Over the past week, I've learned one thing. Well, one important thing.

When moving in with someone else, finances are a big deal.

Like... a really big deal. I don't know, I just figured it wasn't that important. It is.

It is very clear that Callie is pretty wealthy. At least, to me it is.

She's definitely a lot more wealthy than us. I'm saying this as a fact. Not in a rude way. She has a higher paying job, she lives on her own- she doesn't have to support a child, like Mom does. It is a fact.

I don't think Mom wants to see that fact, though.

She seems to get awkward about finances. Defensive. Uncomfortable. I remembered what she said about their big argument- feeling like she needed to prove something.

But, it has been months, and I figured this was different. We were moving in with Callie. She had to wrap her head around the fact that Callie worked a higher paying job. I didn't get the big deal.

I was laying on the couch- Callie and Mom were in the kitchen, hunched over Mom's laptop and looking at apartments. Like always.

They had decided that they would figure out what would actually work- price, size, location, all of that stuff. Then all three of us would go see them and ultimately choose what would be best. It made sense. I was fine with it. I didn't think I would have too much of a preference, anyway, though. Whatever they liked was fine. It wasn't like I expected to have a final say- and I didn't really want a final say. Too much pressure. Plus, it wasn't like I was meant to have a choice- I was a kid- no matter what, I would have to live with Mom.

"I really love this one, still." I heard Callie say. "The island in the kitchen is beautiful. And it's so open. The fact that there is a community pool and a gym gives mega bonus points, in my opinion."

Mom let out a sigh. "But the price. How would that work?"

"It's affordable." Callie said simply.

"You and I have two very different ideas of affordable." Mom replied, her voice a little harsh.

I bit my cheek. I didn't want it to turn into a fight. The idea of yelling and hostility made my heart speed up.

I had a feeling it might turn into a fight. Again- Mom gets defensive and uncomfortable talking about money. She was the one who brought it up, though.

"Yeah, well we also have two very different incomes, Arizona." Callie snapped back.

Mom went quiet.

Callie sighed, "It's just... I need you to accept that. Me putting a certain percentage of my paycheck towards rent is going to be different than you putting that same percentage. There's no problem with that."

"There is a problem, though, you'd be contributing more." Mom remarked.

Now I could really sense an argument. I squeezed my eyes shut, as if that would stop it. They never argued. Unless it was about this, apparently. The arguing reminded me of Dad. I didn't want to be reminded of Dad.

"Not really, though. It's the same percent- yeah, the numbers may be different, but that really doesn't matter." Callie was trying to get Mom to stop being so defensive. But, she was starting to get annoyed.

Mom didn't say anything.

"We can definitely afford this, Arizona. I think we should put it on the list to look at." Callie said after a while.

"But-"

Callie cut Mom off, "Together it is something we can afford. Don't overthink it too much."

"It isn't together if you are paying a significantly higher amount." Mom's voice was overly defensive.

Please don't argue. I didn't think I could handle it right now. I didn't know why. I just felt so incredibly nervous.

I silently slipped away into my room, sitting next to the door, leaving it a crack opened.

My instincts set in and I had to listen. To make sure Mom was ok. But, I couldn't be out there.

I had to remind myself that this was Mom and Callie.

Not Mom and Dad.

Mom and Callie were good. They loved each other.

It was hard, though. I couldn't get out of my own head.

"I don't get why you're being so stubborn, Arizona. It's really not as big of a deal as you're making it."

"It's a big deal to me, Callie." Mom snapped.

"Why?!" Callie's voice was a little louder.

There was a pause.

I could feel my heart fluttering. I didn't know why I felt so scared. I knew nothing bad would happen. They were barely even yelling.

They were just upset... not angry. They didn't have bad intentions.

I tried to breathe deeper, to calm myself down.

My chest hurt.

My eyes were filling with tears.

All things I couldn't control.

I wished I could. It felt so silly to feel so scared. Nothing bad is happening.

It's Mom and Callie. Not Mom and Dad.

I kept silently repeating that this was different. Trying to reassure myself.

"Maybe we should be done for the day." Mom said finally.

"You can't answer me?" Callie asked.

My deep breathing had turned to panicked breathing.

"Please." Mom spoke more softly, less defensive.

Callie let out a sigh. "Let's... stop. We've looked at enough places today." She said after a beat.

I heard Mom's laptop close. "Yeah... I think we need a break" Mom agreed.

Their voices weren't angry. They weren't mad.

Nothing bad is going to happen.

It was Mom and Callie. They love each other.

I tried to focus on calming myself down. I had gotten way too worked up.

I stood up, looking in the small mirror on my nightstand. My cheeks were pink. I felt hot. Like I was overheating. I was in a t-shirt, though.

I pulled my hair back, hoping that would help.

I wasn't sure what had gotten into me.

I wasn't scared of Mom or Callie. Why did I feel so afraid?