(A/N: Ahhh...my lovely reviewers...how I love thee! With out further adieu, here's the next chappie!)

Shinigami Goumon chewed the eraser of a random pencil that had popped out of seemingly no where.

Finding the next object of ridicule was proving more difficult than originally anticipated.

She gazed through the one-way glass.

"Victim, victim…" She murmured, "Gotta find a vict-AH-HAA!" she cried gleefully.

Her eyes zeroed in on her next target.

"There you are."

"Our next fatality-koff-I mean contestant is…TATSUKI! C'MONNN DOWN!"

The harisen wielding flame head dashed down the stool and sat down hard.

"Bring it on!" he yelled, "Gimme whatcha got!"

"Know Your Stars! Know Your Stars! Know Your Stars!"

"Tatsuki…he has the world's worst case of Pyrophobia!"

"What did you-Where the HELL ARE YOU, BITCH?" he yelled, "I DARE YA TA COME OUT HERE AND SAY THAT!"

"It's so sad…ever since his brother threw his teddy, Mr. Timothy Tudwell, into the fireplace…"

"I AM NOT AFRAID OF FIRE!" Tatsuki roared, jumping up and down, "IMMA FIRE USER FOR GODSAKE! AND WHO TH' FREAK IS TIMOTHY TUDWELL?"

"Hey, Tatsuki…your sleeve's on fire."

"Oh chyeah ri-YAAAAAAAAAH!" Tatsuki screamed, frantically slapping at the flames that had poofed out of nowhere.

"Who's not afraid of fire now?"

"Sh-shut uuuup." Tatsuki growled, blowing cool air onto his singed arm.

"Heh…Tatsuki…he wishes that Lord Hotohori would look his way! If only once!"

"I do NOT YOU SICK, TWISTED FUCK!" Tatsuki roared, "That's NURIKO, NOT ME!"

"Don't lose heart. Tatsuki! If you just show him your true feelings-"

"I'M NOT GAY DAMMIT!"

"Its okay, Tatsuki! We live in a far more liberal day and age! You don't have to deny who you are!"

"I LIKE MIAKA GODAMMIT!"

-BRAK-

A stage light collided with his head.

"Repeat that." Tamahome snarled, dangerous red ki glowing brightly around him.

"I…d-don't like anyone, d-d-damn it." Tatsuki stammered, blood dripping from the huge head wound.

"That's what I thought you said." Tamahome smirked, sittimg back down.

"Heh heh…Tatsuki…He secretly curses the Gods for having made him a man!"

"What? NOOOOO!" Tatsuki shouted, ripping out larges chunks of his hair, "IMMA MAN AN' DAMN PROUD OF IT!"

"Hey Tatsuki? Do and Nuriko share clothes?"

"SHUT-UP-SHUT-UP-SHUT-UUUUP-YOU-DISEMBODIED-VOICE-FROM-NO-WHERE!" Tatsuki sobbed, beginning to crumble.

"Do you have Miaka do your make up? Or is it Yui?"

Tatsuki was now in the fetal position, sobbing like a two year old.

"I think we're done here. Now you know...Tatsuki."

"Jeezus Tatsuki." Tamahome groaned, picking the weeping man up under the arm, "Yer makin' us all look bad."

"I thought I told you to keep that a secret." Nuriko snarled, smacking Tatsuki across the back of the head as helped Tamahome carry him away.

"That was fun!" Shinigami Goumon whooped, spinning around in the office chair, "Hee hee! Instant Tatsuki! Just add water! Hee hee hee!"

Crushing his teeny tiny little mind to powder had been ever so much fun.

No...wait...

Putting the Chinese warrior thru the grinder had been awesomely-fantastically fun.

Which gave her an idea.

Since she was on theChinese, why not just keep on pickin' on them?

"Hee hee hee!" Shinigami snickered, "And I know just the one."

"Our next contestant issss…SHAMPOO! COME ONNN DOWN!"

The purple hair Amazon pranced down bouncily, waving frantically to Ranma.

"Ranma-darling!" She called, giving a big smile.

"Know Your Stars! Know Your Stars! Know Your Stars!"

"Shampoo…she thinks that Ranma is the most vile, foul, despicable creature who ever walked God's green earth!"

"W-what?" Shampoo cried, pinking slightly, "That not true! Shampoo love Ranma-Darling!"

"Then how come you tried to kill him through half of Vol. 3?"

"Shampoo was not knowing is same Ranma!" the poor Chinese girl sputtered.

"A likely story."

