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Chapter X- I'm the Stronger.
When Neji and Hinata left the treatment room, Kurenai and Shizune were on the waiting room. The youngsters bowed to the ladies and moved to the door, but Shizune called their attention:
"Hinata, remember: no harsh trainings, don't stress yourself, rest a lot and I expect to see you in my office at the Hospital tomorrow, OK!"
"Yes, Shizune-san…"
"Neji, make sure she gets plenty of rest!" – Kurenai said and Neji only nodded.
The door closed behind them and Shizune said:
"A good thing you called me. Those medic nins here are just novice, they wouldn't guess her problem. By the way, how did you figured out that her chakra failure was pregnancy symptom?"
"Hinata told me that they were sexually active, and I just connected the facts…"
"I thought that their marriage was just a formality, not for real…"
"I think they do not believe it is for real…not yet." – and the crimson eyes of the jounin were lost somewhere, just like her mind.
---------------------------------------------------
Arriving home, Hinata took a long bath and managed to eat something. Neji was silent all way long; in the apartment, he sat in the living room couch, staring nowhere. Hinata took a place beside him, touched his hair, but he flinched; and she moved the hand away.
"I'm sorry…." – she was looking at her knees.
"Go rest."
"And you?"
"It is not your concern."
"It is….I'm worried…."
"To late for worries…" – he continued staring nowhere, never looking at her.
"We must talk to my father…"
"We'll do that later."
"We must explain the situation; maybe he can reconsider your ANBU dismissal…"
"Go rest."
There was no possible dialog in that moment; both were tired and had a lot in their minds. Hinata laid on the bed and finally, after all those weeks of stress, she could rest. Her whole body and soul relaxed in a dreamless sleep.
Neji raised from the couch a few hours later, checked on his wife. She was sound asleep. He opened the front door and walked towards the Hyuga Mansion. He decided to talk alone to Hiashi, afraid that his uncle could use the cursed seal due to his previous behavior. It would not be wise to make Hinata face one of her father's lectures in her current state.
As an obedient Branch House member, Neji asked for an audience with the Head and waited until he was admitted in Hiashi's chamber.
He entered the room; head bowed never looking at the man sat on the tatami. Neji kneeled and put his forehead on the floor, waiting the Leader allow him to talk.
"So, what is your business here, Neji?" – The voice was cold and monotone.
"I came to report the cause of Hinata-sama's failure in the Jounin Exams, and also her current state" – he lifted a little his head, so his voice could be clearly heard.
"I can see no other reason for her defeat than her own incompetence."
"Hinata-sama suffered a chakra failure…"
"I could see that." – Hiashi harshly interrupted the boy. Neji bitted his lower lip, retaining his anger, but continued his speech:
"After a medical evaluation by Shizune-san, Godaime's apprentice, it was evidenced that Hinata'sama is…pregnant." – The last word was slowly pronounced as its sound could make real the thing Neji was still facing as a nightmare.
Hiashi took a deep breath, and after a minute he asked:
"Is it proved? Is she really expecting a child?" – His words were faltering.
"Yes. The gestation is about two weeks now." – He couldn't still believe in those words. Having a child with Hinata was something he never imagined.
"Raise your head, Neji" – the young man did as said. Hiashi had a calm expression on his face, like considering something.
"Byakugan requires a lot of chakra when used…that is why she failed. The child is also demanding a considerable amount of her chakra. She would never win that battle or any other in this period. It is a good thing that the pregnancy was evidenced early…" – the old man was talking more to himself than to Neji.
"Sir, I was unsuccessful on the task you asked me. Hinata-sama couldn't achieve the Jounin level, so I'll deliver my letter of retirement from ANBU tomorrow morning."
"You shall not do this." – Neji looked Hiashi in the eyes for the first time since he was in the chamber – "You may have failed in this particular task, but you were successful on another. One of your marriage purposes was the continuation of Hyuga's bloodline."
"Even, so… It is too early to say that the child will survive…." – Neji somehow wanted to believe in his words...
"Hyuga is a powerful clan; we will make sure Hinata receive the best treatment. Besides, you were blessed with the thickest Hyuga blood, so will be your children. This pregnancy will be successful."
