"You still haven't told us your name, now that I think of it. Anyway… You kind of remind me of me, you know. You're a Saiyan from the Frieza Army that's ended up on Earth and instead of killing everyone chose to help the people out. Sister, I really feel that. I wanted to drop an Extinction Bomb on humanity when I first landed too. Too much trouble, couldn't be bothered with that…" Jaco kept on babbling on the communications.
Had Chayote the know-how of how he even patched himself up on her communicators, she'd kick him right out of it but he just kind of connected to her out of nowhere and now her precious silence was filled with his vocal buffoonery. At least the Earthling could keep her trap shut, something that was surprising, knowing who her sister was.
"My name is Chayote. Now shut up, you're getting in the way of my training." Chayote replied, she wondered for a blink if Jaco and Tights could hear her if she just spoke out loud in her ship but Jaco wouldn't let her stay curious for too long.
"Training? You've got training gear onboard? Oh… I mean… Of course, you'd have some weights and maybe even a yoga mat… You've been on Earth, right? No way you didn't pick up yoga, that's one of two things that humanity should never become extinct for. Food and yoga." Jaco went on.
"What are you talking about, Jaco? You only eat milk and cheese anyway…" Tights finally cut into the conversation though Chayote really wanted it to be so that she wouldn't have.
"That's because it's closest to what I eat back home. That being said, Earthlings have the best food at least in their galaxy. This milk and cheese stuff… Wow!" Jaco explained something that nobody really wanted him to explain.
"Do you have a yoga mat? This ship is so lame and I could use some light stretching. I'd even walk through space to get on your ship… If I know my father, he made the ship have a bunch of useless features." Tights sighed.
The girl may have been right. Dr. Brief was that sort of a genius inventor, capable of unmatched breakthroughs for his species though always bogged down by meaningless junk he chose to stuff his amazing inventions with. That was why Chayote preferred Bulma, the young lady was just as smart, naturally slower but more aware of what the necessities were, which made her actually a more efficient inventor at the end of the day.
"I do not have a yoga mat and I haven't really tested anything your father installed. Except for the fridge, I suppose. That has come in handy. I train using image training, it's an Earthling method of training where you visualize your training and unite the soul and the body, essentially living through training you're not actually going through, making you stronger in the process." Chayote explained just so she could avoid the follow-up tirade of questions about what she meant with Jaco interrupting her training and so on.
"Oh… That's a unique method. I like to train watching action movies, in fact, it's one of my three hobbies!" Jaco sounded quite proud of his dumbass training method.
"That must be why you're so puny…" Chayote grumped back at him, dealing with the fact that she wouldn't get any training done with Lord Slug and his commander goons still looking for the same thing that she was looking for. Something needed to be done about him and his priestess bitches that ratted out where the Dragon Balls were. His commanders were far too powerful to confront. No amount of skill could have compensated a difference in power that drastic.
"That's so mean!" Jaco yelled out. "I'll have you know that I am an excellent, Super-Elite Galactic Patrolman, in fact, bringing justice is the second one of my hobbies!"
"Ultimate Dragon Ball detected! Ultimate Dragon Ball detected!"
"What was that?" Jaco wondered.
"We're landing on this planet. Shut the hell up and follow me, or don't, I don't care…" Chayote grumbled out while her spaceship halted to observe the next planet she'd be landing on. It was a bleak, sand-colored space marble with large cloud layers on top.
"What are you doing? Why aren't you landing?" Jaco wondered.
"I'm trying to have the ship download some intel on the planet before I land." Chayote replied.
"But the nearest space-station is still the one that the Lord Slug's commander raided," Jaco said.
It was a fair point. Chayote did care a little if he would follow her or not, truth be told. He might not have been much help in battle, being of lesser power level than most Frieza Army soldiers, but he was still an extra pair of hands and sometimes he did have a bright idea or two.
"What do you say, Tights? Do we help Chayote or not? Frankly, I'd rather bring some more justice…" Jaco spoke with a faked disinterest.
"No way! This is perfect! Collecting seven magical orbs throughout the universe is just the kind of adventure my sci-fi novel needs and the mixture of magic and sci-fi is something that's never been done before! Mysticism meets science, I can almost feel the warmth of the printed page already!" Tights cried out in enthusiasm and Jaco's ship followed not too far away from Chayote.
"I know this planet, it's Planet Nicro!" Jaco pointed out while the two ships struggled against the pains of entering a foreign atmosphere and floated in the hot, desert skies of the planet hosting the Dragon Ball. "This won't be fun at all, I might just need to employ my third hobby – explosions!"
"What do you know about these Nicronians?" Chayote wondered. There was something useful to be gained from Jaco accompanying her after all, barring the constant stroke-inducing banter he engaged in on the communication line.
"They're a relatively weak alien species that is capable of reading minds and creating illusions. They use their long tongues to lick moss off of rocks and to scrape out shellfish flesh out of the shells." Jaco said.
