The Marauders sat at the back of their Charms class, as always.
The Professor had let them be after telling them all to charm their books
into dancing. With the exception of Peter, each one had mastered this trick
and sat talking amongst themselves for the remainder of the class. Sirius
sat with his feet propped up against his desk, his book lying open and flat
in front of him. He had a cool elegance about him, and the girls sitting
across from them kept giggling as they ogled him with hungry eyes. James,
of course, sat next to Sirius. He had his elbow on his desk and leaned
against it, watching Lily as his book did a frantic jig in front of him.
Remus sat on the other side of Sirius.
"So, I hear you're going with Finn?" Sirius asked Remus with interest. James dragged his attention away from Lily to hear. Peter continued working on charming his book with no success.
Remus stole a glace and Adriana before he answered. "Yes," he said carefully.
The Marauders knew how he felt about Ri, but they didn't talk about it much. Sirius was always trying to convince Remus to go for it with her, but none of them knew how she felt about James.
"You finally went for it, eh?" James asked, raising his eyebrows.
Remus squirmed in his seat, praying that she couldn't hear them talking. He stole another anxious glance at Ri. She was laughing at something Lily had said.
"Something like that," Remus answered.
"Good for you!" Sirius leaned forward and clapped Remus on the back. But he said this loudly and both Lily and Adriana turned to see what they were talking about. Lily smiled at him, scowled at James and then turned back around, but Ri held his gaze for longer. He wondered if she knew what they were talking about.
Remus was saved from having to respond by the bell. It was now time for lunch and the Gryffindor's herded out of the classroom.
The dance and Remus's date was not discussed again for the two weeks until the dance. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When the day of the dance approached, Remus was more nervous than he had ever been in his life. Actually, he was more than nervous. He was terrified. Adriana and he had gone on as if nothing was different. She had continued to sulk about the fact that James was taking "a stupid loser" like Kelsey, and treating him like the brother she never had.
They had agreed to meet in the common room at six-thirty, a half an hour before the dance, and hang out with the other Marauders. This had seemed like a brilliant idea at the time, but after agreeing to do this, Remus realized that Adriana more than likely had a hidden motive behind her suggestion. Hanging with the Marauders meant hanging with James.
Even after agreeing to go to the dance with him, Ri was still going to fawn after James like a lost puppy.
At five o'clock that day Remus went upstairs with Sirius and James to get ready. Peter had gone to the library to avoid the other dance- goers. Remus put on his dress robes as the other too guys chatted. After getting ready he stood in front of the mirror, judging himself.
While not as incredibly good looking as Sirius or James, Remus was not at all lacking. He had shaggy light-brown hair that was dusted with different shades of darker brown, and fell around his ears and just brushed his neck in the back. He had an endearing face and high cheekbones, with a small scar close to his left ear. His eyes were a fathomless dark brown with blue flecks around the pupil, the eyes of someone you trust. Remus was fit too, standing at 5'11". Strong and intense, characteristics he had gained from his life as a werewolf. What was not to like?
But he knew what was not to like. Knew what it was that Adriana didn't like.
He was not James Potter.
"Oi! Moony!" James interrupted Remus's thoughts as he got up and stood beside him. "Sirius and I are heading down to meet the girls," he raised his eyebrows, putting emphasis on the word girls. "You ready?"
Remus nodded and the three made their way downstairs. The common room was more crowded than usual, with students meeting their dates. At first Remus thought that he would never find Adriana amongst the students but he soon spotted her standing close to the fireplace next to Kelsey Smithettes and Lily. He chuckled to himself and thought about how she must be mortified to be stuck with Kelsey.
He nudged James in the arm and the two headed towards their dates. With a nod, Sirius headed in the opposite direction, after his own sixth-year date. When they reached Adriana and Kelsey, James acted like the arrogant fool he was and began to flirt outrageously with his date. Remus knew he was only doing this because Lily was standing three feet away, looking absolutely disgusted. With a quick whispered word to Adriana, Lily walked away and James's enthusiasm died down a bit.
Adriana was watching James with a pained expression, and Remus took this opportunity to admire her looks.
