Title: The highly educational demonstration of how to drive guys off

Written by Professional Scatterbrain.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

Rating: Pg – 13 to R

Summary: See challenge set by Karen U

#3 – Karen U

-Lita/Edge, Lita/Jeff, Lita/Christian, or Lita/Jericho.

-A bet between Lita and the divas in which Lita says that she know sure fire ways to drive guys off (Lita is, of course, down about her love life).

-Instead of being driven off, the guy falls for her, and Lita, of course, falls for him as well.

-Happy endings.

-No roster split.

-Other divas should be chosen from the following (at least three other divas): Stacy, Stephanie, Lillian, Torrie, Dawn Marie, Victoria, Ivory, Trish: I chose Stephanie, Torrie, and Dawn Marie.


Chp7: Guys' night.


Unaware of what Stephanie had just persuaded her two friends into doing, Jeff was a sitting duck.

Sitting in a corner booth in a greasy looking dinner, he and four of his best friends waited for their meals to arrive. They did this each month. It was a regular occurrence that, although being altered over the years, had not been discontinued like many of the friendships that they once had.

Weeks ago the very table they were sitting at had been filled with one additional person.

Chris Jericho.

Months ago it had been filled with two other people.

Edge and Matt Hardy.

Years ago it had been filled with four other people.

Andrew 'Test' Martin, and the three Dudley Brothers.

Now, it was just filled with five friends instead of the original twelve.

It was just the five of them now. It was a slightly saddening feeling. One that Jeff chose to ignore, mostly because it was easier for all of them not just him, if they focused on other matters instead of the reason they didn't need to drag three tables together to seat everybody. Absent mindedly he eyed off the packs of sugar he wished Lita would allow him to add to his coffee. He pondered this illicit inclination with his fingers tapping against the table, unaware that with each tap of his nails, his fingers unconsciously moved closer to the forbidden sweetener.

But just because he didn't notice, didn't mean others didn't.

Shane Helms being one of them. With sharp eyes he was encouraging his friend to rebel from his girlfriend's oppressive regime in the only way he knew how. Silver tongued bastard. Largely influenced by Christian's manner of political expression, Shane therefore held very high hopes that he would succeed. In the unlikely event he would fail, he already was implementing the second part of his two tiered plan of attack. So in addition to finely crafted sentences of persuasion, he also undermined Lita's orders, by slowly pushing the jar of sugar closer and closer to his risk taking friend.

The third member of the group was slumbering.

This was a definite change from his usual behaviour; which mostly involved him suspiciously sneaking outside ever half an hour. Lightly snoring with his face squashed against the window, Rob Van Dam dreamed another Technicolor dream that Freud would have chomped at the bit to analyse. Rob sadly enough was currently without wheels, and . . . a driving license, and had to be driven by the said Canada and Anglophone-Francophone political activist to the guys' night. Apparently, the toil of being a passenger had exhausted the poor man. Every now and then, he'd softly bark and kick his left leg out, something which had forced his chauffer to leave the booth in search of safer ground.

The safer grounds included better mobile reception, which Christian was taking full advantage of.

At that very moment, he was speaking in loud, boastful tones to Torrie. The girl was not yet his girlfriend, but he had ambitious plans to alter her single status and have her converted to his legions of peeps. Her history of neat avoidance of all his previous attempts to woo her seemed to be changing, with a third 'official' date already being planned. Christian of course took this as a sign that he and the other blonde were meant to be, and had started to refer to Torrie and his number one peep.

This pet name did not please her, especially when that was all he now called her.

Yet the pet name did please one member of the motley friendship group.

Laughing at Christian and his number one peep was the fifth member of the table. Shannon Moore didn't seem to mind Rob's dog like reflexes, chortling as he watched the newest edition to the monthly meeting almost take out the grizzly waitress with one foul gesture as he yet again tried to physically illustrate to Torrie how perfect he was (not just for her, but in general). The fact she wasn't there in person to see this grand gesture was lost on Christian. The novelty of the blonde's behaviour still amused him. It amused all of them actually.

