I appear not too far away, in another abandoned building. Before I can get my bearings I'm plowed with questions from my passenger.
"The king of hell!? You've been with him for…. Hundreds of years? Why? What are you, what are you planning? Do you even-"
"Oh shut UP! I'm tired, and need to plan my next move. Rowena's right, the art is getting repetitive. I need something unexpected now. So I need to plan, and rest a bit, not sleep though I think. And I really haven't eaten in a while… so I think it's time to finally say our… well your farewells."
"Wait!" I pause, fingers ready to snap.
"Why?" There is silence. I shake my head and raise my hand.
"I'll, I'll bring you food!" At this I pause. Interesting. This was a new situation for me. When I was with Crowley, in the beginning before he held complete ownership of my soul, he couldn't kill me. I was green, unused to the torment, physiological at least… Perhaps I would have sacrificed someone else to keep myself alive at that point. Although, probably not. My fear of death was in not knowing what came after, if Crowley 'killed' me, my soul, I knew where I would go. The fear of the unknown no longer applied, besides the only situation where Crowley would destroy me now was unwillingly. Probably in a fit of withdrawal. I shake my head. These thoughts were making it hard to ignore the curse. I ponder Chris, search him and shake my head.
"I can read you little boy. You'd leave and betray me, sacrifice yourself trying to find some way to kill me, bring attention to me. So no, I'll give you another option, for your duplicitous intent. Bring me someone to eat, or I'll go out and eat three. And if you fail to return, or try to tell someone, I'll eat ten, and then I'll find you and return to your home, with ample room for seconds, thirds, and dessert." I feel him quake and I laugh.
"Are, are you serious?"
"Yes, and no. I don't fucking trust you to choose people who won't be missed! What I actually need you to do is find a place to bury a body or two."
"Why not just eat them if you're so hungry?"
"As much as I'd like to see if I bend the laws of physics, I know I don't bend the laws of time very well if at all. It would take for fucking ever. Four burgers per pound of meat. The human body is like 75 pounds of meat for an average person. That's a lot of fucking burgers. Ain't nobody got time for that. Certainly not me. Maybe after my next job but right now I have a deadline and I… am an idiot. I'll be eating on the job. Ugh. You know, I used to be able to ignore hunger so much more easily. When I was alive. I got nauseous after a day, but the hunger itself, it hurts. It's like an itch I can't scratch. It's so fucking annoying." Christo is silent, having no response. I shake my head and frown.
"Let's go start some recon."
"Recon?"
"I need to find out more about the demon I'm going to eat and figure out the best strategy…." I pause and look down at my current meat suit, and frown, then smile. It was time for a change. There was no way I would be able to get in there looking like this, besides the ratty clothing there was no reason for anyone to answer a stranger's questions. But a king's….
I focus on a face I now knew better than my own and my gut wrenches painfully. I'd definitely need to eat something… someone, if I wanted to change again. I feel the face I had now seen more than my own and then look down and frown. Wearing Crowley wouldn't work, not in these clothes… I snap, thinking of the suit I wore, Crowley wore, as me. Nothing. I sigh. I guess it has to be a real thing, that suit had probably disintegrated years ago. I snap again and the suit I had left a note on some months back is in my hands, the note still on it. Apparently Crowley hadn't been able to find anything wrong with it, obviously, but was still too cautious to wear it. I would be.
I hold the suit in front of me, looking at the cut and begin to concentrate. Soon enough my body starts to change, painfully. This requires a lot of energy, not as much as growing arms, but I am changing another person's body, not mine. It's difficult. I'd need to eat something soon. I sigh. I'm tired of eating. It was time consuming when I was alive and I really was looking forward to not having to eat now. Fuck me.
I sigh as I change clothes. I'm tired. I'm trying to think of something fun to do but decide against it. I'm tired, and this isn't really fun. I just want to paint and mildly irritate him, not whatever this was going to be. The suit is as well cut as and form fitting as ever. Quality hasn't gone down in the past few hundred years, nice to know people still make clothes by hand. I button up the front and dust off the front before snapping myself to the massage parlor.
I had been here before. Many times. Crowley always got a massage monthly, as well as when he was stressed, or pleased. I was always shunted away, put in a jar, stuffed down somewhere small and dark. It was private time, time to relax, and he didn't want the chance of me enjoying it… or maybe he just enjoyed not having my constant commentary for a bit. Either way I didn't know what happened during his massages, so I would have to find out.