Ri was gorgeous. She looked like a seraph, heavenly and too good to be real. She had kept her appearance as close to normal as possible, knowing Remus would be upset if she didn't, the only alteration was her hair was several inches longer than it should be. She had swept it up loosely and held it together with some small flower clips. Stray curls hung down, framing her face in strategic places. She wore make-up too, a rare occurrence for her. Her brown eyes were dusted with emerald and gold shadow and a faint flush stained her cheeks. Her dress robes were of the same emerald colour with a dark brown and gold trim. Remus had to mentally kick himself to keep from staring.
He leaned close to her ear and whispered, "You look gorgeous, Ri."
She blushed a bit and playfully elbowed him in the ribs. "You don't look bad yourself, Lupin."
At that moment Sirius made his way over, his arm around a remarkably beautiful girl of Spanish decent. She seemed absolutely ecstatic to be with him. James ceased flirting with Kelsey long enough to smirk at Sirius.
"You're looking good tonight, Finn." Sirius complimented Adriana, which was followed by a scathing glance directed at Ri from his date. Adriana thanked him, ignoring the other girl.
"Yeah Finn, you look positively beautiful. Lucky Mooney eh?" James spoke and Adriana glowed at his praise. Remus frowned.
Sirius noticed Remus's frown and opened his mouth to say something when he was cut off by the voice of Professor McGonagall. "You may now proceed down to the Great Hall. The dance is about to begin."
The three couples then made their way down, following the crowd out the door. Sirius and James hurried from the room, but Remus wanted to keep a bit of a distance from them so he could spend more time with Adriana without James as a distraction so he hung back a little. After several couples passed them he offered his arm to Adriana and the two followed everyone out.
The four house tables of the Great Hall had been removed and replaced by dozens of little tables, each of which seated eight, all placed in a great circle that outlined the dance floor. An unknown band was playing softly in the background.
They were to eat dinner first, and as they made their way into the room they spotted Lily and her date, Cory Ernst, a seventh year prefect, seated at a table far off in the corner. Remus and Adriana headed towards them and took seats.
"Hey Lily, mind if we join you?" Adriana spoke teasingly as she took a seat next to her best friend.
Everything was going great until Sirius and James spotted the four of them and joined the table. The smile that had covered Lily's face fell and Adriana seemed to brighten up.
"Hey there Moony thought we'd lost you for a bit." Sirius flopped down in the seat next to Remus as James made a show of helping Kelsey into her seat. Sirius snickered as he watched James and Lily sneered.
"Evans," James nodded coolly and Lily forced a smile. "Potter," she returned and then turned from him, showering attention on her own date and practically ignoring everyone else at the table. James was not to be outdone and did the same with his date. Soon after taking their seats, Sirius's date remembered that she had forgotten something in her room and ran off to go get it. This left Sirius, Remus, and Adriana to talk.
Remus watched as Sirius's date ran off, a sudden thought entering his head as he turned his attention to his friend. "Padfoot? What's her name?" He gestured at the girl.
"Meghan," Sirius replied.
Lily, who had apparently been listening turned and glared at Sirius. "Actually, her name is Melissa." Remus suppressed a laugh.
Sirius appeared indifferent as he answered back, "Well, how was I supposed to know? She didn't correct me when I called her Meghan."
"You're such a prince Black," Ri said.
Sirius shrugged.
Melissa returned and Sirius turned his attention to her. Soon after the food arrived and was eaten, and following that the dance began.
As the night progressed, Remus forgot to be nervous and realized that he was having fun. With James, Kelsey, and everyone else off dancing, Remus was free to talk to her without distractions. They even danced a few times. Everything was going good. Great.
But all good things must come to an end, and that end came too soon for Remus. Far sooner than it should have.
As Remus and Adriana had returned to their seats after the song they had been dancing to ended, she spotted James in the corner with Kelsey. It was obvious what the two were doing, and without a word she had turned in the opposite direction, leaving the Great Hall.
Remus stood stunned for a moment before he regained his senses and followed after her. After she had made it out into the hallways she broke into a run, going outside. He followed her, trying to ignore the curious stares of people passing by.
When he made it outside he did not see her at first, but soon spotted her leaning against a tree around the corner. Her eyes were shut, and even without seeing the tears he knew she was crying and the thought cut through his insides.