Christian was a novelty.

Mainly because the groups of five used to be a group of four.

Christian had recently returned to the group, heralded in by his coveted position of supremacy over Jeff and his desire to further annoy his brother. Edge, in Christian's eyes, had taken a championship that should have rightfully belonged to him. Ungrateful cretin. Even when they were younger Edge had always had the nasty habit of pinching everything that belonged to his younger brother. In his true fashion, Christian decided the only thing he could do about it was reclaim all the friends that his brother had once had. After minimal effort, the blonde had rip roaring success (in his eyes), and with great pride he once again took his self appointed role as leader and role model in the friendship group.

It didn't help that Shane did actually look up to him.

However, as Jeff succumbed to temptation, pouring more than half the jar of sugar into his coffee, that didn't really matter. Because it the third Saturday of the month, and they all knew what that meant. Jeff certainly knew what that meant, and so did Shane who was gleefully happy as his friend took a gulp of coffee flavoured sugar. With huge green eyes that glistened hungrily, Jeff watched with great anticipation as his meal was placed before him.

"Hell Jeff, you look like your about to get laid or something," Christian stated incredulously as he sat back down at the table.

"Yeah man, it's not healthy to look at a burger like that." Shane added immediately, copying the exact tone of voice the blonde Canadian used.

Jeff didn't answer, his eyes trained onto the meal that was larger than the other four men's meals combined. He was a simple man, Jeff decided, and he liked simple things. Things such as food like this. He sniggered manically to himself. There was no one here to stop him. No one. Picking it up, he almost inhaled the hamburger, breathing it in at if it was a lover. No one could stop him. Not a single soul that would dare -

"Jeff, no! You're not eating that." Announced a very familiar voice, then, his precious hamburger was torn out of his grasp. "Don't you know how bad that is for you?"

Jeff whimpered at the loss, and looked up into the narrow hazel eyes of his girlfriend.

"Yeah Jeff, it's not worth it." Torrie added, "You should just crunch on some ice instead. That's what Mariah Carey does."

With pitiful eyes, Jeff reached out for the burger with a hopeful look on his face, "But, Christian and I were in the gym all morning. Don't I deserve a treat?"

"Cholesterol is not a treat."

Slapping his hands away, Lita pushed the horrendously unhealthy meal away from him. Wrinkling her nose in displeasure as she did so; covered in grease and dripping oil, she fought ever half hearted advance Jeff masterminded. As she did, his eyes seemed to shimmer with grief and pain so much so that she almost gave in.

Torrie vindicated her friend's statement, "Lita's right."

Any pleasure Christian had with the unexpected arrival of his lady love was cut short as her sky blue eyes swung round to focus on him. With a desperate motion, he placed his arms around his dinner, trying to protect it. But of course, that failed.

"I don't think you should be eating like that either. It's not good for you." She told the other blonde, "I think you should be more sensible, especially with all those big matches coming up. You wouldn't want to do anything to jeopardize that."

Christian looked pained. Torn between agreeing to whatever she wanted and his meal, he was a deeply conflicted man. In his mind, Torrie was the most beautiful chick in the world but before him was the once a month indulgence. When else did he get to eat so much wonderful, wonderful food? He couldn't decide what to do. His mind became fuddled and Torrie began to react over to remove the plate from his grasp.

"Eep." Christian jumped, before instinctually shoving a handful of chips into his mouth.

Torrie wrinkled her nose in disappointment, "I hope you don't think I approve of your behaviour."

Christian struggled to find words, and fail as she defiantly looked away from him to focus on Shane. Appearing quite disconcerted by the presence of the two women, he glared accusingly at them. The normal placied look which Lita had come to expect from him was gone, and he fixed a reproachful stare on her and Torrie.

"Not to be rude or anything, but what are you doing here?" Shane asked coolly.

Not in the least intimidated, Lita meet his glare, "What do you think?"

"You can't be here."

"Why not?"

Shane didn't understand.

