The week had begun off fine, she had felt a surge of confidence, a pep in her step. In class, she was much more active, raising her hand and answering like a proper student. Outside of class, socially, she was a little butterfly. Flitting between people and speaking on different topics with a bright smile.
The boys had definitely enjoyed it, considering she was helping them with plotting their upcoming pranks, and seemed much more willing. Not just that, but she was much more affectionate with them. It was strange, but they knew better than to complain.
After class with Professor Snape, Cyra stayed behind and waited patiently for her dose of wolfsbane. This was going much better than she had expected it would. The potion was disgusting, but she knew it was better for her tastebuds to suffer if it meant she would have control. She was still nervous about what would happen when the full moon came that week, but she had plenty of time till then, so she'd enjoy this while it lasted.
After she took a swig of the vial, she was sent away to her next class. She didn't notice Professor Snape's stare as she exited, calculating and almost waiting.
The next day, she woke up feeling a bit more tired than usual, but still felt pretty okay. Buttoning up her uniform, she set out about her day. She had a light class schedule today, so she'd find herself to visit Hagrid, maybe have some tea.
I wouldn't dare touch those horrid biscuits though. She giggled to herself, before she froze. That wasn't her. That was her voice, sure, but it wasn't her. She wouldn't think something so mean about Hagrid. After a moment, she didn't hear anything else. Deciding to shrug it off, she continued on her way. For the rest of the day, there were no snide comments, so she figured it must have just been her having a mean moment.
She ate the biscuits though, as a way to apologize to the unknowing Hagrid.
"COME ON LUPIN, YOU'RE GOING TO BE LATE!"
Honestly, can they hear themselves? Sounding like a bunch of shrieking birds. Cyra's eyes were open, staring up at the canopy above her bed with furrowed brows. Even as her roommates rushed out, slamming the door behind them, she paid no mind.
Something was wrong. Sitting up, she rubbed her tired eyes, trying to focus. She needed to get to her classes, having already missed breakfast. The twins must have been worried about her disappearance. Or they probably haven't even noticed, too busy with their new friend Lee. Cyra felt her heart sink at the thought, her hands dropping onto the bed. They had been spending a lot of time with the boy, but they still tried to make time for her. Plus, with them spending time with him, they didn't cause another fit about her spending time with Cedric.
Allowing that to raise her spirits, she pushed open the curtains to face the day. The very blinding day, causing her to wince and shut her eyes. I could just stay here, would anyone really notice? No, they definitely would. Hopping up, she hurried over to the vanity in the room, snatching up her brush to quickly snag through the curls.
As she looked around, trying to ignore the pain in her scalp, she caught the poster for Hufflepuff her roommates made. Tomorrow was the first game against Slytherin. I'm going to have to listen to Cedric droning on about Quidditch today. Her head shot up to face the mirror. That was not her thoughts. She didn't enjoy Quidditch as much as Cedric, but she would never say that about him!
A horrified gasp left her as she saw how bright her eyes were, like shimmering gold. She looked like a predator in the night. I am a predator. Gulping, she steadied her hands on the vanity, the brush tumbling from her fingers and onto the floor. Sitting herself down, she did her best to take in deep breaths. It wasn't so obvious that they would be able to tell. She was fine.
Plus, they aren't exactly the sharpest brooms in the shed.
"SHUT UP!" She shrieked, hitting the vanity with her fist, causing all of the cosmetics to spill onto the ground. She began to pant, gritting her teeth as she tried to calm the burning pain in her chest. Everything was going great, why was this happening? Why was she hearing voices? It wasn't like she had a separate personality. Unless.
Looking back up the mirror, she stared intensely at her reflection, waiting for something. Anything. But nothing happened. She looked the same. Well, despite the glowing eyes. Still, it did nothing to settle her nerves. Something was seriously wrong. And she needed to speak to Moony about it.
At that, she rushed over to her nightstand, snatching out a quill and parchment before frantically scribbling a letter. If she sent it now, she'd have an answer hopefully by the midday. Once Biscuit was sent out with it, she got herself ready and headed out the door.
As she entered Herbology, she apologized quietly to Professor Sprout for being late before taking her seat beside George. They often switched places in class, she paid no mind, knowing it was their quirky way to prank the teachers.
"Hey, you okay?" He whispered to her, looking over her with furrowed brows. She managed a nod, shoving her gloves on quickly, "Yeah, absolutely." Keeping her head down, she motioned to the book he had open, "So, what are we doing today?" He didn't press her any further, beginning to explain what she missed.