He slowly walked towards her. "Ri ..." When he reached her she wiped her eyes and looked at him. They stood there in silence for a moment, his heart ripping to shreds with each second. "Come on Ri, don't cry ... it's not worth it to-"
"How do you know what its worth?" She nearly spat the words out at him. "You don't know anything! Do you know how hard it is for me to have to sit there and watch him as he goes for every girl but me? For Christ sakes, she's my roommate!" Adriana dissolved into tears again and slid down so that she was sitting on the ground. Remus sat down beside her carefully. "Go away Lupin." She said feebly.
"I know more than you think," he said, not bothering to disguise that sorrow in his voice. She looked over at him.
They sat together in quiet; even Adriana's tears became silent. For once, Remus could think of nothing to say. No comforting words, no reassurances. The only thought he could think of was that he had lost. He had always known that he would never win against James, but this was the first time he had ever believed it 100% and this knowledge was nearly killing him.
Adriana noticed something different in him too. She was so used to him doing everything in his power to make her feel better, and the absence of this bothered her. She tried to prompt his reassurances. "Lupin?" He did not respond verbally, but turned his head so that he was looking at her. Pain covered every inch of his face. "Couldn't you just talk to James? Say something nice about me or something?"
This was the last straw for him. Something inside of him just snapped and he could no longer find it in him to be nice. He was so sick of everything. "No!" The word exploded from him, mirroring his anger.
She started at the vehemence of his voice. "Lupin?" She questioned, confused at this change in him.
He couldn't stop the feelings from pouring out from him. He couldn't care less anymore if she knew how he felt. He wasn't thinking about anything but his broken heart. "You think I don't know what it's like? I've always known what it's like to love someone who doesn't care?" He stood up and he began to get louder as he spoke. Louder and angrier. "Never once have you ever considered what it's been like for me, having to listen to you cry about him every time I'm around you! Listening and knowing that you don't give a damn about me." The shock on her face nearly stopped him, but he continued anyway. "I've been in love with you for years and you've been too stupid to notice. To wrapped up in James to even consider! Well, I've had it! Go pine after him if you want! But he wants Lily, not you, so it's just a waste of your time!" The tears started to stream down her face again, and she looked as if he had struck her.
Remus couldn't stand it anymore. He turned and walked away, leaving Adriana by herself as she sobbed.
By the time he got back to his room he had cooled off a bit. He undressed and lay back on his bed, throwing an arm over his eyes as if trying to fend off the thoughts.
That had not been how he had imagined telling Ri how he felt. But there was no undoing it now. He had fucked up.
"So, I hear you're going with Finn?" Sirius asked Remus with interest. James dragged his attention away from Lily to hear. Peter continued working on charming his book with no success.
Remus stole a glace and Adriana before he answered. "Yes," he said carefully.
The Marauders knew how he felt about Ri, but they didn't talk about it much. Sirius was always trying to convince Remus to go for it with her, but none of them knew how she felt about James.
"You finally went for it, eh?" James asked, raising his eyebrows.
Remus squirmed in his seat, praying that she couldn't hear them talking. He stole another anxious glance at Ri. She was laughing at something Lily had said.
"Something like that," Remus answered.
"Good for you!" Sirius leaned forward and clapped Remus on the back. But he said this loudly and both Lily and Adriana turned to see what they were talking about. Lily smiled at him, scowled at James and then turned back around, but Ri held his gaze for longer. He wondered if she knew what they were talking about.
Remus was saved from having to respond by the bell. It was now time for lunch and the Gryffindor's herded out of the classroom.
The dance and Remus's date was not discussed again for the two weeks until the dance. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When the day of the dance approached, Remus was more nervous than he had ever been in his life. Actually, he was more than nervous. He was terrified. Adriana and he had gone on as if nothing was different. She had continued to sulk about the fact that James was taking "a stupid loser" like Kelsey, and treating him like the brother she never had.
They had agreed to meet in the common room at six-thirty, a half an hour before the dance, and hang out with the other Marauders. This had seemed like a brilliant idea at the time, but after agreeing to do this, Remus realized that Adriana more than likely had a hidden motive behind her suggestion. Hanging with the Marauders meant hanging with James.
Even after agreeing to go to the dance with him, Ri was still going to fawn after James like a lost puppy.
At five o'clock that day Remus went upstairs with Sirius and James to get ready. Peter had gone to the library to avoid the other dance- goers. Remus put on his dress robes as the other too guys chatted. After getting ready he stood in front of the mirror, judging himself.
