Chapter 7

Family, Friends, and Fuckery

Naruto wakes to find himself staring at an unfamiliar faded teal ceiling. Yoko's rhythmic breathing against his side keeps him calm and grounded long enough to recall the events of the previous evening. Tears almost instantly came to his eyes. It hadn't been a dream. He actually has a real home now.

After the exam, he and Iruka had gone back to Naruto's apartment to pick up all his things. It only took about five minutes to pack, as Naruto really didn't own much, and they didn't need to bring any of the furniture. That, and Naruto's sealing scrolls made quick work of it. After seeing just how sparse Naruto's wardrobe was, they took a quick trip to get him a new one and a new set of professional kunai, shuriken, and other odds and ends. After that was of course an obligatory stop at Ichiraku's to celebrate before returning home.

Unbeknownst to Naruto, Iruka didn't live here long. When he proposed adopting Naruto to the Hokage, the aging philanthropist offered to give them both Minato and Kushina's old apartment. For now, Iruka only knew this was once Naruto's parents' place, but was not informed of their identities. He knew already, of course. The sly grin he gave Hiruzen made that clear enough without need for words. Iruka knew Kushina and Minato well enough. Not as well as Kakashi, but enough to put the pieces together.

The remainder of their night was spent helping Naruto to set his new bedroom up, and a few hours in the livingroom, chatting late into the night and eagerly discussing training and some of Iruka's more interesting experiences on the field before he became a teacher. A few of those stories even inspired a few more seal and trap designs, some of which left Iruka shivering at the thought of the nightmares he just helped to create.

When it was finally time for Naruto to sleep, he'd passed out within a few minutes with a genuine smile still plastered on his face. Now waking to find it hadn't just been one of the many sweet dreams that have taunted him with the idea of a family and a home only to rip it away, Naruto couldn't possibly be more grateful.

At least, he thought so until he smelt bacon.

He kicked at the air and sprung straight to his feet, only to get tangled in his blanket and trip. He remains faceplanted on the carpet for a few moments until Yoko licks his face. "… Yes, good morning, Yoko. Go to-" He pauses for a moment. "… Go to dad. I'll catch up in a minute." That word… It's still so foreign, but so right. After hearing Yoko trot out of the room, he takes his time untangling himself, then stumbles out to the dining room in his pinstripe pajamas. If only he could have known the world changing moment that took place here, the simple decision made right where he stands that determined so much of his life. For now though, all that mattered to him was the man he now called his father, and his scarred face grinning down to him from beside the table as he dished out a homecooked breakfast.

"Good morning, Naruto. Hope you slept we-" The wind is nearly knocked out of him by another of Naruto's rare, but overpowering hugs. He stares for a moment, but sighs and smiles, kneeling own to hug him in return. He knows better than to speak and ruin this moment. Yoko steps up and circles around them, rubbing against their legs, and providing the last bit of comfort Naruto needs to feel like he's truly home. For the first time in his life… he's home.

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Naruto's attachment to orange was, oddly enough, a fluke caused by his condition as a jinchuuriki and the town's reaction. It was difficult for him to get affordable clothes, so for something durable enough to withstand his training, he had to pick the cheapest option. Of course, it ended up being his "kill me" orange jumpsuit. He got attached to it pretty fast, learning to love the color and adapt it as a part of his personality. It's bold, it's confident, and it's rare to see anyone wearing it for anything but work-risk-related reasons.

Thankfully, Iruka managed to convince Naruto to take up an outfit that uses it far less predominantly.

Naruto stands in front of the mirror to inspect himself. His jacket's been replaced with a deep gray hoodie with burnt orange on the hem, wrists, down the middle along the zipper, and on the entire inner lining. The inside is full of dozens of pockets to easily stash scrolls over scrolls and various extra tools if the pouch on his lower back is compromised. He tops it off with khaki cargo pants, providing him with yet more pockets. His sandals are swapped for similar boots for the sake of the closed toes and stronger soles. As he's inspecting himself, Yoko leaps up into his hood and curls up there. Naruto rolls his eyes and checks that the Uzumaki symbol on his shoulder is still in place, embroidered in his new burnt orange. He knows a larger version of the same is on his back, but Yoko making his hood sag has certainly obscured it. He takes a moment to adjust his headband, then steps out of his room and off to the livingroom. It's empty now, as Iruka's already left ahead of time to speak with the Hokage and get some paperwork done before the team assignments.

