Author's note: I just realize that I'm merging two different story ideas into one fic. Don't know how it, happened but it did. If you read on, you'll understand what I'm talking about. I also have to apologize to any NaruSaku fans reading my fic. I don't bash pairings and have nothing against this one in particular, but I am a big NaruHina and SasuSaku fan, and I'm starting to see hints at these revealing themselves. I swear I didn't intend for these things to happen. In fact, I thought I was going out of my way to avoid any pairings. Still, it's happening and there's nothing I can do short of reworking this entire chapter, and there's no way I'm doing that.
I'm too lazy!
So NaruSaku fans, if you have what it takes to continue reading, even after being warned, you've earned my respect and admiration.
Deals: Careful What You Agree To
"So," Sakura awkwardly began, "what do you think they're talking about?"
Sakura, Naruto, Shino, Hinata, and Kiba had been waiting nervously on the steps to the Hokage's building for nearly an hour. It was amazing how much had happened since the Akatsuki arrived that same morning. Naruto had been thrown into a competition for his life, Sakura had been made a drummer, auditions were held to get more members for the band, they found out Shino could play wicked bass, and Sasuke and Orochimaru were in Konoha having a very lengthy conversation with the Hokage.
"Who cares," Kiba said. He had something else on his mind. "Oi, Shino. When the hell did you learn to bass guitar?"
"…" responded Shino.
"Ano," Hinata began, "Shino said that he saw that guitar in a music store when he was five. The guitar was shaped like a beetle so he asked his father to buy it for him. He's spent every day since then learning how to play."
"If you knew that already, why did you act surprised when he said he was trying out?" Kiba asked.
"I was just surprised that he was actually going to join a group."
"So how come you didn't tell us before?"
Hinata glanced at Naruto before looking at the floor. "No one asked."
The door behind them finally opened. The group turned to see Shikamaru in his chuunin vest walking down the steps to them. "Tsunade-sama wanted me to inform you about what has been going on. Apparently, Sasuke found out Itachi would be entering this competition in order to win Naruto from Konoha. The rest is pretty typical Sasuke. He wants to beat his brother at something Itachi takes pride in and winning also means keeping him from getting what he wants. But before anyone gets their hopes up, Sasuke has made it clear he wants nothing to do with being a Leaf ninja again. This is purely for revenge."
Naruto just grunted and folded his arms. "Tch, even and idiot like me could figure that out. Why the hell is that snake bastard going along with this?"
Shikamaru scratched his head and looked away. "Here's her for-"
In the Hokage's Office…
"YOU'RE DOING THIS FOR THE WHAT!" Tsunade shouted in her drunken stupor. Her face was bright red, though no one in the room could figure out if it was because she was drunk, blushing, or just that pissed.
Orochimaru on the other hand simply smiled and held out his hands in a what-can-I-say pose. "For the endless supply of groupies Sasuke will have after he's reached star status. They will come in hordes and after having their way with him, I'll have an endless supply of the Uchiha bloodline!"
Tsunade still looked confused. "Why the hell do you still hang around this retard!" she demanded of the silent Uchiha.
Kakashi cleared his throat and gave his explanation. "Well, he did say that one of his 'ambitions,'" Kakashi made the quotations gesture to emphasize the word, "was to resurrect his clan. I just didn't expect him to do all in one night!" On the outside Kakashi seemed ashamed but inside he was screaming, I'm proud of you boy! Glad I'm not a complete failure as an instructor! Send some of them hunnies my way!
"Regardless," Tsunade turned her attention to Orochimaru, "I can't simply let one of your puppets waltz around my village as he pleases. And I'm disgusted that you dared step foot here."
"Hey!" shouted an irritated Sasuke, "Listen here you b-" Tsunade shot him a look that scared him shitless. Even Orochimaru, a man who had single handedly taken out a Kazekage and declared war on Konoha shuddered. Sasuke decided to reword what he said, "you very pretty lady. I'm no ones puppet." He pointed at his forehead which bore no protector indicating he belonged to a village. "And last time I checked, the Uchiha Estate is still the property of any living Uchiha, whether they serve Konoha or not."
