book opened in his lap and Faith, asleep as well, with her head on his shoulder. Faith's eyes fluttered open when she heard the door close behind them.
"Morning," Faith said sleepily.
"Morning to you too," Angel smiled. She had such a cute morning look.
"Did you find her?" Faith asked, not noticing Buffy behind the vampire. Wesley had called Cordy the previous night and found out the slayer had disappeared and Angel had gone looking for her.
"Yup, I'm here," Buffy stepped in front from behind Angel. Wesley opened his eyes too. He took off his glasses and rubbed his tired eyes.
"What were you doing anyway?" Cordy asked.
"Waiting for you. Oh, and I read Faith from John Keats," Wesley said and the group seemed surprised.
"Intellectual fancies?" Gunn faked a british accent.
"Never too late for 'em," Faith said before yawning.
"So what do we do now?" Wesley asked putting his glasses back on.
"I guess we get back on the horse," Cordy said barely holding back a yawn. They didn't get too much sleep in the car.
"I think you should sleep for a while," Buffy dismissed her words. "A tired team isn't a good team."
"Don't worry about us. Ten cups of java and we're back," Gunn said.
"No, really, get some rest," Buffy was determined.
"Are you sure?" Fred asked.
"Yeah, go to sleep," Buffy assured them. "I think she's safe. And this whole root thing, I think I'm the only one who can figure it out. I'll wake you up if I do."
"She is safe," little Wes came downstairs, sleepy. "You're back," he went running into Angel's arms.
"Are you sure?" Buffy looked over at the boy that was now smiling in his father's embrace.
"She seems very happy where she is," little Wes said.
"She came to you again?" Buffy asked this time calmly, not in the hysterical way she had acted the first time.
"She comes to me every night. She won't let me sleep," the boy said.
"How is she, is she good, did she say anything?" Buffy let the questions flow out of her.
"She says she misses you but she doesn't know if she wants to come back. The world is too pretty where she is," little Wes said.
"Next time you see her tell her…tell her I love her and I'll find her and bring her back," Buffy said.
"I will," the boy assured her. The phone suddenly rang.
"Angel Investigations. We help the helpless," Cordy picked up immediately. "Oh, hi. Just a sec. Buffy, it's for you. It's Dawn."
"Dawn? Hi," Buffy took the phone away from Cordy.
"So did you get her back? I was hoping for an ice cream pig out with my favorite niece this afternoon," Dawn answered cheerfully from the other end of the phone.
"Uhm…no, we didn't find her yet, but I'd take you up on that ice cream. I need some cheering up and maybe you can help me out with something," Buffy told her.
"Sure, anything I can do to help," Dawn said worried. "So you'll come over later?"
"How about now?" Buffy suggested.
"Mmm, sure," Dawn said.
"I'll see you then. Bye," Buffy hung up. "I'm gonna go see Dawnie."
"Aren't you gonna sleep?" Angel asked her.
"Nah! I couldn't close an eye. Besides if I would sleep I'd probably get visited by dead slayers and I really don't feel like it today," Buffy said as she headed for the door. "I'll see you guys later. Bye."
"So we're sleeping? Yay!" Cordy stretched. "I think my back is broken forever from that back seat."
"I think a massage is in order before I get you into bed," Gunn told her as he headed upstairs.
"Uhhh, now you're talking," Cordy said cheerfully and followed him upstairs.
"I want a massage too," Fred pouted. "See this is why I should date more."
"I'll give you one," Angel promised. He often did massages, it was like Cordy giving them an aura clean now and then.
"Yay!" Fred cheered and went upstairs.
"Did you eat?" Faith asked Angel.
"Didn't have time," Angel said.
"Nothing screams good morning like a cup of warm blood. Go give Fred her massage and I'll make you one," Faith told him. "Wanna come with me?" she asked her son.
"I think I'll go back to sleep. I hope she won't bother me again. She's upset with me," little Wes said.
"I'll take you to bed then," Angel scooped the boy in his arms and Faith gave him a thankful smile. The vampire and his son disappeared upstairs.
"Well, I think it's time for yet another lemon bath," Wesley said sighing. "Maybe these damn rashes will finally disappear."
"Oh and maybe later you can read me more from Keats," Faith said.
"You liked it?" Wesley was impressed.
"Totally," Faith said smiling before heading for the kitchen to make Angel his warm blood.