Yet another huge change in his life. He knew it was coming, and has for a long time, but it's still so surreal, standing in a livingroom of what's just now become his home, missing the presence of a man he now calls dad, about to go to his last day at the academy. It feels like his entire life has flipped in an instant, and only now is it really sinking in.

But, he doesn't have time to waste thinking about it now. He double checks his pockets and locks up on his way out, stepping out through the eastern shopping district towards the academy. He shoves his hands in his pockets and struggles not to laugh as Yoko pokes her head out and sniffs at his ear, tickling him.

"Hey, Naruto!" He turns to face a familiar bun-haired kunoichi racing up to him. "Wow, that's…" Tenten stumbles to a stop and stares at him for a moment. "... That's a huge improvement. That old orange getup was the second biggest eyesore in town."

"Second only to Gai's green spandex, I know" He sighs and tilts his head aside as Yoko pops out to greet her.

"Oh, hello Yoko!" She coos over the fox and scratches under her chin. She gladly accepts and closes her eyes to fully appreciate it. "So, you two headed to team assignments?"

Naruto grins wildly and punches into his left hand. "Can't wait to show my sensei just what kind of monster he got on his team. I'm gonna blow his mind. And probably blow him up a few times."

Tenten rolls her eyes. "Speaking of which, the shop's running low on exploding tags, and there aren't many in town that know how to make good ones. Can you maybe contribute a few?"

He pauses and thinks that over. "Maybe… One condition, though. You guys provide the ink and paper for the job, and I'll make as many as ya like, in return for a permanent discount."

"Deal!" She grins and pumps her fist into the air. "When can you start?" She's then surrounded by blasts of smoke, fading to reveal ten clones surrounding her. "… O-Oh. Right. Ok, immediately, then." She laughs nervously. "Just follow me back to the store, then. Thanks, Naruto!" She's assailed by a round of simultaneous 'You're welcome's in stereo. He knows how eerie that is to someone not accustomed to this jutsu, right? Shit, he probably doesn't.

"R-Right... well, g-good luck with your team!" She hurries back to the store and waves for the clones to follow, leaving Naruto to make the rest of the walk to the academy in silence. Upon arriving to his classroom, all eyes fall upon him in a matter of seconds.

"… What?"

"Holy shit, he actually did it." Ino stares across the room at him as she slowly rises from her seat. "You actually got rid of the jumpsuit from hell. You actually look like a sane, functional human being for once!"

Naruto scowls, and oddly enough, Yoko pokes her head out beside his to join him. "Yeah, I've gotten enough of that already."

"Eeeeh…" Iruka rubs the back of his neck. "Well… they have a point, Naruto."

"Damnit, you just adopted me, and you already betray me?"

"Adopted?" Kiba peeks up for a moment, blinking in silence as that sets in. "… Damn, man. Congrats! Heh, and my mom was considering doing it herself after all that training ya did with us." He raises a thumb to Iruka. "Good on ya, teach'."

While everyone else takes their turns congratulating the two and turning them red, Sasuke just… stares. He doesn't really hate Naruto anymore. He wouldn't say he likes the blonde nutjob, but he respects him. Now though, all he can feel is a sense of loss and loneliness he thought he'd left behind him years ago. All these years, and he still living alone in the Uchiha compound. He thought he'd always have that in common with Naruto. With that gone, he just doesn't know what to think of him now. He wants to be happy for him, but… he can't.