While not as incredibly good looking as Sirius or James, Remus was not at all lacking. He had shaggy light-brown hair that was dusted with different shades of darker brown, and fell around his ears and just brushed his neck in the back. He had an endearing face and high cheekbones, with a small scar close to his left ear. His eyes were a fathomless dark brown with blue flecks around the pupil, the eyes of someone you trust. Remus was fit too, standing at 5'11". Strong and intense, characteristics he had gained from his life as a werewolf. What was not to like?
But he knew what was not to like. Knew what it was that Adriana didn't like.
He was not James Potter.
"Oi! Moony!" James interrupted Remus's thoughts as he got up and stood beside him. "Sirius and I are heading down to meet the girls," he raised his eyebrows, putting emphasis on the word girls. "You ready?"
Remus nodded and the three made their way downstairs. The common room was more crowded than usual, with students meeting their dates. At first Remus thought that he would never find Adriana amongst the students but he soon spotted her standing close to the fireplace next to Kelsey Smithettes and Lily. He chuckled to himself and thought about how she must be mortified to be stuck with Kelsey.
He nudged James in the arm and the two headed towards their dates. With a nod, Sirius headed in the opposite direction, after his own sixth-year date. When they reached Adriana and Kelsey, James acted like the arrogant fool he was and began to flirt outrageously with his date. Remus knew he was only doing this because Lily was standing three feet away, looking absolutely disgusted. With a quick whispered word to Adriana, Lily walked away and James's enthusiasm died down a bit.
Adriana was watching James with a pained expression, and Remus took this opportunity to admire her looks.
Ri was gorgeous. She looked like a seraph, heavenly and too good to be real. She had kept her appearance as close to normal as possible, knowing Remus would be upset if she didn't, the only alteration was her hair was several inches longer than it should be. She had swept it up loosely and held it together with some small flower clips. Stray curls hung down, framing her face in strategic places. She wore make-up too, a rare occurrence for her. Her brown eyes were dusted with emerald and gold shadow and a faint flush stained her cheeks. Her dress robes were of the same emerald colour with a dark brown and gold trim. Remus had to mentally kick himself to keep from staring.
He leaned close to her ear and whispered, "You look gorgeous, Ri."
She blushed a bit and playfully elbowed him in the ribs. "You don't look bad yourself, Lupin."
At that moment Sirius made his way over, his arm around a remarkably beautiful girl of Spanish decent. She seemed absolutely ecstatic to be with him. James ceased flirting with Kelsey long enough to smirk at Sirius.
"You're looking good tonight, Finn." Sirius complimented Adriana, which was followed by a scathing glance directed at Ri from his date. Adriana thanked him, ignoring the other girl.
"Yeah Finn, you look positively beautiful. Lucky Mooney eh?" James spoke and Adriana glowed at his praise. Remus frowned.
Sirius noticed Remus's frown and opened his mouth to say something when he was cut off by the voice of Professor McGonagall. "You may now proceed down to the Great Hall. The dance is about to begin."
The three couples then made their way down, following the crowd out the door. Sirius and James hurried from the room, but Remus wanted to keep a bit of a distance from them so he could spend more time with Adriana without James as a distraction so he hung back a little. After several couples passed them he offered his arm to Adriana and the two followed everyone out.
The four house tables of the Great Hall had been removed and replaced by dozens of little tables, each of which seated eight, all placed in a great circle that outlined the dance floor. An unknown band was playing softly in the background.
They were to eat dinner first, and as they made their way into the room they spotted Lily and her date, Cory Ernst, a seventh year prefect, seated at a table far off in the corner. Remus and Adriana headed towards them and took seats.
"Hey Lily, mind if we join you?" Adriana spoke teasingly as she took a seat next to her best friend.
Everything was going great until Sirius and James spotted the four of them and joined the table. The smile that had covered Lily's face fell and Adriana seemed to brighten up.
"Hey there Moony thought we'd lost you for a bit." Sirius flopped down in the seat next to Remus as James made a show of helping Kelsey into her seat. Sirius snickered as he watched James and Lily sneered.