Shannon decided to take over, and in a very small non confrontational voice he told the women, "Normally – no offence or anything – but normally, it's just us,"

"And Torrie or I aren't allowed?" Lita filled in with her eyes mere slits of hazel as she examined the timid man before her.

"Exactly!" Shane exclaimed.

"I don't think that will work,"

Polishing her nails on her jeans, Lita looked like she was channeling Stephanie. Torrie gave off the same air, but maybe even more so as she was still giving Christian the silent treatment much to his utter overwhelming distress. Around them, the three men not dating the women in question glared meaningfully at Christian and Jeff, ordering them to take action. Well . . . actually, Rob was still slumbering and quietly growling like someone had stolen his favourite chew toy. However that wasn't the point.

But when Jeff and Christian didn't say a word in defense, the two women exchanged a serious look.

"Lita, I need to go to the bathroom."

In a code none of the men understood, the two women nodded, and gracefully shuffled away from the booth and towards the women's bathroom. But in their wake, peace only lasted so long. Rob might be sleeping and Shane might idolize Christian, but that didn't mean all was well. It was Shannon who broke ranks first. Sweet, kind, docile Shannon. For that, Christian had a good mind to ask him if he still had Matt's 'Mattattitude' flagpole still shoved up his backside.

With a puppy dog expression on his face, Shannon looked over and asked, "If you're not going to eat that, can I?"

Both Jeff and Christian looked shocked. One of their own had turned against them. Traitor. Yet . . . Christian let out a whine. His eyes darting from Torrie departing form to his meal. His mind was on overload, and the very moment the pretty blonde left his sight, he became territorial. Choosing to act the only way he knew how in order to protect his meal. He spat in the chips, and licked the burger.

Sometimes, Christian really could be the lowest common denominator.

However. . .

"Five second rule." Shannon announced, reaching over.

He was a country boy at heart. As long as nothing was crawling on his food he'd eat it. Besides, Matt had spat on everyone's lunches back in the day. Well, all except Lita's. No, back then Matt preferred to swap spit with her rather than launch it into her breakfast cereal for laughs.

"Noooo," Christian cried in an anguished tone, " Shannon!"

Shrugging, he was not fazed in the slightest, "Torrie's right. It's not good for you."

"It's not good for you either." Christian replied smartly.

"Hell, she's not my girlfriend, so it's not her problem."

This, strangely enough, perked the blonde Canadian right up. Leaning forward, he intensely examined the other man. Something about this worried not only Shannon, but all of the others (bar the slumbering Van Dam), and they backed away from him a little.

With a curious look on his face, Christian asked, "Do you really think she's my girlfriend now? Really?"

Shannon's eyes darted nervously from Jeff to Christian, "Uhm . . . Yes?"

Christian let out a joyous yelp, "Thank God!"

Shannon let out the breath he was holding; and then reached out to grab some of the blonde's chips.

But then Christian seemed anxious, "Oh, God, I'm going to mess this up, aren't I?"

"What? No." Jeff answered quickly.

A little bit too quickly for the self proclaimed future Hall of Famer.

"Oh God, I have messed it up! I should have listened to her! I bet that's why she and Lita have gone to the ladies room. Torrie's going to break up with me."

Shannon abandoned the chips, and gulped nervously; obviously unequipped for handling the needy blonde, and then he did what came naturally to him. He kicked the sleeping wrestler, creating a rather effective diversion. Rob was not a person who when woken up suddenly took kindly to such interruption of his personal time. Letting out a loud barking roar, he flailed his arms, whacking everyone sitting too close to him.

"Shit, can't a man get some personal time!" Rob roared, although it was more like a wail for the slumber he was dragged out of . . . much like the wail a child lets out after being dragged from their mother's womb.

Meanwhile, behind the closed doors of the Ladies' room, Torrie hummed as she reapplied her newest favourite perfume. It was French, and Christian had gotten it for her. Both of these facts Lita had heard many, many times. She'd also been the recipient of too many second hand bunches of brash looking wildflowers that the blonde Canadian had been sending Torrie every night before Raw started.

It seemed as though Torrie was getting a little protective of her Petite Chien.

