Fallen Shinobi: Behind the Music

"Oi Hinata," Naruto spoke as his group jumped from tree to tree. "I remember listening to Fallen Shinobi when I borrowed your CD, and I thought their music was pretty cool. I figured since you're such a huge fan you should know practically everything about them."

You bet your ass I do! is what she wanted to say, but instead she just blushed and stammered a simple "I know a little."

There was a long silence after that and Sakura could only rub her temples in frustration. "What Naruto meant to say was 'please Hinata, tell us about them.' Actually, I wouldn't mind hearing a little bit about them myself. Aren't they from Konoha?"

They continued towards the village where the concert was to be held, but Hinata clearly had everyone's attention. She became tense, afraid that she might embarrass herself or come off as a 'little' fanatic. Wait, what the hell was she thinking! She prided herself on knowing what she did about her idols! Finding the confidence to speak, she began.

"Well, we all know that before the kyubi attacked, our village was at war with pretty much everybody. It was a depressing time for the villagers so they tried finding things to liven their spirits. Some tried sewing, others chose yoga, and some even tried stand up comedy, though that ended up being more depressing than the wars. One person, however, chose music and that person is the Fourth Hokage, but I can't for the life of me find his name anywhere in the history books."

The teenagers glanced at Anko in the hopes that she could shed some light on this mystery, but she shot back at them with a what-the-hell-are-you-looking-at-me-for look. "I doubt even Kakashi knows what the hell that guy's name is. Just do what the rest of us do and call him Yondy."

Hinata continued. "Fine. Well, at the age of about eight, Yondy," she shuddered at how she had just used such a stupid name to represent one of the greatest men in the shinobi, and music, world, "was browsing through a music store looking for something to do when he saw a jounin trying to get a refund for a guitar. The man told the clerk that the instrument was broken, but the clerk refused to believe that he had sold a faulty product. So while they were arguing, Yondy picked up the guitar, plugged it into an amp, and played as if he had been playing for years. The jounin was so embarrassed that he ran out of the store crying, leaving the guitar behind."

"But what does the Fourth Hokage have to do with the Fallen Shinobi," if I have to tell you who was stupid enough to ask this question, you deserve to be kicked in where it hurts.

Sakura and Sasuke snapped, but being that their teammate was such a moron at times, they had every right. Sakura grabbed Sasuke's arm and swung him around, finally releasing him in Naruto's direction. The Uchiha landed a clean kick to the back of the blond boy's head, driving him straight into the tree in front of him.

"If you're too stupid to figure it out, then shut the hell up and wait for her to get to that part!" his teammates shouted in unison. Anko secretly gave both of them the thumbs up, showing her approval.

Hinata watched in Horror as she watched her crush get crushed into the foliage, but when she saw that he was alright she went on with the story. "So about ten years pass and Yondy is getting really good. In fact, some say that by this time he could be considered a god of guitarists and his skill only seemed to get better with each passing day. He also started finding equally talented prodigies emerging from the village.

"The first was the band's drummer, Sye. Yondy met him when he was only twelve and they were sent on a mission together. The mission went sour and they were forced to fight off enemy shinobi. Sye specialized in fist fighting, but Yondy noticed that he beat his opponents almost rhythmically. They escaped with their lives and when the group was safe and sound in the village, Yondy asked if he wanted to start a band with him. He did, he joined, and he played. That's how the Burning Leaves started."

"Burning Leaves?"

"BAKA!" Naruto found himself in pain once again.

"Their bassist was also a member of the Aburame clan, but because he was allergic to insects, he was kicked out of the clan. Still, he was a genius when it came to playing those four strings and he was quickly picked up by Yondy and Sye. His name is—"

Shino cut her off shouting, "That name is forbidden! Don't say it! Please, shame will befall me if I so much as hear his name!" He covered his ears, but Anko knocked some sense into him…literally.

"Stop your damn whining bug boy! I find the irony of this one quite entertaining," she said with a grin. "Go ahead Hinata. Finish what you were saying."

