Disclaimer : You really should know by now that this trash could never come from J.K.Even if this does contain delectable cookies.mmmmmm

My note: Well another story of cookies..Sigh it's a long road ahead.To anyone who reads this and enjoys it you should read my unfinished story The way the cookie crumbles and if you don't read it then you are just a bad person mmmkay! Enjoy!

1:The supposed shit demon

The dimly lit sinister looking room was being filled with maniacal laughter.

"MWAHAHAHAHA!"

There was a genius at work here and his carefully constructed plans wre going to work. DAMN IT!

He knew they were going to work.

"DRACO! I hear evilly triumphant laughter.WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!"

"Nothing!" Draco replied trying to do the whole innocent thing but not quite pulling it off.

"DON'T NOTHING ME YOU LITTLE FLOBBERWORM!" Bellatrix screamed storming up the stairs.Draco meeped .yes he Draco a malfoy meeped in fear and panic.He ran ( No thats not graceful enough for him! Oh I've got it! ) No he fretted around his room hiding his evil plans.He wanted the glory all for himself.After all the sidekicks don't get the hot chicks or guys.(whatever your into)

"Aunty Bell! I didn't hear you come in!You suprised me!"Draco cried out in pretend glee, hiding a palm ful of plans behind his back.

Of course it was impossible not to have heard her as she had just blasted his door down.

"What are you doing? And don't say nothing or I'll tell your parents about those magazines you've been reading! I know your up to something!"

" Me... Up to something!I wouldn't dream of scheming evilly behind your back!"

She gave him a death glare and stormed out.

"And THOSE MAGAZINES AREN'T MINE!...I'M HOLDING THEM FOR A FRIEND!" He shouted at her turned back.

Draco took the plans from behind his back and rubbed his face against them.

"Soon all the cookies shall be mine!..MW" He cut himself off and finished the last part quietly."hahahahahah,"

He lay his plan fondly on his desk and ran to his bed getting out his secret stash.Triple choc chip caramel cookies !He began stuffing his elegant face.

Draco sprawled out peacfully on his bed grasping an empty packet of cookies.He fell into a deep sleep which firstly consisted of world domination then strangely enough turned into a combination of cookies, crazy monkey sex and weasly in a Tu-tu.(Weasly in a Tu-Tu God No! Come on brain think of something more amusing.)Weasly being chased by a dragon.Draco smiled in his sleep which quickly turned into a frown as pansy came into his dream.Ugh! KILL IT ! KILL IT NOW! Using his amazing power of creation he turned her into one of those annoying little dogs that constantly hump your leg.Then a gallant Harry strode in and kicked the annoying little dog.A yelping pansy went flying through the air as Harry swooped over Draco and dipped him low in his arms.

"I SEE YOU!" Draco jolted awake at this intrusion of a suprisingly pleasant non- disturbing dream.

"AAAGH!" He screamed in horror and fell off his bed.He tried to run away but his legs got tangled in his blankets."IT" leant over him he struggled to escape panicking under the mess of blankets.Too late it had him now.

"Great Aunty Muriel"gulp"so nice to see you!"

"Come here my little Dray Dray." She licked her enormous lips and puckered up.Her hairy upper lip was looming over him.Draco broke out in a cold sweat.He could almost here the ominous suspense music off that ridiculous muggle movie Jaws.

He closed his eyes,screwed up his face and took the hit.

He felt like he was being swallowed whole by a crater dwelling mutant slug.The slobber clinging to him and the moustache grazed his skin.Her nose was crushing his,her enormous bejewelled hands dug into his cheeks.Draco suddenly realised he wasn't breathing,he clawed the air in one last plee.Then it was all over spit clinging to him,his eyes unfocused and welts remained in his skin from the sausage fingers.

Muriel left .Probably looking for another victim to suck the soul out of thought draco bitterly wiping his face.

OH GOD WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT! a feeling of disgust and horror swept over him as he felt something trying to climb it's way up his throatHe ran to his bathroom and began gagging over his solid silver toilet.The remains of what was triple choc chip caramel cookies specially imported from europe landed in the toilet.Draco closed his eyes hoping to merlin that he had just imagined it..He opened one eye,nothing.He heaved a sigh of relief and rested his head in his arms.

"Ey You! I owe ya one! Jeez louise that bloody beast swallowed me whole!"

Draco raised his head in alarm and looked down at the contents of his toilet.A small chocolate stained figure was slowly emerging.Draco screamed like a little girl and flushed.He ranto his bed and clutched his knees.He began chanting.

"Can't move shit demon will eat me!"

he named it shit demon because of it's brown texture.

The mirror across the room reflected the pathetic imageand snorted ,teasing Draco.

"You call yourself a Malfoy!You're a pussy!Who apart from John Howard would be afraind of the contents of his own toilet."

there is more if you review if you don't well then I shall simply give up.Then I shall go and eat a whole tub of cookie dough .Damn it's going to go straight to my thighs.

Sigh.

Thanx 2 anyone who reads this and reviews if you don't review then I pray that all your cookies will contain semen.Yes I will make sure all the cookies you eat are RUINED!RUINED I TELLS YOU!

Buh -Bye

love da queen