A Shattered Demon Child

Part 2

As Naruto ran away from Kakashi and his clones, he felt his heart pounding in his chest even harder than before. How did they know? Did they know about his habits? How long had they been onto him? This was a mess and Naruto figured it was going to take a lot to make this go away, if it would go away. Naruto only knew that he needed to run for his life because he wasn't sure if he could live with them knowing anything about what was really going on.

Dammit, if they find out, they'll destroy everything I've been trying to preserve and keep together. How could they just do this? I don't even know what to do at this point besides run like my life depends on it, Naruto thought to himself with panic still coursing through his very being.

He wasn't sure if they were going to leave him alone or not, but he knew he needed to get far away from them if he were going to hide and figure out what he was going to do. Before he knew it, he heard snarls and growls from something that was definitely not human under the trees he used to stay off the ground. He knew those noises; Kakashi sent his hounds after him. Naruto cursed as he tried to throw kunai at the beasts as they ran beneath him. He stumbled shortly after he throw them. He fell about ten feet before hitting the ground. He got up slowly and realized the hounds were surrounding him. He was trapped, for the third time that morning. He stood, paralyzed by fear as he wasn't sure what they were going to do to him or if they were going to tell Kakashi where he was.

Naruto summoned ten clones to take care of the hounds, but that's when he felt the exhaustion start to put a hole in his plan of running away from the beasts. He let the clones have at the hounds for a few seconds, but when he got up a tree, the clones were gone. The hounds were already trying to get up the tree to catch him. Naruto started jumping from tree to tree once again, trying to out run the beasts. He knew Kakashi and Iruka were probably on his trail by that point. As he carried on for a while, he soon realized there was a stream ahead that was wider than he could possibly cross with the little bit of energy he had left. He then saw a tree with a hole under it that looked hallow and deep. Naruto lunged into the hole, sliding down the four foot deep hole. Naruto watched from the hole as the hounds dug and scratched at him.

Naruto felt the fear rushing once again. He wasn't sure what to do, so he did the one thing that he knew would make him calm down. He took out another kunai and rolled up his sleeve. He began to assault the still wounded flesh that had barely healed from the night before. When the blade went across his skin, he forgot that there was a limit on how hard he could cut in what area. He accidentally hit a vein before he knew it. At first, he thought the bleeding was a bit much, but he realized his mistake as the pain and blood sunk into his head.

Naruto cursed and pulled his sleeve up as the hounds stopped digging. They started to whimper. He blocked out the voices of the dogs as the tried talking to him. Naruto felt darkness start slipping over him as time passed like seconds. His eyes closed for what seemed like a second before he felt himself waking up to someone pulling his body out of the hole. He saw two blurry figures above him as he finally was pulled out of the hole.

"Naruto? Can you hear me?" a voice, Iruka, asked.

Naruto limply nodded. Kakashi looked at Iruka and said, "He hit a vein. We need to take him to the hospital."

Naruto shook his head and said weakly, "Please, don't do that. Anything but that."

After that, Kakashi gently grabbed Naruto's arm and pushed his bloody sleeve up his arm a bit more than it already was.

"Wait... How is it healing?" Kakashi asked.

Naruto heard a voice in his head say, Idiot. You're not getting it, are you?

The blonde blinked as the pain and wound were soon gone in a matter of moments. Iruka said, "We still need to take you to the hospital."

Kakashi shook his head. "No, not yet, anyway."

Iruka looked shocked. Kakashi looked at the young boy and asked, "Did you do it on accident?"

Naruto nodded limply. "I didn't mean for it to go that deep. I swear."

Kakashi said gently, "Naruto, I believe you. However, understand that you have questions to answer."

"What're you gonna do?"

Kakashi sighed. "For now, we're going to your apartment to talk. Just relax, okay?"

