Thank you, everyone, for reviewing and making my life worth living. I have a new purpose now, even if I do procrastinate like hell. You'll have to excuse me on that part.

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Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. I just use the characters for my own twisted pleasure. :aims and shoots gun at Naruto's feet: "Dance little man! Dance for me!"


The next morning at 6 am, Ino and Shikamaru were awakened by the sound of insistent knocking at the door. Shikamaru growled and climbed out of bed; Ino muttered curses and struggled up from the couch. They both stumbled to the door, Ino first. Shikamaru just yawned and shrugged, not thinking clearly.

The blonde girl opened the door, only to have a bright flash go off in both their faces. They blinked simultaneously, and were still shaking off the bright spots in their vision, when another few went off.

The photographer took off down the stairs, leaving the stairway door to the penthouse slamming. The lock was broken. (Penthouses have escalators that need keys to activate, but in case of emergencies, the stairways still lead to the room. They are always locked, but the photographer had broken it.)

Ino swore in 7 different languages, rushing to the door and opening it; but it was no use; the man had gotten away.

"SHIT! MERDE! MIERDA! MERDA! SCHEIBE! RIEN! MALDICION! FLUCH!" She swore as she hopped up and down and did a little dance of apocalyptic fury. Shikamaru swore too, quietly, under his breath. Someone must have recognized her, followed her here, and now they were both in deep, deep, shit. He groaned as he banged his head against the wall. Ino was still fuming; her eyes filled with dark promises of pain to the photographer, swearing to herself that she will beat the fear of god and Yamanaka into him.

"Was that paparazzi?" He asked at last, when she'd finished cursing.

"I don't know. It might be…" She suddenly sounded very afraid. "I- I can't stay here, Shikamaru! It's not safe anymore. If my father sent that guy, you'd disappear in a week! If it's by a rival company, they'll blame you for the kidnapping! If it's the media- they'll tear you to shreds! You won't get a moment's rest! The picture! Me, in my pajamas, and you, half-naked! Ohmygodohmygod!"

Her anguished wailing echoed off the staircase walls, and she started hyperventilating, and the tears were already in her eyes, but she didn't cry.

He sighed and slapped her gently, jolting her out of hysteria.

"It's ok, Ino. It's fine; you don't have to go. If you do, they'll catch you eventually, and they'd probably have to drag you back kicking and screaming. But if you stay, you can meet them head on with dignity." He reasoned, hoping she wouldn't realize that it wasn't the solution to their problem. He'd worry about it later.

She bit her lip, worrying it with her teeth. "But…"

"No buts; I have a few connections, so I might be able to stop the photos from being published."

She hugged him, "Thank you, Shika! You're so nice to me…" She told his chest. Then she leaned up on her tiptoes, and kissed him twice on the cheek. She dried her eyes with the corner of her shirt, and ran back to the room to get dressed.

He stood there; still a bit dazed by the kisses she'd pressed into his cheek. He touched it slightly; one foggy part of mind noting that she'd called him "Shika." And he found that he didn't mind it at all.


When Shikamaru left for work two hours later, Ino promised him that she wouldn't go anywhere. She'd simply stay home and watch television.

Outside of his office, Shikamaru braced himself, then opened the door. Loud cheers greeted them, and Tsunade, his boss with a gambling problem, stood in the middle of the crowd with a smirk on her pretty face. The man with the insanely high IQ groaned with exasperation.

"Someone just scored!" A lackey yelled.

"Got laid last night, Nara?" Another crowed.

"What's her phone number? Is she free?"

Shikamaru bristled at that. "Just because a girl answered my phone does not mean we fucked!" The room fell silent at his snarl. Then everyone started whispering; Shikamaru had never, in the whole 5 years that they've known him, used that kind of tone before. He was laid back, he was normally passive, he wouldn't even bat an eyelash if someone were to stab him in the back with a letter opener!

People eventually dispersed, unnerved by his glare. Tsunade was the only one that remained there, her eyebrows arched in question. Shikamaru ignored her, and slouched off to his office, another tedious day of positioning armies and people just to fight a war that was never going to end.

During the day he made phone calls and typed e-mails to his 'connections' to see if any one of them had photos sent to them. They all replied that they haven't, and Shikamaru was getting frustrated.

Tsunade came in during lunchtime, holding two lunch boxes with one hand and utensils in the other. Chouji, his plump best friend who was the expert in tank weaponry, trailed after her, two large portions of lunch in his hand, all for himself.

