'The Art of War'
"It is the rule in war, if our forces are ten to the enemy's one, to surround him; if five to one, to attack him; if twice as numerous, to divide our army into two."
_____________________
_____________________
The enviorment around him was nothing but a blur of colors that formed a kiladescope tunnel that drove straight towards his destination. If he could just get back to the Tendous, gather his gear, and get the hell out of dodge, he could spend the rest of the month in reclusive training, away from the current level of unbearable insanity. Perhaps after several intense sessions of 'self discovery' in the deepest woods of Japan, he could return no worse for wear.
"RANMA!"
That, of course, was presuming he made it scott free. Almost immidiately following Mousse's voice, Ranma was sacked from the side. From years of training, the blindsiding glomp was easily countered, as Ranma maneuvered his myopic nemeis into a German suplex, and drove him into the rooftop. Instantly, Ranma then twisted from under Mousse, while still holding him down by the head, and punted him into the distance. Without another thought, Ranma then continued his mad dash for sanctuary, intent on-
Ranma leap a meter into the air, avoiding a dive tackling Shampoo. He landed hard on her back, and spun tightly, before continuing.
-nothing bu avoiding every single female association, as well as one or two male associations. Even Mr. Ninomiya was in on-
"RANMAAAAA!!!"
-it! Ranma leapt across the gap between rooftops, fighting the urge to look down at the raven haired girl with her open trenchcoat. He wasn't sure what was suddenly going on, or who was behind it. Truth be told, he couldn't be bothered to think about it, since his mind seemed to be rather preoccupied. The lithe, supple body of Kodachi, the strong, muscular frame of Akane, the soft, cushiony form of Shampoo, the timid, womanly countenance of Kasumi, the pert, shapely figure of Nabiki, the volumptuous, matured design of Hinako, the firm, toned build of Mousse...
Ranma stopped, wondering how the hell that thought got into there. Slamming his fist into his jaw, Ranma dislodged the disturbing image efficiently, and braced to run.
"Ranma, I thought friends were supposed to trust one another!"
He decided to skip bracing, and run away almost hysterically. Ukyo frowned at Ranma's rapidly disappearing form, before estimating his destination.
_____________________
_____________________
"If you are anxious to fight, you should not go to meet the invader near a river which he has to cross"
_____________________
_____________________
Ranma didn't even bother to check to ensure his window was open, and then couldn't be bothered to pick out the glass shards from his head, as he rapidly gathered his pack, and began to quickly stuff clothing into it. He wouldn't have much time, before...
"Ranmaaa?"
After he finished cycling every swear word he had ever encountered through his mind, he looked up a Nabiki with a sickly smile, "Ah... going on a training trip, don't wait up!" He almost frowned at the sight of the middle Tendou sister; haphazard clothing revealing her pastel purple bra underneith a tight white tshirt, hair in disarray, and short shorts only partially zipped up. Ranma smacked himself several times at chestnut speed to regain his sensibility.
"It hurts Ranma!" Nabiki moaned, before bringing an amber bottle to her mouth, and taking a healthy swig, "It hurts!"
Ranma's concern began to override his sense of self preservation, "What hurts?"
"You durned me down, Ranma, and you hurt me, I want you to make the pain go away!"
"Um... pass that by me once more again?" Ranma requested, walking up to Nabiki, and taking the bottle from her hand, "Hey, isn't this your dad's beer?" Nabiki nodded happily, before her face grew miserable again.
Ranma favored her with a peculiar stare, "um... how many of these had you had?"
"Um... three?" Nabiki replied, holding up six fingers. She then thought about it, and checked her watch. After having difficulty reading it, She handed her wrist over to Ranma, "What does it say?"
"Uh, Two-forty," Ranma answered, checking the time for her.
Nabiki nodded, " Three beers in... um... what's five minutes ago?"
"Two Thirty-five."
Nabiki nodded again, giggling, "Three in five minutes."
"Then, maybe you should lay down, or something?" Ranma suggested, understanding exactly how drunk the girl now was.
