I had done a lot of thinking. A lot. I drew a lot of my own conclusions about certain things my mom had said in the car.

I hadn't gotten too much sleep, which I realized was becoming a pattern. That was an issue for a later date.

Right now, I was worried about talking to my mom. Last night, I kind of just went in my room. I wasn't in the mood to talk, I needed to process it all for myself.

I knew it upset Mom that I went in my room, but I couldn't help it.

It was about 8 in the morning, so I was surprised when I heard her awake, and talking to someone on the phone.

I'm not one to eavesdrop, but what else was I supposed to do? Just walk in there?

"I think she might be mad at me. Ya know?" My mom asked.

Was she talking about me? Why would I be mad at her?

"No, but... I don't know. I might've taken a little more of the blame than I should have." My mom went quiet and then sighed, "Cal, I don't want her to hate him. He's not a horrible person... he just needs help." Another pause, then, "I know, I know."

'Cal' As in Callie? Callie knew about all of this? I wonder what Mom told her.

"Well, yeah. You're right."

I didn't like only hearing one side of the conversation. What was she right about? Maybe I was eavesdropping. Scratch that, I definitely was eavesdropping. I felt bad- but only a little bit.

Mom and Callie must be really close if Callie knows about Dad. I wasn't even sure if Callie knew anything before this. At least Mom has someone. A person. Someone she can count on. I've always wanted that for her.

"I just hope she isn't pissed at me about it." She laughed sadly, "Well, I kind of made myself look like the bad cop."

No you didn't. I knew none of this was Mom's fault. She did what she had to do.

"I know, it's not my fault." My mom said after some silence.

I couldn't listen to her be so upset any more. I knocked on her bedroom door.

"Oh, hold on." I heard her say, and then she got up, opening the door. "Olive.." She smiled. "One sec honey." She put the phone to her ear, "I'll talk to you later. K, bye!" She hung up and then looked at me. "How are you doing?"

"I'm fine." I hugged her. She needed it. So did I. "I'm not mad at you, you know."

She inhaled.

"I know it's not your fault. You can't control what he chose to do." I pulled away from the hug and looked at her. "I wasn't mad at you last night, either. I just needed some time. I probably should have said that... so you weren't so worried. I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize... it's fine. Totally understandable sweetheart." Mom reassured.

"I know you did what's best for us..." I said quietly. "So, thank you."

Tears immediately filled Mom's eyes.

"No, please don't cry." Sometimes Mom was so emotional.

"Sorry, sorry..." She rubbed her eyes.

"I'm not mad at you." I repeated. I felt bad that she seemed so upset on the phone with Callie.

"I know baby. Thank you." She hugged me again. "Seriously, how are you doing?" She asked.

"I'm fine, really." I already knew almost everything that Mom said. Almost.

She pulled away, looking into my eyes. "I think you know a lot more than you're letting me in on. If you would like to talk about any of it, I am here for you." She spoke sincerely, matter-of-factly.

I nodded a little. She knew, I knew. "I don't want you to get upset..."

"Honey, I'm not upset."

I sighed. "You seem upset."

"I promise you, I'm just fine."

I bit my cheek. "Was that Callie? On the phone?" I knew it was, but I wanted to see what she would say about it.

"Yeah," She smiled. "She was on her way to work, so she called."

"That's nice."

"Yeah, it is nice." She always smiled so big when I brought up Callie.

I nodded and awkwardly went over to her bed, sitting down and glancing over at her. "Do you know where Dad is?" I asked, just wondering.

She shook her head, "No clue."

"Do you think he'll get help?"

A shrug. "I'm not sure. I would hope so. But, I'm really not sure."

I nodded slowly.

"Are you wanting to see him?" Mom tilted her head at me.

"No." I answered, probably a little too quickly.

Mom's eyebrows furrowed.

It was my turn to shrug. "The only different thing since you guys split is where we live."

"Olive..." Mom knew what I meant. Like I said, he was absent.

She sat next to me, choosing to stick to a silent comfort. She just hugged me, rubbing my back.

I wasn't exaggerating when I said that. It may sound silly to some people. Sure, my dad and I sometimes had our very brief moments where we got along and laughed together. But, I could probably count on my hand how often that was. He had spent a lot of his time in our garage.

I didn't really feel like I was 'missing out' any more than I had been several months ago, when we still lived with him.

I would be fine.

I just had to deal with the fact that my Mom had stayed for so long because of me. That was what bothered me most.

And, I know it's not like I could've forced her to leave. But, I wish she hadn't felt... stuck. I hated that. It bothered me on.. a whole new level.