AN: Don't have much to say here, so enjoy! (notes at the end)

I ran to the gates immediately, with my shabby blade in hand, completely terrified. I mean, this was an emergency quest! What the hell's going on?

We arrived at the gates, and I noticed a green haze barreling towards us

What the fuck?! Is that some kind of plague?!

"Okay everyone! Harvest season has begun! One cabbage is worth 10,000 Eris, so, make sure you get a lot!"

"Yeah!" x20

Wait... Cabbage?

I turned back to the haze approaching us, and they were already close, no doubt they'd be here in seconds.

And then... They arrived. And they were about as fast as a bullet train.

I heard a loud groan from my right, just to be faced with the sight of someones arm get snapped in 2. It was still attached but just barely.

Within seconds, many adventurers were incapacitated.

Fuck fuck fuck!

I turned around, and spotted that crusader from earlier protecting a knocked out mage, along with their party.

Looking over at Kim Jong-un's long lost daughter she appeared to be chanting... But the Crusader was dead centre of the blast.

I froze. The image of her body getting turned to ash in an instant burned into my mind.

I was knocked out of my shock by a swift pain to my right arm, before looking over to it. Or, at least, where it used to be. It was completely gone. The only part left was just below my shoulder, but that was just a few inches of what used to be my arm.

I screamed.

It was taking everything I could to not black out from the pain, and even then I was barely holding on. And then...

"Explosion!"

Ah shit.

KA-BOOM!

The Shockwave from the blast seemingly made something in me snap. The pain numbed, and all I could feel was a coursing want within me. A want to get revenge on these little shit cabbages.

I spammed steal and lurk on the horde, wiping tons out in just a minute or so, before collapsing. I saw Aqua run over to me with Megumin on her back. She seemed overall disinterested, though Megumin seemed to be crying.

I heard a few sobs and sayings of my name, before letting the warmth of sleep wash over me.

Wait... It is sleep right?!

Part 2

I honestly don't even know anymore. I don't know fucking anything anymore. After seeing the life I got this time I though the whole 'death' thing would seem less... Appealing I guess? But I can't even tell. I don't think I'd like to die, but at the same time, it feels... Comforting. The thought of being gone. Nothing to care about. Nothing to worry about. I don't feel like I'd be leaving anything behind. There's nobody who'll miss me. Nothing I'll miss.

What am I saying? I can't fall back into this hole again. But then again...did I ever even get out of it? Did I even get better? Was... Was all of my progress just in my fucking head?! So that's it then! The one fucking thing I swore to myself to do was get better and I can't even fucking do that!

Slowly, but surely, I came back to consciousness. Prying my eyes open, I saw a very distraught Megumin holding my hand on my right, and looking up I saw a smiling Aqua patting my head.

"H-cough cough cough"

Looking down at the hand I coughed into, I saw a few clumps of dried blood staring back at me

"Don't worry that's normal!" Aqua said with a smile.

What?! What the hell about this is normal... Wait a minute how the fuck is my arm back?!

I voiced my concerns shortly after.

"I told you I could heal anything didn't I?"

Eh... Fair enough. Still weird though.

Wait... I feel like I'm forgetting something... The explosion... Shit! The Crusader!

"W-Wait is that crusader alright? She ... She's alive right?"

"Yeah, she's fine, it's you we were more worried about"

"Psh, speak for yourself Megumin! I knew he'd be fine because I'm here!"

Wait... Megumin what the fuck?! You nearly killed some girl and you were more worried about me?! Hell even if I died Aqua could still take you out for explosion trips! So... Why me?

I coughed a few more times, but waited to ask my questions until it was just me and Megumin. It just seemed too personal to say in front of Aqua, especially since she'd probably take things the wrong way.

We went to the to the guild hall to finally get some food. While I was there, I was told I had a reward to collect. I didn't think it would be much, but considering the cabbages were worth ten grand a piece, I hoped I'd at least get a decent amount.

"3 Million Eris?!"

I wasn't prepared for how much I got though.

