When Shane leads Rick outside, he knows Rick is unsettled and nervous, but he feels his heart ache at just how Rick's body language seems to expect he's delivering bad news. Rather than immediately start speaking when they reach the backyard, he hauls the other man close for a hug stout enough it feels like he's making up for all the ones missed in the past two years. Rick melts into the embrace, resting his head against Shane's shoulder and making a low-pitched whine that makes Shane wonder just how close Rick is to the point of no return.
It's a very real concern. Shane should have had the mindset to survive the world turning upside down, and he'd watched it happen gradually. He still came so close to shattering to pieces that he still has the occasional nightmare about the thoughts he had back at the Greene farm.
Rick had spent his entire life believing himself to be a good man. Hell, if anyone Shane knew qualified for that title, Rick was top of the list. What this dire world has done to Rick is far harsher than what it did to Shane, who already knew that darkness existed far more than light.
Resting his hand against the back of Rick's neck, Shane takes a deep breath. "Luuk advocated for everyone going to the island. You'll need to spend a significant time with one of the psychologists there, but everyone's got to see them at least a few times."
That makes Rick raise his head. "How much did you grumble about that?"
Considering Shane had always detested the occasional need to be assigned to see a shrink to return to duty, it's a fair question. He shrugs as Rick eases away just a bit, not going far enough that their arms aren't still brushing.
"After all we'd been through, I was honestly a little grateful for the requirement. Made it easier to show up to appointments." He smiles sheepishly at Rick. "Technically, I'm still scheduled once a month. Beth goes a little more often."
While they had both been cleared fairly quickly as being mentally stable, after that first month of weekly appointments, Beth had kept going every other week or so. It had made Shane realize that having someone neutral to talk things over with every month wasn't a bad thing, and it helped track his progress in a way. With the baby coming, he's especially glad he kept going.
"Carol wanted me to talk to Denise," Rick admits. "Once she realized Denise was a psychiatrist before, she wanted us all in therapy."
"I'm guessing you didn't."
"No. All the kids except Judy meet with Denise, but honestly, most of us adults have dragged their feet about it. At first, I didn't trust that she was one of Deanna's people. Since then, it was easy to claim there wasn't time."
"That's not a viable excuse in Montserrat. No one's in danger or starving. To be honest, I don't expect they'll be pushing many of the folks here into a full routine quickly. They don't need warm bodies, and y'all need the recovery time."
This will be the reprieve that Rick needs, as well as all of those that survived the prison's fall and Terminus. The Saviors are just another layer to the trauma, and Shane is grateful that those in charge back home understand the difference between people gone truly rogue and those that can still find their way back. He's not entirely sure he could return to Montserrat with a clear conscience if any of his or Beth's family is left behind. He'd have to go, because Beth having good care for the pregnancy is the most important thing, but he'd feel far more guilty about that choice than the one where he walked away from the farm.
"Carol and I had agreed to send the kids even if we couldn't go."
The haunted look on Rick's face makes Shane feel hopeful. The old Rick really would have sent Carl away rather than keep him in a more risky world. If Rick hasn't lost that sense of putting Carl first, he'll recover with enough time and help.
Before Shane can reply, Rick continues. "I know that Judith will go back to Beth, and it's even better for her that it includes you as her father. But Carl and the other kids adore her. Living apart from her is going to be hard for them to adjust to."
That's an aspect of reconciliation that Shane hasn't yet thought about, but the solution might be an obvious one. He doesn't think Beth will object to what he's about to suggest. "Where Beth and I live are a few other cottages and houses nearby, and none of them are currently occupied. That keeps all the kids close, and they can just roam between houses as much as they like."
A larger house for all of them, somewhat like they have here in Alexandria, might work as well, but Shane isn't putting that option on the table without talking to Beth first. Their little place is cozy and carefully made into their own by Beth. She might not want to start over in a new place, even with those she considers family. But both neighboring houses are close enough that even Judith's tiny legs could make the walk, so the other kids really could explore as they like without someone constantly on alert.
"Carol would probably love that idea. She loved the idea of keeping this place viable, so that the kids had a safe and sort of normal place to grow up." Rick gives him a mournful look. "I wasn't the father I promised to be for Judith. All that anger I had about not being her father, and I didn't step up. But Carl's always lived up to being her big brother."
