AN: I saw a review and also got some notes from friends about the darker aspects not really being there and having a more romcom theme so far, but trust me that is coming I was just finding my stride with the first 2 chapters. Also sorry for any errors I'm typing this on a phone as I don't have a laptop or pc. Thanks for understanding and I hope you enjoy!
If the text is like this, it's a thought.
If the text is like this, it's an AN.
"I'd like to join your p-p-p-p-party please!"
My luck is finally kicking in.
She was hot! Like really hot! And totally my type! Nice blonde hair, and one hell of a rack! Hold on, wayyyyy too close. And I've gotta make sure she isn't crazy like Megumin.
"You really wanna join? What class are you?" I had learnt from my mistakes this time.
"M-My calling is t-that of a Crusader! I-I can be y-your shield!"
Huh. Seems pretty useful.
"Y-Yes! I would love to take hits for you and your party! Yes! U-Use me! A-Ah~"
Uhh... What? Did... Did she just fucking moan?! I knew she'd be weird!
"What did you do to t-those girls? W-Why were they all... Slimy~ Ah- Ah~ I'm-"
Did she just... I'm gonna be sick.
"Uh, I'm not feeling too good, I think I drank too much"
I ran out before she had a chance to respond. I also tore down our poster for party members... Come to think of it I never saw what it said did I? Let's give it a read, shall we?
'Looking for party members for Aqua, the beautiful and wonderful Arch-Priest!
Must be an advanced class and willing to buy me beer.
Quotes from members!
Person A: I joined this party and I've been so happy everyday!
Person B: Aqua is so smart and amazing! I'd buy her beer any day!
If interested please seek out Aqua and Kazuma Satou.
Warning: Kazuma's kinda... Creepy.
To help you find us, I, the beautiful and kind Aqua, have blue hair and am absolutely stunning. Kazuma's and ugly bastard, but he's okay, I guess.'
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?! THIS BULLSHIT?! NO WONDER WE'VE BEEN GETTING WEIRDOS! SHE MADE IT SOUND LIKE HELL! NOBODY WHO ISN'T WEIRD WOULD EVEN CONSIDER JOINING THIS! ALSO,' Kazuma's kinda creepy'. GREAT WAY TO CONVINCE SOMEONE AQUA.
Ugh... Fucks sake... I'm taking her beer away.
--
A few days later
--
I walked into the guild hall to check out today's quest, not to mention get something to eat, I didn't get dinner after all (thanks to a certain crusader interrupting me)
To my surprise, Megumin was already inside eating, so I went and sat with her.
"Morning Megumin-" I grumbled, only to be cut off by a loud rumble.
She gave me a knowing look before handing me the menu.
Eh, maybe she's not so, bad after all.
"Kazuma, Kazuma! Can you take me on our explosion walk a little earlier today?"
Nevermind.
But I didn't mind much, I had really enjoyed our walks when we went on them. We had only gone on a few, after all she'd barely been in the party a week. Even though it hadn't been long, we already started to know each other a little better. I realized that, behind the chunni tendencies, she was actually a really nice girl, unless explosion magic is involved. Damn she can be annoying sometimes. Though, when she's being nice, I really do enjoy the time with her. Shes quite interesting actually, especially when she talks about her village. Turns out the 'Crimson Demons' were actually a race with much better magic capabilities and mana capacity than the average person. I'm starting to be able to tell the difference between explosions too, so if she falls on her face when she collapses I'll give her a description, which she seems to be really grateful for.
"Sure I guess... Quick question though, could you please explain how the fuck skill points work?"
Having taken out four of the five toads we had to kill, I had grown to level 6, and had some skill points I could use! If had any idea on how to use them that is. I tried figuring it out last night, but I gave up eventually.
"Easy. You just get someone to teach you a skill, and then it'll show up on your card, then you just learn it with points!" she replied with a smile.
She continued, "Most spells you could learn with just a demonstration, but others you might need lessons if they're more complicated."
"So I could technically learn explosion if I wanted?"
"Yes! You could! In fact, you should! Will you walk the Crimson path of explosions with me? Please?! I mean, if you think about it there's no spell more worth knowing if you think about it!"
I beg to differ. But I'll play along I guess.