"Alright, settle down everyone." Iruka waves his students back to their seats, and Naruto follows suit. "To begin, I would like to congratulate all of you for graduating and moving into your careers as shinobi of Konoha!" A round of cheers erupts throughout the room. He lets it peter out before continuing. "Normally, I would tell you all to not take this as permission to slack and become complacent with your current talents. With this class, I don't believe I have to." He grins. "I've watched you all grow from greenhorned runts to living evidence of a bright future for our village. Your talents and demeanors command my attention more than the last few rounds of Chuunin exams, and your potential is beyond what I ever could have expected. I'm sure all of you fully intend to take paths least traveled and forge your own ways to greatness. I hope to see all of you surpass me in the years to come, as now, I have nothing left to teach you." He bows to them, and in return, his students bow to him. Once he's raised himself upright again, he picks a clipboard off his desk and waves it at the graduates. "As such, it's time to meet your new sensei. So, pay close attention for your name, and try to gather with your team once you've heard it." He clears his throat and gets to the list, and for now, many of them mentally check out and think about the road ahead until their names bring them to attention.

"Team 7 is… Uzumaki Naruto!" Naruto perks up and nearly leans over his desk. "Haruno Sakura." Sakura's brow furls, but nobody can be certain exactly why. "and Uchiha Sasuke." Three of them look to one another with a combination of apprehension and curiosity. Months ago, Sakura would have squealed, Sasuke would have barely reacted, and Naruto would have cheered over being with Sakura before lamenting the Uchiha. Since then, Sakura was thoroughly pranked but driven to take her career more seriously, Naruto stopped fawning over her or hating Sasuke on principal, and Sasuke warmed up to the blonde thanks to those blackmail photos, not to mention no longer hating Sakura's recently abandoned fangirl tendencies. They stand on neutral ground. Not a strong foundation, but one with a lot of potential. "Your sensei is Hatake Kakashi." And this piqued Naruto's interest. So the scarecrow's picked him again, huh? This should be fun.

"Team 8 is Hyuuga Hinata…" The heiress raises her head and almost activates her Byakugan with her sheer focus on this moment. "Inuzuka Kiba." The pup and his partner nearly howl as they hop out of their seats, raring to go. After all the pack hunting tactics they've been developing, they can already see exactly what the logic of this team is with only two units. And that would mean the last one is… "and Aburame Shino." Shino pushes his glasses up and his internal hives buzz to life as they feed off the adrenaline rush in his system. "Your sensei is Yuhi Kurenai." Hinata perks up and sighs in relief. Nai-neesan. Thank Kami…

"Team 9 is still in circulation under Maito Gai. Moving on to Team 10, we have Nara Shikamaru-"

The Brainiac raises his head from his desk and cuts him off. "Akamichi Chouji and Yamanaka Ino, we get it. This team was kind of predictable."

Ino chuckles nervously, her left eyebrow twitching. "Yeeeaah, but Shika? Ya didn't have to spoil it like that."

Chouji shrugs as he finishes off his bag of chips. "I saw it coming. He's been kinda touchy lately."

Iruka nods and barely squeaks out some quiet, nervous laughter. Anyone would be if they had Yoshino training them, let alone as a parent. He coughs and composes himself. "W-Well, your sensei is Sarutobi Asuma. I'm sure you won't have any issues with him, Shikamaru. So, now that teams are decided, you should all wait here for your sensei to arrive."

That said, the students break away from their seats and gather with their new teammates. Naruto fistbumps Shikamaru as he passes and gives Hinata a kind and simple smile, which nearly causes her turn red in an instant. Dropping into a seat between Sasuke and Sakura, he props his feet up on the desk and smirks. "So, what do you two think?"

Sakura bites her lip and crosses her arms. "Well, our team's versatile. My genjutsu and potential as a medic once I meet a good teacher for it, your sealing and general unpredictability, not to mention Yoko…" The kit pops her head out of Naruto's hood and yips at her, immediately receiving a light petting on her head. "And Sasuke's a ninjutsu prodigy. We're practically designed to be an all-purpose team with little to no overlap on talents. We have one raw strategy team and one tracking team, so it makes sense to have a more balanced one like us."

"Well said." Sasuke leans over his head, chin propped up on laced fingers. "We just have to hope our sensei is competent enough to handle our range of talents. Otherwise, I don't see us having any strict weaknesses. With Yoko, we even have some tracking potential." She yips again, and Sasuke smirks over to her. "Yes, you're a critical team member too. Maybe more so than Naruto."

