Chapter Fifteen: I Could Be Him
When I wake up,
I'm willing to take my chances on the hope you hate him,
More than you notice I wrote this for you.
You need him. I could be him...
I could be an accident but I'm still trying.
That's more than I can say for him.
Where is your boy tonight? I hope he is a gentleman.
Maybe he won't find out what I know:
You were the last good thing about this part of town.
Someday I'll appreciate in value, get off my ass and call you...
But for the meantime
I'll sport my brand new fashion of waking up with my clothes on
At 4:00 in the afternoon.
"Hey Gin!"
Harry burst into the heads common room during the third week of May. The sun was beaming, just matching the beam on Harry's face.
"Guess who Im meeting on Saturday!"
Ginny shook her head and gestured for him to continue.
"Delvin Excel! The England Seeker. And the rest of the team of course."
"Wow! That'd be so cool" Ginny grinned. Delvin Excel lived up to his name, as he was by far the best seeker in Europe.
"And guess who's coming with me?" Harry continued.
Ginny shrugged. Probably Ron, she thought, envy seeping through her.
"You!"
"Seriously!"
"Uh huh!"
Ginny leapt up and hugged Harry tightly, jumping around with excitement.
"Er gin? Is that good for the baby?" Harry asked.
"Good point," Ginny sat down again, suddenly feeling very tired. She was two months gone already, and she could see her body slowly gaining weight. In a month she would be showing a little and by July, she wouldn't be able to hide her bump. However as she would be home on the first of July, she wasn't worried.
"So, Saturday at three okay?"
"Okay!"
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Saturday arrived with the warmest weather and the clearest air of the summer so far.
What the hell do you wear to meet the English quidditch team? Thought Ginny frantically, as she delved through her closet.
"Ginny!" Harry called up to her for the fifth time that afternoon.
"c'mon! What's taking so long!"
"This…"
Harry, Ron and Hermione all stared at Ginny, as she descended the stairs. Looking at least two years older then normal, dressed in an elegant black shift dress and pretty silver sandals, she looked stunning; with her hair twisted up into a stylish knot at the back of her head.
"Wow gin. Your gonna turn some heads today" Harry grinned, slightly in awe.
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Harry's prediction had been nearly right. Ginny in fact turned every head, especially one in particular.
"Little Ginny Weasley! My my, how we've grown!"
"Ollie! How are you?"
Ginny grinned as she was swept up into the arms of Oliver Wood. Ex Gryffindor and old family friend. He had been a year above the twins at Hogwarts, making him a good five years her senior. However his boyish good looks and easy charm made him easy to talk to. His immature sense of humour helped a little too.
"Im fantastic! Im the English quidditch team keeper! I couldn't be better!" he beamed and Ginny laughed at his enthusiasm.
"But you look great," he continued, "What's brought on this then? Love?"
Ginny smiled.
"No, just a realisation that no matter how many things go wrong, Im still incredibly lucky." She replied.
"None of this philosophical stuff, gin." Oliver laughed, "C'mon, let's introduce you to the team and grab a coffee somewhere"
Ginny allowed herself to be led over to the other team members and introduced by Oliver.
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Sitting across from Oliver, in a quaint coffee house, in London, Ginny was struck by how good looking he really was.
Soft brown hair, which curled into his dark hazel eyes. Freckles that danced across his deeply tanned skin, and more muscles then you could count, made up this wholly knee trembling image.
"Are you okay?" Oliver's eyes were suddenly on Ginny, peering curiously at her, as all of a sudden she realised she was staring at him.
"Yes, sorry. I was miles away" She smiled.
"Me too. I was thinking how incredibly beautiful you are" he said casually, making her blush slightly.
"That was cheesy Mr. Wood!" she mocked gently and he grinned.
"Well what did you expect?" he chuckled.
"But seriously," he continued slowly, "would you go out with me sometime. Meet up for a drink or something?"
Ginny fiddled nervously with her napkin.
"Ollie – I would love to but you've gotta hear me out okay," she replied as he nodded, looking at her intently.
"About six months ago I fell in love. With Draco Malfoy."