"Well," Hinata began, unsure where the jounin was going with this, "his name was Raid." (AN: Raid® - Kills bugs dead)

Shino fell to his knees on a branch and wept.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

"Moving on," Hinata said, a little irritated at the pathetic scene her teammate was making. Something just doesn't feel right about this one. "The next band member was a boy named Maiku, who wanted to learn to play guitar. However, he didn't want just any teacher. He wanted to be taught by the best so he went to Yondy. At first, he was skeptical about taking in an apprentice, but after seeing the boy's raw talent and learning that the boy was a quick study, Yondy took Maiku under his wing.

"Last but not least is the voice and soul of the band, Serius. An interesting thing about him is that he came to Konoha as a refugee from a village that had been annihilated. Watching his family killed right before his eyes was so traumatizing that he became mute. However, one day while sitting at a ramen stand," she glanced at Naruto hoping for his sake that he didn't say anything, "he heard someone playing the guitar outside and started humming. Keep in mind that in all the years he lived in Konoha, Serius never made a sound. Still, Yondy heard the feeling behind the soft hum and asked him to join the band.

"Unfortunately, Serius declined but silently agreed to watch one of their practices. During practice Yondy and the band played a song that Yondy had been working on for years, but since the band lacked a vocalist, he was forced to take the role. Yondy may have been a brilliant guitarist, but his band mates have declared that they would rather listen to kunai scrapping chalkboards. Serius fell in love with the melody of the song and found the lyrics moving, but he felt the vocals were a bastardization of the song. So he joined the band and eventually Yondy brought out the full potential of Serius' voice."

Sasuke, who had never cared for music he didn't already like, was intrigued that the vocalist had a similar haunted past. Leave it to the Narcissist to enjoy something that can be related to himself. Sakura noticed and scoffed. "Just f-ing marry yourself already!"

Anger was starting to rise in Hinata at the constant interruptions. The feeling was unfamiliar to her, but she found herself liking it. "So the band played and their popularity grew. Some villagers had labeled Yondy a pedophile. Why else would he choose such young kids to join his band? When someone came to Yondy with this accusation, he would laugh it off and simply reply that there wasn't an adult in the village who could play as well as these kids. And the truth was that Yondy loved the ladies and the ladies loved Yondy. Unfortunately, this ultimately lead to the band's breakup.

"Five years after the Burning Leaves was formed, the band was at its peak. When these guys weren't on missions, they were playing a show. Even after Yondy's promotion to Fourth Hokage, the band stayed strong. However, during a performance Yondy caught sight of the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. He had to have her and have her he did. A week later, Yondy broke the news to his comrades that he had to leave the band. Saying the four band members were pissed would be an understatement, but nothing they said could change the Fourth's mind.

"The popular theory is that the groupie was a manipulating groupie who convinced Yondy to go solo and make it big outside the village. However, others believe that she was actually just an innocent woman who accidentally got knocked up during a one night stand and wanted Yondy to be a man and deal with the consequences. Her fairy tale doesn't end on a happy note though, because nine months later, the kyubi attacked. We all know what happened to the Fourth, but no one knows what happened to the woman."

Naruto hesitated before speaking. "Hinata, when I borrowed their album, I heard two guitarists. The Fourth can't be playing from beyond the grave, so who did they pick to replace him?" His teammates were about to pound him into the ground when they realized that he brought up a good point.

"No one really knows," Hinata said. "He wears a hooded cloak on stage and few people have ever seen him anywhere else. The only thing anyone knows about him is that he has some relationship to the Fourth."

"Wow," Naruto stated. "When we get back to Konoha I want to listen to what the Fourth's guitar style sounds like. I bet it kicks ass!"

This time it was Anko who spoke. "Good luck with that. When the fourth died, every single recording with him in it was mysteriously lost or damaged." She waved her hands and fingers in a spooky manner. "Even people who heard him play live can't seem to remember exactly what he sounded like. It's as if some invisible force wants to erase his legacy off the face of the planet."

"Well that sucks," Naruto muttered. "I guess that only leaves me with one question." Sakura had a bad feeling about what might come out of the boy's mouth, but she resisted the urge to hurt him until he earned it.

"What's a groupie?"