Neji was cursing his own blood, his fate, his life, Hinata, Hiashi…
He left the Manor but couldn't convince himself to go to the apartment. Straying in the Hyuga compound, Neji found himself in the garden, Hinata's garden. He sat there, looking at the flowers. Summer gave all colors to that garden, scents of all nature, a peaceful spot in that hatred ground. He understood why Hinata was always there.
He kept himself caressing a small daisy, turning it like a helix, amused by its movement. Then, another presence could be felt in the place. Hyugas had no need to turn in these situations, they had byakugan. But Neji recognized the intruder by scent: lavender perfume – Hinata.
"Why y you c came a alone?"
"………"
"You t told F Father a about…"
"Yes."
"And he…"
"Acted like a happy grandfather….."
"He did?"
"Of course not, silly! But he was very pleased with the news….so pleased that I'm still ANBU."
"You are? Oh my! I told he would be merciful!"
"What is a man's mercy compared to a merciless life….." – He was still playing with the daisy. Hinata felt the bitterness of his voice and embraced him. This time he didn't flinch.
'I know you didn't want this child. Neither did I. But we must face the fact and move forward like we did until now. It is not the first problem we are facing together; we can do it, niisan!"
"It is not about you and me, Hinata. It is about a third person, someone who didn't ask to be here, an innocent that will suffer all the Hyuga clan pressure. It will be an Heir, just like you, with same obligations and demands!"
"Neji….It will be our child. We will raise it the way we want!"
"Dream on! The council, that bastard Hideo, even your father will never give us that chance!"
"The child is ours! If they don't let us do like we want, Hyuga will lose two heirs: me and the baby!"
"Run away?" – He stared her from over the shoulder.
"Yes. I could do that! My family is more important than this clan foolishness!"
"Oh, you are really naïve….Lets go home…"
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Opposing all Neji's deep dark desires, the pregnancy was going well. Hinata's belly was growing proudly. At the fourth month of gestation, Hinata was showing all her beauty. People say some pregnant women became more beautiful and radiant; Hyuga Hinata was one of those women. In the first months she hid the belly with her oversized coats, a little ashamed; but when her body assumed the round forms of motherhood, she decided to show off wearing dresses and anything that could evidence her belly. Not to mention her attitude. The girl that walked staring the floor beneath her feet was long gone; the mother Hinata walked head up, confident and unafraid.
All their friends congratulated for the baby (Neji couldn't care less). Hinata was exultant, planning the baby's nursery, buying clothes and toys. Sanae-san, Neji's granny, made a lot of blankets, clothes, shoes, hoods and other baby stuff. Hiashi bought a glider for his daughter and Hanabi loved to go shopping baby things with her sister.
The Hyuga family received well the coming of a new heir,….except the father himself. Neji continued his life as always: missions, trainings, defeating Lee….His routine never changed; when he was with Hinata he never spoke about the baby. Even when she managed to bring on the subject, he answered laconically or nodded his head. That baby was still an illusion in his mind, something he expected to fade away any moment.
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She was observing her teammates training, sat in a bench.
"Hey, mom of the year, what do we have for lunch today?" – Kiba asked cleaning his sweat forehead and patting her tummy.
"I made some obento. I hope you like!" – She said.
"You better eat fast, Kiba. We still have to review some techniques." – Shino told, taking a bite of his lunch.
"It is a pity you couldn't become a jounin, Kiba-kun."
"I wasn't expecting much with all the war between Fire and Water, lack of train, and after your fight, I simply was unable to concentrate in the battle."
"In the end, only Shino-kun, Sakura-san and Shikamaru became jounin."
"Next year we will try again, ne Hinata?" – Kiba said cheerfully.
"I don't think so. On the next year exams, Hinata's baby will be only three months." – Shino spoke.
"That is t true. I w will o only be a able to take a another Exam in t two years…." – Hinata for the first time realized what that premature pregnancy meant in her shinobi life.
"Only if you and Neji don't decide to give my nephew a brother or a sister first!"- Kiba mocked.
"Kiba-kun!" – And she became red at the mention of another baby in their lives.
"Since when Hinata's child is your nephew?" – asked Shino.
"Oh come on! Hina-chan is like a sister to me! Her baby will be like a nephew! The only problem is her lovely husband…"
"Thanks Kiba-kun. I appreciate your concern for my child. Just don't talk like that about Neji."
