Careless
Category: Anime Fairy Tail
Author: MisZ Anarchy
Language: English
Rating: M
Disclaim – Fairy Tail belongs to Hiro Mashima.
Chapter 3 – And how, how careless we could be
"If I lose myself tonight, It'll be by your side"OneRepublic – If I lose Myself
I stare at the screen of my computer, not too sure what the fuck I was doing. I was playing game but my attention was just not on it. I look up at the clock against the wall and sigh. Lisanna would have taken our son to bed by now. I remove my ear phones and rise from my chair.
My feet softly touches the ground as I walk towards my son's room, peeking in at his sleeping form and I smile. He was such a good boy. He would be turning three this year, they grew up so fast. But I don't forget what happened that lead up to this. If it wasn't for him I would not be married right now. I sigh as I shake my head from side to side. I start to move, I can hear a low voice in the bed room, and I figured it might just be Lisanna talking on the phone.
She was off as of lately. I wasn't sure what it was but I had my suspicions. Curiosity getting the better part of me as I take a step closer, and then another step until I am right next to the door and I am listening. I could make out her voice, and that was about it, she was speaking in a hushed tone. At some point she hushed the other person and said that she had heard something but I was quietly standing outside the door listening.
Was she on the phone with her parents? Maybe. They never liked me and probably never will. I strain my ears a bit to listen but still she continued to talk in a hushed voice. I shake my head from side to side not really caring anymore on who she was talking to as I make my way back to my computer.
As I walk I pass our pictures against the walls and I move some of them that are slightly off balance. I stop at one picture and sigh. Her father was a senior officer in the police, he had since retired. Her mother was just another stuck up bitch. I never really saw anything in her parents. I barely even saw my own. Not that my father was ever around. But my mother was and I barely saw her.
The thing about me and Lisanna was, we started our relationship in secret, no one knew, we only saw each other on rare occasions, because I was never good enough for her according to her parents. And I think there was this big fuck up of fooling around when she fell pregnant. We had to come out with our relationship, and it was frowned upon. It could not be true that daddies little angel got pregnant by some mere low life constable in the police. I sigh again as I look at the pictures. And the funniest thing about the whole thing? Her father never believed his daughter was the naughty type. Fuck apparently Lisanna just fell pregnant without even having intercourse. Dear lord, a second baby Jesus? And that is what her parents thought. So we were rushed into an engagement and marriage which I think we were not ready for. And now? Now we are married with a kid.
I sigh again as I walk to my computer and take a seat in front of it. I place my earphones back on and I pull my controller closer. I look to my phone and look over my unread messages. Laxus being one of them, and of course there was a missed call from his ex-girlfriend who I assume is still looking for him, yet I doubt she knew he changed his number. I see I have a message from Erza and I move to open it. 'Did the new girl work with you guys on Saturday?'
I am tempted to answer and say yes, God I wanted to push her buttons so badly because she pissed me off so fucking much lately, and it got worse as we continued to work. But I leave her on 'read' and place my phone face down on the table as I resume my game shutting the world around me off.
"Kill yourself for recognition, Kill yourself to never ever stop" Radiohead – High & Dry
"I think I like her." It took a few minutes for me to register what the hell is being said. I look to Laxus as he is seated across from me, Gray to his side and Jellal to mine. We are currently seated at a coffee shop drinking some coffee just before we finish our day.
"Who?" Jellal asks and we all look towards Laxus who sits back in his chair as he snorts.
"Lucy…" Gray says with a chuckle and at this all four of us laugh.
"Who doesn't like her?" I ask catching myself by surprise. At this the other three start laughing nodding their heads.
"She is rather soft on the eye." Jellal says and I raise a brow.
"Hey! I am the only eligible single here that is allowed to look." Laxus starts and at this we chuckle. "Jellal you have a 'wife'." Laxus says making air comas as he says the word wife. Jellal wasn't married but he had a girlfriend for the last 11 years. "Gray is married to Juvia and Natsu you have Lisanna. So what is really stopping me?" Laxus asks as a matter of fact.
"His name is Chaise and he is a young US marine." Gray states and at that I raise a brow, the US marine that hasn't come to visit since January. I wasn't sure how it was going for them but she never seemed un-happy.
