Facing Fears

Chapter 3:

Jaia sat on the bed drying her hair with a towel. While in the shower memories had come unbidden to her mind. With her recent exposure to Alec her emotions were running rampant. Ben hunted her from every corner, blink and breath.

They had been around fifteen when their relationship had changed. Jaia had gone into heat early, although that was just the excuse. Emotions had been building for years. Anyway she hadn't been prepared for this heat. Being prepared consisted of handcuffs and lots of sedatives. Ben had come home from school early, missing his last class. Jaia had skipped school telling him she wasn't feeling well. Ben had carried her faked note to school, shrugging it off as a "girl thing". .

She could still remember that day vividly. They had been living in New Mexico for two months at the time. Moving frequent had bother Jaia but to Ben it was like a game. They took turns choosing their next destination. The middle of what could be considered hell in Jaia's opinion was Ben's choice. It had been cold that day and when Ben walked in the back door to the house he had paused, sniffing the air curiously. He stripped off sweater and his t-shirt underneath rode up. Jaia had stared entranced with his abs. The moment their eyes had met, sparks flew. The decision to be together was taken out of their hands after that

Then at sixteen, Ben changed. Jaia could never pinpoint the exact day looking back. Tension slowly eased its way between the two. It's firm hands pushing her away from the person she was closest to. Zach's visits had begun to become later and less frequent. Jaia suspected it had to do with a girl. He had grown so distracted he hadn't noticed the bruises that Jaia had to work so hard to hid or explain away to her teachers.

The towel fell to her lap as tears began to fall. Throwing the towel to the floor Jaia crawled up between the covers, pulling them to her chin. She tried to ignore the abrasive bleach smell. The lack of human scent that was somehow unsettling. If she closed her eyes and imagined, she could almost smell Ben. Funny, the one person who she should hate most was the one who still reminded her of home.

She thought then of Alec. His scent was different that Ben's had been. While Ben had always smelled of sandalwood, and faintly of the ocean, Alec did not. His scent was more of a mint of some kind, leather lingered faintly. Jaia smiled remembering the jacket he had made a pillow of for her.

She wondered at that. He had reached across her and she hadn't woken up.

In his own room Alec lay on his bed flipping channels.

"News, boring, infomercial, boring, wrestling boring. Oh lady wrestling.. This could be interesting." He said finally putting the remote on his stomach. For all his bravado the day's events had worn him out. Minutes after Lady Shivira won the championship title, Alec was asleep.

He dreamed of the past, like he often did. This time however it was different. Alec dreamed of a girl with eyes like Jaia's. She was about nine. Marching in a different unit than his, she stuck out. Her eyes were soft, not hard with experience like most of the children at that facility. This girl's hair was a soft blond, like butter. Alec heard their TAC leader mention they would be transferring soon and he would be receiving a new unit. Alec dismissed it with a shrug and went back to eating.

His dream changed to that of a naughtier version of female wrestling and Alec smiled in his sleep.

Jaia saw Alec's face smile in her dream. Only it was his face and this smile was more sinister. He was straddling her while they were in bed. What had started out as casual love play had turned deadly.

"She doesn't talk to me anymore." Ben said casually.

"Who Ben?" Jaia asked warily. A year earlier, the mention of another woman would have made her furious but there was a look in Ben's eyes that said she was not going to like this answer.

"The Blue Lady." Ben said as he leaned to the side opening their bedside table drawer. Jaia started to struggle, knowing what he kept in that drawer.

"Ben, Ben please." She pleaded. But his motions did not hesitate and she knew that this would be one of the bad days.

His fury at the Blue Lady would be taken out on her.

Screaming woke Alec out of his pleasant dream and put him instantly into a nightmare of another. He passed through the bathroom, his gun in hand, barely registering the fact he had pulled it from beneath his pillow. He eased the door to Jaia's bedroom open slowly expecting to see intruders. What he saw was her thrashing on the bed in throes of nightmare.

"Please Ben. Please don't. It's not my fault. I love you Ben, don't do this please." She whimpered softly. Then she jerked, clutching at her stomach. Her breath came in pants.

He set his gun on the counter gently, setting the safety. Then he walked slowly to Jaia's bed. He shook her by the shoulder calling her name softly. Her eyes snapped open and all hell broke loose.

Jaia's eyes widened when they focused on Alec's face. Terror filled her eyes. The same face that had belonged to the man trying to kill her in her dreams was inches from hers. She swung her arm and punched Alec in the face as hard as she could. Catching him off guard he stumbled back and Jaia kicked out at his knee. Alec's knee gave and he fell back tripping over a bag she had left of the floor. Jaia pounced on top of him. Seizing her opportunity to take advantage of the fight in her dreams she rained blows on him. Her years of fury unleashed.

"I will not" she hit his nose and blood sprayed. "Ever let you" this time his lip busted "hurt me again!" this blow was to the stomach, knocking the air out of him.

"Jaia" Alec gasped. He didn't want to hurt her but he only had so much patience. He grabbed her hands and forced her to look at him. Jaia froze and came truly awake.

"Oh, my god." She whispered. She scrambled off his body, pulling her hands from him and backed into the corner furthest from him.

"I'm sorry." Her voice was tiny with shame. "I really am." She eyed him warily.

Sighing Alec laid back and tried to catch his breath. His face throbbed. Alec sat up and his sharp movement startled her making her flinch. Alec swore, scaring her further.

"I'm not going to hurt you Jaia." He said as calmly as he could manage. His eye was beginning to swell shut again and he could taste blood in his mouth. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

"If you thought I was too good looking couldn't you have just told me?" He joked feebly.

He retreated to the bathroom to survey his damage. He picked up his gun from the counter and tucked it under a towel. Being around Max this long made him conscious of having guns out. He figured her distaste was probably mutual. Jaia came to the door and handed him more ice in a bucket.

She picked up the towel to wrap the ice in and noticed the gun. Alec watched her work to control her emotions.

"You thought someone was in there with me didn't you?" She asked searching his face.

"Yeah. Good thing it turned out to be just you and your personal demons though." Alec replied trying for levity.

"You would have defended me?" She asked.

Alec frowned. "Of course."

Jaia didn't answer. She was thinking that maybe Alec and Ben weren't so alike after all.

When Alec had got most of the blood cleaned up he put down the washcloth and looked at her. "I know that you and 49- Ben had…problems. I know that looking at me is probably hard. If you want to talk about it, about him. I'll listen." He looked at her intently. Part of him wanted to hear the story, the other part of him said run like hell. He was a bit afraid deep down that he would find similarities in his own life.

"I don't think I am ready for that just yet." Jaia said avoiding his gaze.

"Okay, I'm going to try and get some sleep, you should too." Alec said heading for the door.

Jaia turned to do the same. "I'm sorry." She said without turning around. Sorry for hitting you, sorry for not wanting anything to do with you. Sorry you have his face.

"No problem, you hit like a girl anyway." Alec said over his shoulder.

Next chapter soon!