Woo, my classes got canceled and I got snowed in, so that means you guys get another update for this week! I should have another update by next weekend, so stay tuned! Also, a shout-out to you guys that have faved/watched this story without reviewing it! Hope you enjoy the ride!

The universe is filled with billions of extraterrestrial beings, many of them new and undiscovered! But one man named Dandy plans on finding and registering them all! He travels the universe with his crew and amazing pompadour in search of adventure, excitement, and boobies! These are the adventures of the dandiest guy in space, Space Dandy!

"Doctor Gel!" A voice screamed. A being that looked like a flamboyant sea captain with a flaming skull for a head spun around in his chair.

A man resembling a gorilla dressed in an elaborate suit ran into the room.

"You called, Commodore Perry?" He asked, his voice shaky.

"We haven't appeared in this fanfiction at all! Three chapters have been posted, and you haven't attempted to catch him once! What the hell have you and Bea been doing?"

Dr. Gel thought back over his activities during the previous three chapters. He and Bea had been having a fantastic time, fishing, bar-hopping, and clubbing at every night club in that sector of the galaxy. Unfortunately, the Commodore wouldn't think kindly of their merriment, so he thought up an excuse on the spot.

"We've been busy trying to capture Dandy in the canon series!"

"You mean you've been busy failing! We're almost halfway through with season one in the canon series, and you haven't even come close to capturing Dandy!"

"But commodore! It's not my fault! The show's writers-"

"Silence!" Perry shouted at his subordinate. "I'm sick of your excuses! I have decided to take on the task of capturing Dandy myself, since my so-called 'top officer' can't accomplish what should be a simple task!"

Commodore Perry rotated his chair towards an alien sitting at a computer console.

"You! Send out an order to the entire Gogol fleet! We're deploying!"

"Yes, sir!" The alien answered.

"Sir," another alien sitting at a computer console said. "We're receiving a priority one message from our emperor."

"Put it through," Commodore Perry hissed.

The alien pushed a few buttons and a huge, holographic screen appeared before Commodore Perry. Displayed on the screen was not the emperor of the Gogol Empire, but the holographic image of a human woman with long, blue hair and an odd tattoo below her left eye. She had piercing green eyes and a wicked grin that seemed to cut through Commodore Perry's soul, even though the message was pre-recorded.

"Greetings, Commodore Perry, I am Claire," the recording played. "I am calling to tell you that as of this morning, the Gogol Empire has been assimilated into Cybernetic Solutions Incorporated in order to pay off a massive debt your empire accumulated while waging war against the Jaicro Empire. You will retain your military positions, but you and your men are now under my command. I am ordering you to disregard any orders you have received from your former emperor and report to the coordinates encrypted into this message. If you do not, you will be found guilty of desertion, and you will be sentenced to death. Also, to give you incentive, I have sent my personal agent to ensure that you follow these orders."

"Sir!" The alien at the control panel exclaimed. "There's an intruder aboard the ship!"

"Send in the patrol units in that sector and take care of them!" Commodore Perry fumed. He was already not happy with the news he had just received.

"I'm not picking up any vital signs from patrol units three, five, or twelve! I think they've been wiped out!"

"Impossible!" The Commodore turned his attention back to the hologram. "What have you put on my ship?" He demanded.

"She is CyberSol Inc.'s latest project," Claire answered.

Blueprints flashed across the holo-screen.

"The corpse of a fallen, Sepian warrior granted new life using the latest in CyberSol biotechnology and techno-organics."

Everyone in the room heard a commotion outside the door, gunshots and screaming as the guards on the other side tried to fight off something. But their efforts were in vain, as blood-curdling screams silenced the gunshots, then silence. A metal blade wedged itself between the door and pried it open.

A tall, shapely woman with brown hair and a tail walked into the room, dragging the two guards from outside with her. Her appearance heavily resembled Carrie's, but she was much taller and the left side of her face was heavily scarred. Her left eye was replaced with a mechanical, red eye. The end of her tail was fitted with a bladed weapon and she wore tattered, battle-scarred clothing. She threw one of the dead guards at Commodore Perry's feet, tore the other dead guard's arm off, and bit into it. She stared at Perry with an emotionless gaze.

"This is Shusuka. She is CyberSol Inc.'s strongest, most loyal agent. She does not take orders from anyone but me, and she does not take kindly to insubordination."

