So Arnold and I have tried this new note-passing deal, Helga wrote in her journal as soon as she made it home from school. Basically, we go to class and do everything as normal, but during class we write each other about our thoughts or the day in general and give the notes to each other in the time between classes. It worked out well all day today... until LILA happened.

That's right, LILA. Stupid, perfect LILA and her perfectness that shines doth o'er my beloved's head. She's in love with him. Completely stricken so I'm afraid and I'll tell you how I know.

So there we were, sitting in english class about to do fishbowl, this whole routine that Linders has down where he picks three of us to read from out of our white books and gets graded in front of the whole class. And sure, Arnold got picked and his was great- he showed this expertly crafted abstract art of space that he'd drawn on his book –but Lila got chosen too... and she read a poem.

Now mind you, why ANYONE would want to write poetry in the same class I'm in is bewildering to me too, journal, but the fact that she shared it- and one so...so... BALLSY. I mean, the girl was practically up there pining for Arnold's heart the whole dang time! So naturally, what did I do but write a poem of my very own to share when Linders opened the floor.

So I shared, and my poem was OBVIOUSLY better, but that's not the point. I hope that she learned from my words that Arnold isn't going to go so willy nilly into her clutches. He's MINE. Not to say I own him, but he IS my boyfriend, isn't he? And that means that he isn't hers to claim even if it was in some lame flowery poem that could have been written by a six-year-old.

Anyway, so I had my fun, right? I told Lila off in front of the whole class and that means that I should be over it all, right? Well, wrong, of course. Helga G. Pataki can't let things go THAT easily. No, no, no, I decided to write Arnold an angry note finally asking him why he was so angry and practically accusing him of cheating on me point blank. Criminy, I was a mess to do that.

But Arnold, the perfect, sweet, chivalrous gentleman that he is, he read my note with such care and simply brushed off my pointed accusation and explained calmly that he was instead disappointed that I didn't trust him when it came to the switching teams thing. Which I get, I mean, I GUESS I'd be a little miffed if I knew that Arnold didn't trust me, but that's really not what it was all about. I just wanted to see him more... that's all. But I think he understands now. I hope he does at least.

Then we made up, all through notes of course, but I still don't feel right. I feel kind of... lost somehow. I know Arnold isn't cheating on me, I mean, if he was he'd have to be doing it expertly well considering I know everything there is to know about him. But rather, it's just that, UGH. It's LILA, alright? I can't help but picture that dumb kiss they shared and now, thanks to her poem, I know she isn't stopping her thinking about it either. And that really grinds my gears.

I should do a segment about things that grind my gears. Note to self.

Anyway, I'm just so frustrated that that even happened. Curse Lloyd and her stupid party! Curse her and her lame spin the bottle! Why did it have to be Lila, huh? It could have been ANYONE but her but it WAS her and now it's driving me insane. Every time I even SEE them together it drives me mad like it has control over me entirely.

I don't know. Maybe I'm being ridiculous even if she IS in love with the boy. Arnold loves ME, not her. And doesn't that mean I shouldn't be jealous and I should instead just be happy that I'm with him?

I guess that's ONE way to look at it.

Helga G. Pataki

Helga shut her journal and sighed, pulling her mattress up to wedge the book in between the bed and the bed-frame into its new cozy little home. She would have to return to this venture of writing later as she knew Arnold was expecting her for family dinner any minute now. Toying with the idea of skipping it altogether, Helga decided she wanted to go so she could see Arnold's parents and maybe talk to either of them and get their opinion on what she should do or think when it came to her continuing jealousy. Surely, they had to know a thing or two about jealousy in a relationship... didn't they?

Helga stood awkwardly washing dishes with Stella as Arnold and Miles chattered away in the dining room as they cleared the table of their silverware. She wanted to say something, she really did, but she was too afraid Arnold might hear her innermost fears. She knew he probably figured how jealous she was, but she didn't want him to know know. And she wasn't too keen on the idea of him hearing her talk to his mother about everything because she didn't feel comfortable talking to anyone else about this sort of thing.

So Helga stood silently, washing the same spot over and over again on the clearly clean dish that she was holding as Stella eyed her curiously.

"You're awfully quiet tonight," Stella mused as Helga shrugged her shoulders and pursed her lips trying to keep her mouth shut from her actual problems.

"Nothing worth saying," Helga finally spoke after a moment before sighing and continuing to wash the dish she was holding. Stella smirked while shaking her head.

