Another Chapter though I doubt you'll find it as funny as its predecessors. The next chapter will be more of a history lesson on Hinata's favorite band though I'll do my best to liven it up. I sincerely hope my story is as entertaining as the reviews I'm getting. I also hope God can take a joke or I'm in some deep spiritual shit. Oh yeah, since I figured out how to delete the stupid ones, I've re-enabled the anonymous reviews. Please, if you're going to be negative, at least give me something to work with. Else I'll have to sick Sasuke's libido on you.

Threads: At Least Look the Part

"WHAT!" The normally quiet Hyuga girl shouted, proceeding to jump up and down in excitement. Naruto had expected her to be surprised, but he certainly hadn't expected her to react in such a way. "OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD!"

"Shhh!" the sadistic jounin ordered. "We still need to give your father the cover story. If he sees you this excited, he'll know something's up. Everyone wait here while I deal with the un-pleasantries." With that, Anko left the genins to mingle in Hinata's room.

Naruto looked around the room and was surprised by how neat it was. Her bed was folded, scrolls and notebooks were neatly stacked shelves, and there was not a piece of clothing to be found anywhere on the floor. How can people live like this! Naruto thought.

Still, what surprised Naruto was that there were no CDs anywhere. He knew for a fact that Hinata had hundreds of albums of all sorts of music, from punk to metal and from classic to blues. So where did she put them. He spied a large trunk and asked Hinata if that was where she kept her collection. She nodded, still euphoric at the thought of attending her idols' farewell concert.

Naruto, forgetting to ask permission proceeded to open the chest. This snapped Hinata backed to reality and she slammed the chest closed. Unfortunately, Naruto's hands were still in the way.

"OOOOOWW!" he yelped in pain. His two teammates…well, one former and one current teammate fell over laughing. "What was that for Hinata-chan!"

"Gomen!" said the shy girl, bowing her head apologetically. "It's just that the chest is set up so that my father and cousin won't discover what I'm hiding."

Naruto scratched his head. "So its booby trapped?"

"Well, not exactly." Hinata began blushing furiously. "My CDs are surrounded by my undergarments."

The room fell silent. Shino's, Sasuke's, and Sakura's jaws dropped. Naruto had to turn away and pinch his nose so that he didn't bleed all over the place. Sakura wondered if she should smack someone if only to draw attention away from Hinata's embarrassing situation. Then it hit her.

"Hinata that's brilliant!" she shouted.

Everyone turned to the pink haired girl hoping an explanation was coming. "Are all of you Bakas or something? If Neji and Hyuga-sama suspected that Hinata were hiding something, the first thing they'd do is scan everything in her room with their Byakugan. But since they're both respectable men, unlike some people," she quickly clobbered Naruto over the head, "they wouldn't look any deeper than the surface."

Naruto still wasn't convinced. "Why not? The way you make it seem, it would be an obvious hiding place."

Sasuke interjected. "It's probably because they don't give her enough credit dobe."

Hinata cast her head down in shame, something she had become used to doing over the years. Naruto felt like it was his fault so he did his best to make up for it. "Cheer up Hinata-chan. You get to keep you music because they're stupid enough to underestimate you. You win they lose."

The girl smiled. "At least I know it works. One time, Neji-niisan had to do a random search in my room and when he looked in there, he went blind for two weeks."

This had everyone laughing their asses off including the rowdy jounin at the door seemed to enjoy the joke. "Who'd have thought that the pride of the Hyuga branch house was such an innocent?" She placed her hand on Hinata's head and grinned menacingly. "And who'd have guessed that the failure of an heiress was such a sneaky lil' devil? You've got potential kid. All right boys and girls, time to go!"

Everyone made their way to the door to leave, but Hinata stopped them. "Wait! They can't go…on the mission dressed like that. We have to blend in with the crowd and the way everyone is dressed would stand out to much."

"Hmm, that's a good point. Being the closet punk you are I'm sure you have something you can change into. Why don't you see if there's something Sakura can wear while you're at it?"

Sasuke spoke up. "Um, are we all forgetting that I'm still tied to Sakura. It's not as if we've had time to figure out this whole, 'extending the leash with her mind' thing yet."

"Well, she can always give it a try now," Anko replied. "Go ahead girl, give it a shot." Sakura nodded closed her eyes. "Here goes nothing."

She collected chakra at her center and imagined Sasuke farther and farther away from her. She wanted to extend the distance to at least seven meters but something seemed wrong. She opened her eyes to see a very annoyed Sasuke inches from her face breathing down on her. "What the hell Sakura," he said in a very not-in-the-mood kind of way.

"Cute! The farther you want to get the closer you are," Anko said with a very uncharacteristically girly smile on her face. It quickly left in favor of a sickly expression. "How disgustingly poetic. Guess you have no choice but to stay in the room why'll they change lover boy. I would have suggested you wait on the other side of the door, but I doubt that there's room enough for that now."

"Why didn't you say that to begin with then!"