Perry's personal guards reluctantly drew their weapons, ready to fight to the end to defend their leader, but the Commodore waved them down.

"Stand down, men. They win this round."

"I expect you to arrive within three days, or Shusuka will kill you and every crew member aboard your ship. Her space titanium frame should be able to withstand any of your marine's hand-held weapons and her strength is more than triple that of of your entire crew combined. Please, do not upset her. You are all valuable assets to CyberSol Incorporated, and replacing you and your vessel would be exceedingly costly."

Commodore Perry snarled and gripped the arm rests on his chair.

"And with that, I bid you good day, Commodore, and hope that you have a… pleasant journey!"

And with that, the transmission ended. Commodore Perry glared at Shusuka, who was still eating the dead guard she killed a few minutes ago.

"If you think I'm going to take orders from you and your… boss, you are sorely mistaken!"

He roared, the flames engulfing his head shooting towards the ceiling.

Shusuka stared at the Commodore. She swung her tail like a whip and decapitated one of Commodore Perry's alien minions. She gave Perry a nasty glare and bit into the arm again.

"C-commodore…" Dr. Gel stammered.

The Commodore tried to think of a solution to get rid of this overpowered monster standing before him, but he currently lacked the resources needed to take her down. He leaned back in his chair and propped his food on his knee thoughtfully.

"Right… Dandy can wait another day." Perry replied, his flames dying down quickly. He pointed at another minion, who was cowering behind his computer. "You! Contact the rest of the fleet, and set a course for CyberSol Incorporated. We're going to pay our new…'boss'… a visit!"

And with that, The Commodore's fleet shot off into hyperspace.

Meanwhile, flying right through the Commodore's former location was the Aloha Oe. If the Commodore had merely waited a few moments before heading out, he could've had Dandy fly right into his clutches, but that would make for a very short chapter, wouldn't it?

"What the hell was all that about?" Meow asked, reading over the events in the first paragraphs.

"Beats the hell outta me," Dandy replied. "As long as it doesn't interfere with our big 500,000 woolong job, I don't give a damn!"

Dandy flew the Aloha Oe towards a massive space station. It docked beside a landing platform and Dandy exited his ship with his crew. The four of them followed a little mouse-shaped robot who led them to an office door.

"Come on in!" A voice inside yelled.

Dandy, QT, Carrie, and Meow stepped through the doorway to find a huge, obese man sitting at a desk. He had green skin and huge tusks poking out of his mouth but looked human otherwise.

"I would offer you folks a drink, but we're having a shortage on liquids…"

"A shortage on liquids?" QT asked.

"That's why I called you," the large, alien man replied, his voice haggard and dry as his parched mouth.

"Listen, we're alien hunters, not plumbers!" Dandy exclaimed in protest.

"That's why I called you! Our water problem is something of a more sinister nature. You see, we were mining for ethrite crystals when we stumbled across some unidentified creature. It attacked our men and drained all of the water we use to cool our heavy equipment. And to make matters worse, it's attacked our facilities and drained them of all of their water as well!"

The man got on his hands and knees and graveled at Dandy's feet.

"Please! I'll pay anything you want to get rid of it! I haven't been able to flush my toilet in weeks!" He sobbed. "My mouth's so dry!"

Dandy grinned and gave the man a thumbs-up. "Leave it to us! We'll bag your alien!"

"Oh, thank you! Thank you!" The man kissed Dandy's feet. "It's staying on the third largest asteroid orbiting the closest planet!"

The man pulled a small device out of his pocket, which projected a map of the planet and a ring of asteroids orbiting it. He pointed to a large asteroid outlined in red.

"I've got the coordinates saved, Dandy," QT said.

"I got the snacks!" Carrie exclaimed, waving around a bag of chips.

"My phone's fully charged and ready to take pics," Meow added, spinning his phone around as if it were a gun.

"Then, we're all set to go!"

Dandy and his crew left the office, the man still on his knees.

"Oh, I hope they get that thing soon," he muttered, holding his gurgling stomach. "I'm going to need to use the bathroom…"

The Aloha Oe pulled out from the space station and navigated carefully through the asteroid thicket. It came across bits of broken mining equipment and wrecked supply vessels along the way, shriveled corpses floating around them.