Reaching a lone finger out to point at the dish Helga held firmly in her wet grip, Stella eyed the young girl in amusement and said, "You realize you've been scrubbing that plate for a good five minutes, don't you?"

Helga blinked rapidly to pull herself from her thoughts and glanced at the plate she had been incessantly scrubbing. "Oh, uh," she stuttered out, "I just uh, wanted to make sure it was...was..."

"Clean?" Stella finished for her and Helga turned to look at her love's mother while nodding her head almost sporadically.

"Yes! Yes. I just wanted to make sure it was clean. That's right. That totally makes sense. Obviously." Her words were disjointed from one another and at Helga's odd string of statements, Stella set down the plate she'd been working on. With a few wipes of her hands on a nearby towel, she walked over to sit down at the nearby table while simultaneously pulling out the chair beside her.

Motioning to the empty chair that was ready for Helga to sit upon, Stella gestured for her to approach. "Helga, why don't you sit down with me for a second."

Twisting her facial expression into one that both showed panic and shame, Helga set down her obviously clean plate and sponge then walked over to take a seat where Stella had motioned. Taking a shaky breath, Helga asked in a quiet voice, "Am I in trouble or something?" her voice then raised to a normal volume as she began to spew out useless information. "Look, if I'm in trouble for the plate thing because it might take off the design or something on it, I'll have you know that at my house we strictly use paper plates. That is, unless Olga comes home which means my parents break out the good china and it isn't like they let me clean it so it isn't really my strong suit and-"

Stella mustered out a laugh which stopped Helga in her tracks. As the blonde girl watched Stella in confusion, she began to worry about what motives Arnold's mom had in the first place of the little chat they were about to have. Still in fear though that she had somehow offended Mrs. Shortman, she was all but relieved to see the woman shake her head slowly amid her soft chuckling.

"No, you're not in trouble," Stella assured her, and she took a calming breath to settle her nerves.

"Well that's a relief," she said while leaning back into the wooden chair she sat at.

"I am concerned about you, though."

Helga's eyes widened for fear that Stella was about to confront her about the relationship she shared with her son but she tried to keep it cool. "Concerned? About me? Naaaaah, you don't have to be concerned about little ol' me. I'm great- peachy keen as some old folks might say. Life is great! Spectacular!" Once she was able to shut up, Helga silently scolded herself for the obnoxious response she'd given to Stella. If she only suspected something to be wrong before, Helga was sure that she knew something was up now.

With a raise of her eyebrow, Stella eyed Helga suspiciously. "And you really expect me to believe that?"

Chewing on her lip in fear that she'd been found out, Helga nodded her head slowly before hesitantly speaking out a response. "Uh... yes...?"

"Welp," Stella sighed out while slapping her thighs and pushing herself to stand up, "I guess if you say everything is fine then everything is fine, right?"

"Right," the young woman answered definitively.

"Everything is going great and you and Arnold are just perfect, yes?" The oddly-shaped-headed boy's mother pushed and Helga paused for a moment before answering; a slight quiver in her voice.

"...yes..."

"So, between you and me, I should probably just leave you alone and keep all of my sage wisdom to myself because- like you said –you don't need any of it whatsoever," a smile tugged on the corners of Stella's lips as Helga loosened on her stance.

"Well, it isn't like-" she tried, but her surrogate mother was hot on the case and cut her off with haste.

"I mean, look at you, Helga," she went on, "hardly into your teens and already have life figured out. It's quite impressive, really."

Helga reached up to scratch absentmindedly at the back of her head. "I wouldn't say I have everything figured out in life..."

"At the very least, it sure seems like you have the relationship aspect figured out which, to be honest, is one of the harder parts of being in middle school, wouldn't you agree?" Stella had taken steps towards the sink to go back to washing dishes but was peeking over her shoulder in an effort to gauge the blonde girl's physical response to her words.

Helga began to stutter out her next chosen words; the ferocity with which Arnold's mom was asking questions mixed with assumptions starting to rattle her. "I'm just... I'm not entirely sure I'm the best person to ask that-"

"Right, right," Stella agreed while drying off one of the plates that had already been washed and set to the side to dry, "it isn't like you'd know anything about a relationship that was in despair. You're pretty lucky to not have to go through the typical hardships that your age bracket struggles through."

At that statement, Helga silenced herself for fear she would only lead Stella on to continue with her bizzare statements. It's almost as if she knows something's up and is trying to wiggle it out of me or something, Helga thought. As she thought this, Stella set the plate she was drying with the other previously dried plates and wiped her hands on the towel she'd been sporting. With a small sigh, she then hung up the towel and turned around to face Helga once more.