Naruto felt the anxiety again and started shaking. Kakashi put his arm under his knees and behind his back to lift him up. Iruka lead the way, looking more concerned then Naruto had ever seen him before. As they raced to his apartment, Naruto noticed that Kakashi's eyes looked more grim that usual. Naruto noticed the darkness surrounding his vision as they rushed him away from where they'd found him. When his eyes opened again, there was a light above his head. Naruto noticed the feeling of his bed under him and he noticed Kakashi and Iruka both standing nearby, watching him closely.

Naruto slowly sat up and looked at them, ready to be yelled at and scolded. Iruka walked over first. He sat on the edge of Naruto's bed and said, "Hey."

Naruto gulped. "H-Hey."

Iruka put a familiar object on Naruto's lap. A bloody kunai. Naruto knew where it came from. He looked at the weapon and back up to Iruka. Iruka looked tired and conflicted. He asked, "Can you answer some questions for us, please?"

Naruto nodded silently. Iruka cleared his throat as Kakashi walked over and stood a few feet away from Iruka as he leaned against the wall to Naruto's right. Iruka asked quietly, "How long?"

Naruto answered simply, "A long time."

Iruka said impatiently, "I need specifics."

The boy admitted, "Since I started at the academy."

Iruka flinched and Kakashi looked shocked. Both men were now extremely cautious, but Naruto seemed to be static. Iruka asked, "Why did you say nothing about it?"

Naruto said quietly, "I didn't want anyone to know. Until today, nobody knew."

Iruka looked ready to start crying and Kakashi watched his student with a pained look in his eye. Kakashi walked forward and knelt down in front of where the boy was. He asked, "Can I take a look?"

Naruto crossed his arms to his chest and pulled up his knees. He felt like a child being picked on by other children, but he knew they were just trying to help. He reluctantly held his arm out towards the white-haired man. Kakashi gently moved the boy's blood stained sleeve up his arm again. The blood was still there, but Kakashi pulled out an antiseptic wipe from what looked like a medical pack in his pocket. He rubbed at the blood until there was nothing left but Naruto's abused skin.

Iruka and Kakashi went from the boy's wrist up his arm with their eyes. Kakashi asked, "Anywhere else?"

Naruto sighed and took his jacket off nervously. When he did, Kakashi and Iruka both stared at the faint and almost invisible scars that went up Naruto's arms. Some were clear, but some were almost completely gone. Kakashi asked, "Have you ever hit a vein before?"

Naruto thought for a moment and said, "No, I don't think so. Not before today anyway."

Kakashi let out a sigh of relief. He said, "Okay, that's not great but it could be worse."

"I-I guess."

Iruka watched the boy start shaking. He asked, "Why are you scared?"

Naruto put his head on his knees. "I'm not sure what you're going to do about this."

Iruka said, "We're going to let the Hokage know about what's going on, but then it's up to him what we do about this. You're not in trouble, Naruto. We'll keep this secret and you'll continue your training and missions as usual, but with a few changes."

"What changes?"

Kakashi said, "For starters, you need to stop doing this to yourself. To make sure of that, you're to report to me or Iruka everyday for inspection. If you don't, well, we'll just have to do this whole thing all over again and I don't feel like chasing you down and finding you like that again, okay?"

Naruto nodded stiffly. Iruka asked, "Naruto, can you do me a favor?"

Naruto tilted his head at him. Iruka said, "If you need to talk, come to one of us, okay? We don't want anything to happen to you."

Naruto nodded and felt the urge to sleep tugging at him. His eyes started to droop and both Shinobi noticed it at once. Kakashi said, "Alright, well, get some rest. We'll talk more in the morning."

With that, the boy finally relaxed enough to lay down on his bed. Iruka let a tear slip as he watched the boy fall asleep. Kakashi sighed as he left Naruto's bedroom. Iruka followed him out. He shut the door behind himself and turned to Kakashi, who was now leaning against a nearby wall.

Kakashi sighed. "This is a mess."

Iruka nodded and said, "Yeah, definitely. He's always seemed to hyper and happy. I don't like seeing him this way; not one bit."

"Lord Hokage probably won't take this news very well, but he'll possibly know what to do."