"Relax kid. You can't be that mad about it. You're a young stud and they're hot sexy chicks. You should be in fucking heaven right now!"

Listen to the lady! I like the way she thinks! came an all too familiar voice in Sasuke's head.

Not you again. Don't I have enough problems as it is?

Hardly. I told you I'd be back and boy am I glad!

I'm not listening, I'm not listening. La-la-la-la-la, Sasuke repeated as he watched Anko, a jealous Naruto, and a quiet Shino leave the room. He looked down at Sakura who seemed unsure what to feel. Should she be angry at herself for putting them in this situation, which she would of course take out on Sasuke anyways, or should she use this to her advantage and get under Sasuke's skin a little. She chose the latter. After all, Sasuke had been her long-time tormentor in love when they were teammates. It was only fair that she return the favor.

She demanded he turn around, close his eyes, and threatened to kill him if he so much as turned his head in their direction. Her usual spiel when her nude body was involved. Sasuke did so without fail and she and Hinata proceeded to talk clothes. Sasuke wanted to die. Sure he had made this request several times over the past week, but he swore that this time he meant it.

Dude, take a peak. I guarantee it'll be worth your untimely demise, said Sasuke's libido.

Sasuke ignored the voice but he couldn't ignore what was happening behind him. He felt movement behind him, heard the sound of a zipper being unzipped and the sound of something hitting the ground…hard. Much louder than a dress falling on the floor should sound. Sasuke took a big gulp. Oh but Sakura wasn't through with him yet. Sakura then felt something soft, yet firm rub against his ass.

Oh I've died and gone to heaven! Do you have any idea what she's doing!

She's probably putting on pants or stockings…

Hey, for someone who calls me a sexual deviant, you're pretty 'imaginative' yourself.

Then Sakura did something that sent a jolt to a very unused part of Sasuke's anatomy. Struggling with a certain article of clothing, Sakura turned around. "Hinata," she said. "Could you tie this for me?"

Guess I'm not the only one enjoying this. Better get the little guy under control before she notices.

You're such a bastard, you know that?

Do you realize you're insulting yourself here?

Sasuke could only pray that this personal hell/heaven would end soon and thankfully it did. Sakura told him it was safe for him to open his eyes and he was staring straight into a mirror, a fully clothed (well, sort of) Sakura by his side. She was wearing baggy pants (Libido: geez, what a letdown. Buy a skirt for Christ's sake!) the ends tucked into very 'Sakura' type boots. These boots gave off a sexy but deadly vibe Sasuke felt matched the pink-haired girl perfectly.

He took a look at her shirt and realized why she would have had trouble 'tying' it. It was nothing more than a rolled up bandana tied behind her, barely covering anything at all (Sasuke: Why! Why would you do this to me!). Sakura was no Tsunade, but she had definitely grown in that particular area. Sasuke couldn't believe Sakura would actually go out in public like that. Then he noticed that she was holding a vest in her hand and concluded that she was just putting on a show for his benefit. Sakura screamed tease. "So," she said to him facing the mirror and striking a pose. "What do you think?"

Tease! Ask her to take it off, Sasuke's inner demon requested.

"For the love of God, would you stop being a pain in the ass!" He accidentally spoke out loud staring right at Sakura. He realized what he had just done with enough time to see the vain pop in Sakura's forehead.

"Oh shit…"

Outside Hinata's Room…

All sorts of violent noises could be heard from inside the room. Anko did her best to take in every scream and smack, enjoying it way more than she should have. Naruto and Shino simply waited for it to end.

"Sorry Naruto. It seems like Sasuke managed to beat you in yet another area. He has to be the biggest idiot born in Leaf Village," Anko said from her position by the door.

Naruto merely shrugged off the veiled insult. "That's saying something considering how we have Gai and Lee. Still, is Sasuke suicidal or something? Even I know better than to say something like that."

"Maybe he likes being beaten to death by angry women," Shino offered. The three stared at each other for a while and then shared a good laugh. Then the door swung open and they went back to pretending as if nothing happened. Sakura walked furiously out of the room, dragging a limp Sasuke three meters behind. At least she was able to fix that little nuisance. She was wearing a vest over her makeshift top though it still revealed some cleavage. The back of the vest read 'I'm surrounded by Bakas.'

When Naruto looked back at the doorway, he was shocked to see…skin on the usually fully clothed Hinata. She wore a black skirt that was short…very short. Surely Hinata would never consider wearing a skirt so damn short, but here she was. Naruto had to fight to keep his hormones from getting the better of him and he concentrated on either the spiked wrist strap, the boots similar to the ones Sakura wore, or the thin choker around her neck. But his eyes began to wander and became fixated on her chest.

When the hell did she grow those! To hell with that, where the hell has she been hiding them!

In truth, Hinata and Sakura had pretty much the same bust size. However, because Hinata was smaller in height and thickness, it gave off the illusion that her breasts were bigger. The fact that she was wearing a t-shirt that showed off her stomach and thin arms did not help matters for Naruto. Except for the way she constantly fidgeted nervously, the girl in front of did not remind him of Hinata at all.