"I guess I should relieve Arnold of his clean-up and let you two do whatever it is you do," Stella said with a knowing nod of her head and offered Helga a smile while turning to make her way out of the kitchen in search of Arnold.

Helga couldn't let her do that, though. She knew she had to talk to her and get some actual good advice rather than ask her own mother or, god forbid, her father who could care less about her relationship with Arnold than he cared about any other somewhat serious issue that plagued the blonde girl's life.

"Stella, wait!" Helga exclaimed just as she was about to leave the kitchen entirely.

At the sound of her name in the young girl's panicked tone, Stella stopped in her tracks with a grin though Helga couldn't see from where she still remained at the table. Slowly turning her head to look at her while still remaining frozen in her own footsteps, Stella pretended she had no idea why she was being called back to talk. "Yes, Helga? Is something wrong?"

The moment the mother met eyes with Helga however, she knew her reverse-psychology approach hadn't fooled the intelligent girl who sat still in the chair with crossed arms and a blank expression. At the sudden change in demeanor, Stella was caught by surprise but tried to keep her composure. Surely Helga would explain what she was thinking in that moment and it wouldn't take long.

"Yeah, something's wrong alright," was the response Stella received and she tried to act surprised to hear such a thing come out of the teenager's mouth.

"Well honey, what is it?" She was trying to give as much compassion as she could but Helga didn't seem receptive to such a technique.

"Don't honey me, Stella," she replied with disdain, "you think I don't know what you're doing? You think I don't know you're trying to make me feel bad for not telling you what you know is wrong in my life and then walk away in an effort to get me to admit it? Hmm?"

It was Stella's turn to feel nervous at the sudden role reverse between to the women. "I uh, I just figured-"

Helga was already shaking her head at Stella's words. "Look, I know this kind of thing probably works on your son, but that's only because- let's face the facts here –Arnold is what I'd call a 'pathological goody.'"

"A pathological goody?" Stella repeated and Helga continued without a beat.

"A pathological goody, yes. Basically he knows he wants advice but because he's always the one to dish it out, he doesn't exactly know how to ask it so he pretends he has no problems and hopes someone else figures out what he's doing. My guess is that you've figured this out by now and so he knows he can just play that routine and you'll do your reverse-psychology bit which he'll eat out of the palm of his hand and soon be putty in your own."

Stella remained quiet as Helga spoke and once Helga had seemingly finished, she continued to hold her tongue. Taking this as some kind of cue to continue, Helga did just that.

Crossing her leg over the other as she sat, Helga took a breath before she went on without coaxing. "Obviously I'm not trying to be rude or anything, it's just that I've known the kid basically his entire life and he's pretty cut and dry when it comes to this kind of thing. I can only assume that you feel I need to talk about whatever it is Arnoldo told you which brings you to trying your methods in hopes that they'll work on me too."

"All I want to do is help, Helga," Stella's voice was soft and almost hurt which led Helga to believe that she'd spoken out of turn once again and hurt one of the only people in her life who seemed to genuinely care about her and what she was going through. Granted, Helga only really thought this was because she was dating Stella's son, but she seemed to care nonetheless.

With a sigh, Helga uncrossed her arms and let her hands fall limply onto her lap. "Right, I uh, I guess I'm still just not really used to the whole 'adults wanting to help me' thing quite yet."

"It's alright," the older woman told her warmly. "You're just being a teenager and I'm just..." she let out a breath and looked over at the empty chair that stood just beside her son's girlfriend. Stepping toward it, she promptly sat down and spoke just above a whisper. "I guess I'm still just trying to figure out how to be a good mom."

"Oh c'mon, Stella. Get real, would you?" a sarcastic voice emitted from Helga who was shocked at such a statement, "You're like, the best mom that a kid could ask for."

This made Stella chuckle sadly and in clear disbelief at what had been said. "You don't have to say that, Helga-"

"I'm not just saying that, okay?" she interrupted the self-conscious mother, "Arnold's never been the luckiest kid in the universe but when it comes to parents he hit the jackpot."

"We missed so much of his life though," Stella went on as though the words were spilling out of her all at once. "It all feels like I'm just struggling to catch up."

"But you will, you know," Helga was quick to add. "You know as well as I do that you and Miles will catch up so fast and it will be as if you were always here in the first place."