"Is he still ignoring the baby?" – Shino asked, adjusting the sunglasses in his nose.
"It is not easy for him…." – Hinata stared her feet while caressing her belly.
Neji wasn't properly ignoring the baby; he was most likely continuing his life without changes. Hinata decided not bother him with baby issues, so she asked help from Sakura, Ino and Hanabi.
One afternoon the four girls decided to decorate the baby room, which was Neji's former study room.
"So, we are going to destroy the 'Hyuga Neji shrine'? Does he know about that?" – Ino asked while looking at the study room.
"It is his problem. Father offered a place for Hinata, him and the baby in the Manor, but he refused, so crush the shrine!" – Hanabi told already moving away some of Neji's scrolls.
"What color should we paint the room?" – wondered Sakura.
"White is good. Makes the room look bigger" – said Hinata.
When Neji arrived home later, he saw his scrolls piled up in the living room. The four ladies were still decorating the room; he leaned in the door frame and observed their job. Hinata noticed his presence and came to greet him.
"Hi dear!" – Giving a sweet kiss on his lips – "What do you think of the baby's room?"
"It is…a baby room….a normal one…..I guess….."
"But do you think that the teddy bears we painted on the walls might scary the baby?"
He looked at the brownish earful forms painted on the walls, barely distinguishing any bears. Not to mention the pink birdies Hanabi was painting…
"This room will scare to death my child and if it happens Hiashi will kill me for not protecting the little heir. Better clean that entire freaky zoo on the walls." – He said, moving to the bathroom. Hinata, Sakura, Ino and Hanabi remained open mouthed, but stayed until evening re-painting the walls.
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Hinata and Neji were getting dressed to one of Hyuga's family meetings. That one was to celebrate Hinata's first child.
The girl had a lot of trouble finding a Kimono that fit her round form, and ended up borrowing one from Chouji's mother (who was as fat as her son).
All Main Family members were sat in an enormous wooden table. Hiashi was on the edge having Hanabi and Hideo on his left side, and Hinata and Neji at his right side. Neji wasn't very pleased to sit in front of his grandfather.
During the meal, a variety of themes were discussed; from politics to movie stars. Hanabi was talking about her last genin mission and about her unborn niece (she wanted a girl, because they would play together).
The daughter of Gramps Hideo's brother asked Hinata:
"So, Hinata-sama, when will be the child birth?"
"P-Probably in the middle of spring…."
"This is good! Spring is the right season! Time for things to blossom!" – said Hiashi's younger sister, Haru.
"By the way, do you know if it is a boy or a girl?" – asked another lady. (Neji was just thinking how stupid those women were, gossiping all time).
"No…t-tomorrow w-we will make the t-test…"
"I bet is a boy! Her belly is too rounding. Girls pregnancy always make the woman get a round face but not so round belly…."- said other woman.
"All this is useless. The important thing is the Hyuga blood flow strongly" – said a man.
"That is right! What we need is a pure blood heir!" – Another elder man spoke.
"Pure blood this child will have, since the Main Family chose the strongest vessel of Hyuga talents to match with the heiress…" – Hideo viciously said, glaring at Neji. Hinata felt sick at those words from her grandfather.
Neji felt like a horse, used for breeding purposes. His pride couldn't let his mouth shut:
"So it is all about breeding Hyuga heirs? Nice! When did the Hyuga members became animals for reproduction purposes only?"
"What did you thought it was about? Love union between Hinata and you? Of course not, ignorant Branch House. She is weak and inappropriate to be the successor. You are strong and talented, but the lower Branch blood makes you unable to be the successor. You are both vessels to the rightful heir" – Hideo told still glaring at his grandson.
"Father, this is not the truth. Hinata will be the successor and her family shall protect Hyuga bloodline." – Hiashi intervened.
"When it comes to this Hizashi's child you become too soft, Hiashi. The boy has the perfect genes to pass on to the Main Family. If it weren't the circumstances, he could be the Heir. Hinata has only her position in the family. Thank Gods you had a daughter and Hizashi had a son to fix this fate twist! Imagine if we had to marry Hinata with someone else with not so pure blood! She would disgrace the clan as leader and breeder!" – The old man continued to talk. Hinata was on the verge of tears, feeling miserable. Neji was too furious to pay attention to his wife; he only wanted to punch the bastard's face.
