Chapter 298: Adam's Song
Monday, January 30th, Evening
(Song Lyrics in italics)
There's only one possible way for Ashlyn to know about her troubles with Shea, Izzy reflected.
Not that they were all her fault, Izzy reminded herself. Shea did insist that she'd dance with Keith, which for her and Keith is always a dangerous move, Izzy remembered. She nodded, looking right at Ashlyn. "Angela told you," she said.
Ashlyn shook her head. "Actually, Peyton told the both of us when we were Skyping. I had a few questions about the condo," Ashlyn said.
"Well, there you go; Izzy's not that pure after all," Trin said, enjoying every moment of the discomfort Trin preserved Izzy felt.
"Never claimed to be," Izzy said, "Y'all made up that Virgin Izzy shit."
"Well, that's the image you projected," Trin said.
Izzy looked at Ivy. The woman from Chicago was thinking something and trying to hide it. She wasn't hiding the thoughts well, though. Izzy nodded. "What's on your mind, Ivy?" Izzy asked.
"Adam," Ivy said softly.
"Adam?" Ashlyn asked like she wasn't sure what Ivy said.
"My son?" Izzy asked, wondering where this was going.
Ivy nodded, "Yeah," she said, "You've brought him up several times, but you never talk much detail about him."
Izzy nodded and grabbed her beer glass tightly. "You want to know about Adam," she said.
"I would," Ivy said, still in a soft voice.
"Oh boy!" Trin said.
Izzy sighed and looked across the table at Ashlyn. "Okay," she said, and listened to the song on the juke box.
I never thought I'd die alone
I laughed the loudest who'd have known?
I trace the cord back to the wall
No wonder it was never plugged in at all
I took my time, I hurried up
The choice was mine I didn't think enough
I'm too depressed to go on
You'll be sorry when I'm gone
"Izzy, you don't have to do this," Ashlyn said.
"Yes, I do," Izzy said.
"Iz, please beg out; I know it hurts," Trin said.
"No, I need to pull the bandage off, so to speak," Izzy said.
"Izzy?" Ivy asked.
Izzy picked up her glass and slammed down the rest of the beer in the glass. After she swallowed the amber liquid, she looked at Ivy. "Adam was a junior semi-formal baby. After the school year, I went to Europe with Chase; we were backpacking across the continent. When we got to Paris, I wasn't feeling well. Chase took me to the doctor, and they confirmed what we suspected, I was pregnant. The first thing I did was call Keith at the basketball camp he was attending," Izzy said.
"How did Keith take it?" Ivy asked.
Trin laughed. "The Titanic took the iceberg better," she said.
"Trin!" Ashlyn said.
Izzy shot dagger eyes at Trin and turned back to Ivy. "As you could see, he didn't take it well. In fact, all Keith said, Oh! That's all he said, Oh! You've just been told you're going to be a dad, and all you can say is Oh! Well, Chase and I cut our trip short and flew back home. My mom was, well, to say the least, not happy. It didn't help that Keith's mom is my mom's best friend," Izzy said.
I never conquered, rarely came
Sixteen just held such better days
Days when I still felt alive
We couldn't wait to get outside
The world was wide, too late to try
The tour was over, we'd survived
I couldn't wait 'til I got home
To pass the time in my room alone
"Isn't that every best friend's dream that their kids get together?" Ivy asked.
"I don't think in this way," Izzy said.
"Exactly, Isabella Peyton," Trin said.
"Isabella Peyton?" Ivy asked.
"Yes, that's my name. I happened to be named after Keith's mom," Izzy said, "Talk about wanting best friend's to have kids get together; I was double cursed there."
"I don't think that's a curse," Ivy said.
"You don't know the town as well as we do," Trin said.
"Things went over bad and got worse. When Keith came home, things were rough as he closed himself off to everyone. My mom wasn't happy with me. I was also the head of the cheer squad that year too. The one saving grace is Lucas, who had part of the Carriage House to an apartment for Keith, me, and our child," Izzy said.
"Are those the apartments Kay mentioned?" Ivy asked.
"Yes, but there are several," Trin said.