Tsunade stared at him, trying to verify everything he just said. "Fine, but I'll be assigning an escort to you. As for you, Orochimaru, I want you out of this village. If you need to check in on you're boy toy, send word before you barge in. Otherwise, I end you vessel before you get a chance to use him."
"Likewise," Orochimaru said with the same smile on his face. "If you try to keep him from me when I return to take him back, I'll use the seal and kill him myself."
Back on the Steps…
"Naruto-kun, what are you doing?" Hinata asked shyly. After Shikamaru had dropped the bomb about Orochimaru's intention, Sakura had passed out and the guys were busy trying to revive her. Naruto, on the other hand, was busy with something else. For the past five minutes he had been carefully observing the village around him and then cracking open one of many fortune cookies he had purchased not so long ago from a little girl.
"Check this out Hinata-chan," he said almost as if he were in a trance. "These fortune cookies are magic. Every time I read one whatever it says comes true." Naruto opened one, which said, True beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Naruto pointed at a plastic bag floating near a wall. "That has got to be the most beautiful thing I've ever seen"
In Heaven…
"That's just some trash blowing in the wind!" God shouted. "Do you have any idea how complicated your circulatory system is!" The Almighty Father prepared to smite the mentally challenged blond when the Almighty Son held him back. (Yes, a Family Guy ref.)
"Just let it go dad! If he dies what else are we going to watch?"
Back to the Group, Shall We…
Shikamaru could not believe how much Naruto had lost it. Maybe Sasuke showing up today of all days was more than the guy could handle. Still, believing in such nonsense was beneath anyone who considered himself a respectable Shinobi. "Naruto, have some dignity and shut up about those troublesome cookies."
"If you think their so fake, prove it!" Naruto yelled angrily, tossing a cookie to Shikamaru. Shikamaru read the cookie out loud.
Never doubt the powers of a cookie! A world of pain awaits you!
Right after Shikamaru had finished, Ino and Temari walked up to the group and started yelling at the chuunin.
"Hey, lazy-ass! You owe me a date," the sand ninja stated.
"How dare you see other woman behind my back you two-timer!" said Ino. At this point, Shikamaru ran for his life. He was much faster than most would have expected for someone who stares at clouds all day. He was out of the group's sight when the girls finally caught up to him. The screams that came out of him scared Hinata so much that she clung to Naruto's jacket and refused to let go until it was over.
It was at this moment that Sakura decided to revive herself. Seeing Hinata scared out of her mind and Naruto so close, she assumed Naruto was doing something perverted. Sakura knocked Naruto away from Hinata and proceeded to stomp him into the ground. "How dare you come on to someone as innocent as Hinata! Have you no shame!"
Everyone was so busy watching Naruto getting beaten to death that no one noticed Orochimaru out of the building and towards the gate. In fact no one noticed Sasuke standing behind them until Naruto pointed a bloody hand at him from his hole in the ground. Sakura stopped beating Naruto and stared quietly at her ex-teammate, not sure how she should react.
"The Hokage wants to speak to us," he said without emotion. "She wants the dobe and everyone else to go home."
Sakura turned to the crater to help Naruto off the ground, but the hole was empty. All that was left was a fortune cookie he must have dropped in his haste to disappear.
In the Office…
When the two of them finally arrived in the Hokage's office, Tsunade was standing in the middle of the room. She told both of them to stand in from of her and before they could even suspect that she was up to something she quickly performed a series of hand seals. Sasuke was about to react when Tsunade rammed two fingers into his gut. She did the same to Sakura except for the how her hand was shaped into an 'O'. Sasuke felt woozy and then dropped to his knees. Sakura did pretty much the same.
"What the hell did you do to us?" Sasuke demanded from the woman standing over him.
"Like I said before, you aren't going anywhere by yourself. I just bound you to that escort." Tsunade leaned in to whisper in the boy's ear. "Think of it as an invisible leash, where you're the dog and she's the master. You won't be able to move more than three meters from her. However, wherever she goes, you go and it doesn't work the other way around. And if you're thinking you can simply kill her and be free, think again. She dies, you die."