"Damn, Rick. I would never take that away from Carl. You know how much I love him." Shane's had time to untangle 'uncle' and 'father' in his head where Carl is concerned, but clarifying the terms doesn't change how he feels about Carl one bit. The fiercely blooming love he feels for Judith is a newborn one compared to the long-established feeling for the boy he's watched grow up. "Carl will always have a place anywhere I am. Always."
It's Rick that initiates the hug this time, and Shane's grateful for it. Things could have gone so very badly with this reunion, and so far, there's been only relief and a few stumbles. It gives him hope that Maggie will come around once she's well enough to understand Beth isn't a hallucination of some sort. Beth might not crave her sister's company like she once would have, but they are still sisters, and their children should have the chance to grow up together, if they can.
"Guess we should go tell Carol we've got a long trip to get ready for, yeah?" Rick says when he finally turns Shane loose.
The fact that Carol and Rick are a couple puzzles Shane, but at the same time, he can understand it. As unsettled as Rick is, having someone who seems so solidly aware of who she is seems perfect. The fact that she's devoted enough to Rick that she refused to abandon him makes Shane curious to learn more about what changed between the two between the prison's fall and now.
That's a curiosity to satisfy once they're safely back home, he thinks. For now, they possibly have entire communities to figure out how to move thousands of miles away, and that's a logistics puzzle that will need all their concentration and cooperation.
It doesn't surprise Beth that Daryl agrees easily to not broadcast the pregnancy to anyone else until Beth does. After the scare everyone had with Maggie even before the Saviors, he understands that she prefers to tell everyone on her own timetable, which isn't going to be all that delayed. Daryl being delicate in his interactions with her can be written off as part of his reaction to her miraculous return.
"How's the hunting around here?" Beth asks as they head back downstairs to rejoin the others. Food may be scarce here, but she can't imagine certain animals haven't managed to thrive even this close to a city the size of D.C.
"Not much in the way of deer or rabbit. Seen some feral hogs around, but these folks are still a bit stuck on the idea of food coming in boxes and cans." Daryl sounds completely affronted by the idea.
"You think maybe it would be safe to go hunting?" Beth doesn't want to leave Judith behind again, even just for a few hours, but at the same time, the communal nature of Judith's raising is the best one for their world. It won't do either of them any good to spend all their waking hours together.
Daryl pauses at the bottom of the stairs, thinking it over. "Any of those military guys you brought along hunt?"
"Yeah. Most everyone who goes off island can hunt, in case they get stranded somewhere. Most of the islands have their own version of wildlife now, especially those that didn't have a huge human population." She flashes an impish smile at him. "I did mean that I'd be going, Daryl. All the things I let slide back at the prison? I finally learned them."
She understands the conflict that Daryl is undergoing. He wants desperately to keep her safe, but safe these days is a much broader definition than staying behind walls. Curiosity flickers into place as he visibly overcomes the protective brotherly instinct.
"You hunted pigs before?"
Laughing, Beth leads him into the living area while telling him of the first time she got to put pork on the table for her and Shane, all those months ago in Puerto Rico. That draws the others in, and after much discussion once Shane and Rick venture back inside, a hunting party is organized. Carl and Sophia hold some sort of hushed discussion that Beth notices ends up in a game of rock, paper, scissors before Sophia announces she's joining the hunt and Carl's babysitting Judy.
Although the population here is nothing like Daryl says Georgia was managing before they came north, finding the sounder of pigs Daryl's seen previously isn't hard. Unlike deer, they are traveling in large enough numbers to leave the distinctive trail Shane taught Beth to look for. It makes for a successful hunt of three pigs, which they haul back to Alexandria.
Half the folks are wary and avoid the butchery, but Beth's glad to see that a good number venture out to watch. A few even ask intelligent questions about both hunting and farmed meat, but after a single pig, Beth leaves the rest to the other hunters and takes Sophia to clean up. She's been away from Judith long enough.
As she emerges from the bathroom, Sophia's waiting, holding something in her hands and looking pensive. It takes Beth a minute to recognize the necklace she thought lost months ago in her escape through the walker-infested streets of Atlanta.
"Where did you find that?" she asks softly, reaching out to take the jewelry. The original chain was replaced by a leather cord back at the prison, making it an unusual look for a cross.