"Is true!" Shampoo cried.

"Shampoo… she's afraid of cats!"

"I no afraid of cat!" Shampoo said huffily, "Husband is afraid of cat!"

"Oh, thanks a BUNCH, Shampoo!" Ranma shouted from the audience, "Tell the world why doncha?"

"Which means she afraid of herself!"

"You no listen to me?" Shampoo cried, "I no afraid of cat!"

"He's not your husband!" Ukyo yelled, lobbing several spatulas at the cat girl, "Ran-chan is MINE!"

"The poor, poor underprivelaged girl. Tsk. Sucks ta be her."

"Why you no listen?" Shampoo wailed.

"Oh SO?" Kodachi cried, bringing down a mallet millimeters away from where Ukyo stood, "Ranma sir is MY sugar baby!"

"Of all the springs you had to fall into, huh? Wow your unlucky!"

"I not afraid of cat!" Shampoo cried, on the verge of tears.

"WOULD YOU TWO KNOCK IT OFF!" Akane yelled, ripping up an unoccupied bleacher and swatting the pair away like flies.

"Shampoo…she's madly in love with Mousse."

"SHAMPOO!" Mousse cried, leaping up from the audience, "At long last, my feelings are reciprocated!"

"NO LISTEN! NO LISTEN!" Shampoo shrieked wrenching away from him, "IT LIE! IT LIIIIE!"

"SHAMPOOOOO!" Mousse shouted, chasing after her, running into several sound and light guys who put the nearsighted fighter back on the right track.

"Now you know…Shampoo!"

"La la la la la!" Shinigami sang, spinning at Mach 5 in her office chair, "Such fun! Such fun!"

She came to an abrupt stop when she realized-

"My muffins…" Goumon growled, "Who's the sick, twisted, fuck who ate MY chocolate muffins?"

She spotted Happosai through the one way glass distributing HER muffins throughout the audience.

"GRRRR!" Shinigami snarled, as she watched their putrid disgusting teeth tear into HER muffins, "DIE BIATCH!"

She slammed a hand down on a little magic button (red, btw).

Bolts of lightning electrocuted the majority of the audience.

Ash Ketchum and Pikachu strolled back from the Little Pokemon Master's Room to see the audience charred and smoking.

"So…whad we miss?" Ash asked brightly

"Nothin' much." Misty replied, immune to such shocks after paling around with Pikachu and ash all these years.

After the quick thinking of the stage crew, Shinigami Goumon had more muffins in her possession and was ready to continue.

"Our next contestant, all the way from the great country of Wales issss…NEGI SPRINGFIELD! COME ON DOWN, YA LITTLE CUTIE!"

A rather flustered ten year old stumbled down the stairs to the stage, blushing at the fangirls screams and almost tripping over his robes.

"Know Your Stars! Know Your Stars! Know Your Stars!"

"Negi…he harbors a huge vendetta against his staff!"

"I beg your pardon!" Negi sputtered, reddening slightly, "I most certainly do not! I like my staff very much!"

"Then why did I happen to see you attempting to break it in half over a boulder before the show?"

"No comment." Negi said quickly.

"Heh heh heh…Negi…he likes gerbils…"

"Yes!" Negi said, looking rather relieved, "Their quite cute!"

"…with ketchup and mustard!"

"NEGI!" Asuna shrieked, "That's disgusting!"

"How could you!" Nodoka sobbed, "The poor little things!"

"It's NOT true, Nodoka!" Negi yelled, "Don't listen to her!"

"Hey Ayaka…didn't you used have a gerbil named Mr. Twinkle Toes that "mysteriously" disappeared?"

"Mr. Twinkle Toes!" Ayake bawled, "NOOOO!"

"Don't listen to her lies!" Negi cried.

An avalanche of tomatoes and rotten food plummeted on his head from seemingly no where.

"ACK!" Negi squealed.

"That was for the gerbils!"

"Negi…he's actually a fifty-two year convicted child molester by the name of James Crenshaw!"

"How did you know?" Negi cried, his voice deepening.

"I am the all mighty voice! I know all! By the way, you should know that many of the members of our esteemed audience our police officials!"

Negi's eyes went wide.

"I'd start running, ya midget MJ wannabe!"

Negi hopped off the stool and out of the studio, an army of Officer Jenny's on his heels.

"Now you know…Negi!"

"We'll be back after this short commercial break! So don't go away!"

(A/N: Next Chapter Will have a short bit for totally made up commercials! Who will get bashed next? R&R)