"And how exactly are we suppose to go home? We live on opposite sides of the village" Sasuke argued.
'Then I guess she's staying with you at your place for the next month. I'll tell her family she's on a top priority mission. You could use this time to help her learn the drums. Genma is an excellent teacher, but a second tutor couldn't hurt."
"Are you out of your mind! She's not staying with me for a month and I sure as hell am not going to be led around like a dog!"
Sakura was struggling with emotions from Sasuke's statement. A part of her was hurt, another part wanted to rip his head off his shoulders, and the rest of her overjoyed. But there were some issues about this that bothered her greatly. "Tsunade-sama, if I have to live with him, don't you think three meters is a little…restricting?"
The hokage thought about that one. Her apprentice did have a point, but changing it would mean removing the jutsu then starting over and she was sure the boy would not just stand there and let her. "Just deal with it the best you can. It's only a month." Shizune and Kakashi walked into the room. "These two need to be taken to the hospital until the side effects of my jutsu wear off. When they're well enough, they'll check themselves out and head to the Uchiha's place."
Kakashi carried Sasuke while Shizune did the same for Sakura. They turned to leave, but not before Tsunade said one last thing to her apprentice.
"Have fun with your new pet Sakura. There's more to this jutsu then meets the eye," Tsunade said enthusiastically. Sakura saw her wink before she blacked out.
Some Open Field in Konoha…
This day had been a living hell for Naruto, and all he wanted to do now was sleep, even though it was only six o'clock. The blond boy stared blankly at the sky watching the clouds slowly glide by. Wow. This is really relaxing. Maybe Shikamaru is on to something. The soft grass beneath him and the cool breeze were a comfort he felt he well deserved for what he had endured. Precious sleep embraced him soon after he closed his eyes.
When Naruto opened his eyes, he found himself in a dark, damp room with a large gate in front of him. His head dropped in frustration when he realized where he was and who he was with.
Look whose here, the deep voice of the Kyubi boomed. What brings you to these parts? Did you come to offer yourself as a sacrifice?
Naruto sighed. "No you stupid fox. I just wanted to take a nap, but for some reason I ended up in this place. So point me to the exit and I'll be on my way." The giant eyes of the demon fox simply stared at him. "No? Then I'll find my own way out. Thanks for nothing." Naruto turned and waved mockingly at the prisoner.
Aren't you going to ask for my help you ungrateful brat?
"Unless you know how to play electric guitar I don't see any way you can help me," Naruto said, still trying to find his way out.
What makes you think I can't? That being said, Naruto sprinted back to the fox's cage. "Can you!"
Kid, my sound will have you begging to let me eat you? The fox said with pride. However, this only confused Naruto. "What's that supposed to mean! Can you play or not!"
I'm probably the best damn guitarist around. In my thousand years of life only one person has ever outplayed me and that bastard is dead.
"And why would you help me?"
The fox could only bang his head against the great gate in frustration. Kid, you probably taste stupid. If you lose, the Akatsuki get you. I may not give a rat's ass what they do to you, but I have a clear picture of what they plan to do with me. Still, there is one thing you need to do before I help. Prove you have the soul of a rocker. I'm not about to do a pansy any favors. Do this and you'll have all the groupie ass you can handle!
With that, Naruto found himself waking up…for real this time. He was surprised to find that it was well into the night. He was also surprised to see that the fox had left him a gift. In his lap was what appeared to be a normal electric guitar. Of course Naruto doubted that anything from the Kyubi could be considered normal. He wore the shoulder strap, which had his name embroidered into it, and held the guitar in the same way Shino had and took a moment to admire his new present. It was after all the best gift he had ever received. Hell, Naruto couldn't even remember the last time someone had given him anything of value.
Naruto felt powerful with the guitar in his hands. He couldn't explain the feeling, but it felt almost as if the guitar completed him. The image of the fire-red fox at the bottom corner, which was reminiscent of what Neji had seen during their fight in the Chuunin Exam, looked like it was trying to escape from its black background. It suited their relationship perfectly. Naruto especially like the way the fox had added a swirl of orange chakra that around the fox that seemed to feed the neck of the guitar.