"Shikamaru! Lunch's ready!" She cried as she closed the door with her heel. Said person slept on, oblivious. A blonde eyebrow ticked, a vein pulsed and she punched him awake. Chouji didn't even flinch or look up as he sat down to tuck into his lunch. Food came first, as even talking (and sometimes breathing) was second.

"Oww…"Shikamaru complained, just for the sake of it, not because it actually hurt.

"Everyday that I come in here to give you your lunch, and I catch you sleeping on the job? I don't pay you to sleep, Nara!" She yelled at him in a friendly way. It was almost tradition; lunch wouldn't feel right if she didn't have to punch him awake and then shout at him.

He shook his head when she offered lunch to him; instead, he reached into his briefcase and took out a neatly wrapped, brand new bento box. Tsunade and Chouji raised both eyebrows; this was a new one, Shikamaru actually bothering to make his own lunches? Then Tsunade was struck with fear; was Armageddon already upon them?

"The person staying at my house temporarily, made it." Shikamaru explained, interpreting her expressions well. "Don't get any funny ideas, Tsunade. I only met her yesterday. She was… lost, and I decided to help her. So don't gossip." He warned, when she began to smirk knowingly. "And you, don't think I don't know that you've been plotting too." Chouji tried to look innocent, but he couldn't keep his face straight. Then both him and Tsunade burst out laughing.

"Oh, damn, I think I'm bleeding internally from laughing too hard." Chouji wheezed.

"I think I broke a rib..." The older woman snorted.

Shikamaru rolled his eyes and opened the lunch box. Then he blinked, and blinked again; inside the box, rice was packed tightly into the largest square with a pickled plum on top, then rows of tiny smoked mackerel in another square, then finally some cold salted kelp in the last square.

Tsunade peered over and then had to hide her snicker and grin by pretending to cough. So, the girl that he picked up only yesterday, staying at his house temporarily, somehow knew his favorite food? Shikamaru looked over the bento to glare at her; but she didn't stop laughing, it was hilarious to watch Shikamaru looking silly with embarrassment. He looked away, a pink blush staining his heated cheeks. She continued to snigger, and Chouji was grinning like he just won the lottery for food. Their eyes met and they shared the same thought: this girl is going to have Shikamaru more whipped than his old man.

Shikamaru sighed. I try to live each day quietly, I extend a hand of help to a maiden in distress, and suddenly my world goes upside down? No good deed goes unpunished, I suppose. He thought wearily as he began to eat the lunch that Ino had slipped into his briefcase when he wasn't looking. The fact that it tasted absolutely delicious did not help his mood. He'd just found out about it that morning, but he hadn't bothered to open it. How Ino actually did find out about his favorite food was puzzling, but he dropped it; he'd ask her later.

Later that day, men were smirking at him; women simply smiled sappily. Shikamaru wished he could just curl up into a ball and sleep. Or die, he didn't really care either way.


"I'm home," he called out as he slammed the door behind him. When no one answered, he looked around the rooms, only to find Ino sprawled out over his bed. Shikamaru frowned slightly at the sight she presented, What the? He stepped closer, and saw that her head was tilted to the side, drooling on the covers. The Egyptian cotton hunter green blankets had apparently been kicked off at one point in her napping. A sweat drop hung on his head.

"Troublesome, bothersome woman…" He muttered as he picked her limp form up, and carefully carried her over to the couch, where he deposited her body into the softness and tucked her in. Shoulders slumped; he walked off into the bathroom to change and shower. Ino turned around and yawned, giggled and muttered "Hmm, pudding… Shika! Hehe…"


"How did you know my favorite foods were mackerel and kelp?" He asked around dinnertime that night. Ino looked up from her pasta eating, wiped her already clean mouth and smiled at him.

"Well, it's not hard to figure out when the pantry is full of them." He nodded in resignation; he should have known.

"Thanks for the bento today… it was… delicious." He thanked the salt shaker, too embarrassed to look at her properly.

Ino giggled, the sight of Shikamaru desperately trying to look into her eyes but failing to do so making her feel good that she'd gone to the trouble of making him one. She used to make bento for her dad as well. Actually, he refused to eat any lunch unless his daughter made it.

Her face fell slightly when she thought of her father again. Shikamaru noted this, but didn't say anything. They finished the rest of their dinner in companionable silence.

Shikamaru lay in bed, listening to the snores coming from the female in the other room. He scowled when he remembered the photographer from before. Tomorrow would be very chaotic, to say the least.

That was the understatement of the year.


What a short chapter. Promise I'll do a better job next time! Ehehe... Care to review and make me happy? I know I tend to use a lot of breaks. Hopefully they'll ease up in the next few chapters.

Cheers!
Earthborne