You give me something
Summary: Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger are sleeping with the enemy. Just a physical thing, and nothing more. She doesn't want more than that. At least, Draco has convinced himself of that. And is it really everything he wants from her? One-shot.
Rating: R for language and mentions of sexual situations.
Disclaimer: I don't own the delicious Draco :wink, though I look like Hermione a bit.
AN: Another one-shot I came up with. James Morrison's song was an inspiration. When I started this, I liked it because I was in a fluff mood. Now I'm not sure anymore.
I hope everyone likes it though.
You want to stay with me in the morning
You only hold me when you sleep
Draco Malfoy woke up from yet another good night sleep. He was startled by the naked girl in his bed, who was still clinging to him possessively in her sleep. He looked at the sweet smile on her face and wondered if he should let her sleep peacefully or wake her up rudely, like he was used to doing with the other girls he found naked in his bed in the morning.
He ran his fingers through her brown curly hair and pondered the possibilities. His movement might have startled her, since she moved even closer to him. He checked if she had woken up already, but only found the same smile on her face, while she was still sleeping soundly.
"Granger, get your gorgeous bookworm body out of this bed," he said in an annoying sing-song voice that would definitely wake her up. The fact that he knew this about her was starting to creep him out quite a bit. It wasn't supposed to be that way, he thought.
"You think I'm gorgeous Malfoy," she said in a voice still heavy with sleep, still not realizing just how tight her hold on him was, still smiling sweetly as she opened her chocolate brown eyes and looked at him. He didn't smile back at her, he just looked at her intensely.
"Up for another round already," she responded to the look in his eyes. He was thinking about confirming this – since it was, in fact, true what she said – but then decided not to get too distracted by her charm. She always managed to distract him somehow.
"Look Granger, I know you want me and all, but I still need to breathe somehow," he then spoke as he touched her arms, which were still holding him firmly in place, until she looked down and realized what she was doing. A strong blush immediately rose to her cheeks.
I was meant to tread the water
But now I've gotten in too deep
He looked at that unbelievably shy smile on her face and tried to hide a smile. He shouldn't smile at her. He shouldn't think she was adorable when she blushed. It was supposed to be a physical thing only, and nothing more than that. He sighed as he looked at her, then hid his discomfort about the situation easily behind one of his infamous Malfoy smirks.
"Sorry about that Malfoy," she then said, still avoiding to look at him. She was probably embarrassed about being clingy, even if it was in her sleep. The deal agreed on not getting clingy towards the other person. It was supposed to be a thing for lonely nights only.
He wondered when it started to become just a little more than that. He wondered when she started staying the night at his place, instead of going back to her place immediately after their enjoyable activities. He wondered when he no longer minded. He wondered when they started having conversations about other things then the lust for each other. He wondered when he stopped accepting invitations to other girl's beds. He wondered when he started to feel strangely comfortable in her place after another one of the marathons they had together. He wondered when things had changed into where they were at that moment.
"It's okay, I know I'm irresistible," he teased, and she smiled yet again. She smacked his arm playfully, then kissed him, long and hard. He immediately felt up for another round, and she must have known this. She ended the kiss end stepped out of his bed, still smiling.
"Granger, you are such a tease when you want to be," he spoke, fighting a smile. He had been doing that a lot lately, he noticed. But he didn't think so much of it.
For every piece of me that wants you
Another piece backs away
"You are much worse Draco Malfoy," she spoke, now dressed in one of the bed sheets. She was dancing across the room, and the smile he had been fighting won this time. He started to smile at her. It started as a sweet smile, but it then turned in to the smile of a predator who had just seen its prey. She must have recognized this kind of smile, it was more usual for him.
"You are going to scream my name again in a few minutes Granger," he spoke, and looked at how her complexion changed to bright red again. He just knew she was shivering, and not because of the cold. His predator smile was still there as she moved closer to the bed.
"Then get on with it Malfoy," she taunted him, still moving closer to him. He pulled her on the bed with him and smiled again, just before he started kissing his way down her body.
You give me something
That makes me scared alright
After another round, they laid down on the bed again, together. They both had the same goofy smile on their faces as they snuggled a little closer, coming close to spooning.
He was a little scared at this moment. He wasn't used to the cutesy stuff, and he never expected to get used to it either. The things that had changed between them were starting to get to him, and it was starting to be too much. Maybe he had to halt it, end it, make the confusion and the other scary things stop. But he couldn't leave her somehow.
That was starting to scare him too. He started calling her more often, from once or twice a months immediately after Hogwarts to every single day now. It seemed he just couldn't get enough of her. And not just in the sexual way, in seeing her and hearing her voice also, and other equally silly and trivial things like that. It was really starting to scare him.
This could be nothing
But I'm willing to give it a try
He had this scary feeling it was starting to be more than just something physical. And he had these scary thoughts that he just might like that, that he just might like to mean more to her than just a guy for the lonely nights. That had never happened to him before.