A small smile grew on Stella's face and she reached out to squeeze the wise-beyond-her-years 7th grader's shoulder in appreciation. "Thank you, Helga. And just as I know you and Arnold will be okay, deep down you know it too."

With a widening of her eyes, Helga stared incredulously at the woman she'd grown to know so well. "Wait- what? Arnold, he-he told you? What did he tell you?" The words came out in haste from the girl's mouth as if the faster they were spoken, the quicker she'd get an answer.

Stella merely chuckled while offering a minute shake of her head. " As I'm sure you already know, I can't just tell you what he said but... I knew something was up between the two of you."

Helga frowned and looked down at her hands which remained sitting on her lap. "It's all my fault, honestly," she admitted softly as though the words carried all of her shame themselves. "I just get so... jealous, you know? It's like-like... like any time that I see him with that stupid Lila or any other girl that threatens me for whatever reason, my mind goes into overdrive and I start doing things I probably wouldn't normally do if I wasn't so...so..."

"So self-conscious?" Stella tried, but the young girl simply shook her head before speaking out the true answer.

"Afraid," she admitted at long last before elaborating. "I don't know, it's just that I feel like I've waited centuries for Arnold to admit he had feelings for me and now that he has, I'm freaked out that he'll take them all back or something and leave me feeling like a complete idiot for ever believing I had a chance to be with him."

"You realize that you're both hardly even teenagers yet, right?" The words had a hint of humor to them but Helga didn't feel like laughing.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. But I also know that there isn't anyone else in the world for me beside Arnold. I've known that since I was practically an infant, okay?" Her words had a defensive quality to them but Stella brushed off the tone entirely.

"Oh, Helga," the mother said warmly while smiling in the blonde preteen's direction, "I get that these feelings are really intense right now. At your age, hormones run wild and can make you think in either black or white instead of all the other shades in the rainbow. It's normal, you know."

Helga shot Stella a glare while narrowing her eyes. "What are you getting at?"

"My point is that you're still young and you'll meet countless other people that might make you feel that way beside Arnold." Her words were empathetic as she spoke; each word hitting Helga's eardrums like a sharpened knife as the sentiment hurt more than gave the girl any sense of relief. "I'm not saying you may not end up with him ultimately, but you need to give yourself a chance to explore and accept the other feelings you'll encounter in your life."

"But don't you get it?" Helga shot back, her words full of fire and acidity. "I don't want to feel those feelings towards anyone else. I like feeling how I feel right now."

"You like being paranoid and accusatory? You enjoy feeling stressed about where your future will end up in regards to your current feelings and relationship?" The question didn't require an answer from Helga and while she felt like screaming, she simply remained silent and kept her eyes hot on Stella who was giving her the definition of 'tough love.'

After a moment devoid of words between the two women, Helga chose to speak once more, however this time there was a sense of defeat behind her voice. "So what should I do then?" It was a question made in earnest with her eyes full of hope that the older woman who sat beside her would have all of the answers Helga was seeking.

Stella took her hands in her own and held them tightly. "Just feel," she advised without breaking eye contact. "Ride the emotions you feel and investigate why you feel them in the first place. All you can do at your age is enjoy the time you have being so young. Explore the world and explore relationships of all varieties. You have to know that one day everything will work out."

"But I don't know that it will all work out," Helga muttered but Stella wasn't concerned in the slightest at her admittance.

"And that's okay," she encouraged. "What isn't okay is committing so completely to something like a serious relationship at your age. Sure, date and have fun and be 'in love,' but at the end of the day know that this stuff and these feelings aren't permanent- at least not in the way you've been treating them."

"Is that even possible? To treat my emotions like they're fleeting and everything will change one day? That kinda makes me feel like nothing really matters and what's the point in trying." Her statement was blunt and took Stella by surprise but she took a breath to steady herself and tried to offer some kind of solace in how Helga was feeling.

Letting go of her hands, Stella sighed and broke eye contact for a moment before looking back at the confused girl ahead of her. "Can I tell you a story?" she asked softly and Helga nodded her head slowly; completely unsure as to where she was headed with this.

"When I was your age, I lived in a very small town," Stella explained. "In that town there was a boy that I had very strong feelings for and in my mind I had convinced myself that what we shared, or rather, what I felt that I shared with him was the realest and truest love there ever was. To me, we were destined to be together until the end of time and for a while, we even 'dated' if you could call what we did together dating."

"What does that even mean?"