And Torrie wasn't talking about her little fluffy moving carpet, otherwise known as her dog Chloe.

Candace Michelle was getting a little above herself in Torrie's mind, and in the past whenever a woman got to smug, Torrie always found herself without a date. Or with one, if Torrie was the one acting smug. But that wasn't the point. No. This point was, it wasn't going to happen this time. No sir. The little 'Go Daddy' tart could dance around in circles of all Torrie cared, but the raven haired playboy model was not going to get her claws into Christian.

Not that Torrie cared either way.

She and Christian weren't even officially dating. There wasn't even a 'she and Christian'. He could do what he wanted. He was a free agent, just like she was. But, Torrie felt honor bound to stop Candace, after all, Christian had a reputation to protect. He had no idea what he was dealing with when it can to Candace. A woman like that could easily take advantage of him, and Torrie would truly hate to see that happen. She was acting in his best interests after all.

Or that was at least what Lita got told when Torrie shoved the newest bouquet into her hands.

Oh, and got ordered not to say a single word about Christian to anyone.

Lita tried not to focus too much on it. After one instance of accidentally reading the card Christian had penned, the redhead rather preferred to stay in the dark. It was Torrie's business if she was Captain Charisma's number one peep, not Lita's, and Lita wanted it to stay that way. Badly.

"Do you want some?" Torrie generously offered, holding out the pink and purple bottle, "It's from Paris. Christian said that girl in 'Amelie' wears it too."

Lita politely declined, she rather thought Jeff would dislike having her smell exactly like Christian's number one peep. She rather thought she'd dislike it too. Knowing her luck Christian would notice and make some egocentrically comment about it. He also probably make his comment while he had his nose pressed up against her neck or something as unpleasant as that. Sitting up on the sink, she watched Torrie flutter around preening herself. She was in red today, and she commanded attention in a way no one else could.

"I'm glad you told Jeff off. He and Christian can be bad influences on each other when we aren't around."

Blinking, Lita raised her brow, "I'm not sure I understand."

Rolling her eyes, Torrie looked nonplussed, "They need us to keep an eye on them. Silly boys."

"That wasn't what I was doing." Lita persisted, "I was just doing what Stephanie said."

Torrie didn't look convinced, "Yeah right."

"Listen, maybe we should just go. How about a film or something? I know you wanted to go see that French thing,"

Though Torrie's eyes lit up at the thought of a willing victim, she didn't seem as enthused as Lita expected, "We can't though. We told the guys that we'd be going with them tonight instead."

Striding away from the mirrors after one last flip of her hair, Torrie gleamed prettily at Lita. Ignoring the fact Lita wanted to uncrash the boys' night they'd irrupted, Torrie seemed unconcerned that they were treading on sacred ground. Opening the door a little, she seemed fully prepared to reenter the dinner, but then she halted. Craning her ear, she bit her lip and beckoned for her redheaded friend to come closer.

Like two Nancy Drew's with better outfits, they listened to the loud voices coming from their table.

"What the hell are you doing with her Jeff? Are you out of your mind?" Shane spat, "She ruined Matt and Edge's friendships, not to mention their careers!"

"Hey! Don't talk that way about Lita." Christian declared venomously.

Yet this only made Rob laugh, "Why should we listen to the guy dating a total ditz? Torrie's got you by the balls Dude."

"If you know what's good for you bro, you'll shut your mouth." The blonde threatened with rarely seen rancor in his voice.

"Maybe you should have told Jeff that before Lita got to him." Shane swore, "It's bro's before ho's, man, not the other way round."

This set Jeff off, and in a deathly quiet voice he spoke, "Don't ever call Lita that ever again."

Shane didn't listen, "What are you thinking Jeff? Matt's your brother, and Edge was your best friend. Lita's nothing more than a nice piece of –"

Before Shane could continue, Jeff interrupted him, "Lita was always my best friend. Edge never was, and if you remember Shane, you could say the same thing. Remember how she'd always remember your birthday, and how she'd always stop Matt and Edge from eating you alive so you could have a nice day? What about when she called the ambulance after you had the fall during training, even after you had everyone else convinced you were fine?"