Iruka sighed. "Yeah, you're right. I just... I don't understand how he can be doing this bad and none of us noticed it until now."

Kakashi didn't know the answer. In fact, he himself was thinking all the same things. He wasn't sure what to do about Naruto and he'd never expected him to do the things he'd been doing to himself. Kakashi knew Naruto wouldn't completely stop, not at first, and he needed to fix that. Even Iruka knew it, but neither one of them wanted to mention it out loud because it was just a fact. Iruka asked, "Should one of us stay with him for the night? Tomorrow is Sunday, so I don't have to teach."

Kakashi shook his head. "I'll take care of it. You go home, Iruka."

The next morning, Naruto woke up feeling exhausted and sore. He sat up slowly and tried to remember what had happened before he went to sleep. Kakashi-sensei and Iruka-sensei were here... I think they left after I feel asleep. That leaves me some space to take care of somethings then, huh? Good thing, because last night I wanted to rip my arm open again after that talk with those two,Naruto thought to himself. He went to look for his kunai pouch and hissed when he couldn't find it. He kept searching his room until a voice asked, "Looking for something?"

Naruto's face lost all it's color as he realized he was not alone. He turned slowly and saw Kakashi standing in the doorway to his room. Naruto avoided his eyes as he tried to think of an excuse or lie to tell his teacher. Sadly, he knew nothing would work on him.

"Um, no," Naruto tried, even though he knew it was pointless.

Kakashi gave him a cold gaze. He said, "Naruto, sit down."

The boy huffed and sat down on his bed. He tried, and he failed, again. Kakashi walked over to the young Shinobi and knelt in front of him. Kakashi pulled out Naruto's bloody kunai he used not even a full 48 hours ago. Kakashi held it in his hand and asked, "Is this what you were looking for?"

Naruto nodded limply, feeling defeated and ashamed. Kakashi sighed and asked, "Were you also looking for you weapons pouch?"

Again, the boy nodded. Kakashi sighed. "This isn't good for you, you know that."

Naruto asked in a quiet tone, "Why are you telling me all of this? I know I'm pretty messed up in the head, that's just a fact, but you can't expect me to just stop because you tell me so."

His teacher sighed. "You're right, but you need to work with me here. I wanna help you, Naruto, but you have to let me. And no, this is not optional."

The blonde grunted and crossed his arms. Kakashi must've went looking for anything sharp that Naruto could get his hands on. Naruto also knew that he did stay the night, which didn't bother him, but it did annoy him that he couldn't relieve himself of his pain. Naruto sat there quietly, trying to come up with some bullshit excuse to feed the Shinobi, but it he came up with only things that would falter and just fail to do anything but dig his hole a bit deeper. He was still going to try, though.

Kakashi looked at Naruto's arm, that while it was still healing, there was going to be a mark for sure. He even saw all the other faded scars for a moment, and that pulled at his emotions a bit. Kakashi asked quietly, "Is it my fault?"

Naruto flinched. "No, it's not you. It's other things."

"Like what?"

Naruto fell silent and he started shaking. No, he couldn't do this again. It was way too soon and he'd just gotten a hold of himself for a moment in time after everything that had happened the day before. He couldn't do it, he just couldn't. As he tried to stand up, Kakashi put his hand on the boy's shoulder and forced him to stay down. He felt the shaking, and it only made him feel worse. Kakashi said softly, "Naruto, you can trust me. I'm not going to hurt you or judge you."

The boy hesitated for a few moments. He knew that if he did say anything, there was no taking it back, and that was something that Naruto couldn't risk. He sat there quietly and Kakashi sighed. They had a lot to work on. Before long, Naruto came to the conclusion it would make things easier to tell white-haired man what he wanted to know. He wasn't gong to like what he had to say.

"For so long... I had nobody. I still have nobody to be there for me," Naruto muttered loud enough for Kakashi to hear.

Kakashu's expression grew sad again. "Naruto, that's not true. You can come to me or Iruka, know that."

"Yeah, well, I still have no friends to talk to."