"Hey!" The blonde scowls, but by the twitching at the corner of his mouth, it's obviously forced. He's just glad to see Sasuke throwing jokes, if a bit condescending still. Yoko on the other hand turns her nose up and hops out of Naruto's hood, bounding across desks to the back. They soon hear Hinata mumbling in the usual cutesy voice to the kit and doting over her. Naruto just rolls his eyes and smiles softly, leaving them be for now. "So, now the only problem is that our sensei is Kakashi. I've worked with the guy before, and lemme tell ya, real piece of work."

Sakura raises an eyebrow at that, planting her elbow on her desk and propping her cheek on her fist. "What do ya mean by that?"

"He's always late for everything and reads those perverted Icha Icha books constantly, even in public."

Sakura cringes, and her right eye begins to twitch. "Sasuke, you know fire jutsu, right?"

"Burn the books, got it."

"Team Eight!" A woman with deep red eyes and flowing, luscious black hair calls from the door. If not for the lack of tomoe in her eyes, Sasuke could have sworn he was looking at someone of his own clan. Maybe there's some kind of distant relation? Not implausible. Her sense of fashion is a little flashier than his clan ever had, though. That dress almost looks like it's made of bandages. Hinata nearly runs down the stairs to meet with her sensei, with Kiba right behind her and Shino taking his time. As Hinata passes, Yoko leaps from her arms and back onto the desk in front of Team 7.

"Team Ten?" A darker-skinned, bearded man in the usual navy shinobi attire and green flack jacket steps in with his hands deep in his pockets, giving Kurenai a bit more than a passing glance as she leaves with her team. Ino's the first to nearly leap down the stairs, and Shikamaru of course trails behind, dragging his feet. For the next ten minutes, everyone leaves team by team, until only Team Seven remains. Iruka left in the midst of it all to finish up the last of the paperwork for this class, grinning at the thought of that hell Kakashi's tardiness will bring him now.

"… Almost two hours now. Fuck it." Naruto stands and digs into the scrolls in his pockets. "This scarecrow's earned the role of test dummy now."

"Are you sure that's smart, Naruto?" Sakura places her hands on her hips and watches Naruto's preparations closely. She doesn't approve, but she's certainly curious…

"He knows I'm on this team. He knows I'm impatient. He brought this on himself." He unfurls a scroll and starts low, quiet maniacal laughter as he writes out the seal for this morning's mischief.

Ten minutes later, Kakashi opens the classroom door to find a small waterfall of cooking oil falling on his head, only to be soaked up by another seal on the floor beneath him. By the end, the only remaining oil was soaked into Kakashi's hair and clothes. "… I'll admit, this is a new one. Impressive work, Naruto."

The blonde grins from his back-tilted chair, feet propped up on the desk again. "I do my best. Be glad it wasn't the version stocked by Yoko's litterbox."

Kakashi shudders at the thought of that. "Well then. I need to try and wash this out and get some replacement clothes. I'll meet you all on the roof in ten minutes." That said, he makes a half tora handsign and disappears in a puff of smoke.

Sasuke stares for a moment, then shakes his head. And pushes himself up. "Let's go then. By the way, Naruto, can you make a version of that with a more flammable oil?"

His first response is one of Naruto's widest grins. "Who says I don't already have that designed? Getting good oil for that's a little tougher on my budget, though."

By the time they reach the roof, ahead of time actually, Kakashi's already cleaned and proper, seated and awaiting them as he reads his usual Icha Icha. He waves them to the seats, and only puts the book away once they've all gathered. "Well, I suppose we should start with introductions. Naruto already knows me at least a bit, so I guess I won't hold back. My name is Hatake Kakashi, former anbu, one of Konoha's foremost elite jonin, former student of the Yondaime, and veteran of the third war. I enjoy clear breezy nights, light reading to break up a mission, and miso soup. I don't care for sweet foods, can't stand the arrogant and the stupid, and despite loving to read, I've never been too fond of fantasy novels. As for dreams, well, I suppose I haven't had any specific ones in some time. I hope you brats can change that." He waves to Naruto. "You're up, blondie."

