-Eggman jumps in-
"You're fat and ugly. Mwahahahahaha!"
-The scene changes to a kitchen-
"There's nothing like being evil and rude in the morning, but do you get the recommended dose of evil in one morning's breakfast? Probably not. That's why I start my morning with 'Destruction Crunch' (made from the people who brought you 'Rice Krispie Crack').
Eggman grinned while pouring a bowl, "Each bowl of Destruction crunch is filled with stabbing-knife marshmallows, sweat from overworked third-world children, shoelaces, and pork (The EVILEST of ALL Meats). Yes, after one bowl of Destruction Crunch, you're guaranteed to feel ten times more evil...maybe."
Remember, it's not evil if it's not from KILLOGGS (this company has no relationship with Kelloggs at all).