Rowan stared up at the walls of books. They filled shelves from the floor to the ceiling, the bindings varying in color and condition. Some of the books seemed brand new while others looked like they would fall apart if you pulled it off the shelf. Armin had one of those books open on one of the tables scattered through the library. Clouds of dust had formed from the pages and Rowan had to step away to stop inhaling the particles. Armin was gently paging through the book, his touch careful and calculated. He took great care to follow the turn of the page with his hand, ensuring the book stayed in one piece.
"So what are Mikasa and Eren up to today?" Rowan inquired, not really interested in staring at maps of the world beyond the walls today. Armin glanced up, a frown on his lips.
"No idea. Why?" He met her gaze and she shrugged.
"Dunno. Just curious I guess. You three are usually connected at the hip." She wasn't exaggerating either. They were always together, even though Eren and Mikasa had no interest in the library. They usually still entertained Armin and sat with him inside the stuffy building, but they were absent today.
"I suppose Eren is training with the ODM gear. He took today's failure pretty hard so I'm sure Mikasa is out there with him." He spoke thoughtfully.
"Yeah what's with them anyway?" Mikasa seemed overly protective of Eren, her eyes always locked on him. Not that it was any of Rowan's business, but she was curious. She didn't know their history like Armin did.
"What do you mean?" Oh sweet, clueless Armin.
"She watches his every move. The guy can't even breathe without her watching every inhale and exhale. If I didn't know them, I'd honestly be concerned for Eren's safety." She chuckled, thinking back to dinner the night prior. She sat in between Mikasa and Eren and only made it ten minutes before she had to swap seats with her. The staring wasn't even directed at her and it made her uncomfortable. She didn't understand how Eren put up with it.
"Oh, well, we all grew up together. Mikasa has always looked out for Eren like that. I guess it all started when Mikasa moved in with Eren's family." Armin spoke thoughtfully, stare distant.
"Oh, so they're siblings?" They definitely didn't act like it, but Rowan only had her own siblings to base it off of. She didn't really pay much attention to the other kids back in her village.
"No, not exactly." He shook his head and Rowan was lost,
"Not exactly? How'd they live together and grow up together, but not be siblings?" Even if they weren't blood related, she feels like they would still be similar to siblings.
"Well...Mikasa's parents were killed when she was young. She was kidnapped and Dr. Yaeger brought Eren to visit them. That's when they found the bodies and noticed Mikasa was missing." He spoke softly, his gaze locked on his shaking hands. Rowan was at a loss for words. She had no idea Mikasa's past was that dark. "Eren went off to find her. At a young age, he murdered Mikasa's kidnappers in self defense. After that, Mikasa went to live with them. She has always been very…. aware of Eren." He cleared his throat and Rowan's eyes widened.
"Eren murdered people?" She was totally lost now. How was that okay? How could he even manage at such a young age?
"It was self defense Rowan. I'm only telling you because I trust you, okay? Eren saved Mikasa that day and Mikasa promised Eren's mother that she would always look out for him. His mom...she was killed by a Titan. It was the last thing Mikasa promised her." Well, that explained a lot about the group's whole dynamic. Eren and Mikasa had dark and tragic pasts. She was sure Armin's past was warped by tragedy too, but she didn't want to pry.
"I won't tell anyone or judge them for it. It's just really shocking. Looking at them now, I wouldn't think it was possible." Rowan pictured her friends. Eren was determined to slaughter Titans, but didn't have the strength to back it up quite yet. She couldn't imagine him taking down adult kidnappers. Then there was Mikasa. She was ruthless and skilled, but never used her skill against another person.
"I killed two of the kidnappers and Mikasa killed the last one to save me. She stabbed him right through the back. Kill or be killed. It didn't just apply to Titans for us. We did what we had to do to survive." Eren startled them both, him and Mikasa walking into the library. Eren was covered in sweat and mud, his fists clenched.
"You both are bad asses, then and now. I respect what you had to do to survive." Once Rowan got over her initial shock, she realized how true Eren's words were. Kill or be killed. It's never something she had to think about in her village, but life within the walls was nothing like the life she knew. "Though, shouldn't you be better at hand to hand combat Eren?" Rowan teased and Eren scowled at her.
"I can take you down right now. Let's go." Eren launched forward, but Mikasa grabbed his arm.
"It's not the time or place Eren." She spoke softly and he yanked his arm away.
"I was kidding, honest. I just wanted to lighten the mood. It's a bit too heavy for my liking." She raised her hands, stepping back behind the table with Armin.
"You signed up to get eaten by Titans. I think the mood should be the least of your worries." Conny and Sasha came walking in behind Mikasa and Eren. Conny smirked, hopping up on the table across from them. Sasha hurried over to Rowan and slipped her hand under her jacket.
"Here." She gestured for Rowan to step closer before slipping a few cookies into her hand. "I found these in the kitchen. They're cinnamon cookies and I know how you like sweets." She smirked mischievously before sinking her teeth into a cookie of her own.
"Thanks Sasha. You really gotta stop stealing things from the kitchen though. They're going to catch you one day." Rowan chuckled, savoring the cinnamon on her tongue. The cookie was soft and melted in her mouth. It did truly hit the spot. Sweets were typically reserved for the commanding officers. Sometimes the soldiers got some, but never the recruits.
"Eh, I doubt it. I'm good at what I do." Sasha beamed before hopping over to sit beside Conny.