"Mom found it in some stuff at that hospital. It's why we thought you were the girl who ran away and died."
"It must have come off in the backseat of the car." Beth smiles brightly at Sophia. "Have you had it all this time? You weren't wearing it yesterday."
"I had it put away somewhere safe, so it would be Judy's one day. I wore it for a while, but Maggie tried to take it from me. At the hospital, Daryl made her leave me be after I punched her. Then when she found out she was pregnant, she kept asking for it, but I said no. It was going to be all Judy would ever have of you."
Tears shimmer in Sophia's eyes as she speaks, and she wraps her thin arms around herself. Beth studies the necklace for a moment before unfastening the cord and reaching out to settle it around Sophia's neck before hugging her.
"Well, now Judy's got me back and so do you. And I say that my mama would have loved for you to wear it for as long as you want to." Beth loves the cross, something her mother wore as long as she can remember, but she has her parents' wedding bands on Shane's chain around her neck now. "Did you really punch Maggie?"
Sophia wipes away the tears that trickle down her cheeks before flashing a smile that is suspiciously Dixon. "Bloodied her nose and said I would hit her with something harder if she said Judy wasn't your real daughter again."
A flash of anger sizzles along Beth's nerves at the words. It's one thing to remember those signs and know Maggie gave up her up for dead so easily. In their world, such losses are almost a matter of time, and coming to terms with what Maggie's thought processes might be right after Hershel's horrific death is part of why Beth's stuck with seeing her counselor long after the required time. But to deny Judith's place in her life?
"I guess I'll be having a long chat with my sister once she's feeling a little better. But if she says anything about that necklace again, I won't be offended if you give her another nosebleed. Not one bit."
It's childish, and both her parents would have hated to see their girls at odds, but Beth thinks they'd also understand. Neither of them would have allowed Maggie to bully a teenager into giving up the necklace, heirloom or not, and Hershel had certainly loved Judith as much as if she were his granddaughter by blood. She can almost hear her father's voice chiding Maggie about what really makes a family.
"Let's try to get that settled without me explaining why Sophia punched a pregnant woman."
Carol at least looks amused as she stops at the top of the landing, Judith perched on her hip. She sets the toddler on her feet, letting Judith cross the remaining space to hug Beth's knees and beg to be picked up. With her daughter in her arms, Beth just smirks at Carol.
"Alright. I'll punch Maggie for Sophia. It'll keep it even."
Although just this morning, she'd cautioned Daryl on keeping the news to himself, she knows the reality is that should the unspeakable happen, there's no way she wouldn't want Carol at her side. Sophia's old enough to understand that complications happen, between them losing Lori and Maggie's health scare. What they need now is joy.
Carol makes the connection easily, although Sophia just looks confused. "Oh, Bethie," Carol breathes out softly. "I'm so happy for you. When?"
There's no hesitation or worry in Carol's expression, just a pure sort of happiness that chases away the dregs of Beth's anger at Maggie's conflict with Sophia.
"I'm due on New Year's Eve, so nine weeks in."
That brings Sophia on board, and she grins so broadly that Beth thinks it ought to hurt. "So we get two babies, not just one."
That makes Carol smirk. "At least two."
Beth laughs, shaking her head and kissing Judith's forehead when she lays her head against Beth's shoulder and toys with a strand of loose, damp hair. "There was only one baby on my ultrasound."
She's just going to ignore the arched brow Carol adopts.
"Does anyone else know?" Sophia asks.
"I told Daryl this morning."
"That explains why he can't seem to settle on an expression between worried as hell or won the lottery," Sophia says. "When are you going to tell Carl?"
"At supper tonight." There's a lot to be caught up on, such as just how many people will be making the voyage back to Montserrat, and Beth has to arrange to make the trip back to Hilltop soon. She isn't sure how things will pan out with Maggie, but she worries about Abraham as well, and she figures the others do, too.
If all three of them are smiling a bit goofy, no one really comments as they rejoin the others. There's still so much to sort out, and Beth thought finding Montserrat and the community there boosted her spirits, but it's nothing on being surrounded by those she thought was dead. Beth's going to do everything in her power to make sure they all stay safe, because her heart certainly can't take losing her family again.