Nabiki's expression grew somber, "You're right, Ranma." She then collapsed into the pigtailed boy's arms, tumbling them both to the floor, and waved her tongue frantically before Ranma's tight-lipped mouth. Ranma would have then voiced his desire that Nabiki remove her gyrating person from on top of him, but her seige was great.
"NABIKI!"
Fortunately, reinforcements arrived before the walls crumbled under the nearly unstoppable onslaught. Kasumi quickly rushed towards the downed two, and pulled a nearly limp Nabiki from the pigtailed boy, "That's just how a proper lady should ac... are you drunk?"
"Nnnooo, are you?" Nabiki asked, before her head slumped. Kasumi sighed, and turned to find Ranma huddled in the corner, hyperventalating.
"I'm sorry Ranma, I really am," Kasumi apologised, before shifting herself to drag her swooning sister from the room. She came back several moments later, still wearing her apologetic smile, and dusting off her hands. "I wish I had warned you about Nabiki after she's been drinking. I'm afraid she's hardly herself."
Ranma nodded, still attempting to get his breathing under control.
Kasumi frowned further, "Ranma, maybe you should lay down for a bit," Kasumi approached the pigtailed martial artist, not even getting a reaction from him. She was able to coax him towards his futon, "Here you go, Ranma, a nice comfortable bed. Why don't you lay on your stomach and I'll help you relax."
Ranma didn't even register what she was saying, as he laid down, as his mind had ceased up in order to protect his innocence. Staring blankly forward, he didn't notice or register Kasumi's hands gripping into his back, gently kneading.
The eldest Tendou daughter grit her teeth, as she attempted to massage Ranma's tense muscles; she would have better luck massaging iron ore. "Oh... ugh... Ranma... you're so tense!"
Nonetheless, Kasumi continued to work like the dilligent, determined, future housewife she was, until the utter futility finally registered with her. "oh my, I guess we will have to try to relax you another way..." Ranma continued to stare forward, not even curious to the sound of cloth being unraveled. "Just give me a moment, Ranma."
"RANMA-HUN, BUT IT'S ONLY NATURAL FOR TWO FRIENDS TO-"
"RANMA NOW LEARN MANS PLACE IS BETWEEN WOMANS-"
Ukyo stopped at the threshold, as Shampoo paused from climbing into the window, both dumbstruck at the sight before them. Without a change in their incredulous expressions or positioning, both girls began to glow purple.
"Um..." Kasumi neatly wrapped her breastbindings that were halfway unraveled, and calmly closed her kimono, "Hello, I didn't know we were expecting guests..." Cautiously, she unstraddled Ranma's butt, and slowly backed towards the part of the room furthest from both girls. Her ever present serene smile was plastered pleasantly across her face, enhanced by the tiny beads of persperation trailing down her face.
Both girls began emitting deep growls, before, as one, they both began to approach Kasumi.
"SHAMPO-ER... RANMA!"
The pigtailed boy came to, just in time to see Ukyo suddenly ensnared in a swarm of chains, and crash to the floor, before Mousse rushed in, and latched onto Kasumi like a barnacle.
"Mousse?" Shampoo whispered, wondering exactly what he was doing amidst this, before she quickly shook the throught from her head that would prove dangerously disturbing. "No! Shampoo think happy thoughts, happy thoughts! La la la la..."
"O...Ohmy..." Kasumi gasped, unable to break the strangling hold.
Ranma snapped to, taking his enviorment in, and spying four of his currently most dangerous opponents. With those odds, he knew the best technique for the situation.
Ranma made a mad dash for the door, and turned to launch himself down the stairs. He came to an abrupt stop, and screamed, as he saw a *very* angry Akane stalking up the stairs. As she spotted him, she quickly picked up her pace.
Desperate Ranma turned to the first door available, and rushed into the room. He froze, spying a bound and gagged Nabiki, thrashing and moaning against the jumprope, cloth belt, and leather straps that held her almost mummified on her bed.
