RM: After re-uniting with my inner comedian, I have decided to finish my story... I'm taking requests right now for one-shots. So if you have a TV show or video game or anime or ANYTHING that you think I could make a half-decent story out of, send them in NOW. OR FOREVER BE SILENT.
Part 1: The Villain
In a world where Tom Cruise worships an alien, and the Numa-Numa dance is the most popular thing since the Moonwalk, one thing stands above the insanity…
DANCE DANCE REVOLUTION
"Now, whether you're living in the days of mullets and trailer trash actresses getting pregnant, (2006), or a morbidly obese zombie who watches Desperate House Wives all day and eats Chocolate Pudding with drunken old people (2006), then maybe, just maybe, you're a loser. BUT Dance Dance Revolution will make you look like a loser around other people. Probably LAUGHING AT YOU. But isn't laughter the best medicine? Order Dance Dance Revolution today, you DUMBASS LOSER!"
The yellow L-Shape block turned off his Tivo and went to school. Only to discover that he was in a completely different town over-run by zombies! Oh, and U2 was playing there. And they were filming a movie or something. Anyways… THE TOWN WAS COMPLETELY DESERTED AND INFESTED WITH MAN-EATING ZOMBIES!
Then, suddenly, a man appeared out of the shadows.
"Hello, Mr. 2D. Do you mind if I call you that? I've always wanted to call someone that."
"Oh my god. Are you Urkle?"
"I was Urkle. Now I'm… Jose Asscrack."
"Bad end of a green card?"
"Yeah. Hey, how come the main characters of this story are boring and talk much.
RM: Cuz'it's my style! Now shut up Urkle, and say you're line!
"Fine. HAIL SATAN!"
"Oh my gosh. I think he might be a BUDDHIST!"
End Of Part 1
Part 2: U2?
RM: Now I could tell a complicated background story here, but I'll just say that the main character HAPPENS to be a U2 fan. ON WITH THE PLOT!
"McDonald's McFlurrys."
"Hey girl, can I have a large McFlurry?"
"All the boys come to the yard to drink my milkshake. Damn right, it's better than yours, damn right, it's better than yours!"
"Our milkshakes use REAL black chocolate, unlike those trailer-trash restaurants like Burger King and Arby's."
McDonalds. I'm lovin' it.
"So how am I gettin' in to this concert. It may be the only way I can… Whoa! It's Oscar Myer Weiner Mobile! Wow! Hmmm… I know! I'll sing my Oscar Myer jingle! Oh, I wish I had an Oscar Myer Weiner! Then all the girls would be on top of me!"
Two KanYe West careers later…
"I can't believe that I got kicked out! Now there's only one thing left to do: I'll have to make a band and beat Urkle in Battle Of the Bands!"
End Of Part Two
Part Three: Battle Of the Bands
"Baby, girl, I want to get you a special ring. So… I'm going to let you pick it out."
"Oh, Lance!"
One and A Half Friends Seasons Later…
"I didn't mean a dick piercing!"
"Oh, but Lance, it matches!"
"Every #$ begins with Kay."
"Hello, I'm Urkle. I'm going to sing a little song I made called "Butterflys!"
NO RESPONSE
"Well, fck you, too! Thank you."
"Hello. I'm the yellow L-Shaped blocks. I got together with my good friends in Slayer, and I uh… We're just gonna improvise."
"#$$$$$$$$$$$#$$$#$#&&(SHIT)&$#$#$$$#$#$$!"
"Thank you."
"And the winner is Tetris!"
"I'll be back. Mr. 2D."
"We'll see, Urkle. We'll see."
And then the yellow L-Shaped block became 3-D, moved to the Playboy Mansion, and totally got laid. In other words:
He lived happily ever after.
The End
RM: If anyone's wondering: Yes, I'm white, and yes, I'm a dumbass. Thanks for reading. And, um… Yeah.