During the class, she did fairly well to keep her cool. She felt George's scent had something to do with it, it almost had a drugging effect for her. Inhaling the smell of oranges, she felt the clawing in her chest cease. When he spoke to her, she did her best to pay attention, answering with short responses before getting back to work. The entire time, they did not once make eye contact.
Once she was in the hallways, the feeling returned, hitting her full force. Stumbling to grab onto the wall, she gasped for breath, it felt like her ribs were on fire. Digging her nails into the stone, she felt the anger flood through her veins. Anger at her situation, at having no answers. Students passed her, paying no mind to the scene she was causing.
As usual. Always so selfish. They'll never understand. Biting down a growl, she forced herself back up onto her feet. Going in the opposite direction than her class, she forced her curls to cover her face. She needed answers, and now.
Reaching her destination, she knocked impatiently on the door, letting out angry puffs of air. As it swung open, she didn't bother to say hi, instead she barged right in.
"Miss Lupin, while I am sure your father didn't bother to teach you manners, you must at least have the basic skill to say hello."
And he should have the basic skill to shampoo his greasy hair. Cyra groaned, holding her head as she sat down in an empty seat, gritting out, "Hello Professor Snape." He watched her with furrowed brows, before taking her hands away, "Look at me, child." As soon her eyes met him, he seemed to have a moment of shock before schooling his features.
"Tell me, Miss Lupin, do you feel angry?"
A scoff left her, taking her hands from his grasp, "Angry? I feel like I see nothing but red!" She clutched at her chest, trying to take deep breaths to calm herself. He said nothing, going over to the cabinet and plucking out the vial of wolfsbane, before placing it before her.
Glaring at the blue vial, she pressed her lips tightly together, "Are we sure this is helping? What if it's making it worse?" He said nothing, staring down at her, almost seeming worried. Hearing no response, she allowed herself a self-demeaning smile before she popped the cork off and downed it.
As she gagged and coughed, he took out his wand, whispering something before sending a wispy blue smoke out of the room. Once she had calmed down, she sat there, waiting. But the burning was still there, the anger was still there. Feeling the tears prick behind her eyes, she looked up at him with panicked eyes, "Why am I feeling this way!?"
Professor Snape let out a sigh, looking away, "I don't know, Miss Lupin. The wolfsbane has helped your eyes diminish, but I am afraid that is all I can do." That was it? She stared at him in shock. He was supposed to be able to help her. He was the Professor. Why is he so useless? She gritted her teeth, trying to will her own thoughts away.
"I can't do anything else for you, but someone can. I've called your father here; he should have gotten my message by now." He continued, watching as she visibly relaxed at the mention of her father. Letting out a shaky sigh, she looked away from him, "I hope so.."
And he was. Before she could speak again, he was stumbling out of the floo, the green flames chasing him. He paid no mind, pushing past Snape to get to his pup. As she was seized up in his arms, she felt the tears streak her cheeks, "Papa.." He shushed her, petting her head comfortingly, "Oh Cyra, it's okay. I'm here."
He was shaking, clinging to her like she was his lifeline. Panic seized her, the worst thoughts crossing her mind. Was she dying?! Pulling herself away, she stared at him worried, "Papa, what's wrong with me?" Remus could tell right away what she was thinking, grasping her cheeks with his hands, "Shh, you're okay. I mean that, Cyra. I can explain what's happening to you. It's all normal." At Professor Snape's scoff, he quickly corrected it, "For us, I mean. For people like us."
Cyra swallowed thickly, panting out, "Werewolves, you mean? For people like us, werewolves?" He gave an ashamed nod before continuing, "I had thought we had time to talk about this during Christmas break, or perhaps when you turned thirteen, but it seems to be beginning now."
Squeezing her eyes shut, she shook her head against his hands, "W-What is happening to me?" Remus watched her, his eyes as kind as always, "You're feeling angry. Like something is burning inside, trying to claw its way out?" She nodded, "Are you hearing any voice?" At that, her eyes shot open, looking at him in shock. He really did know what was happening.
"Yes!" She replied in excitement, "I'm not crazy? It's so mean, the voice, it's like it wants me to be angry at everyone." Remus nodded along, smiling sadly at her, "Yes, I know that well. That's your wolf speaking to you." Cyra looked at him strangely, waiting for an explanation. She's been a werewolf since she was six and she had never felt this way, or heard voices like this before. She was irritable, but never to this degree. Why now?