Shane didn't say a word.

But Jeff did.

"It turned out you'd fractured your collar bone."

It appeared as if Rob went to speak, because Jeff continued sharply, "Don't say a word Rob. You always adored Li, and we all know it."

"I wasn't going to man." Rob apologized, "I'm sorry."

"Yeah," Shane muttered, "I didn't think."

"It's okay." Jeff conceded, accepting the two apologies of his friends.

However, Christian wasn't so graceful, "Rob, I think you have something you need to say."

Heavy breathing was the only thing Lita and Torrie could hear from where they were, but on baited breath, they waited for the man to answer. Torrie especially so, as she had only recently allowed Rob to take her to the Medical Emergency Room after being attacked by the two raven haired women she'd once been leader of.

Finally, Rob spoke, "I'm sorry about what I said about Torrie. I didn't mean it. She's a complete sweetheart, you know that."

"I do." Christian's said in a leveled voice, obviously aware of his friend's short stint dating his number one peep. "That's why she and Lita are more than welcomed tonight."

"That's fine, totally fine," Shannon broke in, trying to calm the situation, "Absolutely fine."

Lita could pick up a little annoyance in Jeff's voice as he spoke again, "Lita should always been invited."

Slowly, silence fell over the five. But as soon as that happened, tentative chatter reappeared, as Rob and Shane began to speak. Their combined efforts, with the additional help of Shannon soon calmed the table, and within moments they resumed their earlier discussions speaking without any of the anger or frustration that had accompanied their disagreement.

Turning to Torrie, Lita didn't know quite what to say. Torrie on the other had had a soft pink glow to her face, and a half smile on her face. Although she'd been shaken by the comments from Shane and Rob, having Christian defend her name was a nice change. Actually, it was more than nice, and she didn't think she'd mind so much now if he called her any of his pet names. Lita looked down at her hands, and then back up at her friend, with the same expression on her face.

It had been such a long time since anyone had defended her.

Although both she and Torrie had more than survived without the need for someone to protect their honor, it was pleasant. It was made Torrie glow, and it made Lita smile. Though that smile turned into a badly hidden gag when she walked back over to the booth and accidentally overheard Christian in the middle of another long speech about how wonderful Torrie was.

"She's got a tongue like an electric eel," he stated dreamily.

"Why thank you," Torrie blinked, somehow managing to sound graceful as she accepted his complement.

Christian blinked too, realised that his 'number one peep' had over heard him. Then he looked over to what had been his plate of food. It didn't exactly look just like it had before the pretty blonde had gone off to the Ladies room. Shannon realised this too, and smiled nervously. But that failed, and Christian never took mercy on his adversaries, especially not when Torrie was around.

Accusingly, he pointed at his meek looking friend, " Shannon did it. Not me, I promise."

"Oh, don't worry about that, I believe you."

No longer ignoring the Canadian look of uncertain surprise, Torrie played with his hair, rearranging it in the manner she found most pleasing. Christian although astonished by this reprieve was not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, and quickly nestled closer to her allowing her to do whatever she like with his short blonde locks. This, of course pleased Torrie, and of course, got her thinking about setting up an appointment with her hair stylist to make sure he actually got a hair cut that suited him instead of the look he was currently sporting.

"I didn't touch mine either," Jeff claimed, "That was Shannon. Not me."

Rolling her eyes, Lita slip what was left of his meal back over to him.

"Really?" Jeff asked dubiously.

"Yes, really."

A pleased look spread over his face, and he quickly kissed her cheek. Blushing a little, she grinned and almost managed not to gag as he eat what was left of his meal like a duck, practically swallowing his burger whole.

After they finished their dinner, they left in a group of seven instead of five. Jeff almost believed that no one was missing. He almost believed, as Christian almost believed, that they had always been a group of this seven, instead of the original twelve. And as he held Lita's hand, he didn't miss a single person that was absent, and he didn't mind a thing because when Lita was smiling at him ever so brightly nothing else seemed to matter at all.