Finally, the ship made it to the target destination. The asteroid was surrounded by a portable atmosphere, giving it a bluish tinge and making it easy to spot amongst the other asteroids. The Aloha Oe landed gently on its surface and Dandy and his crew stepped out to start their hunt.

Dandy un-holstered his pistol and looked around. The place was completely barren, abandoned mining equipment left unattended.

"QT, scan the area for any signs of movement."

"Already on it, Dandy!"

"Meow, keep an eye on our flank!"

"Yeah, whatever," Meow muttered, typing on his phone.

"Carrie," Dandy said, turning towards the Sepian who was cramming bacon-wrapped snack cakes in her mouth. "Make sure you distribute that fat evenly. I don't want your boobs to get bigger than your ass."

"Okay," Carrie answered, still eating.

"Dandy, there's movement to our right! Follow me!"

"Alright, let's go bag us an alien!"

QT led Dandy and the others across the asteroid. Carrie following behind Dandy, still stuffing her face, and Meow brought up the rear, still typing on his phone. The four of them came across a dig site, the ground littered with broken excavation equipment and badly-shriveled bodies dressed in mining uniforms.

"Damn, what could've done this?" Dandy asked.

"I don't know," QT answered, scanning the area.

"Aw, my snacks are all gone," Carrie whined as she tipped her snack cake bag upside down and shook it.

As Dandy knelt down to examine one of the corpses, he heard a moan. One of the shriveled-up miners slowly started to move towards Dandy and his crew. His face was horribly dried and shriveled, making him look like a mummy without bandages.

"So… thirsty…" the miner wheezed. He weakly grabbed Dandy's ankle. "Water… please… sir…"

Dandy pulled out a canteen and gave it to the man, who swallowed every drop.

"Thank you…," he rasped.

"What happened?" Dandy asked.

"Th-that… thing... attacked… and… you, have, to… leave!"

"We'll take care of it," Dandy told the highly dehydrated miner.

"Hey guys," Carrie said, her nose pointed upwards. "I smell water."

"Water? On an asteroid?" Meow asked. "Impossible!"

Just then, the four of them heard a scream.

"B-bobby…" the miner coughed.

"Meow, stay and watch this guy!"

"Hell no! Last time I stayed behind, I got tied to a tree by a crazed A.I.!"

"Fine, whatever!"

Dandy, Meow, QT, and Carrie ran to the source of the scream, where they came across a horrifying site. They found this miner, Bobby, engulfed in some kind of dark blue transparent tentacle. They watched as he shriveled up like a raisin, the tentacle sucking him dry like a Capri Sun juice packet.

Standing over him was a small, humanoid figure of a girl. Her hair was made up of these same writhing tentacles, all of them with a jagged, snake-like mouth. She had the body of a small girl and had light transparent blue skin that jiggled like gelatin.

Dandy approached quietly; the slime creature had its back to them.

"Sorry about sucking you dry," she sneered, "but I needed that water more than you!"

The tentacle spat the dried-out minor out, leaving his body a dry husk.

"Hold it right there!" Dandy pointed his pistol at the back of this creature's head. "You put that water, or whatever you sucked from that man back and come quietly, or I'll shoot you!"

The creature's snake-like hair turned towards Dandy. She grinned wickedly.

"I'm afraid you've messed with the wrong girl."

She spun around to attack, but was stricken by what she saw. The three most beautiful people she had ever seen. One of them had a handsome hairdo and a nice, big, strong jaw with a great set of teeth. The second one had the cutest face and the biggest breasts she had ever seen. The third one was a suave-looking, weasel-cat like creature wearing a stylish hat and a vest.

"What the hell! I'm not a weasel!" Meow protested. Mei-Lin Hayate

And the last one, well she didn't care much for robots, but she decided that three out of four wasn't bad. Her jaw dropped, along with the jaws of all the eyeless, snake-like tentacles covering her head.

"Oh, I'm sorry!"

She ran up to Dandy and loosely wrapped her tentacles around him.

"I had no idea you were such a space stud!"

"Ugh, keep those things away from me!"

Dandy slapped one of her tentacles off his shoulder.

"Don't worry…" She said seductively. "They don't bite…"

The tentacles all opened their slimy mouths and let out a low hiss.

"Sorry, but I'm not interested in younger women… Or women with slugs for hair…"

"That's perfect. I'm five-hundred and thirty…"

She tried to put her tentacles around Dandy again, but he backed off and swatted them away. The slime frowned and turned her attention to the Sepian and Betelgeusian watching.