Ranma realized at that moment, the helpless look seemed pretty damn sexy.
His brain fuzzed over, as he mechanically began to step forward, completely lost. His fortune came, as he was suddenly saved; bumrushed from behind and slammed into the floor.
Nabiki's wide eyes followed both Akane and Ranma to the ground, before she began thrashing again. Ranma attempted to scramble to his feet, before finding himself face to currently covered chest with Akane.
"TAKE A GOOD, HARD LOOK, YOU DAMN PERVERT!!!" Akane shouted, throwing her trenchcoat open.
In reflex born of a lifetime of training, Ranma quickly covered his face and shouted, "YOUR THIGHS ARE AS WIDE AS A FREEWAY!!!"
"YOU JERK!!!" punctuated Akane's uppercut, as she launched the pigtailed boy into the ceiling. From her position and the angle, she wasn't able to gain the sufficient power to put him completely through he roof. it was also stifled by the sudden sensation Akane felt, as Ranma's ascent caused him to brush against a sensitive part of her. She will make a mental note in the future not to send Ranma flying while straddling him.
Ranma tried his best not to think about what he suspected he brushed against, as his head managed to punch through the roof. Turning, he found himself staring at Pantyhose Tarou, who blinked back at the pigtailed martial artist owlishly. Surprise was replace by a haughty smirk, as he turned while still sitting in lotus position to face Ranma, pulling the headset from his mouth and ears, "Well well, if it isn't the bounty of this little competition."
"Huh? What comp-" Ranma began to enquire, before a spine chilling laughter caught his attention. Deciding he had better things to do, like run away, Ranma forcefully pulled himself all the way through the roof, and picked a random direction to jump towards.
He landed in an alley, frantically scanning his surroundings like scared crapless bunny.
"Tell me... delinquent..." Ranma's spine rolled, both from the surprise, and the oh-so delicious way the word 'delinquent' was spoken. Knowing she had his attention, Hinako strolled up to the frozen young man's back, and pressed herself against it, "Do you think my dress is too small? Should I take it off?"
"It is the rule in war, if our forces are ten to the enemy's one, to surround him; if five to one, to attack him; if twice as numerous, to divide our army into two."
_____________________
_____________________
The enviorment around him was nothing but a blur of colors that formed a kiladescope tunnel that drove straight towards his destination. If he could just get back to the Tendous, gather his gear, and get the hell out of dodge, he could spend the rest of the month in reclusive training, away from the current level of unbearable insanity. Perhaps after several intense sessions of 'self discovery' in the deepest woods of Japan, he could return no worse for wear.
"RANMA!"
That, of course, was presuming he made it scott free. Almost immidiately following Mousse's voice, Ranma was sacked from the side. From years of training, the blindsiding glomp was easily countered, as Ranma maneuvered his myopic nemeis into a German suplex, and drove him into the rooftop. Instantly, Ranma then twisted from under Mousse, while still holding him down by the head, and punted him into the distance. Without another thought, Ranma then continued his mad dash for sanctuary, intent on-
Ranma leap a meter into the air, avoiding a dive tackling Shampoo. He landed hard on her back, and spun tightly, before continuing.
-nothing bu avoiding every single female association, as well as one or two male associations. Even Mr. Ninomiya was in on-
"RANMAAAAA!!!"
-it! Ranma leapt across the gap between rooftops, fighting the urge to look down at the raven haired girl with her open trenchcoat. He wasn't sure what was suddenly going on, or who was behind it. Truth be told, he couldn't be bothered to think about it, since his mind seemed to be rather preoccupied. The lithe, supple body of Kodachi, the strong, muscular frame of Akane, the soft, cushiony form of Shampoo, the timid, womanly countenance of Kasumi, the pert, shapely figure of Nabiki, the volumptuous, matured design of Hinako, the firm, toned build of Mousse...
Ranma stopped, wondering how the hell that thought got into there. Slamming his fist into his jaw, Ranma dislodged the disturbing image efficiently, and braced to run.
"Ranma, I thought friends were supposed to trust one another!"