Naruto smirks and leans back as he pets the napping fox in his lap. "You already know the name, and I intend to make sure the rest of the world knows Uzumaki Naruto. I enjoy tending to my garden, training with friends to learn new tricks, and Ichiraku ramen, AKA food of the gods. I dislike people who hate what they don't understand, my former landlord, and when my pranks and traps fail. Especially when the failure is in testing and blows up in my face. My dream, as you all know already, is to be Hokage, and protect everyone precious to me in this village." He turns to look at Sakura, and she shrugs accepts the metaphorical podium.

"I'm Haruno Sakura. I enjoy watching storms, the occasional movie marathon on days off, and subtle sweets like umeboshi. I dislike spicy foods, I'm no good at cooking, and I hate the cluelessly obsessed…" She groans and rubs her temples. ".. and helping Kurenai-sensei reign Anko in." Kakashi nearly chuckles at that. "My dream…" She hunches and stares at nothing, but there's an iron will in that stare. "My dream is to prove myself a grand, world-class kunoichi. To prove I'm better than the mess I was before."

Sasuke watches her with what appears to be mild interest, more as though she's all there is to watch, but that's almost akin to rapt attention from him. He huffs and closes his eyes. "I'm Uchiha Sasuke. I enjoy long training sessions and meandering walks through town in the dark to wind down from them, and ripe tomatoes, especially from my clan compound's garden. I can't stand loud, frenetic music, never cared much for sweets either, and all my fangirls in town are the bane of my existence. As consequence though, one of my most cherished possessions is the collection of photos Naruto took of them all running in fear and disgust from one of Naruto's pranks." He manages to smile a bit as he recalls the photos still sitting on his desk back home. "As for dreams… not really a luxury I've had much of. Closest I have to a dream is being rid of all my fangirls for good, somehow, but that's an impossible one apparently. Besides that, I have an ambition to enact justice for my clan and end a certain sick bastard's life…"

While Naruto and Sakura are taken aback by Sasuke's grim tone at the end, Kakashi is hopeful. Justice rather than just killing him or vengeance. Seems those therapy sessions with Inouichi's student are going well. He has to strain not to smile at them. It's been so long since he's seen such a promising team, one he's certain he'll be proud of… given they can pass his final test. "Well, now that we're done with that… I'm afraid I'm going to have to put you all through one more test." At first, he receives a collection of confused stares, but Naruto's slowly overtaken by a predatory grin. "I'm certain you're all going to be incredible shinobi, but I need to see whether you're worthy of being my genin. As such, I want you all to meet me at training ground 3 tomorrow morning, at 9 AM. I'd suggest you all avoid breakfast. You won't want to just lose it all once the test starts…" He almost breaks into a maniacal laugh, but quickly realizes that would be too much, and completely ruin the surprise. For now, he leaves them with a simple shunshin, disappearing without a trace and a faint ring of smoke and dancing leaves in his wake.

Naruto pushes himself to his feet and stretches. "So… You guys wanna celebrate with some Ichiraku's?"

"Hn…" Sasuke pushes himself up with just his knees and keeps his hands in his pockets. "I dunno. Kinda feelin barbecue, actually."

Sakura nearly leaps from her seat. "Oh, that actually sounds really good right now. That place near the Yamanakas' shop, right?"

"Yeah, I could go for that." Naruto chuckles and reaches back to pet Yoko. "How 'bout it, kit?" She yips in agreement and licks his hand. "Alright, let's move!"

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That night finds Naruto seated in Iruka's- now his- livingroom, slowly sinking into the couch as he pets the fox curled up in his lap. Iruka sits across from him, reading an old, faded book with such a broken spine that he's clearly read it a hundred times. As he finishes another chapter and sets it aside, he steps over and plops down next to his adoptive son. "Ya know, I don't think I've ever seen you so quiet for so long. Worried about your test tomorrow?"

Naruto tilts his head back and stares at the ceiling. "Not really… worried. More of just trying to figure out the gimmick. He said he was sure we'd all be incredible, but he wants to be sure we're right to be his genin. What could he mean by that?"