And there you have it. What surprised Shino and Sasuke, who was being forced around violently by his ex-teammate, was that all the women of their party had reacted to Naruto's stupid, and I cannot emphasize that word enough, question. Sakura landed a clean left hook to the jaw that would have vaporized half of a normal human face. Anko, from behind the boy, made contact with a swift kick to the family jewels. Even Hinata got in on the action, her feminine dignity taking control. She struck with a clean jyuken palm strike to the stomach. This shocked the hell out of everyone, but not as much as it did Naruto.

"Et tu, Hinata?" he stammered before the world went black.

Thirty Minutes Later…

Naruto opened his eyes slowly, finding himself sprawled out on the ground in a very busy area. While he was blacked out, one of them must have carried him the rest of the way to the concert village. Naruto assumed that Sakura made Sasuke do it, but he was still in too much pain to start anything. He noticed that the place he was at smelled like alcohol, sweat, and sex, though he wasn't quite sure how he knew what sex smelled like. In fact, it kind of bothered him that he did.

He focused on other things around him. He saw a lot of people dressed similarly to the way they were. If Hinata hadn't made them change, they would have stood out like Jiraiya in a Woman's bathhouse. Naruto watched them all from his spot on the ground. A lot of the guys were huddled together just pushing the crap out of each other. He was definitely going to give that a try when he regained the strength to stand.

The girls on the other hand were just standing around. Naruto was confused by them. The way they were dressed suggested, at least to him, that they wanted people to look at them, however, when they caught someone staring they'd lash out as if they were offended. They're making my head hurt, but at least Sakura won't have a problem fitting in.

Hey, stupid brat! The Kyubi called to Naruto.

Leave me alone you stupid fox. I don't have the energy right now to deal with you.

I can see that you moron. What the hell is wrong with you! No one asks women like those three what a groupie is! Anyone with half a brain should know that!

Well, excuse me. You could have helped me avoid all this if you had just told me the first time I asked instead of just laughing your ass off for hours on end!

How the hell was I suppose to know you were serious? The Kyubi snickered a little bit at the memory. Anyways, since you still don't have a clue I'll fill you in. Those hot girls you were looking at, the teases with the skimpy outfits are what you would call groupies. They're here to get the attention of the musicians if you know what I mean. Eh? Eh?

No I don't get what you mean and I'm trying really hard not to. Still, why the hell would Hinata and the others gang up on me for asking a question?

Because everyone loves a groupie, The Kyubi said with a sly smile. But in your case, I would say it has to do with three things. Number 1: You're an idiot. Number 2: You asked a question that's offensive to modest women. Number 3: Out of all the people you could have possibly asked, you ask the most innocent person you could possibly meet. What the hell is wrong with you!

Their conversation was cut short when Sasuke demanded that Naruto get off the ground, adding that he was tired of carrying his sorry ass. Naruto complied with his request, glad that he had the ability. He turned to the girls to apologize, but before he could say a word, he was cut off.

"I'm so sorry Naruto- kun," Hinata said. "I don't know what came over me."

Anko was next. "Yeah we thought you were trying to be fresh with us, but really, you were just being your stupid old self."

"But if you ever mention that word around us again," spoke Sakura, seething with undying rage, "we'll make you beg for death!"

This had every male close enough to hear shaking with fear. Sasuke found himself unconsciously scooting as far away from Sakura as the bond would allow. Shino wanted to crawl into a corner and cry, which was very unlike him. Some of the weaker males soiled themselves! Inner Sakura saw all of this and relished the victory she won for her gender. Feminism for life!

"Eh, heh, heh, heh," Naruto laughed nervously. "I'll try to remember that. Well, let's go find the stage before we scare anyone into an early grave. Tsunade-bachan, said that once we got into the village, we'd have to look for the concert grounds passed a large wall. Luckily for us, Fallen Shinobi chose this place because they don't charge an entry fee so we should be all set."

"Yup, you sure are!" Anko stated enthusiastically. "I should get started on my own mission, but I should be back by the time the concert ends. Tsunade-sama said that we should stay overnight and she gave us plenty of dough to cover us, but I'll hold on to that. Bye then!" The smile on her face before she left made every one of them nervous.

"Please tell me she doesn't plan on blowing it all on sake and dango." Sakura said aloud. Well, I guess it doesn't hurt to hope.

