Disclaimer: I do not profit from this fiction and no copyright infringement is intended
Thanks to all those who have reviewed, it warms the cockles of my black little heart. Be warned though, there's some bad language in this chapter.
Chapter 4
Three Days Later
"Care to run that by me again, Carson?" Klaxons were sounding, lights going on and off everywhere and the normally placid city of the Ancients seemed like New York in rush hour. The Infirmary looked like a war zone, medical supplies, gurneys and blankets strewn everywhere. She hadn't seen it like this since the Genii siege.
"I asked to give him a mild sedative, and he just went… the phrase we use back home is absolutely nuts, Elizabeth." Carson was pushing buttons on his console and trying to get into his office, where Colonel Shepherd sat lodged underneath a table, muttering to himself and shooting his side arm at anyone who came anywhere near him.
"And he just began shooting at people!"
"Aye Elizabeth, he said something about knowing what we were up to and then boom! He nearly took Rodney's head off, and the man wasn't even paying any attention to him." Sure enough, Elizabeth could see Rodney sitting in a corner, fidgeting as a nurse tried to apply something to a nasty cut along his hair-line.
There was only one thing she could do. "I want to go in there."
"Aye, so do I, but Colonel Shepherd seems to have objections to that notion," Carson pushed the buttons harder, swearing as nothing worked. "He goes mental and develops computer skills, I ask ye!"
But Elizabeth wasn't listening. She snuck over to the glass door to Carson's office, through which she could clearly see John. She crouched down, determined not to get caught in the cross-fire, and called to him. "John, John, it's me, it's Elizabeth. Can you hear me?"
"I'm not listening to you!" he yelled, and sprayed fire in her general connection. "You're not Elizabeth! Elizabeth is in the real Atlantis, and she's safe and happy and there's nothing you can goddamn do about it you Wraith bitch!" Elizabeth sneaked a peek at him through the glass: he looked more panicked than she'd ever seen him. She'd thought he looked broken that day in the Gate Room when they'd dragged him from the puddle jumper, but she now realised that had been nothing more than flesh-wounds. This went far, far deeper.
"I'm right here John! And I want to help you. If I could just come in and sit with you, we could work this out." She heard a sudden crunch, and she realised that he'd run out of ammunition. "I know this must feel very frightening for you John, and I know that you feel like you're on your own right now, but you're not. You're home John, I promise by anything you can think of, you're home."
"Why do you keep doing this? Why do you keep pretending to be her? Do you just get some sick satisfaction out of playing her, out of making me think she's here?" The voice sounded defiant, angry, but underneath it, Elizabeth thought she could hear… desperation?
"Is that what they did to you on the Hive ship, John? Made you think you were in Atlantis?" Now that she thought about it, if they'd been manipulating his thoughts, they could've shown him anything. If they had wanted to get him to reveal something indirectly, they could've convinced him he'd gone mad, or killed someone. All the guilt he carried around with him, had they tried to use his conscience against him? He'd said they'd shown him a better life, an easier life, but had he simply been trying to lessen her worry? It was the type of dumb, infuriating thing he would do. "John, we have no ZPM, very little food, a recent insurgence from the Goa'uld, of all things, and I'm pretty sure I'm gonna lose my job once Caldwell makes his report. Does that sound like a perfect life to you?"
Silence. She peeked through the glass, but he said nothing.
"This is real life John, and it's horrible and messy, and really frightening. But it's true. I'm not trying to get anything from you, just please John, please let me in."
The door opened and she crawled through. Just as quickly it closed again, cutting off a string of choice Glasgow curses from Carson. He was still curled up underneath Carson's desk. He wouldn't look at her.
Common ground is the basis of any negotiation, Elizabeth. Her senior tutor in college had told her that, and she kept it in her mind as a touch stone whenever she went into a negotiation. Common ground was the key. Wordlessly, she crawled over to John, wincing as her knees landed on the remains of Carson's computer screen. He had the gun in his lap, and was staring blankly at it, as though he'd forgotten what it was for. Judging by the look on his face, Elizabeth thought it most likely he was going into shock. Gingerly she nudged the space beside him under the desk, trying to get in, but he didn't move. She crawled cross ways in front of him, and squirreled underneath the desk, curling herself up in the cramped space, her back against the right hand side legs of the table. John sat in profile before her, keeping a safe distance. He looked up at her suddenly, as if only now noticing she was there.
"What are you going to do now?" The voice sounded weary, hopeless.
"I stay here until you want to stay somewhere else."
Suddenly, viciously, he grabbed the gun, pointed it straight at her head. "How about I just blow a hole straight through you? Bullets don't do a lot of damage to Wraith."
She gulped, heart pounding. Maybe he wasn't really out of ammo at all, or maybe that was another gun. But she kept her voice calm. "But they do a lot of damage to people John. And you and I are people. That's why we're both under this desk."
He pulled the trigger suddenly, and she jumped. Nothing happened. "Go to hell."
Suppressing her shaking, she shrugged. "I've been there once or twice. It's what happens when you follow a road paved with good intentions."
He merely stared at her, silent. His lack of words scared her far more than screaming ever could have. She stared, tracing his profile in her mind's eye.
Words, the only thing between then, she thought, and now they were useless.
A/N There's not much of this left to go, hope it's ok. Please review, constructive criticism is always welcome