Anko couldn't stay silent any longer. "My, you girls look like total sluts." She wiped her eyes as if she were crying. "I'm so proud of both of you!"

"So Naruto," Sakura said, beginning to cheer up. "What do you think of Hinata's new look?"

If it weren't for these bars, I would so tap that…Boy, the voice of Kyubi said to Naruto, I demand you tap that groupie in my place!

"Shut the hell up you stupid demon!" The hall went completely silent as everyone looked at the boy who had just reclaimed his title of the dumbest person ever to be born a Leaf. As he watched Sakura lunge at him, Naruto understood what had driven Sasuke to do something so obviously stupid.

"Oh shit…"

Fifteen Minutes Later…

Well, let's just say that Naruto had never in his life experienced such pain in so short a time. Fortunately, Kyubi was the man when it came to quick recoveries. He was after all able to regenerate a friggin' hole in Naruto's chest, remember? Of course, this required a bit more energy for the Kyubi to patch up. Hell, watching a new arm spring out of a bloody stump was enough to make even Anko a little queasy.

When the disgusting regeneration was complete, Naruto explained to Sakura that he and Sasuke were having trouble with some voices in their heads, and that if anyone should understand it would be her. In this way, Naruto guilted Sakura into healing Sasuke and the six of them left the Hyuga mansion. They decided to stop by a thrift store in order to find some suitable clothes for the guys.

Naruto, unwilling to wear anything that wasn't orange, decided on a pair of long-length orange shorts and a black t-shirt that read 'Find someone who cares!' Around his neck and in the open was the necklace he had won from Tsunade Originally, it was an orange jumpsuit that he picked out, but after much pleading Hinata was able to convince Naruto against it. Apparently another band was known for such outfits and fans hated it people wore those jumpsuits without knowing the first thing about the group or their music.

Sasuke's new attire looked pretty much like his old one. He chose a collared black shirt which he left open in the front, revealing an Uchiha t-shirt. On the back of the collared shirt in very sinister grey lettering was a single word: Avenger. This had Naruto and Sakura groining (Inner Sakura: Oh get over it already Shithead!). In fact, the only thing really new about his look was that he removed his arm warmers, revealing the snake summoning tattoo on his left forearm, and a blue and black bandana where his forehead protector should have been. This was more to hide the growing bump where Sakura had head butted him.

When they were through shopping, they left the store and waited on a bench across the street. The only person not ready was Shino, who had been taken by Anko. She said that she had something special planned for the Aburame. This had his teammate concerned. "Don't worry Hinata," Naruto had said, "I'm sure that Anko will bring him back in one piece."

"Ladies and Gentleman," came a cry from on top of the shop. "I present to you, the one, the only, improved Aburame Shino!" She lifted a large sack that seemed to be filled with something heavy and chucked it off the building. The four genin, sitting on the bench, were stunned and appalled. The jounin did not just put their bassist in a bag and then thrown him off a building, had she? They got up and proceed to open the bag. Naruto was the first to react.

"What the hell happened to your head!" Naruto and the others quickly untied him as Sakura healed his injuries. Shino demanded that someone give him a mirror. He was wearing an open dark green sleeveless coat without an undershirt. The collar was high, but because of the split, it showed more of his face than he would have liked. Then he eyed his hair and what he saw could only be summed up in one heated statement:

"Goddamn it!"

Heaven…

"God, we have a code 3! Someone just used your name in vain!"

The Almighty looked down on the herald and sighed. "You're new here aren't you?"

"Yes, but I hardly see what that has to do with anything."

"You moron! We haven't taken that commandment seriously since…ever! Now get lost before I have Satan hire your sorry ass!" The Herald disappeared in a flash leaving God alone looking down on the boy with glasses. "That's funny right there, I don't care who you are."

Back in Konoha…

"What the hell have you done to my fro you witch!"

Anko smirked and said, "Oh come on! Dreads beat froes any day of the week. The ladies will be all over you."

The pissed Shino was not buying it. He may have liked his new dark green sleeveless coat with a high collar, but froes were what defined the males of the Aburame clan. Altering it in any way was the equivalent of cutting off your own balls and putting on a dress. Not that Aburame women were weak or people to be taken lightly (Hell, they could kick my ass).

"Don't worry Shino," Hinata said. "It doesn't look bad."

"Yeah," Sasuke added. "It looks kinda cool."

Naruto and Sakura nodded their agreement.

Only when he realized that he had the support of all his friends did he let it go. "Glad that's settled. I was actually surprised how ripped you are for a fourteen year old. If it wasn't for your age I would have jumped you while I had you all tied up." She winked teasingly at the boy and Shino could not stop the blood from rushing to his face. Anko stuck her tongue at the boy. "Too bad for you. Anyways, we have four hours until the concert starts so let's get going!"