"Come on ladies, you're in for a real treat tonight." Shannon announced as they piled into their cars; excited he danced on his feet, "The nights still young,"

Glancing over at Torrie the pretty blonde shared Lita's confused look as the five men drove them off to a secluded house in the middle of the woods, and unpacked five large suitcases. Like teenagers the five men argued about something neither of the women understood, before they turned, and set their eyes on the two.

Slowly, Rob stepped forward, "You're going to have to trust us."

Then the guys/girls night really began.


Much later on, Lita yawned.

Jeff patted her shoulders, "We'll be home soon,"

It was almost four in the morning when the night finally ended with a rendition of one of ACDC's many hits. Lita doubted she'd ever forget the sight of Rob Van Dam belting out 'It's a long way to the top, if you wanna rock and roll' in full kit, while playing air guitar. She also doubted that she'd ever forget the sight of Torrie dressed to the nines as the lead singer of Blondie, and the sight of Christian pouting because the guys had made him give up his long puffy blonde wig to the girl that was now his girlfriend.

Yes, 'his' girlfriend.

He's finally gotten the courage to ask. Although, when he did ask, it was in such an arrogant manner that it was a surprise to all that Torrie had agreed. Yet she had, and oh how Christian had gloated. Asshole. Lita yawned again. She was so exhausted. Blearily, she looked out of the window as the car slowed down, the tires crunching on the gravel driveway.

"This isn't home . . ." she muttered confused.

Rolling his shoulders, Jeff brushed a kiss onto her temple, "I'm just stopping to get some of my things. It'll only take a minute."

Glancing at her glowing watch, Lita blinked, "It's so late – or early. Why don't we just stay here tonight? Then you wouldn't have to drive."

Jeff looked a touch unsure, but when she opened her car door and stumbled out, any hesitation faded. It didn't take long for them to crash in Jeff's room. His home was small, tiny. It only really fitted one person and that was only when it wasn't at full capacity, crammed with weird little knickknacks that only a person like Jeff could collect. But since he was half asleep and she was even more so, it didn't matter.

It was late in the afternoon when they woke.

He woke first. Crawling out of bed, he halted when she reached out to grasp his arm. With a gleefully smile on his face, he obediently allowed her to pull him back under the covers. He also obediently undressed when she asked, and very obediently kissed her the very moment she let him.

"Good morning sweetheart."

"I like waking up to you in the morning." She told him.

He grinned; he quite liked it too.

With his ego sufficiently boosted, she had kept kissing him, and he had held her tight. His touch was soft and idle, and she felt as if she was of harm's way, warm, and alive. He kept her close, never once pulling away while smiling the whole time. Running her fingers along his spine, she couldn't help feeling protected, and feeling safe. Such simple pleasures . . . she hadn't even realized she'd lost them until he gave them back to her with soft words. True words.

For some reason everything about it all felt like this was what 'normal' should be.

Green eyes didn't lie.

Instead of tell him no, or giving him an excuse, she clung to him, and told him strange truths she didn't know were still true. Her body moved with eloquence she didn't know she possessed, and he responded in a way only he could. Taking his time, he languidly made love to her the only way he could, and she answered his actions with her own that made him wish for 'what if's'.

He felt that that was how 'normal' should be too.

An hour later, tired and satisfied, Jeff padded sleepily out into towards the kitchen to get something for them to eat. Absentmindedly, he hummed a little, tap dancing as he moved. Behind him, Lita wrapped her arms around his shoulders, and tried to keep up with his flashy dance steps. He laughed and she nipped his shoulder playfully.

Finishing with a spin, he dipped her, kissing her deeply.

It was during that lengthy moment; the sound of his front door unlocking was forgotten.

And so was the creak of the door opening.

"Erhm." Someone coughed.

Like a deer caught in the headlights, a very nude Jeff swung his eyes to the open door where not only his brother and his brother's new girlfriend stood shocked, but his father. He let out a whimper and jumped, pushing Lita behind his back. Then looking down and realizing the lack of clothing, he let out another whimper, and grabbed Lita and pushed her in front of him.

