John Crichton has a bad day
Rating: K+
Disclaimer: I don't own Farscape or any of it's characters
Beeeeep! Beeeeep! Beeeeep! John Crichton jumped out of bed. Fell out of bed. Whatever. What was that noise? He saw a DRD next to his bed. 'What is a DRD doing next to my bed?' John wondered. Then he remembered. Yesterday he had been telling Pilot about the wonderful invention called the 'alarm clock'. "Pilot! Will you shut that thing up?"
"So sorry Commander. I had the DRD next to your bed so you could turn it off like you did on your home world."
"And how do I do that, Pilot? I don't see an 'Off' button anywhere." John challenged. "Do I get you to turn it off every morning?"
"If you wish. However, I may not be able to respond straight away, as I would be busy."
"Uh,huh. Whatever. How 'bout I alter it then? A button here, a button there, lots of buttons everywhere. I could start after breakfast."
"That would not be necessary. I am sure Officer Sun would be delighted to do it for you." Pilot said, knowing that Aeryn would probably not be delighted. John knew it as well, and he was hurt. "I wont break it. I promise. Please mum!" He begged. Pilot sighed.
"Very well. However, if you do break it in any way…" He left the threat hang.
"Message received loud and clear boss." John said, even though he was nervous. He knew the punishment for breaking a DRD: Having to move out of his quarters, becoming a nomad on Moya, or staying with Scorpius. John gulped when he thought of that. Maybe he would ask Aeryn. He fainted at the thought.
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John Crichton woke up, to find him self eye-to-stalk with a DRD. "Hey." John said to it. 1812 beeped. Then it disappeared. "Rygel!" John shouted, sitting up. "You ate my pet DRD!" Then he said, calmer, "Hey, Rygel? Did you know that some humans eat frogs?" Rygel fled, farting helium as he went to propel him self along faster. In his fright, he couphed up the red, white, and blue DRD. Scared that Rygel would eat him again, 1812 scooted over to its 'owner'. It beeped, asking for protection from the Hynerian. When Rygel had gone, 1812 beeped again. Thanks for scaring him away. It meant to say. What came out was something like "Beep beeep chirp beep."
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John was wondering around Moya. He decided to visit Sikozu. He started to walk in the door, when he saw a horrible sight: Scorpius. 'I'm never gonna get used to the fact that Scorpy has a girlfriend', John thought as he backed away. He ran to Chiana's quarters. This time he remembered to knock. "Yeah." Chi called out. Crichton walked in, and got another fright. "Who are you?" He asked the…Thing With The Red Lines On Its Face
"Ha Ha. What's the matter? Don't you like it? I saw human women using this stuff on Earth, and I wanted to try it my self ."
"Chi, I think lip stick is supposed to go on the lips." Crichton told her. Chiana noticed that her friend looked a little shaken. "What's the matter old man? Did Aeryn threaten to chuck you out of the air-lock?"
"No. I just saw Sikozu and Scorpy…kissing!" He shuddered. Chiana laughed, but John knew she was grossed out as well.
AN: Yeah. Stuck again. Any one else have ideas? What happens to John next?