He seemed to experience a lot of new things with her. He sighed and looked at the girl beside him, the girl he used to hate so much. She was gorgeous, inside and out.
Please give me something
Cause someday I might know my heart
It was just that he wasn't sure about it all. He wasn't sure about his own feelings, let alone hers. For all he knew she could just think of him as her latest sex toy. He hoped that wasn't the truth, but he still didn't know. He had to know before he would even consider telling her parts of what he was thinking. He didn't want to be embarrassed in front of her.
You already waited up for hours
Just to spend a little time alone with me
That night, after his long and tiring Quidditch practice with his friends, he found her asleep in his chair, waiting for him to come home. He couldn't believe it was true. He couldn't believe it was really her sitting there, just to wait for his return. It just couldn't be true, it couldn't.
He looked at her sleeping face, still as gorgeous as he remembered from that morning, and just smiled. A small smile turning into a full on, and painful huge smile that could have lit up the room if someone had seen it. He had almost started laughing, but he was scared that would wake her up. And she looked so peaceful, he didn't want to disturb that.
What was this strange feeling that he was having? This feeling that he could take on the entire world if he would have wanted to. This feeling of being able to jump in the air out of pure joy and happiness. It was strange to him; he had not felt this before. Not for anyone.
And I can say I've never bought you flowers
I can't work out what they mean
The bag with his Quidditch gear in it, the one he had been holding all this time softly dropped to the floor. He had this silly urge to well, he didn't even know what. He needed to show her how wonderful she was, he needed to show her what she meant to him. A lot more than he let on, of course. It was something special, something pure, something good.
He would have gotten her flowers, if he had been that kind of guy to be able to say things with beautiful flowers. He would have gotten her jewellery, if she had been that kind of girl to think about diamonds as a girl's best friend. But that wasn't like them at all.
But in their own stupid and crazy ways, they had said all these things already, he suddenly realized. By making all of the changes he had been thinking about, and by allowing all of it to happen to them. Deep down, they must have known there could have been something more.
Never thought that I'd love someone
That was someone else's dream
And maybe, just really maybe, that something more was real and pure love. He didn't know if it was true, because this was after all still a foreign concept to him, but he thought that might be the truth about them. It might be true that they were in love, after all this time.
He had been denying all of the things leading up to this, he realized. Because well, even after all of this time, she was still Hermione Granger and he was still Draco Malfoy. They used to be enemies, and that doesn't mix with being more than that. It may have seemed very stupid, but to them it wasn't. Somehow, they just couldn't let go of the past.
Maybe they would always remember the other person being the enemy. He wanted to let go of the past, of the stupid mistakes he had made when he was just a confused young boy in search of someone to look up to. He chose the wrong person at first, but he made up for it in the end.
Cause you give me something
That makes me scared alright
This could be nothing,
But I'm willing to give it a try
He noticed her softly stirring in her sleep. He tried not to make a sound, in order to keep her asleep. She looked so beautiful asleep, he thought, still feeling some shame about these thoughts he was having. But Merlin have him if it wasn't the truth. He ran a hand through her hair, and smiled when her face turned to him, yet still beautifully asleep.
"Is that you Draco," she spoke softly, her voice heavy with sleep. He felt almost happy when she called him by his first name. She never did that, and he never called her by her first name either. It started like a stupid rule of the deal, but it ended up being something to keep possible feelings at bay. If you didn't call someone by their first name, you couldn't feel something for them besides lust and want and need. They were so easily fooling themselves and the other.
"Yeah, it's me Hermione," he spoke, just wanting to test how her first name would sound on his lips. And strangely enough, it sounded really good, and it didn't feel weird at all. Maybe he could use her first name more often in the future. He wasn't sure, because he didn't know if they were going to have a future. At least, in a future together kind of way.
Please give me something
Cause someday I might call you from my heart
He looked at her while she was gradually waking up, not knowing what to do next. Would he continue on the track they were on; the long hot nights together? Or would he come clean and say that he just might want something more of her? He didn't know what to do anymore.
"What time is it Malfoy," she said, now finally fully awake. He didn't like the fact that her waking up completely meant that she would stop calling him Draco. He never liked his name that much, but coming from her lips it almost sounded nice. He smiled on the inside.
"It is just a few minutes past eleven love," he responded, mentally slapping himself for the slip-up. He was not supposed to say that to her. He looked at her, as if waiting for the freak out that was bound to happen when she realized just exactly what he had called her.
"Ron must have been waiting for me for hours now," she said, not even realizing the term of endearment that had just come from his lips. He felt like his heart was breaking, how stupid and corny it might have sounded. She had to go back to Ron Weasley, of all people.
But it might be a second too late
And the words I could never say
Are gonna come out anyway
"Merlin Hermione, please don't leave," he responded to the hurried grabbing of her stuff, before he had even realized what those words were implicating. The words were out of his mouth before he had even thought about it. He was so completely and utterly embarrassed by the rejection that would undoubtedly follow. He couldn't even look at her anymore.