"Shellfish? This place looks like a dump though…" Chayote noted the sandy surface of the planet that, judging from its external look, expanded all throughout the space rock.
"Nicronian shellfish lurk in dried out riverbeds, waiting for a flood to fill them up. They also feed on the moss though theirs forms inside their own shells." Jaco pointed out.
Chayote let the spaceship float over the skies a little bit to approach closer to the location of the Ultimate Dragon Ball. She stopped just when the signal was becoming the strongest. Back on Planet Sando she basically floated right over the Dragon Ball with this kind of signal and just needed to dive down and get it though this time she wouldn't have the third dimension to dive down through so the ball might have been a little bit further, either way, it wouldn't be this hard to find in desert so dry it made one's mouth feel like they've just eaten toilet paper.
"The Dragon Ball is right down there. It must be inside one of those shells…" Chayote pointed at the two massive, protective outer layer of the local fauna. It was odd to see that the shells weren't located in a dried-out riverbed though the shellfish might have just gotten curious and wandered off.
"Wow, look there! It's an oasis!" Tights pointed at a distance emerald wonder. "So beautiful!"
"That's odd, there are no oases in Planet Nicro…" Jaco stroke his chin. "I'd reckon that we have fallen into the range of a Nicronian and they've attacked us with illusions. In that case, I wouldn't drink any of that water, if I were you, Tights."
"Hmph… A bunch of wimps, attacking invaders of their planet with visions of oases, what dumbasses!" Chayote grumbled while ordering her ship to land at once. "We could use one of them to scoop out those shells. I'm betting that the Ultimate Dragon Ball is in there."
Chayote jumped out of the spaceship, Jaco's ship was not too far behind to land and the pair of the Galactic Patrolman and the ditzy Earthling author wanna-be hopped out at once. Tights looked rather disinterested in the shellfish if a little freaked out by their size whereas Jaco had one hand on his blaster the whole time. There was something in the air that he didn't like.
"These shellfish have a decent Ki signature…" Chayote pointed out, approaching the pair and kicking one on the side while she walked away and began examining them from all directions, hoping that if the Ultimate Dragon Ball was inside, it would gleam orange for her in the Nicronian sunlight.
"Whaaa, Chayote!" Jaco's yell made the Saiyan jump up and turn toward the shellfish that had its tongue wrapped around Jaco. Chayote shook her head, trying to shake off the illusion that she might have been under.
"Heh! It's no use, let me help it for you though…" a pinkish-orange alien mocked Chayote while the appearance of shellfish began shaking and evaporating away like a dispersing mirage, leaving only a tall, humanoid of a thick chest shell and weak-looking arms as well as a rectangular head with a mohawk-like bone protrusion at the top and a pair of spikes to the sides. The Nicronians had pointy ears and protruded, beady, yellow eyes sunken into a layer of stringy, purple flesh that really stood out in the unremarkable pink design of the creature.
"So more people have come for that Namekian orb, just like you've guessed they would, Raichi!" the taller Nicronian of a deeper shade of pink chuckled at his comrade that still gripped Jaco in one hand.
"That orb is a real godsend, we'd have never known the sweet taste of brains had it never landed on our planet and attracted a whole suite of tourists!" the Nicronian named Raichi smirked to himself while his tongue extended even further and lingered by the side of Jaco's bodysuit, where the ears of the alien would have been.
"So this is how Nicronians look like? Butt-ugly!" Tights pinched her nose and showed her tongue, half turning her head away from the scene of the developing hostage scenario.
"So you know of the Dragon Ball then? Hand it over and maybe I'll let you keep the Galactic Patrolman…" Chayote suggested to the Nicronian that began licking at the plastic of Jaco's earpieces bit by bit.
"Yeah, we know about the Namekian magic orbs, we've seen a few when we visited the place some time ago on an intergalactic student exchange program. We couldn't care about them really but it does attract a whole bunch of weird species that we can eat the brains of. It's like an intergalactic gourmet menu down these parts lately." The non-Raichi Nicronian laughed out, looking impatient to eat something's brains.
"That's so unusual! Nicronians aren't categorized as a dangerous species. You two are a bad seed of your entire species!" Jaco accused his captors. Whether he was incredibly brave, which was unlikely, or too thick to realize the deadly danger looming over his head, which was much more likely, Jaco appeared to be quite brave while confronting his death.
"Zakuro, this little guy seems pretty dumb, his brains may not be all that tasty, capture the females, why won't you?" Raichi suggested before Tights twirled and turned around on one foot before striking a heroic pose in front of the two very confused aliens.
"You two have gotten into a mess of trouble, you see, Chayote here is a Saiyan of the Frieza Army, she's really tough too and even if you do eat her brains – the entire Frieza Army will bomb your pitiful rock into non-existence!" Tights threatened the pair of Nicronian mutants with an acquired taste for brains.