Stella chuckled, "it means that dating at that age is almost frivolous," she said while recalling her childhood memories. "The fights were pointless and the dates were silly. We believed we were dealing with tough issues a serious couple fought over but it was hardly the half of it. Once you grow up and have a serious committed relationship, you deal with the actual hard problems."

"Like what? Jealousy? Because I already have that," Helga was unconvinced and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Sure, at the beginning of most relationships there is an element of jealousy but that isn't the kind of problems that I meant. I'm talking about bills and arguments about how to raise a child or if you even want children. Discussions on where to live and how to live with one another." Helga watched Stella curiously as the woman expressed the adult troubles the preteen had no experience with. "And sure, there are silly fights that last only a few minutes- things like who should have done the dishes or the laundry. Things like what to watch that night or do. Sometimes it's even about misplacing something and blaming the other person for it's absence."

"That's what an adult relationship is like? Criminy, that sounds boring."

A laugh escaped Stella's lips at her bold observance. "It can be, but through all of that it has it's rewards."

Helga seemed skeptical of this and raised a brow at the statement. "Rewards? Like what?"

This made Stella think for a moment of the perfect answer. "One day, in this magical adult relationship you'll be invested in, you'll look back at other dating experiences you've had and you'll have the sudden realization that you're happier than you've ever been." A nostalgic smile spread across the woman's lips as she continued. "You'll think back to five years, ten years or even twenty years ago and know that while you'd had an inkling to the kind of happiness your future self would experience, it is shaped entirely differently from what you'd once imagined. And in that realization, you'll know that everything you've gone through to get to that moment was worth it... and that you wouldn't want it any other way."

After a few moments without a single word between the two, Helga spoke up once more. "Is this some kind of weird tactic at getting me to break up with your son or something?" The question almost shocked Stella. "Like, that's awesome and I get that you're trying to give me some kind of 'it get's better' speech here, and I really appreciate it, but is that what's happening here? You're trying to say I should break up with Arnold and just... live my life?"

"That is, in no way, what I'm trying to suggest," Stella answered. "In fact, I'd hope that you know I love that Arnold has someone besides his family who cares so much for him. All I'm trying to tell you is that I don't want you to get hung up on labels or the concept of a relationship. It may change as time goes on and you may go through things that you ordinarily wouldn't want to experience but in the end, it will lead you down the path you need to go down so you can reach that point where you see it was all worth it. It will come full circle- that I can promise."

Stella's words hung in the air and repeated themselves to Helga as her and Arnold spent some time together before she ultimately went back to her home and settled in for bed. As she tried to sleep, she focused on all that Stella had told her and tried to imagine this life she had spoke so fondly of for the young girl. Trying with all her might, Helga attempted to picture this life and what she wanted it to look like.

However, no matter what she did or which scenario she landed on, it only ever ended with one person: the footballhead she'd loved ever since that rainy day outside of the Urban Tots building all those years ago. And as she fell asleep with images of what she hoped would be their eventual future dancing around in her head, Helga's subconscious made a decision Stella surely wouldn't approve of.

She'd do whatever it took not to lose Arnold, for she was sure of the future they would one day share together. Arnold may not be sure of it, but Helga was and she wasn't about to let that fall between the spaces of her fingers like sand at the beach. Nobody would come between them, not Lila- not anyone, and Helga was determined to make sure of that if it was the last thing she did.

Hello All! Polkahotness is BACK and I'm back with a vengeance! I will start out here by apologizing for the crazy long hiatus of like an entire year almost on the dot when it comes to this story, BUT- I have a much clearer picture of what I want this story to become and I have spent a long time figuring out the ins and outs of the future plots to come. This story is going to be a long journey complete with what I hope will be an account of Arnold and Helga's life together as they grow up and become adults. So stay tuned, be sure to favorite and follow so you never miss an update, and PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE review so I know what you think of what I've been writing!

ALSO: Check out the new and improved cover for this story which was done by the ever wonderful, crazy talented, super fantastical Jebpinkartsy (previously jebbiepinkart on tumblr which is where I first saw their amazing art)! This cover is everything I've ever wanted and a perfect representation of this story- I love it. I just figured that since this fic is coming off of hiatus after like forever, it deserved a face-lift and something new to celebrate it's return!

Anyway, favorite, follow, review and MOST IMPORTANTLY, enjoy! This story isn't going anywhere anytime soon and I can't WAIT to see you at the next chapter!

xo

Polkahotness

(PS, i promise not all of the A/N's from here on out will be this long)