Title: Our Song
Author: j-chan
Theme: chante a moi; sing to me #19 3/50
Rating: G
Warnings: fluff, shounen ai, 'awww' moment
Disclaimer: Gravitation and characters mentioned are not property of me, though I wish they were because then Suguru would be in the remixes, damnit! Also, I don't own the song, December Love Song. Gackt does.
Summary: Suguru is alone in the house near Christmas time after his lovers go out to shop. Sitting down at his piano, he starts playing a song and doesn't notice when his lovers come home.
Note: Italic lyrics is Suguru singing by himself, bold is all three singing together. If you want the song, e-mail me at the1jchanatgmaildotcom and I'll send a sample.
Our Song
The note on the table stared at me, as if mocking the fact that I had to work and my lovers did not. 'Suguru, we went out and will be back later. Love, Tatsuha and Ryuichi.' It was a simple note, but I felt a pang of sadness at it. We had been planning a night out together, the three of us alone, for a long time. Today was going to be that night, but then K kept us longer than anticipated. I guess Ryuichi and Tatsuha figured I wouldn't be home until after dinner again, like yesterday.
Sighing, I moved upstairs to put my things down and get comfortable in the house. It was winter, so I made sure to turn the heat on as I passed (we turn it off if all of us are out). Still, the warmth of the house wouldn't change my mood. My lover's arms were warmer than this. Alone, this house felt too big and too cold for me. I wish they'd come home sooner…
My feet took me to the room Ryuichi decorated just for me. There were posters of famous composers and bands that I liked all over the walls. The actually room was filled with any and all equipment I would need for my part of Bad Luck. An exact copy of my stage synth stood in the middle of the room, surrounded by wires and a computer. I loved this room, but the part I loved most about it was the baby grand piano that Ryuichi bought me for my birthday. That was sitting in the corner the furthest from the door with nothing else surrounding it. It was my sanctuary inside my sanctuary, if that made any sense.
Slowly, I made my way to the piano and ran my fingers around the edge; a small tradition I had with it before I played. This was my pride and joy, something I'd play any day over a synth to be honest. Moving to the front of it, I pulled out the bench carefully and sat down, raising the cover to the keys. The only sound in the room was the soft movements of the piano as I readied it to be played.
White keys stared at me, begging to be stroked. I felt my heart race, as it always did with my piano, and I knew that this would calm me until my lover's returned. I turned through my mind what I should play until my brain stopped on a song that the three of us declared ours. Smiling, I rested my hands on the keys and began to play, joining in with the words when it came time.
"The evening lights, coloring the nights busy avenues,
down the street brings back memories of you.
Now I am watching, as lovers pass me by,
finding your shadows, in the views of my eyes
Now I am here, all alone
Remembering the time we used to laugh together
in the fall of the cold
I still think of you,
Wondering if you feel the same."
Without realizing it, a small tear began to move down my face. I closed my eyes, trying to keep it inside; I didn't want the keys to get water spots nor did I want my lovers coming home to me crying like a child. I was too old for tears. Taking a deep breath, I continued with the music…
"Save, your smile for me,
even although you cry for me
Remember me and love me always
Love, and smile for me,
Hold on to all that we had
remembering and love me again."
How many times had Ryuichi said those exact words to Tatsuha and myself? Even before we had heard this song? Too many to count and I will continue to smile for him and remember him always. Tatsuha as well; they were both my world and I would never forget them. It hurt, now, to think of the time before I met them and the time where I was alone.
"I'm so depressed living , a quiet life now,
There is no one here, in which to hold hands,
or protect me from the cold"
My eyes jerked opened as I heard two voices join in on the last line. A smile broke out on my face as I saw Ryuichi and Tatsuha in the doorway, smiling brightly at me. Without missing a beat, I continued, never taking my eyes off them or their smiles.
"Feeling like this loneliness will tear me apart
I am waiting and looking for you voice
To get me out of the dark"
Snowflakes fall like the tears that running down my face
I wanna hold you just one more time
I think of you night and day
Wondering if you feel the same
Oh, ooh…"
"What are you doing home so early?" I asked as the lyrics came to a break. It wasn't the question I wanted to ask, but it was the first one out of my mouth.
Ryuichi shrugged, the smile never leaving his face. "K called us earlier and said that he was keeping you, so we left before lunch."
"I see…" I glanced down at the keys, watching my fingers move over them. Sometimes I wished K would just let me be with my lovers.
I glanced up as I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked into Tatsuha's eyes. "Suguru," he murmured, shifting to place a kiss on my head, "stop being such an idiot. You couldn't come along anyway."
I frowned, slowing the music just a tab since we were coming up to lyrics again. "Why not?"
"Silly, we were shopping for you. It's almost Christmas!"
"Being in the silence of the night
Fall into my arms and I'll hold you so tight
My kiss will guide our missing hearts
and tell me you'll love again"
Shopping for me for Christmas? Last year the three of us just indulged in each other and a nice dinner. Does that mean we're doing something different this year? I figured I might as well ask, but not until the song was over. This was still our song and my questions and insecurity would not ruin it. Especially during a Holiday Ryuichi enjoyed too much in America and now with us.
"Save, your smile for me,
even although you cry for me
remember me and love me always
Love, and smile for me,
Hold on to all that we had
remembering and love me again."
"I thought we were doing the same as last year," I said as the music began to die out on the piano.
Ryuichi shrugged and took a seat next to me. "We were going to surprise you, but I guess the surprise is ruined."
I frowned again, shifting over so Tatsuha could sit on the other side of me. "I don't understand."
"We expected to be home before you got home," Tatsuha explained. "We left the note as a 'just in case' because we know how you panic."
"I do not panic…"
"Yes you do."
I hated Tatsuha sometimes … but he was right. "So what's the surprise?"
Ryuichi grinned, turning my head and giving me a kiss. "You'll find out on Christmas, Suguru."
fin
Gackt – December Love Song