"Well, does this mean you're a little jealous Malfoy," she teased him, and he slowly started to look up at her. If this was any other situation, he would have said something about Malfoys never being jealous, but he just couldn't step past this situation anymore.
"What if I am Granger," he said, finally throwing a part of his feelings out, sighing loudly.
"Then I'll tell you that there's nothing to worry about," she easily answered, smiling at the unsure look that must have shown on his face. He could finally look her in the eyes again, and when he did look into her eyes, her happiness showed in that look on her face.
"He just needs help with proposing to Lavender," she continued, still smiling at him. He could finally show some of his relief about this turn to the conversation. It didn't make any sense, but he had been horrendously jealous at Ron Weasley for a second. Terribly stupid!
"Aren't you disappointed it's not you the Weasel is popping the question to," he asked, wanting to make sure he never had to be jealous at that pathetic person again. It made him feel really stupid, and he hoped he had nothing to be jealous about. He looked at her expectantly.
"Of course I'm not disappointed," she said, laughing as if his question seemed absolutely ridiculous to her. "If I was disappointed he doesn't like me like that, I wouldn't be sleeping with you, making love to you every night. I would be seeing Ron as much as I could."
Her use of the term making love gave him even more hope that something might happen, he thought. Because if she had used fucking or just having sex with, it would indicate that it meant nothing more than that to her. This showed it could also mean more to her.
Cause you give me something
That makes me scared alright
This could be nothing
But I'm willing to give it a try
Please give me something
"I'm glad that you're not disappointed, if that makes any sense," he spoke, feeling as if he was eighteen again, and too shy to make a move on her, even though he had been wanting her for a while now. He still couldn't forget it had been her to propose the damn deal that got them so close in the first place, that it was her who had made the first move.
"Are you trying to tell me something," she wondered out loud, and he almost started blushing at her question. But Malfoys never blushed, so he didn't. He couldn't believe he was feeling so incredibly insecure about this, he thought. It was such a foreign concept to him.
"I want to end the damn deal right now," he spoke, and the smile on her face disappeared immediately. He didn't know if she got the reason for these words correctly. She was probably thinking that he didn't want anything to do with her anymore, and that was really the furthest thing from his mind. He just wanted to end the restrictions of the damn deal.
"You're going to end it just like that," she asked him, seeming to be absolutely furious with him, her cheeks red with fury, almost scaring him. "After all of these years, and everything we've been through you just want to fucking quit? Why? Don't you want me anymore? Am I still Mudblood Granger to you perhaps? Don't you fucking care at all?"
When she talked about all of the things they had been through, he remembered things. He remembered so many things. He remembered the day it had all started, when she made her first move on him, so soon after that damn War. He remembered the first few phone calls, or booty calls as she liked to call them sometimes. He remembered the day his father had gotten the feared and dreaded Dementor's Kiss last year, and his first instinct had been to call her, of all people. This wounded up being yet another booty call for her, and she didn't leave his house for a week, calling in sick from her work, a thing he had never expected from Know-It-All Granger. It was stupid that he only started to realize these things now.
Cause you give me something
That makes me scared alright
This could be nothing
But I'm willing to give it a try
Please give me something
Cause someday I might know my heart
"Don't get your panties in a twist Granger," he said calmly, trying to get her to act rationally, because he did not want to be killed by her on a furious rampage. She was a bit terrifying when she was angry, he realized. He swallowed the bulge in his throat.
"Don't you care at all Malfoy," she spoke softly, seeming to be on the brink of a nervous breakdown. He felt for her, but he didn't want to give her his pity, because he somehow knew she would absolutely hate that. He just had to tell her the complete and utter truth.
"I'm ending it because I care Hermione," he said, and the sound of her first name on his lips made her look at him instantly. He knew he never called her by her first name, and he knew he wouldn't all of a sudden go cutesy and lovey-dovey on her, but it was a start.
"So the big bad Malfoy has started to care for the pathetic little Mudblood," she spoke, mocking herself and him at the same time. He still feared for a nervous breakdown, and he had not even started explaining himself yet, which made him even more nervous.
"Yes Granger, I fucking care about you," he yelled out, not knowing what to say to her anymore, and still nervous. "Hear me out! I want to end this damn deal because I care about you Granger. I think you deserve to be more than just a fuck buddy. I want to ask you out after ending the deal. On a real date, somewhere in public. I want more Granger!"
The silence in the room was deafening after these words. She just looked at him, eyes wide open in surprise. He hoped this was a good sign, and that this would mean that she wasn't going to laugh at him for his confessions. He looked at her expectantly.
"Let's end this damn deal Malfoy," she finally spoke, still looking into his eyes. His heart soared and he felt like he could bloody fly without his damn broom. He smiled.
AN: And that was the end. And now, I'm definitely not in a fluff mood anymore. Got to write something with more angst and drama in it now. Damn those fluff plot bunnies!
Inge