"Well I spoke to her the other day when I gave her a ride…" Laxus trails off as he closely watch us eye him.
"You gave her a ride?" Gray asked in disbelieve and at this Laxus just chuckled.
"Yeah, just to the convenient store to get lunch." Laxus says and how he manages to make it sound so innocent is beyond me. Because I can tell you now that we were not thinking of the same ride as a simple ride to the convenient store.
"The real question is do you have her number?" Jellal ask and at this I chuckle. The girl has been working here for all of four months and not even I have her number, we all are co-workers so it would seem important to have each other's numbers.
"No, but I can get it." Laxus replies taking a sip of his coffee, looking to the table.
"No cheating and asking Gray for her number." I say and at this Gray furrows his brow at me.
"I don't have her number." Gray finally says and at this I am surprised, because I mean what the fuck, those two were close and driving together sometimes, so you want to tell me he doesn't have her number.
"Well fuck." Jellal finally manages to say. "If you are even remotely lucky to get her number and a date, I will buy you a drink." Jellal says and I raise a brow, because Jellal was a stingy fucker who never paid for anything.
"Well that alone says a lot." Gray states and at this we chuckle. I pull my cup closer and swirl my coffee in it. "But that doesn't mean I haven't had similar conversations with her about exactly this." Gray says and at this Laxus looks up but I keep my eyes on my coffee swirling from side to side trying to not seem interested.
"And what did she say?" Laxus asks and at this I look up.
"Let's just say she is happy with Chaise and she would never do anything to jeopardize it, I think that was the main reason she got a divorce in the first place, her husband cheated on her." At this we all go silent. Lucy Heartfelia was married and she had gone through a divorce? What the fuck just happened?
"Spill the beans Gray!" Jellal says as he sits up in his chair and he looks to Gray.
Gray furrows his brows, and it seems he is having an inner battle on whether to tell us or not.
"It's not his story to tell." I finally say a bit surprised on the new bit of information that we received. This was all new to me. Maybe I should pay a bit more attention to the people around me then to be so focused on my own world. "If she wanted any of us to know she would have told us." I continue as I take the last sip of my coffee. Laxus nods his head seemingly understanding the situation as he to takes his final sip of his coffee.
"As I wonder down the avenue so confused, guess I'll try and force a smile" Sam Smith – To Die For
"Natsu!" I hear my name and I turn around as Lucy walks into the boardroom with a broad smile on her lips.
"Miss Heartfelia." I greet dipping my head as I continue to write the arresting statement that I was busy with.
"Already one arrest?" she asks as she plops down next to me and she places her elbows on the table resting her head in her heads.
"Yes." I reply as I continue to write. She hums next to me and then she would look onto the paper I am writing. "Are you bored?" I ask looking at her and my eyes meet hers.
"Nope, just curious." She states with a small smile.
"Curiosity killed the cat." I say and at this she chuckles.
"Well then I am lucky to have 8 more lives." And at this she laughs, she has this contagious laugh and I can't help but smile when I hear it fill the boardroom. She reclines in her chair and stretches a little, her bra strap tumbling down her shoulder and she giggles placing it back.
"Miss Heartfelia, are you feeling sexy today?" I ask as I turn in my chair to look at her. She looks to her shoulder and then she looks to me.
"Wouldn't you like to know Constable Dragneel?" she asks and at this I furrow my brows.
"Do you wear matching underwear?" I ask a bit curious and I raise a brow at the blonde sitting next to me.
"Always." Came her reply and at this I laugh.
"You know what they say about woman who always wear matching underwear?" I ask as I glance out of the window, checking if anyone is near.
"We always down to fuck?" she asks and at this I choke because I did not expect that answer from her at all. I was going to run with it. She smiles to me. "That and sexy underwear makes the person feel sexy and confident." She says and for some reason I imagine my wife in her day to day underwear, nothing ever sexy or edgy, just usual cotton panties and then a bra.
"Well okay then." I manage to say as I look back to the paper I was writing on not sure what I was busy writing. "But with that answer I will take yes as the answer for both me previous questions." I say as I look at the paper in front of me. Trying too hard to pick up where I left off.
