SUBURBAN LANDSCAPE. WE ZOOM IN ON NIGEL AND MONTY'S POLICE CAR. IT IS PARKED IN A POLICE STATION PARKING LOT

Another car, this one grey, pulls into the lot. Two adults exit from it. They are wearing dark green military fatigues, black trench masks with bright white eyepieces and black stetson hats. Dark green clubs and spray cans are clipped to their belts.

Officers Mikado and Touton usher Nigel and Monty (still handcuffed) them out of the car and towards the strangers.

GUARD 1
These are the trespassers?

OFFICER TOUTON
They are. Thank you for coming on such short notice.

GUARD 2
It was no trouble, officers. We appreciate the help.

Officer Mikado nods.

Nigel and Monty board the grey car, as do the guards. The driver presses a button. The car sprouts wings and rocket engines and blasts off.

AN HOUR LATER. THE GREY CAR IS FLYING OVER MOUNTAINOUS WILDERNESS. IT CROSSES A MOUNTAIN CRATER LAKE AND A DESCENDS INTO A VALLEY, TOWARDS A JUVENILE HALL FACILITY. THE FACILITY CONSISTS OF A CENTRAL TOWER, A COURTYARD, AND AN OUTER WALL. THE TOWER IS AS TALL AND WIDE AS THE EMPIRE STATE BUILDING. IT CONTAINS NO WINDOWS

The car flies towards the ground adjacent to the walls. Guard 1 presses some numbers on a dialled. A sliding door opens, revealing a tunnel. Then car enters it. Within a few seconds, it reaches a subterranean hangar. It flies a further one hundred feet, touches down and comes to a halt.

The guards pull Nigel and Monty out of the car. They take a look around. The hangar stretches as far as the eye can see. It is filled with flying cars and sleek, grey spaceships. The bottom part of the wall behind them is lined with clunky grey barrels of some sort.

GUARD 1
Get a move on. We don't have all day.

MONTY
Where are we going?

GUARD 2
The warden's office. He's waiting for you.

MONTY
(with cautious enthusiasm)
He must be planning to apologise to us! Nigel old chap, we'll be back home in time for a late supper.

The man and woman take them to an elevator. They travel to the top floor, emerge onto a vast corridor and walk for a minute until they reach a metal door. The door slides open with a swoosh, revealing an office.

The woman removes Nigel and Monty's handcuffs and pushes them forward.
GUARD 1
Get in.

Monty and Nigel do as they are told. They look around. The office is about the size of a garage. Everything about it is symmetrical, from its portraits and chairs to its desk and carpet. It is also inky blue.

MR. PARAGON
Take a seat.

Nigel and Monty jump. There's a grey-bearded man sitting behind the desk. They hadn't noticed him because he blends in with his surroundings: except for his beard and hair, he's entirely inky blue, including his skin.

Mr PARAGON
(gesturing towards two plastic stools in front of his desk)
Take a seat.

Nigel and Monty obey him.

MR PARAGON
Welcome to Greyrock Correctional Centre. I'm Mr. Paragon, the warden. You're going to be living with us for the next six months, so let me explain a few –

NIGEL Skip the formalities, Mr. Paragon. I know how things work around here. Why's your skin blue?

Mr Paragon gives a cynical smile.
MR PARAGON
That's what happens when you lie too much. Your tongue turns blue, first temporarily, then permanently. And if you keep going, the blueness spreads to the rest of your body. Mom and dad warned me it would happen, but I didn't listen.

NIGEL
(scoffing)
I've heard your story before, and I think it's hogwash. You probably overdosed on Blurpleberry Supreme.

MR PARAGON
(giving another cynical smile)
I thought the story was hogwash too, until the spots started appearing on my body and I saw blue wherever I went. But don't worry, we won't let you end up like me. At Greyrock, we teach you to never tell a lie. Cooperate, and your lives will be only somewhat miserable.

MONTY
(fidgeting)
Now see here, Mr. Paragon, there's been a mistake. I'm not really thirteen years old. I've been zapped into a child by my psychopathic brother.

MR PARAGON
(raising his eyebrows)
Zapped into a child?

MONTY
(eagerly)
Yes. With a cigar of some sort.

MR PARAGON
(sighing)
Monty, I just explained to you we don't accept lying here. Weren't you listening?

MONTY
But it's not a lie! If cars can fly and people can turn blue, is an aging cigar really so hard to believe?

MR PARAGON
(in a threatening tone)
Monty, I'm warning you, you're pushing your luck.

MONTY
I want to speak to a lawyer, or you're going to be in big trouble.

Nigel facepalms.