The five of them made their way to the concert arena, which was actually nothing more than a large empty lot that had been separated from the rest of the village by a large flimsy wall. Shino, Sasuke, and Naruto noticed that the girls were getting a lot of creepy looks from several of the guys around them. They swallowed hard hoping none of them were stupid or drunk enough to do something stupid. Unfortunately, one of them was.

"Hey babes," a brazen young man said. "What say you ditch the dweebs and see what it's like to be with a real man?" As if he had not gone far enough, the idiot reached out towards Hinata's chest for a feel, but just as he was about to claim his prize, a very angry hand grabbed his arm and forced him facedown into the dirt. People tried to catch a peek but dust was covering all the action. Only Hinata, who had activated her byakugan, could see anything.

No one was more confused than Sakura. She had been milliseconds away from doing the same thing to the poor bastard, but her teammates and Shino had beaten her to it. She figured they were just trying to get on her good side, and truth be told they had earned quite a few brownie points. She was just glad that she was close enough for Sasuke to get into the action.

"Are you high!" Sasuke shouted from the cloud of dust. "She finally calmed down and you want to piss her off again? I should do you the favor and just end you before she has a chance to get her hands on you!"

Naruto was heard next. "Screw that! What the hell is wrong with you! You aren't good enough to lick the bottom of her shoes, let alone cop a feel of those babies!" The last comment had Hinata feeling mixed emotions. A part of her was speechless that Naruto thought so highly of her…um…features, but at the same time, the way he phrased it made her want to strangle him. However, seeing him kick her would-be-assaulter where it hurt made up entirely for it.

"Who the hell are you calling a dweeb! Is it the goddamn dreads! I didn't f-ing ask for them!" Hinata watched as her teammate stomped violently on the man's chest. "Stop laughing at me!"

The boys finally stopped, but they weren't quite finished yet. Shino and Sasuke each grabbed an arm, holding up the bloody carcass of a man, and Naruto prepared a rasengan. "It's been hell knowing you, but let's do this again some time," he said with a grin. He threw his attack into the man's chest and thrusted upwards, sending him flying until he was nothing more than a speck in the darkened sky. Woman everywhere applauded.

"Can we please just get to the damn show!" Sasuke pleaded desperately. So they made their way to the entrance and were surprised to find that there was no line to get in. In fact, everyone was just huddled together a great distance away looking pissed as hell. They soon found out why when they met the bouncer at the entrance.

"Welcome to Concert Village's open air theatre. That'll be two hundred bucks."

"WHAT!"

"Each."

Ministory: Author's Dilemna

God: What the hell? The story is this freakin' long and I don't get to make an appearance! Nobody puts Yahweh in the corner! Michael! Get your angel ass in here!

Michael: Yes lord?

God: Have that Xenex guy sent to the deepest realms of hell and have Satan come up with the worst possible punishment he can think of for him.

Satan: Way ahead of you! You're not the only one pissed about not getting a spot in this chapter. Believe me, this is this sickest form of punishment I've ever come up with.

Xenex: Make it stop! For the love of everything Holy, make it stop!

God: What did you give him?

Satan: Heh, heh. I'm having him re-watch all the stuff he's ever regretted watching. Right now he's on the clips of the dubbed Naruto episodes.

Dubbed Naruto: Believe it…Believe it…Believe it…

Xenex: Satan, you sick bastard!

God: My self, that's brilliant!

Satan: Oh, we're just getting started. We still have the last episode of Pilot Candidate for Goddess, the Paris Hilton Sex Tape (you know, the one where she just lays there), and all seventy-something episodes of Hikaru no Go.

Xenex: NOOOOOOOOO! That anime has no point! Stop with the madness, I'll do anything! I promise I'll give you better roles in the next chapter!

God: Like hell you will! No one's going to keep reading after this crap chapter!

Satan: Tell you what kid. If you get enough reviews, we'll let you go. But so help me, if no one comments, we're watching that sky-diving video of yours!

Xenex: Please readers! If you have any compassion at all, make a review! (Side-note: apologies to anyone who actually likes HnG or the last episode of Pilot Candidate for Goddess).