He decided to skip bracing, and run away almost hysterically. Ukyo frowned at Ranma's rapidly disappearing form, before estimating his destination.
_____________________
_____________________
"If you are anxious to fight, you should not go to meet the invader near a river which he has to cross"
_____________________
_____________________
Ranma didn't even bother to check to ensure his window was open, and then couldn't be bothered to pick out the glass shards from his head, as he rapidly gathered his pack, and began to quickly stuff clothing into it. He wouldn't have much time, before...
"Ranmaaa?"
After he finished cycling every swear word he had ever encountered through his mind, he looked up a Nabiki with a sickly smile, "Ah... going on a training trip, don't wait up!" He almost frowned at the sight of the middle Tendou sister; haphazard clothing revealing her pastel purple bra underneith a tight white tshirt, hair in disarray, and short shorts only partially zipped up. Ranma smacked himself several times at chestnut speed to regain his sensibility.
"It hurts Ranma!" Nabiki moaned, before bringing an amber bottle to her mouth, and taking a healthy swig, "It hurts!"
Ranma's concern began to override his sense of self preservation, "What hurts?"
"You durned me down, Ranma, and you hurt me, I want you to make the pain go away!"
"Um... pass that by me once more again?" Ranma requested, walking up to Nabiki, and taking the bottle from her hand, "Hey, isn't this your dad's beer?" Nabiki nodded happily, before her face grew miserable again.
Ranma favored her with a peculiar stare, "um... how many of these had you had?"
"Um... three?" Nabiki replied, holding up six fingers. She then thought about it, and checked her watch. After having difficulty reading it, She handed her wrist over to Ranma, "What does it say?"
"Uh, Two-forty," Ranma answered, checking the time for her.
Nabiki nodded, " Three beers in... um... what's five minutes ago?"
"Two Thirty-five."
Nabiki nodded again, giggling, "Three in five minutes."
"Then, maybe you should lay down, or something?" Ranma suggested, understanding exactly how drunk the girl now was.
Nabiki's expression grew somber, "You're right, Ranma." She then collapsed into the pigtailed boy's arms, tumbling them both to the floor, and waved her tongue frantically before Ranma's tight-lipped mouth. Ranma would have then voiced his desire that Nabiki remove her gyrating person from on top of him, but her seige was great.
"NABIKI!"
Fortunately, reinforcements arrived before the walls crumbled under the nearly unstoppable onslaught. Kasumi quickly rushed towards the downed two, and pulled a nearly limp Nabiki from the pigtailed boy, "That's just how a proper lady should ac... are you drunk?"
"Nnnooo, are you?" Nabiki asked, before her head slumped. Kasumi sighed, and turned to find Ranma huddled in the corner, hyperventalating.
"I'm sorry Ranma, I really am," Kasumi apologised, before shifting herself to drag her swooning sister from the room. She came back several moments later, still wearing her apologetic smile, and dusting off her hands. "I wish I had warned you about Nabiki after she's been drinking. I'm afraid she's hardly herself."
Ranma nodded, still attempting to get his breathing under control.
Kasumi frowned further, "Ranma, maybe you should lay down for a bit," Kasumi approached the pigtailed martial artist, not even getting a reaction from him. She was able to coax him towards his futon, "Here you go, Ranma, a nice comfortable bed. Why don't you lay on your stomach and I'll help you relax."
Ranma didn't even register what she was saying, as he laid down, as his mind had ceased up in order to protect his innocence. Staring blankly forward, he didn't notice or register Kasumi's hands gripping into his back, gently kneading.
The eldest Tendou daughter grit her teeth, as she attempted to massage Ranma's tense muscles; she would have better luck massaging iron ore. "Oh... ugh... Ranma... you're so tense!"
Nonetheless, Kasumi continued to work like the dilligent, determined, future housewife she was, until the utter futility finally registered with her. "oh my, I guess we will have to try to relax you another way..." Ranma continued to stare forward, not even curious to the sound of cloth being unraveled. "Just give me a moment, Ranma."