"How long have you been married?" comes the most awkward words that I ever hear leave her lips and I look to my side, she has a serious look on her face now as she frowns.
"Well, um…" I sit back to calculate the numbers. "Four years." We were edging to four years soon, well later this month. "And how long have you been with… your guy?" I ask as I gage her emotions and I watch a series of emotions cross her face in that second.
"Going six months now." Came her reply and its softer then she had spoken just now. "He was supposed to come back here in April, sadly that didn't happen. So our next option is when he goes home, then we both get a flight to Las Vegas and visit his parents before his next deployment." She continues and I watch as her eyes wonder around the room.
"Doesn't long distance suck though?" I ask as I turn in my seat and I am fully facing her now.
"To be honest, no." she replies and then she smiles. "I was married before." She continues but she is on her guard as she enters this conversation.
"Oh, really? I didn't know that." I reply trying my best to play dumb.
"You sure? I mean gossip does get around here fast." She asks as she lays out her arms on the table and she gives me this small secret smile.
"I don't entertain gossip." I reply and at this she nods her head.
"Married for five years, got a divorce about a year and a half ago. He cheated on me, and I think that's the only thing I just cannot forgive." She says and then she looks to the other side as we notice people walking to Levy's office.
"I doubt anyone can just forgive that." I find myself saying.
"I heard you had a shotgun wedding." She says as she looks back to me biting her lower lips slightly.
"Here I am telling you I don't entertain gossip, yet you listen to it." I say with a chuckle and her eyes focus on me again and she seems to be slightly ashamed about what I had just said. But I shake my head from side to side. "Yeah, had a secret relationship and one thing lead to the next. I kind of have super sperm." At this she starts laughing and her whole aura lights up as she looks to me shaking her head from side to side.
She slaps her hands on the table as she rises to her feet and she smiles to me as she turns with her ass to the table almost sitting on it. She pulls out her phone and then she swipes at it and then smiles as she looks to me. "Have you seen this?" she asks as she hands me her phone and I take her phone in my hands and look at the screen as she presses play.
I watch some moronic guy trying to make an electric guitar by actually using power and electric cables then he shocks himself half to death. I laugh as I watch the video and I press play again as I shake my head from side to side. I see as she looks to the window and she seems so relaxed as she folds her arms over her chest making her boobs stand out a bit more. I swipe and clear her screen as a brilliant idea comes to mind. I move to her dial screen and I lazily touch the numbers of my phone number.
She looks to me and she frowns as she looks back to me. "What are you doing?" she asks moving a bit closer, now my fingers are moving faster as I press dial for her to call me. Whether or not her number is showing, either she would then have my number or I would have her.
"Just something." I say as I move the phone out of her reach and her eyes go wide as she is unable to get to it. I rise to my feet and continue to move it out of her reach waiting for the call to go through as she pushes against me. The more she moves the more I move until she is pressed against me trying so hard to get her phone from me. Not even sure why she was so worried about me having her phone. My phone starts to ring and we both look to my phone that is still on the desk. I watch as realization kicks in and she huffs a breath of relief out.
But by now I am pressed against the table with her small frame pressing against mine, her perky breasts against my chest and if I dare look down at her now I know all I would be seeing is cleavage. "All this just to get my number?" she finally asks but she doesn't move and I smirk slowly bringing her phone down to where she snatches it out of my hand. "All you could have done was ask, silly." She states after it's safely in her grasp and she pulls away from me, I instantly miss the heat but I feel relieved at the same time.
"Maybe." I say with a chuckle as she moves backwards and plants herself on the chair behind her.
"Idiot!" she says rolling her eyes at me and I finally take a breath, it smells sweet, she smells sweet. "You could have just asked." She says again as she shakes her head from side to side and I finally take my seat. She made me a bit uncomfortable in my groin area and I had to ensure I ignore that.
"Would you have given me your number if I did ask?" I ask turning back to my work on the table.
"Maybe." She huffs.
"What do you have on your phone that you're so worried I might see?" I ask and at this she goes bright red. I think I might know why. "You have porn on your phone?" I ask smirking at her.
"NO!" she almost yells and then she shakes her head from side to side as she pulls her phone to her chest, in between her breasts. "No… But I have other things on my phone that I don't want my co-workers to see." She says and that red hue on her cheeks not going away anytime soon.
