Author's Notes: Hi everyone! here for another important update: Given the tone and language that i'll be using starting in this chapter and the rest of the story from here on, i've decided to make it M rated at last, I hope that some of you can eventually forgive me for this decision, but i was honestly feeling a little restricted with what i could write with the T rating, and as you could read before, starting from ch. 27, i've made the characters more grown up to match that tone.
As always, thank you to all of my followers and i hope you all still have an easy time finding the story.
Disclaimer: I don't own The Loud House, the brand, as well as all of its characters and settings belong to Chris Savino and Nickelodeon, all rights reserved.
Chapter 30: Denial and Delusion.
Lucy's P.O.V:
"The princess and the space cowboy
A tale of delusion, a path of denial
A test in their hands, to avoid the tomboy
Obstacles they have, but their love is perennial
They fight back, through bloody nails
Seven Sins, to conquer is a feat.
But one remains, perhaps the worst
A bond of blood, they can't defeat."
- …mmm This one won't do. - I thought to myself while reading my latest attempt at creating the structure for a new poem, a poem with a deep meaning behind, one that I wouldn't reveal to my group, or to my friends, or even to my family, a "personal" project of mine.
At least not at the moment, not when one of the 2 characters hasn't even realized his path ahead, a dangerous, dark path that will most likely take every ounce of his willpower to face.
I shouldn't support this, I know this goes outside of my typical interpretations of forbidden love, this isn't like the dream of a 9-year old girl with her vampire head statue, waiting for it to come back to life any second and take her to the afterlife.
This is about two people that are about to face a perilous future, two people that will probably lose everything in the process, including the love and support of their closest relatives, most importantly.
This is not about fantasy and dreams, this is about real life and its consequences.
I hate lying to my family members, I can't believe what I've reduced myself to do, but if there was one thing that I realized by watching her behavior after refusing to assist her…
Lana Loud cannot know about it, by any means.
I want to help them, but they cannot know that, I understand my position, I know more than I should, but seeing two desperate souls in the need for help, specially when nobody else could support them, makes me feel responsible.
And on top of that, I kind of understand how Lola feels…
Because I also know that feeling, no, not the feeling of the dramatic angst of a typical romance novel about forbidden love with vampires.
I know what it feels like, to fall in love with my brother.
I don't feel jealousy, I don't feel pain, I don't hold anything against Lola for actually acting on her feelings, I understand my position, the time has passed, Lincoln is now closer to her than he even realizes, that window of opportunity has closed, and so have those buried feelings that I had.
And I'm relieved that they are gone, I may be into the dark and the occult, I may be a fanatic of the forbidden and the immoral, but I wouldn't wish that curse upon anyone.
The curse that has now been passed to Lola Loud, of all my sisters.
- …Sigh - I exteriorize my angst, the next complication disturbing my sacred rest in the corner of my dark room.
How do I help them? subtlety is gone, it is a know fact in the house that Lincoln and Lola talk to each other too much, at first, it was just me, hiding in the vent while I observed their interaction while writing that story, then it was more than that, Lola began frequenting Lincoln's room for fashion advice, to make him assist her with putting on dresses and helping her stretch, soon, Lincoln was calling her to his room to just talk to her about life, his problems in school, his feelings for Stella, the list goes on.
She listened, she gave him advice, whatever piece of infantile trivia she could come up with, but Lincoln still took it by heart. Then began the "Lessons", she was doing "mock up" dates, teaching him how to dance, how to flirt, how to "hold hands and hug appropriately", I could go on, the story was still being updated from time to time, but it was becoming clear that it was no longer the priority for their "reunions"
… And then, things became common knowledge last year, Lola's "Generous gift", from a "Promo that she got for winning the little miss Prim and Perfect contest", had been impressive, quite in fact.
Too impressive, suddenly, the best TV on the house was not in the common Loud couch, suffice to say, my brother was the happiest person on the planet, and all eyes in the house were pointing to Lola, our father and mother were proud of "how far had she come", but my other sisters were less than amused.
It was jealousy, the kind that a competitive house would have for Lincoln's attention, but also the kind of not being on the receiving end of the gift.
Then, I looked at my former roommate, her eyes had another thing to tell, it was also jealousy, but it frightened me, it made me worry about the possible consequences from here and on, Lola had to be more careful next time.
Then I looked at her twin, and she was deep in thought, being the only other member in the house with constant interactions with Lola, I knew that there was something big going on in her head.
Lola, of course, was blissfully unaware. Who would have know? only having eyes for the person in front of you hugging you tightly could blind you from reading the room.
She had to be more cautious, but that would just be a part of her first real battle: Delusion.
A few days later, Lana came to ask me, her suspicions were justified, but Lola had been quite clever about explaining it, so I just played along.
- She's telling the truth, I could hear her talking with Lincoln about a grand prize, the TV was just a part of the price, the bigger gift she just gave it to that boy - I vividly remember telling Lana, making her concerns go, as she went along the day.
Now, the bigger problem was… Lynn Jr.
The amount of times that I had to convince her to stay in the room, to not go spy on Lincoln's door, to not confront the princess herself… I don't remember ever having to raise my voice with as much confidence in a clear Lie before.
Then… time went on, I was asleep, but I heard it… everyone did.
Lynn and Lincoln were arguing, in the middle of the hallway, at 5:00 AM or something, the commotion made everyone else wake up.
"So this is why you don't hang around with us anymore huh? Did the little brat suck your dick that good? bet it must have felt great you fucking pedo!" - Probably the strongest words I, and all the others had heard in the house, to think that all it took was an unfortunate timing between her going for a drink and Lola "Slipping out" of Lincoln's room.
As expected, Lynn was scolded and grounded hard, Lola had won… for now…
Crisis averted, at the cost of a sister, Lynn began dating Chandler, a known bully of Lincoln, and ever since, her relationship with the family became gradually shifted to a cellphone. Then, Luan left the house, that's when I officially claimed this room as mine alone…
And lost all connection with her.
That's when it became accepted, Lincoln had a clear favorite, for everyone else, she was the clingy little sister that relies on her brother too much, for Lincoln, she was now his confidant, his main advisor and romance coach, and even his new favorite gaming partner at the house.
Yes, even Lana had been replaced by both parties, and I had to convince her that it was all "expected", as she too "Was almost never in the house" and "No longer shared a room with her".
Even then, being found out just one time wasn't enough for them to stop the "Night Visits", Lincoln and Lola argued for an excuse the very next day to appease the others in regards to Lynn's "inflammatory comment", insisted on it just being a "Princess intervention to her coach", and went on the day, apparently saved.
That of course, didn't stop them from doing it basically every day, but in an as long as nobody caught them again…
To be honest with myself, I'm getting tired of deflecting and withholding the truth, as it turns into a tickling time bomb which may affect my credibility as well, but I must keep doing this fight, I will continue supporting them, although, even I know that one day…
Lincoln will have to do that fight on his own, including the first step: Denial.