"The largest one was converted for Keith and me," Izzy said, "Eventually, it came time, and Adam was born. It was a hard delivery, about seventeen hours; I had a small bundle of joy—a boy with beautiful blue eyes and a tuff of brown hair. I named him Adam after my last name and Kelly after Keith and my friend Kelly. He had Keith's last name. As I held him close to my breast for the first time, I cried."
"Awe!" Ivy said.
"Adam was a sickly baby, and I didn't get much sleep, but it was all worth it. I was also sitting on several acceptance letters. Keith signed to play at UNC, and there's pressure for me to go with him and keep the family together. I spent time after school helping to pick out paint and furniture for an apartment; I wasn't even eighteen," Izzy said, took a look at the pitcher, picked it up, and topped off her glass. She took a sip of the beer.
"You don't have to go on, Iz," Trin said.
"Izzy, breath, you don't have to do this," Ashlyn said.
"Once you start a story, you must finish it," Izzy said.
"No, you don't, Izzy," Ashlyn said.
"Iz, don't be stubborn," Trin said.
Izzy put her beer glass down. She looked at Ivy. "The date was set for Adam and me to move into the Carriage House. I packed my stuff and looked around my room at Beaulieu. Adam was crying, and he was a bit sick. I fed him, and he drifted off to sleep. I left a monitor and went down to talk to my mom. Not even an hour later, I returned to check on Adam, and he wasn't breathing," Izzy said.
"Oh my!" Ivy said.
"I called 911 and my mom. I started to do CPR on my son. I was freaking out, my mom is freaking out, and it's a mess. The fire department showed up and took over. I stood in the corner being held by my mom, crying my ass off hysterically. The ambulance showed up, and they took Adam and me to the hospital. My mom followed in her car. We got to the hospital and right into the ER," Izzy said, grabbed her beer glass, and she lowered her head.
"Izzy, don't do this," Ashlyn said.
"Iz, stop this," Trin said.
"The doctor came out and told me that Adam had passed. I broke down, and they checked on me. They had to perform an autopsy. My mom drove me home; I was crying, a total wreck. Keith showed up later, ready to help move us in. I was destroyed, and my mom told him what happened. Keith froze, and after a moment, he left," Izzy said.
I never thought I'd die alone
Another six months I'll be unknown
Give all my things to all my friends
You'll never step foot in my room again
You'll close it off, board it up
Remember the time that I spilled the cup
Of apple juice in the hall
Please tell mom this is not her fault
"Izzy, please don't torture yourself," Ashlyn said.
"Not long after Adam's death Keith and I went to prom together. For a special night, it was awkward and uncomfortable. When I got home that night, I decided to go to Yale. By Christmas, Keith and I were done," Izzy said and looked up and saw the look on Ivy's face. Ivy had turned pale with the shock of the story.
I never conquered, when you came
Sixteen just held such better days
Days when I still felt alive
We couldn't wait to get outside
The world was wide, too late to try
The tour was over, we'd survived
I couldn't wait 'til I got home
To pass the time in my room alone
"Izzy, stop," Trin said.
"How was Adam, you asked? Adam was a small sweet sickly three-month-old boy who cooed when I held him close to my heart. He came into my life unexpectedly and left way too early," Izzy said.
Izzy looked at Trin, and she saw her sister pale in horror. Good, you wanted this to be a horror show; there you go, Izzy thought. All your issues with Brian being a scumbag and your temper tantrum that sent you to New York, ain't shit, Izzy reflected.
"Izzy, why do you torture yourself?" Ashlyn asked.
Izzy just held a hand up and shook her head.
"Izzy, please say something," Ashlyn said.
Izzy took in a deep breath, held it then let it go. "As painful it is to tell that story, in some ways, it's therapeutic," Izzy said.
I never conquered, rarely came
Tomorrow holds such better days
Days when I can still feel alive
Well I can't wait to get outside
The world is wide, the time goes by
The tour is over, I'll survive
I can't wait 'til I get home
To pass the time in my room alone
"Are you sure?" Ashlyn asked.
Izzy nodded, took her napkin, and dried the corner of her eyes. "Yes," she said.
Ashlyn nodded and looked at Ivy. "Ivy, are you okay?" Ashlyn asked.
Ivy stood up. "I should've never asked," she said in a stilted voice and walked away.