"Like what?" I ask as I search for my pen and then I look back to her.
She rolls her eyes as a smirk makes its way onto her lips. "Well… seeing that I am in a long distance relationship…. There might be some compromising pictures..." she trails off and I know exactly what she was talking about.
"Fuck if I knew that you had nudes on there I would have looked for that instead of getting your number." At this her eyes goes wide as she shakes her head from side to side.
"No!" At this I just laugh and shake my head at the woman next to me. "Fuck you." She mutters under her breathe.
"Is that a request or an order? I would oblige either way." I say and at this she continues to shake her head from side to side.
"Natsu… what am I going to do with you…" she asks and I assume that it is a rhetorical question because there was no relevant answer to that. Trouble now touched my skin leaving a longing that lingered…
"Know I'm just as lost as you are, Blame it all on the stars, If it falls apart, it falls apart" Bryce Vine – It Falls Apart
I stand at the tree next to my car as I inhale the smoke from my cigarette. Lucy was something else, and the more I spent time with the petite pretty little blonde the more I understood why Laxus had a liking in her. But I think that we would never cross that imaginary bridge even if we somehow got there. I would be lying if I said I wasn't contemplating doing things with Lucy. But I pushed those thought to the back of my mind.
Things at home has been strange. Lisanna is always in a mood, or her attention just doesn't seem to be with me. She spent more and more time at work then she usually did. And that in itself was suspicious. But I wouldn't question her on that. It wasn't my place.
I look to the side and watch as Lucy walks over to me, there is a big smile on her face as she walks to me. "Hello Natsu." She greets stopping just a few feet from me.
"Someone is in a good mood… Did you get some video sex?" I ask and at this she almost chokes, confirming my suspicion and then she giggles.
"I'm always in a good mood silly." She states as she stands to my side, and a bit more into the sun. She looked like an Eskimo in her jacket but a rather cute sexy Eskimo. "How are you?" she asks and I frown but smile to her.
"I am good and you?" I find myself replying.
"Good. You want some sweets?" she asks pushing her hands into her pockets and pulling out some sweets. I would never say no to anything sweet so I take some from her and start to unwrap the paper, popping the sweet into my mouth.
"So I have a question." I find myself asking as I start to suck on the sweet. She hmms a reply and looks to me, her eyes meeting mine. "Would you ever consider being friends with benefits?" I ask and I want to kick myself for even asking such a thing, but she tilts her head to the side and it seems she is really thinking about this.
"Well, if I wasn't in a relationship with Chaise, then maybe. Play me the scenario." She states and I feel like I entered a subject I should have not opened.
"Well…" I say moving my weight from one foot to another. Not really knowing how I wanted to word this.
"Natsu, come on, we are friends." She states placing her hand on my arm, her eyes boring into mine.
"I was just wondering. But I know you would never cheat on your boyfriend since you have been on the receiving end of it." I say and I feel lost in her eyes. Completely missing the promotion from co-worker to friend that I just got.
"I would never cheat on Chaise. But I think if I was single and the other person was interested in only satisfying their sexual needs in a form of friends with benefits I would agree." She states and I nod my head. "But what if you were that friend… or are you maybe implying you have a friend that is interested in me in such a way?" she asks and I almost choke, knowing full well Laxus liked her, but not in that capacity, he would be in it for a relationship.
"If it was me…" I let slip and at this she narrows her eyes.
"With you it's a different scenario." She replies as she furrows her brows.
"Different in what way?" I ask and she gives a soft smile.
"Your married, would you really be able to go through with it?" she asks and at that moment I wasn't sure what she was implying but I didn't know the answer to that question at all. She could see I didn't know how to answer her, she moves her weight to the other foot and she smiles at me. "Are you attracted to me in such a way?" she asks completely serious and I blink once, twice, not sure if she wanted an answer to that.
"Yes." I find myself saying and at this she smiles a soft smile.
"We will see." She states as she turns on her heel and she walks to the office. Did I really asked her that? Had I really implied to be friends with benefits with her knowing that I am married, and that I was married and she was in a relationship? I guess I did, I just crossed the line and I doubt there was coming back after this.