Iruka hums and closes his eyes, leaning back and folding his arms behind his head. "Well… Kakashi's a… complicated man. He has high standards and strong enough convictions to make him a potential Hokage when Hiruzen retires."

"… What can you tell me about his genin team?"

"Hm?" Iruka peeks over to his son and takes in his steely eyes, focused on some imperceptible data floating about in his mind. "Well… I never got to meet anyone from his genin team." He sighs and crosses his arms, sinking deeper into the couch. "Both of them died during the last war. If you'd wanna know anything about them, you'd have to ask Kakashi, Gai, the Hokage, or… well, I know Rin was indirectly related to the Inuzuka clan, and close to Tsume."

Naruto nods and lets that sink in. He still doesn't know just how to deal with this, but he's one step closer to figuring it out. However the test begins will fill in the last few pieces of the puzzle, and then, it's all down to building the right trap…

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"This is absolute bullshit." Naruto growls as he awaits their sensei, staring off into the open field as he sits atop one of the three wooden posts of training ground 3. The worn-down grass and packed dirt is surrounded by the village's usual dense forestry, and the black granite of the KIA monument stands out as a stark reminder, and Naruto's current point of interest. If Kakashi's teammates both died in action, then they're both inscribed on that stone. A reminder as he tests his own team. A way to steel his resolve in their names. Another piece of the puzzle that is the test they now await.

"We should have seen this coming after yesterday." Sakura growls as she channels chakra into a leaf, dew forming on it and gathering into a small puddle at its center. "So did either of you actually listen and not eat before he arrived?"

Sasuke grunts. "Nope. That's just stupid. Even if we lose some of it in whatever this test is gonna be, we still need the energy."

Naruto nods and pulls his legs up onto the post, crossing them and propping himself up on his knees. "Besides, that was a suggestion, not a command. How dumb does he think we are? He should know I wouldn't fall for that! And hell, after all the nasty things I've worked with for my traps and pranks, I doubt he'll be able to make me hurl with anything short of an earth-shattering gut punch."

Sakura shudders and closes her eyes. "I-I still can't believe you could turn into that disgusting of an old man!"

He snickers and grins wildly. "I will cherish that prank for the rest of my life."

"Ditto."

"Seriously, Sasuke?!"

"Well…" All eyes fall upon Kakashi as he appears standing behind the posts a few feet to Naruto's left. "I certainly don't have to worry about you all getting familiar with each other."

Naruto chuckles darkly. "Kakashi-sensei, you of all people should know that one of the most critical parts of pranking a target is studying them and knowing how to make it personal. I take pride in stalking my targets until I can get their schedules down to a T and then turning their whole day on its head in a second."

Kakashi shivers at the thought of that. Usually, shinobi aren't this twisted until they reach jonin. If he weren't so loyal to the village, I'd have to worry about another Orochimaru. He coughs and forces himself back to his senses. "W-Well, let's get to the point, then." He raises a pair of bells. "Your goal for this test will be to retrieve these bells from me before this timer goes off." He sets the timer on the middle post and cranks it to an hour. Those who do will graduate. Seeing as there's only two bells, one of you will be sent back to the academy." He almost smirks at Sakura's slightly unhinged expression, but Sasuke and Naruto change that fast. Sasuke appears to hone in on those bells like a hawk. Even without his family's fabled eyes activated, he can still bore a hole into your soul with that gaze. As for Naruto, he barely manages to suppress the grin forming in the wake of slotting this last piece of the puzzle into place. Well, shit. He's already figured it out. Let's see if he can convince the other two, then. "Come at me with the intent to kill, or you won't lay a finger on me. The test starts… now."