"Father, I shall no longer accept these kind of words about my late brother, Hinata and Neji. Let's change the subject".
Ignoring Hiashi's words, Hideo continued his insults:
"Don't hide the truth. See, boy, do you have feelings for this child?" – He was glaring at Neji, grinning. Neji remained speechless. Deep inside, that pregnancy had always been a nuisance for him. – "You see…that is the feeling. You are nothing more than a procreator, and protector for the heiress lineage. You don't feel like a father to this child because deep inside you know it is not your position."
Neji was feeling sick, infuriated. Nobody had ever compared him to a prized horse; in the past he was called servant, menace, bully, and other things, but never procreator….
He simply stood up and ignoring all the presents, left the room and the Manor. Hinata was holding her tears and staring at her grandfather. Hiashi had his eyes closed and after some minutes he said:
"Are you feeling all right, Hinata. I'll ask a servant to take you upstairs, to your room".
"I'm not staying Father. I must look for my husband, my cousin…..the only family I have." – And she also left the House.
Heavy rain was pouring from the skies. Hinata was soaked, but continued running trough the Hyuga compound, trying to find Neji. She looked at the fields, training areas, the garden and their apartment. He was nowhere. She sat at the front door of a store in the commercial district, still getting wet and crying.
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Neji walked around the compound a few minutes before it started raining. When the first drops fell, he went to the only place he could feel safe: his mother's house.
Natsume opened her front door, surprised to see her son soaked and pale.
"Dear! What is wrong?"
"Mother, just hug me and don't ask." – She did as said. Took her boy to the living room, lighted the fireplace and brought a towel to dry his hair. He remained silent, looking at the fire.
"Is it wrong……" – he whispered like it was a sin – "to not love your unborn child? Is it wrong, mother?"
"Dear….is this your problem?" – She was rocking his long hair, sensing how confused her son was.
"I feel nothing for Hinata's baby. It is like it has nothing concerning me. And this night, at the dinner, that bastard Hideo said it was because I'm just a ….procreator…." – it was very subtle, but Neji was trembling.
"He said that? What a monster! Neji you are not a procreator; you are a very talented shinobi, a teenager whose life was disgraced by the Main Family! The death of your father, this arranged marriage, all the mistreat Branch House receives, even this pregnancy; it is all Main Family's fault! Don't blame yourself".
"Mother, this child has nothing to do with all this mess. Even Hinata-sama is a victim."
"Hinata-sama will always be protected by her status, no matter how weak and unfitted she is. You can only count with your talents. Don't worry about her."
"And the baby?"
"I…I don't know… But I do know it will also be under the wings of the Main Family. Son, you will never have a chance to be a father to this child." – Neji sensed that Hideo's words were true: he was nothing to that child, only the Branch House man that contributed with his genes. His mouth opened, like trying to say something, but he couldn't find the words…
Mother and son remained silent, looking at the fireplace. Suddenly, a knock could be heard in the front door. Natsume stood up, opened the door just to see her soaked to the soul daughter-in-law:
"I-I'm s-sorry to d-disturb you so l-late, but I c-can't f-find Neji anywhere…If y-you s-see him, p-please tell t-that I'll be w-waiting in o-our a-apartment…." – Hinata was completely wet, embracing herself, shaking from the cold rain.
Natsume only moved a step to right so the girl could see inside the living room and her lost husband.
"I think you two have a lot to talk. I'll make some tea…" – the older lady said, leaving them alone.
"T-Thank God, y-you are h-here! I t-thought you l-left the c-compound…" – she rushed to him, with a feeble smile.
"Come sit near the fireplace and warm yourself. It was really foolish to walk in such a storm in your conditions." – Neji spoke in his cold monotone voice.
"I w-was worried! G-Grandfather was s-so m-mean to you…." – she sat beside him, stretching her arms to feel the heat of the fire.
"He is not entirely wrong…." – he felt ashamed to say those words.
"N-Niisan…you c-can't be s-serious!" – Her voice had a begging tone. Neji just waved his head, the long hair covering his face.
"He is right. I feel nothing for this child. No matter how much I try, I cannot accept this."