"Fine, maybe your other friends would like to play…"

"What's your deal, kid!" QT demanded.

"Kid!" The strange creature exclaimed. "Kid!? I'll show you kid, you damn, talking toaster!"

The creature lashed out at QT with one of her tentacles, but Dandy shot its head off with his pistol. The severed head of the creature fell to the ground in front of QT, let out a screech, and dissolved into a pile of blue goo. The tentacle then grew another head, and three more shot out and grabbed Dandy. She took away his gun and dragged him towards her.

"You're a naughty boy," she said seductively. "But I forgive you."

"Ugh, I told you, Dandy doesn't swing that way, baby!"

"Then, how do you want me to swing? I can be anything you want. All I need is a little… liquid."

The creature puckered her lips and leaned in to Dandy. Dandy broke free from her grasp and crawled over to his crew as she laughed sinisterly. His clothes were stained a light blue and soaking wet from her grip.

"What the hell is that thing?" Meow asked, hiding behind Dandy's leg.

"I'll ask," Carrie said. "Hey! What are you supposed to be?"

"I'm Scyllia," she said with a hiss. "I'm an Arquarian."

"What the hell's an Arquarin?" Dandy whispered to QT.

"I dunno. Must be another thing the author made up."

"I'm gonna kick his ass," Dandy muttered. "Where is he?"

Dandy looked towards the screen, but the author was nowhere to be seen.

"Dammit!"

"Wait, if the author's missing, then who's writing the story?" Meow asked before he felt something knock him off his feet.

Dandy and Carrie fell to the ground as well, all three of them being dragged towards Scyllia by their legs; she had grabbed them while their attention was on Dandy.

"Not just one, but three handsome, cute playthings," Scyllia cackled as she dragged them closer.

"I told you, Dandy doesn't swing that way, baby!" Dandy exclaimed. "I'm an ass-man!"

"Surely you can make an exception!" Scyllia replied coyly. "Just let me absorb some of the water from this storage tank and I can be whatever you want me to be…" She turned towards a huge tank of water. "I stole it from these miner-guys."

"Dandy! We can't let her absorb the water from that tank!" QT yelled.

"We'll have a little, Scyllia-Dandy time…" Scyllia hissed seductively. "Or maybe a little Scyllia, Meow, Carrie, and Dandy time! I've never had a four-way before…"

"Wait, can't we grab some more snacks first?" Carrie asked.

"No! Let me go!" Meow screamed. "She feels like a giant booger!"

Dandy went for his pistol, but realized that Scyllia still had it. One of her hair tentacles had swallowed it, but he could still see the shape of the gun inside of it. Dandy grabbed the tentacle and tore it in half, blue slime splattering everywhere. He pulled his slime-covered gun from the tentacle's, erm, throat, and used it to shoot the tentacles holding Carrie, Meow, and himself.

"Sorry sweetie," Scyllia hissed, sounding slightly agitated.

The tentacles Dandy shot off reformed and let out a shrill screech.

"That won't work!"

The tentacles lashed out at Dandy, but he shot them off with his gun. He put a few shots in Scyllia's head as well, but she just reformed and attacked again.

"Carrie, do something!" Dandy yelled as Scyllia's tentacle, snake, hair-things chased him around.

Carrie picked up an enormous boulder and threw it at Scyllia.

"Cute and strong…" Scyllia whispered as the boulder crushed her into a puddle of blue goo.

"Good work!" Dandy gave Carrie a thumbs-up. "QT, you can hold our prisoner!"

"Hold on, let me switch out to my water-tight vacuum container," QT replied.

As QT was changing out his containers, the slime from Scyllia started to pull itself together, but rather than re-form, it slithered towards the huge storage container full of water. QT finally finished swapping out his storage containers and began vacuuming the puddle, but only picked up water.

"Hey Dandy, there's only water here," QT remarked.

"What?"

"I only vacuumed up water! That Arquarian, or whatever, got away!"

"Shit!" Dandy shouted.

It then dawned on Dandy where Scyllia escaped to, but by then he was too late.

Dandy and his crew heard a loud creaking noise coming from the water tank and turned around. The tank swelled and groaned until it exploded, a giant version of Scyllia rising up out of it. She was massive, tall enough to make the Aloha Oe look like a yellow piece of candy in comparison.