Rest up, kid. You have another long day ahead of you tomorrow, the fox said in his mind.
For once, Naruto agreed fully with the demon that had caused him so much trouble in life. He thought about heading home but decided not to. His spot on the grass was good enough and the stars in the night sky were comforting. He cradled his instrument and drifted off to sleep. Only one thing still puzzled him about what the Kyubi had said. What the hell is a groupie?
The Uchiha Mansion, Middle of the Night…
Sasuke was dead tired, but many things were keeping him awake. The first was being under a roof he had not seen in a year and in a village he had betrayed for power. The second was the pink-haired girl sleeping in the same room three meters away on a separate mattress. How could she sleep so soundly in someone else's house? Did she do this often?
Sasuke was also sick and tired of being yanked towards her by the invisible leash every time she rolled over. Sure Sakura had warned him that she moved around a lot in her sleep, but he had insisted on staying as far away from her as possible and his pride would not allow him to move his bed closer to make the pulling stop. The Uchiha hoped this small revenge against Itachi would be worth all of this trouble.
Sasuke was just about to fall asleep when the girl in his room woke up. "I'm hungry," she said.
Without turning to look at her he grumbled, "Just wait for the morn—OOF" Sasuke had been pulled right off his bad and hit the floor hard. He was then dragged from his room, through the hallway, and into the kitchen. "What the hell's wrong with you! It's bad enough I'm stuck living with you for a month, but now you drag me from my bed just so you can stuff your face with my food? Have some sympathy!"
What Sasuke didn't know was that at night, Inner Sakura had greater control over Sakura's body and her patience had just run out. She lunged at Sasuke, picked him up by his shirt, and slammed him against a wall. "Have some sympathy! Listen up you jack-ass! Today has to be the worst day of my life! First I get forced into a band as the drummer and then I had to sit through three hours of the most god awful music I've ever heard! But worst of all, you returned to the village and get my hopes up that you just might have come to your senses.
"Instead, I learn that you're only doing this to get revenge and start a harem to breed you Uchiha clan back to life! As if that wasn't enough, you've treated me like crap since you got here and I'VE…HAD…ENOUGH!" She slammed Sasuke into the wall each time to emphasize those last three words.
She then dropped her voice to a sweet tone. "So do yourself a favor." Sakura took the fortune cookie she had found when Naruto disappeared.
"Have a cookie," she shoved the cookie into Sasuke's gaping mouth, "and SHUT THE HELL UP!!"
Sakura then released Sasuke and headed towards the fridge. Sasuke was left speechless. He had seen her act that way when Naruto had pissed her off, but she had never directed that rage to him before. He now had a great deal of respect for Naruto having survived so long.
"Damn that was sexy!" said a voice inside Sasuke's head.
"Who's that?" Sasuke asked the voice.
"I'm you libido!" the voice responded.
"My what?"
"You better half, you mojo, your giggity-giggity!"
"Huh?"
"Your sex-drive fool! I'm sick and tired of being neglected you bastard!"
"I haven't been neglecting you," Sasuke said. "I just have others things to take care of first."
"Dude, we're gonna be old and impotent by the time you kill Itachi."
"Kiss my ass you stupid voice! I'm only 14!"
"Fine, be that way! You may still have your early-teen innocence to shield you, but in a few years when you're at your sexual peak your ass is mine! Wait for me sweet pink haired girl! Your dreams will soon be a reality!"
"Whatever."
With that, the voice surrendered. Sasuke took a seat at the table across from Sakura, who had a banana and a glass of milk. Sasuke had to admit that the voice made a fair argument. Sakura did look cuter when she was angry. Plus, being shoved against the wall was pretty hot. Who would have thought Sasuke's main turn-on would be fearing for his life.
Unfortunately, such thoughts needed to take a back seat for revenge and nothing was going to change that. Well, staring at Sakura while she ate that banana might do the trick so Sasuke directed his attention to the fortune cookie she had forced into his mouth. He cracked the cookie and unfolded the paper hoping to find something that would console him..
It said: You are very negative in words, act, and feeling. Keep it up and you're never getting laid.