MR PARAGON
(sighing again)
Alright Monty. Tomorrow at lunch, you will undergo spinach therapy. You will eat a plate of spinach. If you don't clean your plate, we'll feed you to our peanut butter monster.

NIGEL
(politely)
Uh, Mr. Paragon, can you go easy on my dad – on Monty? He's not used to being a kid.

MR PARAGON
(taken aback)
Are you saying he's telling the truth?

NIGEL Well yeah, I am.

MR PARAGONOh good. You can have spinach therapy together.

NIGEL
(indignantly)
Now wait a minute, that's not fair!

MR PARAGON
(sharply)
Two days of therapy, then. Shall we make it a whole week?

Nigel and Monty maintain a resentful silence.

MR PARAGON
That's what I thought.

Mr Paragon reaches under his desk and produces two grey cardboard boxes.

MR PARAGON
I know you kids probably think of me as an evil overlord, and I am one. But I also have a soft side. Case in point, all new inmates get a welcome kit (he extends the boxes to Nigel and Monty, and they take them).

MR PARAGON
The guards outside the office will give your uniforms and get you settled in.

He waves his hand.

MR PARAGON
Now get out of my sight.

TIME SKIP.

NIGEL AND MONTY ARE BEING ESCORTED THROUGH A JAILBLOCK BY A GUARD. THEY'RE WEARING ORANGE UNIFORMS AND CARRYING THEIR WELCOME KITS

The jail block is buzzing with excitement. Inmates who pass by Nigel are exchanging whispered questions and comments with each other ("Is this really Numbuh One?" "I've only ever seen him from a distance" "How did Numbuh Zero get captured?" "He must be here to do some reconnaissance work, prepare a jailbreak."

The guard stops between two empty and open cells.

GUARD
Get in.

Nigel walks into the left-hand cell, and Monty the other. The guard slams the doors shut.

Nigel sits down on his bed and opens his box. It contains grey slippers, a couple sheets of paper with grey crayons, carrot juice, 200 % dark chocolate, a $50 Evil Adult Industries coupon, and an Evil Adult Industries catalogue. Pretty underwhelming, but at least he can use the paper to build paper airplanes.

TWO MINUTES LATER

The cells have narrow slits for mail. Nigel opens his.

NIGEL
How are you getting on, dad?

A moment passes, then Monty opens his slit.

MONTY
This isn't a dream, is it? I keep expecting to wake up.

NIGEL
Nope, it's not a dream. But it's not as bad as you think.

MONTY
What's happening? What is this nightmare? What's the Kids Next Door?

NIGEL
Would you like me to explain now, talking out of a mail slit?

MONTY
No. I want to speak face-to-face.

NIGEL
Well the guards said dinner's already finished. So I guess we'll see each other at breakfast.

MONTY Alright. I can wait until morning.

Nigel closes his slit. Then he hears an echoey knock on his cell's left wall. Nigel listens closely. The sound comes again.

ACE
Is that you, Nigel Uno?

NIGEL Who is it?

ACE
You tried to recruit me last year. Remember?

ACE
(with some excitement)Ace...I do remember you. How did you end up in here?

ACE(bitterly)
I flew over one of Mr. Boss's factories. I was just minding my own business, but he accused me of spying. I've been here for eleven months.

NIGEL(treading carefully)
How bad has it been?

ACE
What do you care? You never even tried to set me free.

NIGEL
That's not true! We launch rescue attempts once a month, but we can't rescue everyone. The security forces are really strong, and they get stronger every time.

ACE
But you're the Kids Next Door! You're supposed to be so powerful. You can shoot mustard from space. You have bases in every country of the world. You – you have a base on the moon!

NIGEL
It's not that simple. We have a whole planet to protect. We can't focus all our resources on a single jail. You would know that if you'd accepted my invitation.

ACE
Yeah, yeah, sure.

A moment of silence.

ACE
Anyway, I thought I'd give you the heads up, most of the kids in here view you as a hero. They'll be expecting you to lead a riot.

NIGEL
Well they're gonna be disappointed. I don't plan on sticking around. Hopefully, my friends will rescue me.

ACE Must be nice to be that important.

NIGEL(hastily)
If I can take you with me, I will.

ACE
Thanks, I guess.

A beat

ACE Maybe you should stay. If you escape, they'll come looking for you. They'll offer a reward for your capture. You're only here for six months, right?

NIGEL I'm not wasting six months of my life!

ACE
It's up to you. But if I were you, I'd play it safe.

Nigel shakes his head and turns away from the wall. He sits down on his bed, removes his glasses and presses a tiny button located on one of the object's hinges.

In Numbuh 65.3's office, on the Moonbase, an alarm goes off.