"Run!" Dandy screamed as he ran off.

Carrie, Meow, and QT all ran off in different directions as Scyllia towered over them, wondering who would be her first victim.

"Got to… get to… the ship," Dandy panted as the ground shook beneath him.

The Aloha Oe was just ahead, but one of Scyllia's grabbed the yellow ship.

"Not so fast, pretty boy!" Scyllia roared. "You're not going anywhere until we have a little fun together!"

Scyllia dropped Dandy's ship down her throat and swallowed it.

Scyllia was about to grab Dandy next when a boulder hit her in the face. The boulder lodged itself partially in her gelatinous skin, but slid off of her harmlessly. The Arqarian turned to see Carrie standing up on a high plateau, getting ready to throw another boulder at her. Scyllia launched another one of her tentacles at the Sepian and knocked her off.

"Damn, this is gonna be tough!"

Dandy aimed his pistol at Scyllia's leg and put a few holes in it, but they closed up as the slime covering Scyllia's body sealed up her injuries.

"Dandy!" The alien hunter heard QT yell at him. The little robot rolled towards him. "What happened to the Aloha Oe?"

"She ate it!" Dandy screamed, pointing at the ship, which was floating around in Scyllia's newly-developed breasts.

"What!?"

"QT, how much will that water-tight container of yours hold?" Dandy asked.

He watched as Carrie lifted up a massive boulder.

"It can hold and compress up to ten gallons," QT replied.

Carrie launched the huge boulder at Scyllia, but the gelatinous alien absorbed the blow and broke the rock with her tentacle hair.

"I might've been able to hold her before, but at her present volume, there's no way!"

"Well, you're just gonna have to take one for the team!" Dandy grabbed QT's arms and shoved them into Scyllia's left leg. QT turned on his vacuums and started sucking up slime and water.

"I hate you, Dandy!" QT screamed as his container overflowed and he himself started to fill up with slime.

By the time Scyllia had realized what was going on, QT had sucked up enough water and slime to weaken her left leg and the huge Arqarian crashed to the ground, causing a huge, gelatinous tidal wave to splatter all over the ground. It swept away Dandy, QT, and Meow in a deep pool of slime. Scyllia quickly started to reform as QT stopped vacuuming.

Dandy's face poked out of the new slime lake, QT floating up beside him full to the point of bursting. Dandy spat out a huge stream of slime.

"Ugh, it tastes like salted ham!" He yelled.

"I'm going to explode…" QT said.

"Then empty that slime and come on! We gotta get to the ship, it's the only way we're gonna stop her!"

QT shot water out of his hands and followed the alien hunter.

"Look, there's the ship!"

QT exclaimed, pointing in the middle of the huge puddle of slime. Meow had already started swimming towards the floating Aloha Oe.

Meanwhile, Scyllia had begun to reform around them. She had finished reforming her head, hair tentacles, and right shoulder, but her progress was interrupted by a huge boulder to the head, once again courtesy of Carrie.

Dandy and QT swam through the slime towards the Aloha Oe. They could feel the slime pulsing as Scyllia started to reform slowly again. They heard Carrie throwing another boulder, but didn't bother to turn around to watch, instead scrambling aboard the ship. Inside they found Meow cowering under the couch.

"Good, you're here!" Meow exclaimed when he saw Dandy and QT. "Now let's get the hell out of here!"

"You mean you were in here the whole time!?" Dandy asked angrily. "Why didn't you transform the ship into the Hawaii Yankee Special®?"

"Well, I tried but…" Meow held up a broken joystick.

"Why you little-!" Dandy wrapped his hands around Meow's throat. "How the hell are we supposed to fight this thing now?"

Suddenly, the Aloha Oe shifted as the slime covering it was absorbed back into Scyllia's body, knocking Dandy to the floor.

"We can beat up Meow later!" QT shouted. "We've got bigger problems now!

"You're right!"

Dandy ran to the bridge and started the ship's engines.

"The Hawaii Yankee is too small to take on that monstrous dame, and the controls for the Hawaii Yankee Special® are broken, so we're gonna have to use the ship's secret weapon, the Aloha Beam!"

Dandy pushed a button on the ship's console, and the pontoon-like appendage attached to the side of the ship started to glow. The ship turned towards Scyllia, who had reformed into a huge, gelatinous and soggy upper torso. The cannon fired, blasting Scyllia in the face.