"It is not the baby you don't accept, it is the situation itself. We married by force, denying all our dreams, whishes, loves…." – she was staring at the fireplace, her white eyes reflected the red light of the fire – "Maybe things were easier for me because I'm used to withdraw, give up my dreams and accept that I'm a failure. But you always fought to achieve what you wanted, no matter how hard, forbidden or impossible. You are a genius, niisan. And that is why a pointless forced marriage upsets you so much."
"Hinata-sama…." – he was staring her, wondering if she had any notion that the one who sacrificed most for that marriage was her. Neji knew about her love for Naruto (which never faded), about her dedication to her teammates, about how much she was trying to become stronger, to be acknowledged.
There she was, soaked after looking for him in the rain, searching in the entire Hyuga compound, almost five months pregnant, and still trying to place all the blame at herself. During her life, Hinata got used to be the guilty one.
Neji touched her face, making she look at him. Her eyes were peaceful and she had that shy smile; the one she always had when was expecting a scold or a reprimand. He had been the reason for that smile so many times over the years….
But, not this time. He moved closer, cupped her chin and placed a kiss on her lips. In return, Hinata caressed his face with her wet and cold hands. They intensified the kiss. Neji added his tongue, flavoring her mouth. With a sweet moan, she also touched his tongue with hers. Only a break to breath and again Hinata was timidly kissing his upper lip and then his lower lip. Neji gave an open mouth kiss, claiming her sweet lips to his own. She placed her hand on his hair, pulling him closer; the free hand caressed his muscled arms and shoulders. He had one hand supporting her back, and the other moving trough her breasts, hips and round belly.
"AHEM…." – and the magic sexy moment vaporized in the air when Natsume entered the living room, holding a towel and a clean kimono – "These are for you, Hinata-sama. It is not wise to be wet in your condition. Please, go to the restroom and change yourself so we can have our tea".
"Thank you very much, Natsume-san" – Hinata picked the things Natsume was offering and quickly moved to the restroom. Her face was red as a tomato.
"You know, when I lived with your father, we only gave a kiss like that after your birth…." – Natsume joked.
"Times change, mom." – Neji had a amused look in his eyes and a clever smile on his lips.
"Even considering that your father and I were fourteen years older than you are now?" – She had the same clever smile.
"Maybe..."
"You care a lot about her, don't you?"
"I...do. She is very special, different from the other jerks from the Main Family. She has always been different".
"Your father was very fond of her too". – Natsume was looking at a picture of Hizashi, Neji and herself in the mantelpiece.
"T-Thanks for t-the c-clothes, N-Natsume-san…"
The three sat together and had their tea. The rain was still punishing the trees and rooftops in Konoha. Natsume decided that Neji and Hinata should spend the night in her house. And so they did (not wise to argue with your mother-in-law).
Early in the morning, a shy sun was showing its rays behind the heavy clouds. Neji came back from training and entered his former bedroom where Hinata was still sleeping. He sat on the futon, and tickled her ear; she waved her hands to stop the tickle.
"Hey, time to rise and shine, or you will be late for your appointment with Shizune-san" – hearing the last words, Hinata woke up in a jump, scared.
"What time is it, niisan?"
"Almost nine..."
"My! The appointment is nine thirty! I must hurry!" – She started to walk around the room, searching her dresser…
"You are in my mom's house, remember?"
"Oh!...So I'm in trouble! I must go back to the apartment to change myself!" – She was completely disoriented. Neji was just smirking, waiting to see how far her confusion would go.
"I was in the apartment and brought some clothes for you." – He decided to end the mental torture.
"Niisan! Thank you so much!" – she started to take away the robe she used to sleep, and suddenly froze and stared him, blushing – "A-Are y-you g-going to s-stay h-here?"
"Yep. Don't make such a fuss; I've seen you naked already! No big deal!" – He laid on the futon, waiting for her response.
"I-It is d-different…" – Hinata would start an argument, but she knew Neji well enough to say he would only have fun and make the discussion endless. Since there was no time, she went to the bathroom and changed her clothes there, alone. Neji remained in the bedroom, laughing to himself.
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They arrived late for the appointment, even though they left the compound in time. Hinata stopped in all baby stores she found in the way. Took notes of the prices for cribs and strollers, asking Neji what was his opinion about. He wondered why women wanted the shiniest and glittered cribs that would only scare the poor baby. What is wrong with the wooden and simple ones?