Oliver's jaw dropped.
"But he's …….dead? Isn't he? Im sorry gin"
"Thanks. Yes, Draco is gone, and im kinda getting past it now and those feelings I had for him. In fact, I kept wishing all afternoon that you would want to see me again."
Oliver smiled but Ginny stopped him.
"Oh Oliver, there's something that might change your mind."
"What?" he asked earnestly.
"Well…… im …….im pregnant."
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Ginny sat there for a long time whilst Oliver processed her last sentence.
Finally he spoke.
"Gin, certainly it's a bit of a shock of course. But I still want to see you."
Ginny looked up into Oliver's eyes. Oliver who shed known for years; who's helped teach her to ride a broom; who'd sent her homemade birthday cards, when they were little.
"I know you may still love Draco, but maybe in time, it could be me instead?" he murmured.
Ginny continued to gaze at him.
"I don't…… I mean, I can't still love Draco" she muttered, as if voicing the thought for the very first time.
"How can I love a memory? What I don't have?"
"Gin….." Oliver's voice carried a hint of a reluctant tone, as he if didn't want her to push her feelings for him.
"Ollie. Come and meet me at Hogwarts tomorrow and we can, I don't know, hang out or something? Have a drink?" she said finally and Oliver nodded.
"Okay great. Eleven okay for you?"
"Perfect"
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Ginny smiled contentedly as she lounged back on the grassy slope next to the lake. After Oliver had been rampaged by several hormonal and lust filled teenage girls, all of whom wanted an autograph, the pair had settled down by the lake, with a drink and had instantly bonded.
"I can't believe you said that McGonagall!" Ginny laughed, as Oliver finished recounting his tale from his sixth year.
"Yeah, neither could she" he chortled.
"This has been fun," Ginny smiled up at him, then froze as he unexpectedly leaned forward, placing an awkward but tender kiss on her lips. Little by little she found herself kissing him back, guardedly.
"Oliver, I can't do this"
She stood and began to stride back towards the castle.
"Ginny! Wait," Oliver called, darting after her, "talk to me. What's wrong?"
"Go home Oliver, just go. I can't explain and I don't want to"
And with that she bounded up the steps and inside the castle walls.
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"So what do you want to do tonight?"
Blaise and Hermione sat as close as was possible, in regards to the potions curse, on the heads couch, staring aimlessly into space.
Hermione shrugged.
"How about?" Blaise started, but Hermione cut him off.
"You know that time turner only worked the one time"
Blaise blushed.
"How do you know that's even what I was going to ask?" he cried, on the defensive. Hermione gave him a bold look and he sighed.
"Well, im sorry if I come across a bit sex mad – but have you met my girlfriend!" he grinned slyly, and Hermione blushed this time.
"So, what do you want to do?" Blaise repeated.
"I think I want to go see professor Snape…"
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"What," Blaise exclaimed, "I mean I know I haven't been able to provide all my usual boyfriendy perks, but replacing me with Snape! Im ashamed!"
"Shut up Blaise!", Hermione screeched, whacking him with a cushion.
"No, I had an idea to do with the curse that I want to run past him"
Blaise eyed her suspiciously.
"Well, alright then, but if I catch you in white wedding meringue, and Snape in a top hat there will be trouble!"
"Deal"
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"Sir, I read that if one of the links of a curse dies, then it is often lifted? Is that true?"
Snape heaved a sigh at his most intelligent but arguably his most annoying student.
"Yes miss granger, that is quite correct – now who did you want to kill?"
Hermione sent him a livid evil, then her eyes widened.
"Well actually sir, have you ever heard of the cessation tear?" she asked, offhandedly, and watched as Snape's eyes enlarged.
"Where did you hear of that? Its incredibly dark magic!" he growled.
"In one of the books in Dumbledore's office, entitled "severe del cessationa", it sounded intriguing"
"Ill say", Snape glowered at her.
"Miss Granger, you are not permitted to make such an enchantment. It could be highly dangerous, not to mention impossibly illegal! There are so many complications that a seventeen year old witch could not overcome easily and of course-"
Hermione interrupted him mid rant.