His new students are gone in an instant, off to the trees and seeking potential hiding places and approaches. Kakashi can of course track them all rather easily, save for Naruto, who he needs to actually put some effort into. Little bastard's better at this than he knows. Silence soon falls for a few minutes until a change in the pattern of splashes from the stream behind him catches his attention. He turns to find nothing, but grins at the sight of a light rippling. Misdirection via a skipped pebble. He turns back to find one of Naruto's clones already approaching. He continues to read as his left hand is occupied by Naruto's eclectic combos, first blocking an upwards left hook into his ribs, then an attempted sweep kick at his ankles which he easily steps away from. He ends up stepping back directly into a very wet Yoko, who he catches with a foot beneath her ribs and flings her into Naruto. The clone catches her and replaces himself with a log rigged with a smoke bomb, leaving Kakashi alone in the field. "Huh… not bad so far. So what about the other two?" He dodges a series of shuriken that fly from the woods and pauses as he spots the glint of a few far smaller projectiles among them. He slips between the senbon and chuckles. "Nice trick, and decent aim at that range, but not fast nor numerous enough to catch me."

He ducks to the left in time to avoid a few shuriken thrown by Sasuke as he approaches from the bushes. This directs Kakashi to duck low and towards Sasuke's incoming right knee. He knows all too well that Sasuke's left hand is also reaching for the bells in the process, his right hand for the top of his head. Decent, but- shit! He pivots to the right on his right foot to escape the range of all three strikes, grabbing Sasuke by the back of his shirt and throwing him across the clearing. "Clever little bastard." His eye narrows and focuses on the faintest aura of static around Sasuke. "You upgraded an academy D rank jutsu for parasite killing into a C rank taijutsu enhancement. So what do you call this?"

Sasuke chuckles and shifts back into a basic taijutsu stance, low and fingers spread. "It's called Raiton: Mahiken. (Stunning Fist) Best you learn to respect it!" He rushes in and swings in a flurry of swift jabs, forcing Kakashi to step back and avoid contact at all costs, lest he be stunned by it.

They're all pretty good… but I get the feeling they're all just testing the waters yet. I haven't seen even half their tricks. He leaps back into the bushes and completely disappears from view as Sasuke chases him in. He struggles to track Kakashi down for several moments until a hand grips his ankle and drags him under up to his head. Kakashi then emerges from the ground in front of him with no noticeably displaced soil. He brushes a bit of dirt off himself and smiles down at his student. "A bit overconfident yet. Never believe you have the upper hand just because an opponent is avoiding you." He turns and walks off. "Well, I'm off to find the pinkette. I'll come dig you up later, if Naruto doesn't get you first."

Halfway across the training ground, Sakura kneels on a branch around a third of the way up a particularly large tree, among the leaves, to the point she can barely see out from between them. She focuses on sounds, awaiting footsteps and hidden with a genjutsu that makes her appear as nothing more than the leaves she's among. Of course, she doesn't hear Kakashi approach… but he also is having a bit of difficulty finding her. She's good. Kurenai taught her well. I can feel her general presence here, but there's no visible sign, and she's near silent. I can hear her breathing, and smell her shampoo, but visibly she's practically gone. Well, let's see if she's as good at countering genjutsu as making them. He takes a moment to shift through handsigns and cast a radial genjutsu. Magen: Narakumi no Jutsu. (Hell Viewing Jutsu)

Sakura freezes as she witnesses the wind blowing and leaves twirling. Moments later, she watches as Sasuke stumbles from the trees below and barely into view, several kunai sticking out of him. At this distance the details of his injuries are difficult to make out, but the lack of an arm and the amount of blood cascading from him paints enough of a picture even then. "D-Damnit… why didn't I have… backup?.. My team should have prevented this!"

She stares for a few moments, shivering and closing her eyes to steel herself, but with a quick half tiger sign and a pulse of chakra, she dispels it. "Laying it on a little thick, sensei… Good thing Kurenai-shishou introduced me to that one. One of her favorites..." By then, Kakashi is gone, and satisfied with the results. Now if only they could come together and complete their task. He almost expected otherwise, until he heard two sets of footsteps through the trees headed Sakura's way.