After leaving Fred asleep in her room, she had been so tired she had fallen asleep during her massage, Angel looked in on his son and found him asleep as well. He sighed relieved. Buffy seemed to feel better after their conversation and on the way back to LA they had talked about old times and all the adventures they had gone through without each other. It kept her mind off Fatima and somewhat cheered her up. He had told her all about Pylea and how Cordy's dream of becoming a princess had come true, about Wolfram & Hart, Darla and Dru, Holtz, Justine and Connor and how he spent four months underwater. And she had told him about the singing demon Sweet and how Willow had stepped beyond the red line after her lover was killed and how Xander brought her back to them and about the Geek Troika, heaven, hell and George and her time out in Xander's grandparents's house and her time in the New Sunnydale Highschool and the shape shifter. They had talked about everything, while the others slept. The two of them left out two details though. Spike and Cordy and their love.
Angel went downstairs. It was time to drink that warm cup of blood Faith had offered him. As the years passed, his crew seemed to invent new ways of making the blood he drank tastier. They even offered to put some of their own blood in with his regular, but he had refused them. The last person he had drunk from had been Faith and sometimes he still had the urge to bite into her. Sometimes they bought him human blood from the hospital, though he didn't like the idea of drinking the blood some people needed to survive with. So his crew had promised to donate blood any time they bought him any from the hospital. It was a fair trade, that's what they said.
He could feel the smell of blood before he entered the kitchen. It was human blood. They had probably bought him some from the hospital a couple of days ago, that's what he thought, but when he entered the kitchen his eyes went wide. Faith was sitting over the kitchen sink with a knife in her hand and a wrist cut.
"I didn't want to make a mess," she said as she held her bleeding wrist over the sink.
"What are you doing?" he asked as he brutally took the knife away from her throwing it across the kitchen.
"I…I…" she had trouble breathing. "I don't know," she eventually said. "I was just…" she looked over at the bag of blood she had left on the table. "I just woke up with the knife in my hand and it was like someone was telling me to do it…"
"Are you hearing voices?" Angel asked worried.
"No…it was someone," Faith almost broke down into sobs. Angel hugged her.
"It's okay. It's okay, we'll figure this out. I knew something was wrong from the other night," Angel told her. Behind them Dennis was busy poring Angel's blood into a glass.
"Please don't leave me alone again," Faith whimpered.
"I'm here. I won't leave you," Angel said and Faith held on to him even tighter. She was afraid of what she would do to herself.
"Root, root," Dawn repeated the word as they walked down the street. "Sunnydale would be most likely, but if you've been there…"
"I looked everywhere. Home, the old Sunnydale High even the Bronze. Nothing," Buffy said as they stopped on the steps of a building and sat down.
"Maybe it is the root of all slayers," Dawn suggested.
"I don't know. I think this is mostly about me, so it should be my root, not theirs," Buffy said.
"I give up," Dawn said. "Ever thought if it's back here in good ol' LA?"
"Yeah. I was a slayer for a couple of months around here after all. I walked around our old neighborhood a bit before I came to see you. I didn't feel or see a thing," Buffy told her.
"You have to feel something?" Dawn asked.
"Yeah, it's like a voice and this little light. They knew I was going to go to Sunnydale so they sent a message through the voice of the prime slayer, through Tara, that I was looking in the wrong place," Buffy told her.
"God, what I wouldn't give to see her again. Just so I can tell her how much I cared about her," Dawn sighed. Tara had been one of the most amazing and kind people she had ever met. "Buffy?" she asked when she saw her sister was staring off.
Buffy suddenly flashed back into the past and she found herself on the steps of the building she was standing on right then, at the age of 15. How could have she forgotten? She was holding a lollypop in her hand and a man came up to her.
"Buffy Summers?" he asked. She knew what would come next. She flashed back into the present.
"We're here," Buffy said.
"Here where?" Dawn asked confused.
"The root… This is the root, Dawnie. The steps of my old highschool. This is where I was called for the very first time, when I was 15," Buffy told her. "How could I have been so stupid? Of course this was it! The root. Hemery High! The very first time I even heard the word slayer spoken. God!"
She wanted to go up. She wanted to find Fatima, right then, but Dawn put a hand on her shoulder.
"Don't. I don't know if you're ready to fight whatever this thing is. Go get Angel," Dawn said in a commanding voice. "I don't want to lose you again so don't make me kick your ass over there! I've had my share of vampire butt kicking."
Buffy smiled. Her sister was right she had to get Angel and his crew. She was an easy prey without them.
"Soon, my Fatima, soon. I'll come back for you, I promise," she whispered before heading out to Angel Investigations.
End Part 8