Dandy pressed another button and sections of the hull opened up to reveal missile bays, which launched a barrage of missiles at Scyllia. Dandy kept up the barrage as Scyllia screamed in pain. Scyllia then melted into a huge pool of slime and water and seeped into a huge crater to hide. Dandy kept up the barrage of missiles and laser bolts until one of Scyllia's hair tentacles busted out of the ground and grabbed the Aloha Oe.

"Shit!" Dandy cursed.

Dandy put the engines at full throttle and tried to break free from Scyllia's grasp, but they weren't strong enough. Scyllia pulled the ship down towards the ground. Meanwhile, Carrie was picking herself up off the ground. She watched as Scyllia oozed out of the huge crack in the ground her hair tentacle made.

"Any more ideas?" QT asked.

"Wait!"

Meow ran into the kitchen and returned with an orange, spongy rag.

"We can use this!"

"That useless Sham-wow rip-off thing we bought from that infomercial?" Dandy asked.

"Meow, I don't think that can hold all the water Scyllia has already absorbed!" QT reasoned with the Betelgeusian.

"It's worth a shot!"

Meow ran towards the ship's emergency hatch.

"Okay, I'll just drop this and…"

"Wait!" QT interrupted. "You have to make sure it makes contact with Scyllia's head or body! If it just hits a tentacle, it might not absorb enough water to do much to her!"

Meow stared down at Scyllia, who grabbed the Aloha Oe with another tentacle. She had reabsorbed all of her slime, but her legs remained a massive blob.

"Okay Milly Bays, you better not have lied about this thing's absorbing power," Meow mumbled as he stared at the odd-looking cleaning rag. "QT, I need you to launch me!"

"But, why? Can't you just throw the rag?"

"It'll look cooler! Now do it!"

QT vacuumed up Meow and the orange rag with one of his hands. He pointed his other hand at Scyllia's face and fired Meow at her.

Scyllia used one of her hands to pick up Carrie.

"Just two more and I'll have you three cuties all to myself!" Scyllia exclaimed, licking her lips.

Before Scyllia realized what was happening, she felt something penetrate her forehead.

"Give it up, Space Stud! You and your sexy friends are all mine!"

Suddenly, Scyllia started to feel weird. The water she absorbed was slowly being sucked out of her, and she started to lose her new mass. The tentacles holding the Aloha Oe became weaker and weaker until the yellow starship was able to break free from her grasp.

A huge, orange lump swelled up inside Scyllia's head until it grew to the size of a city block. Scyllia returned to her original size, only she was much scrawnier and a paler blue. The Aloha Oe landed back on the asteroid's surface and Dandy and QT exited the ship. QT used his vacuum hands to suck up the weakened Scyllia and trapped her in the water-tight container.

"Good team work!" Dandy congratulated everyone.

"Yeah!" Carrie cheered.

"Except for you…"

Carrie puffed out her cheeks and pouted.

"Aw, no fair. I helped, too."

QT pulled the container filled with pale blue goo out of his storage compartment.

"So what do we do with her now?"

Dandy grinned. "I'd tell ya, but I'm afraid of jinxing it! We're only at about five-thousand words, so I don't' want to jinx anything."

Meow crawled out from under the swollen orange not-Sham-wow.

"What I don't understand is how we even got that many words with nobody sitting at the laptop."

"As soon as that damn author comes back, I'm gonna deck him in the nose for creating such a character."

Dandy held the container close to his face and tapped on it. Scyllia's face formed at the side of the container and she winked seductively at him, causing Dandy to make a face in disgust.

The crew loaded up into the Aloha Oe and flew back to the space station with both Scyllia and the massive, orange towel full of water.

"Thank you! Thank you!" The fat alien man praised them. "And you even recovered all of our water! Now I can finally flush my toilet! I haven't been able to flush it in two weeks!"

"Eww…" QT grimaced.

Dandy proudly showed the man Scyllia, who was still trapped in her container.

"She was a tough catch, but no match for the original canon crew of the Aloha Oe!" Dandy boasted. Carrie glared at him, her arms folded under her boobs.

"As promised, here's your reward!"

The man gave Dandy a briefcase filled with five hundred thousand woolongs. Dandy grabbed it and shook the man's hand.

"Thank you, my good sir! Now if you'll excuse me, I have an alien to register!"