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Kakashi once again stands in the middle of the clearing by the three posts, reading his Icha Icha as he waits for whatever strategy there may be to begin. He felt something underground a short time ago, and that certainly intrigued him, then again, there's two earth users on the team. He tried not to pay too much attention, wanting to be surprised. The start of their combo didn't do much to impress, but that may be for the best. Sasuke approaches from the tree line with his Mahiken active, going for a more rapid and spastic series of strikes that leave many openings, but little opportunity for someone unarmed as Kakashi is, unless he wanted to be shocked. It's easy enough for Kakashi to dodge, until he catches sight of two sets of projectiles from opposite peripherals. Naruto and Sakura have aimed from the trees to assault him from both sides while Sasuke takes the front, giving him only the option to retreat. If he weren't holding back for his students' sake, he would have used his own lightning affinity to counter Sasuke, catch most of the projectiles and throw them back, and they'd all be dead in seconds. Of course, that's elite jonin level combat. For genin, they've already impressed him. For now, he'll see this strategy through.

As they lead him, the trajectory of the projectiles changes consistently, showing that they're both throwing from the trees. He starts to question how there could be so many weapons- until he notices that some of them are popping on impact, with a few real ones dispersed between. Naruto's clones must have produced them. He'll have to remember to teach the boy the Shuriken Kage Bunshin later. Eventually, they guide him to the area he'd felt them tunneling towards earlier. He tracks Sasuke's moves and the projectiles well enough to take a look back and see what he's being led into. Several patches of dirt have been shifted, but sadly, a few corners of surprisingly large paper tags are sticking out and visible. They wouldn't have access to exploding tags yet, and Naruto would know not to resort to something so deadly. Considering the wide spread of them, they probably looked to make a wide enough area to ensure he'd hit one, meaning they must be contact activated or requiring rather than triggered or radial. Deciding not to make things too easy for them, seeing as they slipped up by making the trap so visible, he makes sure to leap back and land in one of the spaces between them.

And that proves to be a potentially fatal mistake. The ground around him shimmers as Sasuke leaps back. The tags seem to shift to new locations, but Kakashi knows quite well now that the original placement was an illusion. Sakura mutters from the trees. "Magen: Koko ni Aruzu no Jutsu: Successful." With the false surroundings of the genjutsu dropped, Kakashi realizes he's directly landed on a large seal, and three smaller ones surround it.

Ooooh. Make the false surroundings appear as believable as possible. Not bad at all. So what are these seals? He attempts to jump from them, but the three outer seals trigger, and he feels gravity grow just a bit stronger there, keeping him from jumping as quickly or as easily, and giving the main seal time to catch him. A cyclone emerges from it beneath him, slowly pushing him into the air, but the gravity seals keep him from shifting laterally, only vertically in the wind. As he takes in his students stepping out to admire their work, he notices Sasuke competing a tiger handsign. Holy shit, they actually produced a lethal combo already. Kakashi is consumed in a flaming tornado, only to pop in a cloud of smoke and drop a pair of now slightly singed bells.

Naruto deactivates the seals and steps up to grab them, while Sakura stares bewildered at the scorched ground. "Wow, we actually beat his clone."

Sasuke grunts and crosses his arms. "He was holding back."

Naruto chuckles as he cleans up the remains of his seals. "Yeah, I'm sure he just wanted to see what we cooked up for him. Right, sensei?" He stands and turns to stare at the real Kakashi now standing near the three posts.

"Not bad, kids. You made a trap. You beat my clone. You got the bells. Although, what was Yoko's role in that combo?"

Naruto chuckles nervously and pets the kit's head, poking out from his partly zipped hoodie, beneath his chin. "She's not much of a direct combatant. Her contribution was to bury the glitter bombs."

"Glitter bo-?" Glitter bursts from shallow earth beneath the posts, showering Kakashi in it and leaving the scarecrow looking quite fabulous.

Two minutes later, he, Sakura, and Sasuke are walking off and waving back to Naruto as he remains tied to the pole with Yoko ignorantly napping in his jacket with her tongue sticking out. "I expect you at training at 8 tomorrow morning, Naruto! Good luck getting out of those ropes! I'll send Iruka in case you don't in two hours or so!" Naruto would reply with a rant that would make a sailor blush, but Kakashi saw fit to gag the blonde as well, treating himself and his other two students to the wonderful sight of Naruto flailing his head and legs about in a desperate attempt to tell them off in whatever nonverbal manner he can.