"You see, the reason I had thought this would come later is cause..well." He trailed off, glancing over at Snape uncomfortably, "Well. Because it would mean you're going through puberty." Cyra was so confused, and even more so when Professor Snape seemed to cough, looking very embarrassed.
"I'll give you both the room, Lupin. I do not believe I should be here for this." Professor Snape cut in, not even allowing Remus a word in before he hurried out, the door shut quickly behind him. Once it was just them, Cyra piped in, "What is puberty?"
Taking a seat at the other desk, Remus looked away uncomfortably, "Well.. um. It is a stage where you begin to grow..into a young woman." She gave a slow nod, trying to wrap her head around this, "That's why my wolf is coming out?"
"Kinda."
"Kinda?" She repeated, staring at him. Remus seemed to squirm, looking at anything but her, "Your wolf comes out when you begin to hit sexual maturity.." Cyra let out an irritated growl, narrowing her eyes, "Papa you need to explain! I don't know what any of this means!"
He couldn't help but pity her, she must have been terrified this morning. Finally facing her, he gave her a weak smile, "You're right, I'm sorry." With a clear of his throat, he began, "Okay, so, typically puberty happens differently for boys and girls. I underestimated the time limit for you, because as a boy, I went through mine much later."
She nodded slowly, listening intently to him. "You may have noticed that you and the boys are very different. You have different parts." He motioned to her, waiting for her response. Cyra understood this, nodding quickly, "Yes! They don't have boobies!" He choked back a laugh, nodding along, "Very good. Well, they have different parts down there too. And that is your reproduction parts. Both used together, can create a child, which is called reproduction."
Cyra was sucked in now, staring intensely as his explanation seemed to reveal so many answers she had before but never asked. "So," He continued, "In order for you to have a child, your body has to go through sexual maturity. Girls happen a lot sooner cause there is a lot of stuff that must happen. For instance, the budding of the chest. I explained that to you when we got training bras earlier this year."
Cyra glanced down at her chest, staying silent. Remus took no notice, "The next thing would be growth of body hair, and then..well." He gulped, forcing himself to remain calm, "A period." Cyra was confused at that, she had never heard of that before. What was a period?
Seeing the question on her face, he explained, "A period happens because of changes in hormones. These hormones cause your uterus lining to build up, and it waits for a fertilized egg, but because there isn't one, it will then shed. You will see some blood, that is the lining. You will feel discomfort, or perhaps some painful cramps, but there are things to help assist it. Along with sanitaries to help capture the blood."
Once he finished, he waited for her reaction, feeling his heart break when he saw the fear in her expression. She had her arms wrapped around her abdomen, looking at him with wide eyes, "That sounds awful.." He nodded, smiling sadly at her, "Yes, but it only lasts 5 days a week, and happens once a month." As he said that, he realized how awful it did sound. She was going to have to deal with both a period and transforming once a month?
She seemed to understand this, the horror clear on her face, "B-But.. that'll be a while, right?" At his silence, she gasped, "Or..is it about to happen now? Is that why the wolf is appearing?" Remus couldn't do anything besides nod, allowing her a moment to let it sink in.
Cyra stared down at her hands, the shame seeping from her. Why did she have to deal with this right now? She just got to Hogwarts, and was having such a fun time. Remus slid from his seat, sinking down on his knees before her, "Cyra?" He tilted up her chin to look at him, "Cyra, I swear you're going to be okay. This isn't the most pleasant experience, but I know you can get through it. I don't know exactly when you'll get a period, but I can help you through it, just like I'm going to help you deal with the wolf. I'm in your corner, I'm with you."
Letting out a shuddering breath, she nodded quickly, grasping at his sweater for stability, "So what do I do, Papa?" At that, he launched into explaining once again, "During this week, you're going to be dealing with it. It'll say things that you know you would never say, but you have to remember it is not you. You need to take breaks, time to breath. I always liked going outside and just breathing in the air. The wolf will enjoy it too, it feels more at home outside."
Cyra listened carefully, remembering how she felt when she smelled George, "Can a person do that too? Calm you down?" Remus's eyes lit up at that, "Yes, they can. You don't feel angry with me right? Do you feel the burning?"
At that, she realized she hadn't. There was no anger, no voice. Looking back at him, she smiled brightly, "No, I don't." Remus chuckled, petting her curls lovingly, "That's because your wolf recognizes me. We're family, a pack. Just like mine does to you." Cyra felt her chest warm at that, though this time, it wasn't uncomfortable. It was nice. Remus was right, the moment she scented him, everything stopped. It wasn't the same as the drugging feeling she had with George, but more reassuring, like he was capable of protecting her.