"Sir, im not suggesting I make it," she smirked, "im suggesting that you make it"
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"I can't believe you asked Snape outright like that!" Harry laughed as Hermione recounted the afternoon's events to Harry, Ginny and Ron, who had joined her and Blaise in the heads common room.
The common room had become an official meeting point for the five, once classes had finished for the day. Blaise had all but moved in to Hermione's room, and Ron and Harry hated the Gryffindor common room without Hermione and Ginny.
The pair's relationship with Blaise had changed too. They no longer saw him as a Slytherin, the enemy; but as a mate and a close one at that. Hew made Hermione happy and she loved him, so they had called a time out on their grudge.
"I can't believe he agreed to it" Hermione replied, failing to disguise her complete delight.
Snape had reluctantly agreed to make the cessation tear enchantment for either Harry or Blaise to drink. Hermione had been incredibly surprised and had to use all of her will power to maintain her authoritative confidence over the potions teacher.
"Evening all", Everyone's heads turned as professor Dumbledore clambered into the heads quarters.
"Hi professor," Hermione smiled, "we were just discussing the enchantment"
Dumbledore looked decidedly tired, Hermione thought, as she watched him cast a darkened look across the two black haired boys. It was remarkable how similar they really were.
"Can I ask which of you two is going to endure the cessation tear enchantment?" he asked, exhaustedly, and Blaise raised a casual hand. Harry looked at him in surprise.
"But –"he began, but Blaise stopped him, shaking his head.
"My turn Harry" he answered, and followed Dumbledore to Hermione's bedroom, where he would explain how the tear worked.
"I can't believe he's going to do this" Harry gaped after him.
Ron shrugged.
"Sometimes other people just need to be able to take the stand"
Harry stared curiously at his best friend.
"Do I always take the stand Ron? Is this what this is about? The limelight!" he cried, frustrated.
Ron kept quiet for a bit, then nodded.
"I know you don't ask for it", He said, at Harry's furious expression, "but sometimes it's hard, just standing to the right of you, mate."
"Is this why you went to the chess tournament?" Harry asked softly and Ron's eyes widened.
"How did you know about that?"
Harry handed him a yellowing copy of "magical sports express", the wizarding sports paper, and Ron flipped it open.
SURPRISE CHAMPION!
Screamed the headline.
Seventeen year old Ronald Weasley, surprised chess fans yesterday, by taking home the most elusive prize a junior chess player can receive. In a fierce battle between………….
"Congratulations mate" Harry beamed and Ron blushed.
"Thanks, it was nothing really. And I certainly don't envy your limelight, shall we say!"
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Blaise sat on Hermione's bed, processing Dumbledore's explanation of the cessation tear.
He would take the first part of the enchantment – a tiny tear drop sized potion – which would stop his emotions and feelings, then an spell would be said, freezing his blood and stopping his brain activity, then an orb, made of frozen tears would be placed directly above his heart, stopping it for the briefest of moments. This would allow him to die for just a few seconds and the curse to be broken, before the orb was lifted, the spell reversed and him to return to life, as if nothing had happened.
The loss of emotions and feelings however was different. The emotions he would have returned to him were only those that ran deep in his veins – true friendships, parental affection, and true love. Superficial feelings would not return.
Blaise thought about all the shallow friendships he'd made in Slytherin, his relationships with teachers he didn't respect or admire, people he didn't love would change and disappear, making it hard for him to rekindle his patience with those people.
On the other end of the scale, however, those true emotions would be stronger then ever and in the first eight hours after he was resurrected, he would feel extraordinary bursts of emotions – good and bad.
"Okay", he said finally, "I want to do this"
Dumbledore nodded. The Zabini boy was a brave one – braver maybe then Harry.
"You realise that you may lose your feelings for miss granger all together and your friendships with Harry, Ronald and Ginny?" he pointed out kindly.
Blaise simply grinned.
"Sir, I do not need to die and be resurrected to know what true friendships and love feel like"
"And then, I have the utmost respect for you Mr. Zabini"
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The tiny drop of the bright blue potion made Blaise shiver, as he swallowed, and he instantly felt……….well nothing. He thought of Hermione – nothing. Of Draco – nothing. His parents –still nothing. All his emotions had actually gone.