"She's not wrong. Her timing was immaculate and I kept watch just in case." Conny hit his knuckles against Sasha's before eating a cookie from his pocket. He munched away happily, kicking his legs back and forth. "Wait, did you guys hear about Annie?" He blurted and though Rowan planned on leaving to get her evening jog in, she hesitated.
"Apparently she kicked Reiner's ass in hand to hand combat today." Sasha mumbled through her full mouth.
"There's no way. Reiner is one of the strongest. He could take Annie any day." Eren spoke up, his eyes wide.
"Apparently not. She didn't even break a sweat. Everyone is saying her and Mikasa are the top two for hand to hand combat." Conny shrugged, leaning back on the table,
"Pfft. Sure. It's not like hand to hand combat matters anyway. It doesn't even count towards our rank." Eren huffed, glaring at the ground.
"Hold on. It doesn't?" Rowan spat, her fists clenched. She worked her ass off to kick Bertholdt and Ymir's asses. Those fights weren't easy and she was left with a layer of bruises on her limbs, despite her victory.
"No. They told us that on the first day Rowan." Armin glanced at her in confusion and Rowan puffed her cheeks out.
"Ah, well. That definitely went over my head." She scratched the back of her head, thinking back to the first day. In fairness, she didn't pay too close attention to the rank breakdown. She knew she wanted to join the Scouts, so it didn't matter if she ranked high in the class or not.
"Maybe you should pay more attention. It's boring, but it matters." Conny chuckled and Rowan rolled her eyes.
"Sure, I'll start paying more attention when you stop dozing off during practical skills class." Rowan jabbed him in the side as she wandered over to the other side of the library,
"I already know how to survive in the woods. I don't need a whole class on it." He waved her off and she stuck her tongue out at him.
"Sure. That's why you almost ate the poisonous berries."
"That was one time! I was hungry and they all looked good." He snapped back and Rowan laughed.
"True. They looked the juiciest." Sasha chimed in and Rowan laughed even harder.
"Whatever you guys say. I'm going to head out. I want to get a few laps in before dinner." Rowan waved to her friends and they all echoed goodbyes. Right before she ducked out, Sasha tucked another cookie in her jacket pocket. She chuckled, thanking her friend. She jogged out of the library, leaving her friends behind her. They all thought she was crazy for running more than they were assigned, but running helped her clear her head. It gave her an hour or so of peace and quiet with the wind whipping her hair back. She took off down the familiar trail, enjoying the evening sun warming her skin. She kicked up into a sprint, pumping her legs as fast as they could go until her favorite tree came into view. She pushed herself even harder, excited to take a breather under her tree. That was, until a familiar figure came into view under the tree. Captain Levi glanced up to see her sprinting right towards him. She dug her heels into the ground, slowing her momentum enough so that she came to a halt right in front of him.
"Really? First, you make me scrub horse shit off the walls. Now, you steal my tree?" She grumbled, leaning over onto her knees to catch her breath. Captain Levi scowled, staring her down.
"I didn't steal anything. This has been my tree for years." He quipped and she puffed her cheeks out.
"No. No, it's my tree. This is the second time you've been out here. I've been here every damn day." She argued, stomping her foot into the ground. She just wanted to sprawl out in the plush grass and enjoy the rustling of the leaves.
"I don't see your name on it." He stated, his eyes narrowed.
"I'm not going to carve my name into the tree! That harms the tree and I'm not an asshole." She pointed her finger at him.
"Tch." He glanced away from her, losing interest in the conversation. Rowan studied him for a moment before dropping down onto the grass anyway. She enjoyed the scratchy, yet plush feeling against her sweaty skin. "What are you doing?"
"This is my routine. I sprint here and enjoy some time with my tree and then I sprint back." She mumbled, trying to focus on the rustling of the leaves.
"Why?"
"Because I just want a moment to myself. Is that so much to ask? I want to feel normal, just for an hour or so everyday. Why do you come out here? I'm sure you have better things to do." She was a bit snappy with her response, but he deserved it.
"I suppose I come here for the same." Her eyes snapped open and she blinked up at the clear sky for a moment. She turned her head, studying Captain Levi who was leaning against the trunk of the tree with his eyes shut. He looked peaceful, his harsh features relaxed slightly. She had no idea what Captain Levi's life was like, but she was certain of one thing. The Captain definitely needed a break from the constant battle. She could understand that.
"Sir?" He didn't acknowledge her, but she continued anyway. "I think I can handle sharing the tree."
"Oh thanks. I'm glad you think you can handle it." He huffed, eyes still shut. She sat up, freeing the cookie from her pocket. She broke it in half and extended one half to him.
"Here sir." She was smiling and his eyes opened, narrowing at the cookie.
"Where'd you get that from?" He took it, studying the cookie.
"Oh...you know, I just found it." She mumbled, shoveling her half into her mouth.
"Found it or stole it?" He fixed his glare on her and she tensed.
"Found. Definitely found." She nodded her head and he sniffed it.
"We were supposed to have cinnamon cookies this evening, but someone broke into the kitchen." He spoke flatly and Rowan hopped up onto her feet.
"You know, this was a great chat. Enjoy the tree. I should get going. Have a good night Sir!" She turned on her heels and sprinted off down the trail, not even looking back when she said goodbye. The last thing she wanted was to get blamed for breaking into the kitchen or get Sasha and Conny in trouble. She glanced over her shoulder just to see Captain Levi watching her sprint away like a fool.