"So, what we're going to do, I'm going to leave a sweater with you. You can carry it around with you in your bag, keep it with you and scent it whenever you need. That should help keep your wolf calm." Remus took off his sweater, leaving just his button up on, before giving it over to her. She took it carefully, folding it in her hands, "Thank you Papa."
"Anything for you, my little sunshine." Remus responded, smiling sweetly at her. She ducked her head in embarrassment, though she still listened to him as he continued his instructions, "Now, if you feel like everything is too much, like you may explode, just walk out. It's better for others to perceive you as rude than for you to lash out. Once you get through the full moon, you should feel much better. The wolf shouldn't come out until the next one approaches. Also, eat plenty of meat and chocolate, it'll help with the endorphins and mellow you out."
Once they were finished, Cyra felt much better, though she was really sad when she had to tell him goodbye. After thanking Professor Snape, she was excused to go to the great hall for lunch. He promised her that he would explain her absence in Charms, so she wouldn't get in any trouble.
As she entered the Hall, she made sure the sweater was stuffed out of sight before joining the Gryffindor table. As she took her place between the redheaded twins, she breathed in the scent of cherries and oranges, everything else seeming to slip away. She wondered if her wolf considered them to be part of her pack as well.
As Fred pulled her into a side hug, she stared at him in a dazed gaze, trying to pay attention as he spoke to her. "Did you get sick again? George and I were really worried when we heard you didn't show in Charms." He scratched at her scalp, trying to comfort her, but she wasn't sad at all. She was so comfortable. Smiling up at him, she wrapped her arms around his mid-section and gave him a soft squeeze, "I'm fine, thank you for worrying about me." The tips of his ears began to burn pink, but the rest of his expression didn't seem to change. As they pulled apart, George took her next, laughing, "Where's my hug then? I also worried about you!" Cyra stared at him in shock, before letting out a giggle and hugging him the same, "Here you go!" He grinned down at her, though his ears turned the same pink as his brother.
The other Weasley's and Tonks watched the trio curiously, knowing something was definitely different with Cyra. She didn't often so openly show as much affection with the twins. In private, maybe, but not so proudly where others could see. They brushed it off as just her being more comfortable being at Hogwarts before digging into their meal.
Cyra made sure to fill her plate with as much meat as she could, hoping she could please the wolf that it would leave her alone for the rest of the day. No one said a thing, though Tonks did tease her when she took eight chocolate eclairs, claiming she was hogging them all.
The rest of the week was bumpy, but she still managed. By keeping the sweater with her, she managed to avoid many blow-ups. Though she did almost snap at Percy when he tried to hold his being a year above her as superiority. He tried to insinuate she should keep a better hold of the twins, as if she were their handler. She could feel the burning tearing through her chest as she opened her mouth to scream back at him, but before a single syllable left, she was pulled back into the embraces of the twins, their own shouts drowned out as she was instantly catatonic from their scents.
It seemed to be only them who could do that, that instant drugging effect. She was confused why they could do that, but Moony's only kept her calm. She didn't give it much thought, however, as the Full Moon approached.
That morning, she could feel it, the wolf. Every breath she took, the smells of the world around her entered her nostrils. Everything was too bright, too loud. She managed to be excused from classes with complaint of a migraine, deciding to spend the day in the Infirmary with Madam Pomfrey. That evening, Professor Snape arrived with her wolfsbane, placing it on the tray of food that the Hogwart's house-elves had brought her.
With that, he wished her a goodnight, before briskly walking out without another word. Dunking back the potion, she swallowed it down with a wince, then shoving a piece of bread in her mouth to try and get the taste out.
Once it was time, Professor Sprout arrived, standing by the doors as she waited for her. Cyra packed up her things, thanking Madam Pomfrey before she followed her Head of House out. Professor Sprout tried her best to hold conversation, "You know, I grew the Whomping Willow for your father. His first time witnessing it, he almost got sent over the courtyard. You'd be surprised how many people underestimate it, though it is a very impressive tree." Cyra managed a weak smile, though didn't say a word as they continued their walk.
Once they reached said tree, she glanced up at the darkening sky with worry. It wouldn't be long before the moon appeared. After Professor Sprout disarmed the tree, she turned to Cyra with a pitying stare, "Well, my little sproutling. In you go."