My plan was simple, walk in as the king and ask for a smoke check from my masseuse, then kill her or him and rip them apart until I find out what I need to know. Maybe it'd help my aching muscles and stomach. I sigh. I had to deal with this when I was alive due to stress and an inability to stop working on projects until they were done or I was in pain. I had really not imagined a world where I had to deal with it after I died. This wasn't even my body!
I walk up the cement steps to the entrance of the modern chic building. The half moon doors are surrounded by light blue circular windows set into cement that curve up to a dome. I pause as I reach for the metal handle, hearing voices on the other side mention a particular person.
"-King is coming Wednesday."
"The King? I don't want to take him. Susie can-"
"No way. I'm not risking my hide if he doesn't like the massage, or the happy ending." I turn on my very dapper heel and walk away shaking my head.
Nope. Nope. Not happening.
"What?"
I refuse to give a 'happy ending' to Crowley. It's just not happening. As nice as it might end up being, as sexy as he might have been or be, to some, no. He'd lost his appeal after the few hundred years of torture. The heels of expensive shoes make a discordant beat as I quickly walk down the stairs, snapping mid step as the street lights flicker to vanish to somewhere far fucking away. I'd just have to find another way to satisfy Rowena. Or ignore it. Or kill her? I walk through the bright streets of Italy. I need food for thought.
It doesn't take long to acquire cake. I am in Italy. With chocolate cake. Everything else can wait. Wait. I look at the bakery where I had acquired the cake. I pay the waiter a bit more and moments later look at the second piece of cake. It's rich, 7 layers of decadent sinful chocolate. I snap and take a bit of paper from my newly arrived sketchbook and pencils and scribble a note.
"To king Fergus from the demon formerly known as Chew Toy. Enjoy."
I fold the paper and set it down on the plate, then snap it away.
"Why? What does that accomplish?"
"Nothing. But like the suit, he might think it means something. Speaking of, I need to change."
"Clothes?"
"Bodies."
It's night by the time I find a new body I like and dispose of the soul inside. As sparks fly like a memory of fireflies, I push aside thoughts of what regret might feel like if I become human again, I stand looking over the old body. It looks a bit odd and malformed, but that's to be expected having been warped by demon magic. It wasn't grotesque or disturbing, just…. ok maybe it was a bit disturbing but it wasn't grotesque.
"You're joking right? It looks like a wax figure melted."
"They still have wax museums?"
"Uh yeah….?" I hear the questioning tone in his mental thoughts and shake my head.
"Wax museums were kinda tacky when I was alive, hundreds of years ago. That they are still around…"
"Well, digital recreations are, the only physical ones are in Texas and Dublin I think." I roll my eyes and ponder, I needed meat, or sim, I hadn't quite figured out what fueled my transformations. I just… I look at the twisted form and shake my head. Food was food. Meat was meat. This was still gross, and the idea of eating a human that was more intact held no specific pleasure for me. I pull up a pants leg and once again carve the symbol that prevented me being found onto the smooth skin of my new home.
Now, wagyu beef, food I didn't get to enjoy in life, if that provided fuel... That would be nice. If it was just physical matter I needed to transform a body it would be easier. Too many missing bodies meant a trail. If I needed like material, as in humans matter to modify a human body, or a rat if I inhabited a rat… it made sense but it would suck. I sigh and snap setting my hand on fire and use it to cauterize the wound. Something I should have realized I could do a while ago.
I also had another problem. How to keep Rowena happy and myself away from Crowley. I mean, the cake was a small flirt, well Rowena might interpret it that way. Crowley would interpret it as annoying.
The grey clouds rush past above, mirroring my mind, and decided lack of ideas. I look down at the puddles reflecting the sky and my new face. The amber creamy skin of the angular face is mirrored by looping black curls, dyed according to the broken up soul. She's beautifully made up, with flawless skin and perfectly applied contouring. Unlike me in life. I pause. My old body. I grin.
"Is Wikipedia still a thing?"
"Wikipedia wasn't a thing when you were alive? They employ 50,000 people as fact checkers and 2000 people manage their-"
I use Satina's wrist phone and look up my book, and then my author page. And there was a photo of me, my face, my body. Memories rush back as I see it, tiny things I had forgotten. Scars on my skin, from a saw blade accident, cats, razors, pimples. Plucking my eyebrows, my chipped tooth… I remember my body. My face.
Let's see if Crowley does. Let's paint him a nude.