"A… A Saiyan!?" Raichi trembled, the loose of his tongue around Jaco's throat loosened a bit. "That's not good…"
"So what you're saying is that if we kill this girly here, a whole army of goons will land here and feed us their brains too!? I can hardly wait!" Zakuro clapped and rubbed his hands together with a malicious smile. "Hey, Raichi, how about we steal their spaceship too and go fly around the universe, gobbling a whole bunch of brains on our way?"
"Y-Yeah…" Raichi got a bit bolder after imagining the entire universe dreading the two Nicronians, falling ill to their illusions before their tongues finished them off and fed on some succulent brains. "Starting with this pathetic fool right here!"
Tights' eye twitched when Raichi's tongue slipped underneath Jaco's bodysuit and entered into his ear but before it could penetrate his skull and get right to the sweet and juicy part – it slipped out and sent the pink alien reeling back and spitting out as he rubbed his tongue as it had just come into contact with boiling acid.
"What's wrong? Is his brain that small or bland?" Zakuro wondered.
"No! Disgusting, bitter, so bitter!" Raichi yelled and screamed out into the air as if his tongue had just touched something that it could not un-touch as long as the Nicronian lived. "Clean your damn ears sometimes, you filthy animal!"
Jaco laughed out proudly while pressing his fists to his hips and looking up into a blank point in space, trying to pose for a poster of a superhero movie, apparently, "A true hero of justice never removes his bodysuit, for the work of a bringing people justice is never done and bringing justice is my No. 1 hobby!" he declared.
"Plan B!" Zakuro declared after growling. Chayote felt something ethereal hit her head pretty hard as if her blood pressure had multiplied a dozen times and threatened to knock her out. The Saiyan persevered and regained her balance only to open her eyes and see four Jaco standing in front of her.
"Whaaa! Everybody's like me!" one Jaco declared, frightened by the predicament.
"Shut up, you're not the real me, I'm the real me!" Jaco shook his fist at the first one.
"I'm really confused…" third Jaco scratched his head.
"Huh… Why did my chest turn flat all of a sudden?" the fourth Jaco wondered and slapped at its chest. Chayote immediately ruled that Jaco to be Tights. The wanna-be author was too ditzy and straightforward to not react in such a direct manner and, luckily for her, nobody else wanted to try and impersonate her.
"Hey, Jaco," Chayote smirked. She knew that the Nicronians put up this charade to fool her and give them time to eat up Tights' brain at the very least before making their getaway, they just tried to make it look natural, without breaking their faux appearances. "I forgot, what's your third favorite hobby?"
"Huh? Like my third one?" one of the Jaco's pressed a finger to his lips.
"I wouldn't know, it's hard to say, I mean… Who even numbers their hobbies in terms of favoritism, I mean, apart from the very favorite, what's even the point of such a thing, right?" the second one shrugged, trying to look innocent.
"It's explosions!" the third Jaco raised his fist up and declared with valiance as if he had just spoken something meaningful. Truthfully, he did say a meaningful thing though it was not something profoundly deep or something that would end up on a T-shirt, though Chayote counted on something stupid like that being muttered in the first place.
The Saiyan blitzed the weakling Nicronians and knocked each one of them out with one strike each. Jaco jumped up and rushed to the trunk of his spaceship, removing a pair of gadgets that looked similar to Earthling headphones, except they had a coil of steel wire wrapped over them that had a bright flash of electrical impulses running from one side to the other.
"These are neural inhibitors, meant to subdue the mental abilities of most alien species capable of such a thing." Jaco pointed out and placed them onto the subdued pair before running back and pulling out a few loops of rope to tie them up. "This is a rope, it is useful for subduing defeated villains!"
"I know what a rope is, you imbecile!" Chayote flipped out at the Galactic Patrolman who began tying up the beaten Nicronians with a sweaty face. He looked real proud of himself after finishing it too.
"Bringing justice is my No. 1 favorite thing. I know of a perfect planet to drop these two fools to. The planet is surrounded by an intense fog of stellar winds that makes escape near-impossible unless the winds subside. It's a real nasty piece of work of a planet too, nobody in their right mind would ever even get lost there!" Jaco laughed out, feeling quite intelligent for having come up with such a method for punishing the bad seed evildoers.
"Why don't you just kill them? I could snap their necks right now, I attacked them to kill, frankly, I'm surprised they survived the hit…" Chayote wondered.
"You can't just go around killing people, that's not the Galactic Patrolman way! Normally, I would bring them in to the Galactic Prison but these two are too dangerous because of their mental powers. It's best that we just strand them elsewhere, where they can't give their folks any bad ideas about attacking passing by tourists and eating their brains…" Jaco looked at the subdued pair and loaded them onto his spaceship at the back. "Tights will have to share a ship with Chayote for now though, just until we drop these off…"
"Tsk…" Chayote expressed her annoyance, "Fine, as long as it's not too far off of our path to the next Dragon Ball." She mumbled while picking up the fallen Ultimate Dragon Ball that Raichi had dropped after being dispatched of.
"Yay! Yoga!" Tights shot her fist out into the sky with a spry hop.