Cyra bit her lip nervously before slipping inside, her heart beginning to pound loudly in her chest as she followed the tunnel. Once she reached the shack, she looked around the place, the feeling that she might vomit growing intense. She could definitely tell why people thought it was haunted. The peeling wallpaper held claw marks, the furniture all in disarray. This was where Moony was sent when he transformed, where he suffered without wolfsbane each month.
Placing her bag on the ground, she decided to take out a book to pass the time. Settling on the torn couch, she began to distract herself with the different forms of potion ingredients and substitutes. Time seemed to fly by, though each minute that passed set her more on edge.
Once the shack was taken over by darkness, she tossed the book over to where her bag was, not wanting to lose it. It didn't take long before the moon illuminated through the windows, the fear penetrating her heart before she only felt pain.
A scream split from her as she dropped onto her knees, tense as her bones set themselves on fire. It was then she realized she should have taken her uniform off. Panicking, she rolled onto her back, shakily trying to unbutton her shirt. Once she reached the middle button, her arms began to crack and break apart, Cyra seeing blinding white from the pain.
She couldn't breathe, her throat going raw from her screaming, tasting nothing but blood. Her back arched off the floor as it grew, her nails digging into the floorboards and leaving marks. Once it was over, she was a panting mess. Her body was in so much pain. She curled up her body with a whimper, her eyes squeezed shut as she trembled.
She was still there. She didn't black out. Opening her eyes, she wondered if it worked. Pushing herself up, she crawled over to the shattered mirror. In the distorted reflection was a brown wolf, the golden eyes glowing brightly in the darkness. Shuddering, she crawled back, another whimper leaving her. She was a monster. She didn't know what she preferred, not having control and never knowing what she looked like, or this.
Stumbling around the shack, she managed to crawl up on a dusty bed, curling up in a ball. As she closed her eyes, she wondered how Moony was doing by himself. She knew it was lonely by herself, but he had the wolf with him. And it wouldn't be kind.
When the morning came, Cyra was woken by the pain of her body shifting back, unable to move even after. She simply cried against the pillow, her body in so much pain. As footsteps entered, she attempted to pull the blankets over her, but could only manage the strength to get it over her legs.
"Oh you poor thing."
She knew that voice, letting out a shaking breath as she forced herself up to face them, "M-Morning Professor McGonagall." The older woman looked like she was about to cry, hurrying over to her, "My dear, let's get you dressed." She was a bit embarrassed as she had to be helped to get on her uniform.
Once they exited, Cyra squinted at the bright sunlight, clinging to Professor McGonagall to guide her. As they got in the halls, she looked around to see that no students were roaming the halls yet. It must be very early. Professor McGonagall spoke softly to her, "I'm taking you straight to Pomfrey. She should be able to fix you right up." She nodded, her legs beginning to regain strength as they walked. She was so sore.
"Will I be able to return to classes?" She asked. Professor McGonagall shot her a look, "Do you feel up to returning to classes?" At that, she looked away, thinking about her question. She didn't. But she missed Fred and George.
As soon as they were inside the Infirmary, she was whisked away by Madam Pomfrey, "Now what did you do to yourself! I swear if I see another scar, young lady, we will be having words!" Cyra let out a shaking laugh, allowing herself to be propped up onto the cot.
She said nothing as she was undressed, knowing Madam Pomfey was simply looking for injuries. "Oh! I knew it!" She exclaimed, "A scratch on your back! Not to mention all of the bruises!" How did that happen? Her mind went back to the night before, remembering how she dropped onto the floorboards. She supposed the wood must have scratched her. Still, she was rather lucky she didn't get cut from the broken glass.
"AND HOW DID GLASS GET INTO YOUR ANKLE!?"
She stood corrected. Glancing over at Professor McGonagall for help, she was disappointed to see her leaving, "She's in your hands, Poppy." Madam Pomfrey huffed, holding Cyra's leg up so she could see the small shard in her ankle, "And be sure to tell Dumbledore to get that place cleaned up! Honestly!" Professor McGonagall took no offense to her tone, chuckling as she exited, "I will, as well as notify the youngest Weasley boys to spend some time with our dear Cyra. Perhaps that will keep them out of trouble, at least for a day." Cyra felt her cheeks heat up when McGonagall sent her a wink before she was gone.
"Now, I don't want to have to stun you, young lady. So don't struggle!"
Cyra sighed, looking back at the matron, "I won't, I pro-" As she felt the glass being slid out, she began trying to squirm away, "Ow! No! No!"
"HONESTLY! IMMOBULUS!"