In front of him, in his boxers and shirt, Lita waved a little at the rest of the Hardy clan.

Then he realised that they were looking at her, Lita. The very woman his father new referred to as the 'red headed temptress sent by the devil himself to torture his first born son', and the very woman his brother still used posters of for target practice. With these thoughts rushing around his head, Jeff grabbed her, and pushed her behind him. Then, back in the original position, he when deathly pale for a shocked second, and then clapped his hands on a pillow, awkwardly covering himself up the best he could.

Blushing profusely, he somehow managed to asked nonchalantly, "Uhm, what are you all doing here?"

"We organized to take Dad out to lunch." Matt replied, blinking dumbly at the sight before him.

"Oh, I sort of forgot." Jeff replied, now trying to appear relaxed by leaning on the arm of his couch. "Sorry about that Dad."

"That's alright." His father replied, uncomfortably, "No harm done."

It was Ashley, in her usual tactless manner who tactlessly asked, "What the hell are you doing Jeff?"

"Errr…" Jeff tries to think of a plausible excuse.

Of course, he couldn't find any, so he did the next best thing.

He bolted.

Still standing, Lita bit her lip and did the only thing she could; she made small talk.

"Would you like a cup of tea perchance?"


Tea, had of course, been very awkward.

Jeff was nowhere to be found, and she had bit marks all over her neck and shoulder.

But they had left eventually; the key word was 'eventually'.

Afterwards Lita searched through her boyfriend's tiny home for him. Hide and seek. God, with his slightly left of center tendencies, Jeff was on the verge of impossible to locate. Added to that was the overwhelming piles of stuff Jeff had collected over the years. All of which resulted in a maze like home she was unqualified to handle. It was like wading through a jungle of plastic plants and wind up toys. It wasn't until she searched through half the house; she opened the door of his linen closet that she found him.

With his face in his hands he refused to look at her.

"It could have been worse."

The rationally in her tone of voice was missed by Jeff as he let out a nervous laugh, "How? How could it have been worse than my father, my brother, and his girlfriend walking in on us making out and seeing me naked?"

Patting his shoulder, Lita squished up into the closer so they were sitting side by side, "Well, they could have come an hour earlier and caught us making love."

He let out a barking sound, almost crying, "But we would have been in my room, covered by sheets and blankets, and with the door shut. We wouldn't have been in the living room groping each other, with you in my clothes, and me out of them."

"If I recall correctly, you were trying to get me out of those clothes too."

"That's not the point Li!" he whaled.

Despite it all, she had to smile. Even most awkward afternoon tea couldn't dampen the grin on her face. Something about her boyfriend wrapped in Spiderman sheets set offset all the embarrassment she had suffered sitting in Jeff's kitchen discussing the weather with his family and Ashley. Resting her chin on his shoulder, she bit her lip and tugged a little on his outfit.

"By the way, that's a wicked toga."

He only groaned.

"Cheer up Charlie,"

He groaned again, "I don't see why you're so happy."

"I'm not, I had to deal with them all after you bolted."

Lowering his hands, he finally looked at her. A little bit of guilt filled his eyes and he couldn't meet her wide hazel ones. Fiddling with said toga, he nervously pulled at the soft fabric twisting it around his fingers before tenderly replacing the fabric with a lock of her blood red hair.

"Sorry about leaving you to the wolves."

"It's alright. I was fine."

And she had been. She hadn't apologized, and she hadn't let them walk all over her. Yet she had managed to be polite and courteous. It was almost strange looking back on her behavior. She had forgotten how strong she could be when she needed to be. She hadn't needed anyone to back her up, and even though she would have appreciated Jeff taking some of his families flack instead of her, Lita had managed.

Actually, she did more than manage.

She had been perfectly alright.

And the only reason it felt strange she realised, was because it had been so long since she'd been independent.


So what'd you think? I hope you enjoyed this chapter; I had fun writting all the guys and making them so pathetic and deluded, yetstill good guys that are loveable likeover grown puppydogs.