"I don't have nearly enough points at the minute, but I'd love to learn it some day"
Her face lit up instantly, and she stared at me with stars in her eyes
I have a feeling she's the clingy type... Hmm... That could get annoying
"You said you had drank too much when we last spoke, so we didn't get to finish our conversation"
Tell me that's not who I think it is...
I spun on my bench to face the exact woman I didn't want to see.
Oh for FUCKS SAKE.
"So, could I joi-"
"No! No no no no no!"
She hugged herself tightly and squirmed.
Gross.
I noticed the girl stood behind everyone's least favorite Crusader, she had short, silver hair and a scar on her cheek. Total tomboy type to boot. Aqua seemed to be staring daggers at her for some reason.
"That's not how you talk to new people Darkness! Also... Can you like... Not?" She continued,to me this time. "Name's Chris. Heard you were looking for some skills huh? Well if you'd like I'd be happy to teach you some thief skills for the cost of a beer"
"Seems like a good deal to me!"
I had a total of five skill points to burn, so I had Chris teach me some skills, first I learnt 'Detect Enemy' which lets you know where hostiles are, and how many there are, but that's the extent of it. I can't tell what they are, but apparently there's a skill that can do that. Next, I learnt 'Detect Trap', which is what it sounds like. Just Detect Enemy with traps instead of enemies. After that, I learnt lurk, which hides your presence to monsters and people. Pretty useful! Then, I learnt a skill called gambit, it lowers your defensive stats greatly, but increases attack, agility, and surprisingly, luck. Chris warned me not to use this one unless necessary, because if I'm already not doing so good, then I could get one shot. Lastly, my favorite of the bunch, Steal. The higher your luck, the better chance of getting something good! The perfect skill for me!
"And that's all of 'em! Just have a look at your adventurer card, select the skills, and click learn!"
I did as she said, and felt a strange warmth envelop me for just a moment.
"Because I'm feeling nice, I'll demonstrate steal again for you... Fufufu..."
"Uh that's really not neede-"
"Steal!"
I checked my pockets... Yup. There goes my wallet. Shit.
"hehehe... You know, why don't you try to steal your wallet back? If you're lucky you might even steal my dagger, it's worth 400,000 Eris!"
Hell yeah! Finally something fantasy like!
She continued "but if you're unlucky... You might just get these pebbles!"
She smirked, beckoning me to accept.
"Deal."
"Hehe-"
"Steal!"
I felt something strangely... Soft? Definitely not the dagger... But not the wallet either...
I held my hands up in mid air and pulled them apart.
Genuine mother fucking panties.
Jackpot! Yes! This is way better than some dagger!
Hold on... Shit abort mission! People already think I'm a creep! I'll be an outcast if they find out about this!
I discreetly handed them back to Chris and apologized, oh how I wished I could have done anything but that.
Luckily, Chris was fine once I apologized, she seemed to believe it was an accident, which to be fair it was, but it worked in my favour nonetheless.
One hour later, back at the guild hall
Aqua and Megumin were still sat in the same spot, turns out they had waited for me, much to Aqua's annoyance.
I told them about the skills I had learnt, then I had an idea.
"You know what? I think I'll demonstrate one of the skills right now" I said with a devilish grin
"I'm going for your hat, Megumin! Steal!"
A second later, I felt a familiar feeling in my hands, that I had felt the last time I used this skill.
Oh no. Oh good lord no.
I pulled my hands apart, and yeah, history repeated itself.
She likes black huh... Why am I not surprised?
I handed them back to Megumin and apologized profusely, and after promising to buy her lunch for the next week, she forgave me.
I remembered that I should probably eat, the hunger was kinda getting to me, it had gone past being hungry, it just hurt now
"Well, now I'm finally gonna get some foo-"
Then, a loud message blared through the speakers that had (although surprisingly) already been invented in this world.
"Emergency Quest! All adventures please make your way to the main gate! Bring your gear!" x2
Why am I not surprised.
"Oh for fucks sake!"
Well... Guess I'm doing this now.
AN: Hello! I'm sorry this one took so long, had to rewrite it a few times as the dialogue was off in places and I also struggled with making some parts seem like the characters, so sorry about that! Thanks for reading, and I'll be trying to get at least 2 chapter a week out now, have a good day, and I'll see you soon!