Ouch, that was a deep wound. Kakashi just looked at him at that moment. It wasn't like Sasuke and Sakura treated him as their equal, and in fact, they treated him like some pesky little kid. The man wanted to scold them for making him feel this way, but that would have to wait for another day and another time. He'd make his students understand the damage they caused and didn't prevent from happening.

Kakashi asked, "Is there anything else?"

Naruto paused before he spoke again. He said, "Yeah, I'm an idiot. Everyone knows it and that's all I'll ever be. Plus, I'm just a filthy demon vessel."

That hurt to listen to. By this point, Kakashi felt the need to hurt someone, mostly the villagers and other ninja, for putting these thoughts into his head. He felt guilty for all the things he said as well, because he'd also called Naruto an idiot, but he didn't mean to discourage the boy. He said it to make him do better. Apparently, that had back fired. Now feeling horrible, Kakashi looked down at the floor. There was something that just didn't line up with all the stories and reasons Naruto gave. Not to mention all the nonsense he was spitting out about being a filthy demon vessel. Kakashi felt his blood boil at the thought of his young student believing all this nonsense.

Between the look in the young boy's eyes and his body language, there was more to it than that. Kakashi felt his throat tighten at the idea of the boy feeling all these things when he had done nothing to deserve it and nobody had the right to make him feel the way he did. Kakashi always thought Naruto managed himself all those eyes of being alone and that he'd overpowered all those ideas and thoughts that people had tried to put into his head. However, it seemed, Naruto feel to the mercy of all those thoughts and he had let him consume his mind.

Not only had that happened, but he never said a word about it to anyone, even Iruka. There was something in all of that that seemed to not line up; nobody noticed the injuries for so long. How had they never noticed anything was wrong with him? How had even Kakashi have known nothing of it? At that moment, there was a pain in his chest that reminded Kakashi that he was still just a child inside.

Naruto asked, "So, what are you going to do about me?"

"For now, just answer some questions and we'll start from there, okay?"

The young boy nodded and waited for the questions to start pouring out.

"How long have you been doing this to yourself?" Kakashi asked calmly.

Naruto answered hesitantly, "Since I was about five."

"Right. Okay, how've you been hiding it from everyone?"

Naruto sighed. "I heal insanely fast, so for a while, the scars were barely there, but over time, I had to stop doing it as often because the cuts got deeper and deeper. Plus, my body was trying to heal from training so much."

Kakashi nodded. "So, didn't you ever think, you know, that this wasn't normal and it wasn't healthy?"

Naruto snorted and shot back, "Of course I knew! If you haven't noticed, I'm not freaking normal!"

Kakashi held his hands up lazily in defense and said, "Alright, alright, you have a point, nothing about your life is normal, but so what? That doesn't mean you don't feel the same things any other person would."

"You're wrong, sensei. I don't feel the same things a normal person does! Everyone has someone except for me! Don't you dare try to understand how I feel being a piece of shit that nobody wanted in the first place! Don't feed me that bullshit!" Naruto hissed at Kakashi.

Kakashi winced at the boy's words. Kakashi said softly, "Naruto, you're not alone anymore. I can, so does Sakura, Iruka, and Sasuke. They don't want to see you like this anymore. There's nothing wrong with you, you're a good kid and a good shinobi. Don't believe any of the crap you think is true."

Naruto looked down with his head down. He asked, "Sensei, why do I exist? What was my purpose? Just to be this... This monster?"

Kakashi felt his throat and chest tighten just a little bit more. He said, "Naruto, please, don't say those things. You... You don't understand it now, but you weren't just born to be a vessel. I can't tell you everything, but you weren't supposed to live this life you do. This just had to happen to end the war and save our village."

Naruto stayed quiet. The silence broke his sensei's normal composure to the point of Kakashi nearly telling him about his sensei and everything about Naruto's parents, but it was meant to be a secret until the boy was ready. Kakashi put his hand on Naruto's shoulder and said, "I swear, one day, this will all make sense, but for now, you just have to trust me."