As I ate, I reminded myself of the plan with Megumin tomorrow. Go early for her explosion trip to make up for this morning, then ask her about it on the way back.

Part 3

When the next day came around, I dragged my ass out of bed and set off to do exactly that.

Walking into the guild hall, I once again saw Megumin sat down eating. As the door opened, she turned and gave me the brightest smile I've ever seen. And just for a second, I could feel my heart skip a beat. A small blush invaded my face, but I acted like nothing happened and just went to eat with Megumin.

"Morning Kazuma!" she said, still smiling from ear to ear.

"Morning, Megumin. Jeez someones happy today, anything special happening or?"

"Nope! Just excited for my walk with my one and only..."

EXCUSE ME WHAT?!

"Explosion sommelier!" The smile on her face had become a mischievous grin, and I realized she had almost definitely noticed my nervousness.

At this point, I was blushing so hard the tips of my ears had gone red, though I still couldn't figure out why she made me so nervous so often.

Probably because if I say the wrong thing she could turn me to dust...Yeah that's it... Probably.

The rest of breakfast went on without much of note, Megumin eating away at a plate of cabbage, and Kazuma trying (and failing) to calm his nerves.

After eating as much fried cabbage as we could, we left for our explosion walk. The walk there was just the usual, and the explosion was quite a good one today. Not too much dust, heat wave and sound were nice and not too strong. It got 70 points. I was a little nervous still, but I knew this was my chance, so, once I worked up some courage, I took it.

"H-Hey Megumin?"

"Yeah?"

"Jeez how do I... M-Megumin... Why were you so worried about me?"

"Eh?"

"I mean... Even if the worst had happened... Aqua could always take you out for explosion right?... I just... Why? Why worry about me?"

Part 4

Megumin P.O.V

I could feel my stomach turn as he said those horrible words. Truth is, I knew how he felt about his life. I had learnt from Aqua that, like me, he had a habit of practically narrating his dreams.

And that's why, when I heard him talking about finding comfort in death, my heart sank.

Hearing him be so confused that someone would be worried about him hurt even more. According to Aqua, he hadn't had the best home life, and that he had struggled with his mental health through most of his life. Though, I didn't need her to tell me that. I had seen Yunyun enough times before a test to be able to see straight through his confidant act, and realize just how anxious he was, and it tore me up inside.

I needed to reassure him that his friends cared. The other adventures cared. That I cared.

"Kazuma I... We... Everyone they..."

But I couldn't find the words.

"No it's fine... I'm... I'm sorry for dumping this on you..."

No! Please you can talk to me! I just... I don't know how to say this...

Could that work? Fine. Whatever it takes. What is that? You'll see.

"N-No Kazuma. I... I want you to talk to me more... I want you to be more honest with me..."

I took a deep breath, and continued.

"I want you to be able to talk to me because I care about you. Because you're my friend Kazuma. The person who fed me before I could prove my worth. And who still does that, even after I let you down. My friend. One of, if not my best friend. The one who takes me out my explosion even though you aren't interested in them, all just to let me have my fun. And even though you complain, you still let me have those walks. You still bring me back. Everytime. And for that, I will always be grateful. And for someone to be spending my life with... You aren't so bad. Thank you so much Kazuma. You can always talk to me. I'll always be here to listen. For as long as I live."

Kazuma had tears in his eyes long before she had finished her speech. She was worried it sounded too much like a confession, but he didn't seem to notice. All he did was flip her around so they were facing each other, and hugged her as hard as he could.

"Thank you Megumin. So much... You have idea how much that means to me..."

"Anytime, Kazuma."

And that was how they stayed for a little while, just enjoying the embrace for what seemed like hours.

Eventually they made their way back to the guild hall, as they had taken so long just walking around and talking that it had started to get dark, though everyone noticed they were a lot closer after that day.

If only they knew.

AN: Thank you so much for reading, sorry this took so long, went back to school, though my break is during Easter, so expect more then! I hope you enjoyed, and I'll see you soon :D