"Ok Mr. Zabini – in two minutes all will be well. Are you ready?"
Blaise nodded.
"I love you Blaise" he heard Hermione whisper, but couldn't reply, as he didn't feel the slightest fragment of love towards her, due to the potion. To him her words just sounded surreal.
Dumbledore quickly began to chant the words of the spell, in their Latin form, and Hermione and the others watched in horror as the words cut themselves into Blaise's flesh, gleaming red with blood, then they all gasped as the trickles of blood suddenly froze. Blaise's eyes glazed over.
"He is officially brain dead at the moment" Dumbledore informed them, and Hermione helplessly burst into tears.
Snape quickly, placed a scintillating silver orb onto Blaise's chest, above his heart and his head fell to the side. He was dead.
"Miss granger" Snape said, coolly, and Hermione dashed forward, placing a hand on Blaise's torso. The spell had been broken.
Instantaneously, Snape salvaged the orb, as Dumbledore repeated the spell, flipside, and Blaise's eyes fluttered open once again.
"Blaise!" Hermione launched herself into Blaise's arms.
"It worked!" he exclaimed, "wow….. I can't believe I just died. It was surreal"
"What did you see?" Ron asked curiously.
"The fiery pit of hell" Blaise grinned wickedly, and Hermione laughed.
"You're not going to hell" she chortled.
"Oh believe I am!", Blaise replied, "It's a hell of a lot more fun then heaven. They have crazy golf!" he laughed, mockingly.
Dumbledore then cleared his throat.
"Mr. Zabini, I suggest you spend the next eight hours in the hospital wing – you will be subjected to some unbelievably harsh emotional experiences shortly and I have asked poppy to keep a close watch over you, during that time."
Blaise nodded in concurrence and followed Dumbledore to the medical wing, whilst Hermione and the others celebrated their success.
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The next eight hours were hell for Blaise.
He relived the day he was told he had been adopted and the pain and confused mess of thoughts that had caused.
He thought of Hermione and had screamed as he thought his heart was about to burst with love and happiness. He wanted to ask her to marry him right there and then. To see her and to hold her and never let go.
He thought about Draco; his best friend, and he sobbed and thrashed about for hours in relived grief.
Thoughts of his new friendships with Harry, Ron and Ginny flashed through his head, making him feel so wanted and accepted, that he had a grin plastered to his face for half an hour, making him appear incredibly idiotic.
When he thought of Voldemort – who had forced him to kill, to take the dark mark, he had jumped out of bed, screaming for him to be murdered, and frightening madam Pomfrey so much that she had bound him magically to his bed, until the moment passed.
Finally he fell asleep exhausted and in a fragile state of mind and dreamt of nothing.
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Ginny Weasley had never felt as preoccupied as she did tonight. There was little need for her worries really. She was surrounded by fantastic friends and family. She had great grades and was about to become a mother – something she couldn't wait to do. However, it was her encounter with Oliver wood that had left her confused and lonely.
She tiptoed across to the fire place in the heads common room and ignited it with glowing green flames, with a handful of floo powder.
"Brett?" she whispered into the flames, and slowly a head coagulated into view.
"Hey Ginny"
As Ginny smiled at Brett's friendly face, she rapidly felt her restlessness ebb away. Brett's letter, in reply to her own, hastily scribbled plea for support, had made her feel more secure then she had felt previously since Draco's death. It was as if Brett had made everything alright.
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A/N:
So Harry's met his idol, Ginny's realised that replacing Draco isn't as easy as she'd thought. Blaise and Hermione's curse has been lifted by a dangerous enchantment and Oliver wood has gone home unhappy.
A likely friendship has been formed between Harry, Ron and Blaise and Ginny has sought comfort in Brett – the very American American!
In the next chapter…….
Exams are a go go!
Hogwarts is under attack.
Harry faces his biggest challenge ever.
Blaise commits.
Ginny tells all.
And life as we know it changes forever.