"Evans," James nodded coolly and Lily forced a smile. "Potter," she returned and then turned from him, showering attention on her own date and practically ignoring everyone else at the table. James was not to be outdone and did the same with his date. Soon after taking their seats, Sirius's date remembered that she had forgotten something in her room and ran off to go get it. This left Sirius, Remus, and Adriana to talk.
Remus watched as Sirius's date ran off, a sudden thought entering his head as he turned his attention to his friend. "Padfoot? What's her name?" He gestured at the girl.
"Meghan," Sirius replied.
Lily, who had apparently been listening turned and glared at Sirius. "Actually, her name is Melissa." Remus suppressed a laugh.
Sirius appeared indifferent as he answered back, "Well, how was I supposed to know? She didn't correct me when I called her Meghan."
"You're such a prince Black," Ri said.
Sirius shrugged.
Melissa returned and Sirius turned his attention to her. Soon after the food arrived and was eaten, and following that the dance began.
As the night progressed, Remus forgot to be nervous and realized that he was having fun. With James, Kelsey, and everyone else off dancing, Remus was free to talk to her without distractions. They even danced a few times. Everything was going good. Great.
But all good things must come to an end, and that end came too soon for Remus. Far sooner than it should have.
As Remus and Adriana had returned to their seats after the song they had been dancing to ended, she spotted James in the corner with Kelsey. It was obvious what the two were doing, and without a word she had turned in the opposite direction, leaving the Great Hall.
Remus stood stunned for a moment before he regained his senses and followed after her. After she had made it out into the hallways she broke into a run, going outside. He followed her, trying to ignore the curious stares of people passing by.
When he made it outside he did not see her at first, but soon spotted her leaning against a tree around the corner. Her eyes were shut, and even without seeing the tears he knew she was crying and the thought cut through his insides.
He slowly walked towards her. "Ri ..." When he reached her she wiped her eyes and looked at him. They stood there in silence for a moment, his heart ripping to shreds with each second. "Come on Ri, don't cry ... it's not worth it to-"
"How do you know what its worth?" She nearly spat the words out at him. "You don't know anything! Do you know how hard it is for me to have to sit there and watch him as he goes for every girl but me? For Christ sakes, she's my roommate!" Adriana dissolved into tears again and slid down so that she was sitting on the ground. Remus sat down beside her carefully. "Go away Lupin." She said feebly.
"I know more than you think," he said, not bothering to disguise that sorrow in his voice. She looked over at him.
They sat together in quiet; even Adriana's tears became silent. For once, Remus could think of nothing to say. No comforting words, no reassurances. The only thought he could think of was that he had lost. He had always known that he would never win against James, but this was the first time he had ever believed it 100% and this knowledge was nearly killing him.
Adriana noticed something different in him too. She was so used to him doing everything in his power to make her feel better, and the absence of this bothered her. She tried to prompt his reassurances. "Lupin?" He did not respond verbally, but turned his head so that he was looking at her. Pain covered every inch of his face. "Couldn't you just talk to James? Say something nice about me or something?"
This was the last straw for him. Something inside of him just snapped and he could no longer find it in him to be nice. He was so sick of everything. "No!" The word exploded from him, mirroring his anger.
She started at the vehemence of his voice. "Lupin?" She questioned, confused at this change in him.
He couldn't stop the feelings from pouring out from him. He couldn't care less anymore if she knew how he felt. He wasn't thinking about anything but his broken heart. "You think I don't know what it's like? I've always known what it's like to love someone who doesn't care?" He stood up and he began to get louder as he spoke. Louder and angrier. "Never once have you ever considered what it's been like for me, having to listen to you cry about him every time I'm around you! Listening and knowing that you don't give a damn about me." The shock on her face nearly stopped him, but he continued anyway. "I've been in love with you for years and you've been too stupid to notice. To wrapped up in James to even consider! Well, I've had it! Go pine after him if you want! But he wants Lily, not you, so it's just a waste of your time!" The tears started to stream down her face again, and she looked as if he had struck her.
Remus couldn't stand it anymore. He turned and walked away, leaving Adriana by herself as she sobbed.
By the time he got back to his room he had cooled off a bit. He undressed and lay back on his bed, throwing an arm over his eyes as if trying to fend off the thoughts.
That had not been how he had imagined telling Ri how he felt. But there was no undoing it now. He had fucked up.