"RANMA-HUN, BUT IT'S ONLY NATURAL FOR TWO FRIENDS TO-"
"RANMA NOW LEARN MANS PLACE IS BETWEEN WOMANS-"
Ukyo stopped at the threshold, as Shampoo paused from climbing into the window, both dumbstruck at the sight before them. Without a change in their incredulous expressions or positioning, both girls began to glow purple.
"Um..." Kasumi neatly wrapped her breastbindings that were halfway unraveled, and calmly closed her kimono, "Hello, I didn't know we were expecting guests..." Cautiously, she unstraddled Ranma's butt, and slowly backed towards the part of the room furthest from both girls. Her ever present serene smile was plastered pleasantly across her face, enhanced by the tiny beads of persperation trailing down her face.
Both girls began emitting deep growls, before, as one, they both began to approach Kasumi.
"SHAMPO-ER... RANMA!"
The pigtailed boy came to, just in time to see Ukyo suddenly ensnared in a swarm of chains, and crash to the floor, before Mousse rushed in, and latched onto Kasumi like a barnacle.
"Mousse?" Shampoo whispered, wondering exactly what he was doing amidst this, before she quickly shook the throught from her head that would prove dangerously disturbing. "No! Shampoo think happy thoughts, happy thoughts! La la la la..."
"O...Ohmy..." Kasumi gasped, unable to break the strangling hold.
Ranma snapped to, taking his enviorment in, and spying four of his currently most dangerous opponents. With those odds, he knew the best technique for the situation.
Ranma made a mad dash for the door, and turned to launch himself down the stairs. He came to an abrupt stop, and screamed, as he saw a *very* angry Akane stalking up the stairs. As she spotted him, she quickly picked up her pace.
Desperate Ranma turned to the first door available, and rushed into the room. He froze, spying a bound and gagged Nabiki, thrashing and moaning against the jumprope, cloth belt, and leather straps that held her almost mummified on her bed.
Ranma realized at that moment, the helpless look seemed pretty damn sexy.
His brain fuzzed over, as he mechanically began to step forward, completely lost. His fortune came, as he was suddenly saved; bumrushed from behind and slammed into the floor.
Nabiki's wide eyes followed both Akane and Ranma to the ground, before she began thrashing again. Ranma attempted to scramble to his feet, before finding himself face to currently covered chest with Akane.
"TAKE A GOOD, HARD LOOK, YOU DAMN PERVERT!!!" Akane shouted, throwing her trenchcoat open.
In reflex born of a lifetime of training, Ranma quickly covered his face and shouted, "YOUR THIGHS ARE AS WIDE AS A FREEWAY!!!"
"YOU JERK!!!" punctuated Akane's uppercut, as she launched the pigtailed boy into the ceiling. From her position and the angle, she wasn't able to gain the sufficient power to put him completely through he roof. it was also stifled by the sudden sensation Akane felt, as Ranma's ascent caused him to brush against a sensitive part of her. She will make a mental note in the future not to send Ranma flying while straddling him.
Ranma tried his best not to think about what he suspected he brushed against, as his head managed to punch through the roof. Turning, he found himself staring at Pantyhose Tarou, who blinked back at the pigtailed martial artist owlishly. Surprise was replace by a haughty smirk, as he turned while still sitting in lotus position to face Ranma, pulling the headset from his mouth and ears, "Well well, if it isn't the bounty of this little competition."
"Huh? What comp-" Ranma began to enquire, before a spine chilling laughter caught his attention. Deciding he had better things to do, like run away, Ranma forcefully pulled himself all the way through the roof, and picked a random direction to jump towards.
He landed in an alley, frantically scanning his surroundings like scared crapless bunny.
"Tell me... delinquent..." Ranma's spine rolled, both from the surprise, and the oh-so delicious way the word 'delinquent' was spoken. Knowing she had his attention, Hinako strolled up to the frozen young man's back, and pressed herself against it, "Do you think my dress is too small? Should I take it off?"