At the hospital, Shizune greeted the couple and guided them to the examination room.
Hinata laid on a bed, while Shizune asked some questions about her health and conditions.
"So, it is your first time here, Neji!" – The medic-nin said.
"Yeah…"
"Curious about the sex of the baby?"
"Not so much…" – he wasn't, really.
"D-Do you t-think w-we will be a-able to f-find out the gender w-with this device, Shizune-san?" – Hinata was staring at the TV like thing next to her.
"Depends on the baby position. Most of the time we can see if it is a boy or a girl!"- Shizune answered while preparing the device. She lifted a little Hinata's shirt to expose the belly. – "So, are you ready to know the gender of the baby?"
"Yes, please!" – Hinata was really excited! That pregnancy was special to her, giving the happiest days of her life. She wanted to know the baby's gender to name it and prepare the nursery. Neji was just looking trough the window, paying attention to a canary on a nearby tree.
"Well, I can see its back" – said Shizune moving the device on Hinata's belly. On the TV, only a shadow could be seen.
"Niisan, come see it!" – Neji sat on the edge of the bed, close to Hinata's head.
"Hum…seems our little one is giving us a hard time…I'll move to the right to view his face…."
Shizune started to travel the device through Hinata's belly, until she said:
"There! I can see his face. It is a boy!... And...wait..." – the medic-nin moved again the device and, trough another angle the TV displayed not one, but two baby faces. – "Twins! You've got twins!"
Neji's eyes widened at the sight of the two little babies, facing each other on the TV.
Hinata held her breath for a moment; a cold sensation engulfed her, like shadows lurking in every corner of that room, of her soul. She started to cry, sobbing, pulling out her hair in complete despair. She could hear nothing; she could feel nothing, only that cursed TV and the vision of the two babies.
Shizune was startled by Hinata's behavior and couldn't move from her place. Neji, regained his senses quickly and shouted:
"TURN OFF! Turn off this damn thing!" – He was holding his wife by the shoulders, calling her name. It was all useless, she was too nervous to hear.
Shizune did as he said and rushed from the room, to get some help.
"Hinata-sama! Hinata! Listen to me!" – he was trying to make her stop.
"Oh no! Oh no! Not twins! Please, tell me this is a nightmare!" – she was grasping his clothes, crying.
"……It is true…I'm sorry…." – he embraced her, feeling the hot tears in his eyes also.
"Oh no! My poor babies….This can't be true, niisan. This can't be true!"
Hinata was screaming and grieving. Neji never saw her in that condition; but he could understand the pain.
"I want to die (sob)….Die and take with me this poor little things…..(sob)" – she fisted her hands and her arm made a circle in the air, aimed to the belly. Neji held her wrists and said:
"Look at me, Hinata!" – he grabbed her hair with the other hand – "Be strong! You said we could face the problems together!"
"Not this….it is too much…." – she was still forcing her fist into the belly. He struggled to move away that hand.
"Listen to me! You have better eyes than me! Like Naruto, you can see things with heart and not reason only! You have always been the strongest of us!"
"I'm not the strongest….I'm a failure….Even a simple task like generating a child I screwed up."
"Not true!"
"It is! Twins, Neji! Twins! The only thing that could go wrong in this pregnancy happened! They will take away our baby! Give to adoption and mark it with the cursed seal!" – Painful cries and sobs started again, her whole body crumbled in his arms tired from fighting that invisible enemy: destiny.
"Hinata, you must get a hold on yourself! I need you to be brave! I need you!" – He was crying too – "You must be strong, for us…the four of us…"
"The …f-four of u-us?"
"Yes! The four of us: you, me and the babies. Please, don't let the despair take place. I know the sensation well; it hurts a lot and takes time to heal. Please…"
"Niisan….I'm so sad…." – she rested her head in his lap. He simply stared the ceiling and caressed her hair.
Shizune came back and Tsunade was right behind her.
"Here, Hinata-chan. This will calm you down" – Shizune said while applying a shot in the girl's arms.
"So, it seems your family will get larger than expected, huh?" – Tsunade told, looking at the defeated couple. – "Let's think together…."