"All right! Just make sure it doesn't wind up back here!" The boar-alien yelled after him.

Dandy and his crew headed back to their ship with their catch.

"Only one last thing to do…"

Dandy gripped the handlebars he used to control the Aloha Oe, a huge grin spread across his face. In what seemed like no time at all, the ship docked at the registration center. Dandy ran towards the front door when he was stopped by a cloaked figure.

"Ah, you guys again!" A voice hissed from beneath the hood of the cloak.

It tilted back to reveal the metal skeleton man, Skrull.

"Creepy skeleton guy," Dandy greeted him.

"It's Skrull…"

"Yeah, whatever. How have you been? We haven't seen you since Chapter One!"

"Oh, I've been… busy." Skrull chuckled sinisterly. "Mostly just loafing around, now that I'm no longer playing any significant role in this fanfic." He noticed the container Dandy was holding. "Ah, got yourself some gelatin to give to the red-headed lady inside, eh?"

"No, this is our latest capture! She's our ticket to fortune!"

"Oh really? Mind if I have a look?" Dandy handed the creepy skeleton guy the container with Scyllia still crammed inside. "A slime creature, eh? Must've been hard to catch. They're tricky."

Skrull chuckled a bit and handed the container back to Dandy.

"Well, we're off to get this thing registered and collect our money," Dandy tucked the container under his arm.

"Very well. I'm meeting someone anyway," Skrull hissed, snickering a bit. "I had to sell my ship and need to find a way out of here."

"Hey, if you need a ride, I'd be glad to-"

"No thank you," Skrull hissed as he walked away. "Go cash in your alien. I'll see ya around."

And with that, Skrull ambled away, once again laughing sinisterly.

"Seriously, what is with that guy?" QT asked. Dandy just shrugged.

The four of them walked into the registration center with their catch and took their place in line. This place was always full of alien hunters cashing in on new alien species they'd caught, and today was no exception. After a long wait, they finally found themselves standing in front of Scarlet's desk.

"Well, look who's back," Scarlet said when she saw Dandy. "Hopefully you've got something good."

"Yes we do!" Dandy dropped the container on Scarlet's desk. "She calls herself a Aqua-something…"

"Arqarian," QT corrected him.

"Yeah, that…"

Scarlet examined the container, the gelatinous substance that was Scyllia jiggling a bit as she spun the container. Scyllia glared back at Scarlet with a single, purple eyeball, small snake-like tentacles sliding up the sides of the container. She looked closely at bits suspended inside Scyllia's body that looked like organs.

"Wow, it's not often we get slime aliens. It calls itself an Arqarian, you say?" Dandy nodded proudly. "Let me run a quick search…" Scarlet typed away at her computer.

"I guarantee you won't find anything on it," Dandy assured her.

"You're right, the database doesn't show anything on her. Is it sentient?"

"Quite," Meow answered, rolling his eyes.

"And I helped catch it, too!" Carrie asserted, shoving Dandy aside. "It grew huge and was like, roar, grr! But I threw rocks at it and…"

"Throwing rocks does not count as helping," Dandy interrupted her, shoving her aside. Carrie scowled at Dandy again. "Meow helped the most. If it wasn't for his idea with that orange Sham-Wow rip-off thing, we wouldn't have been able to catch it."

"Sham-Wow rip-off?" Scarlet asked.

"Yeah, it absorbs water, so we had to use it to soak out all the water it stole." Dandy rubbed his nose with his finger.

"So keep it away from water," Meow added.

QT placed a data chip on Scarlet's desk. "Here, this should help. It's all the data I collected when I contained her."

"Wow, I've never had an alien hunter give us data they've collected themselves! This will help immensely!"

Scarlet placed the container inside a tube and it was sucked away.

"Let me copy this data real quick…" Scarlet said as she plugged the data chip into her computer and skimmed over the data. "Wow, she's even more lecherous than you, Dandy…"

"I doubt that…" QT muttered. Dandy kicked the little robot to silence her.

"Scyllia's her name, eh? She has an interesting biological structure… You know, this is the first true slime alien I've looked at."

"Oh?" Dandy said.

"Yeah, this is a pretty rare find."

Scarlet pulled the chip out of her computer and handed it to Dandy.

"I've gotten everything off of it. After my boss runs through the data and something is done with Scyllia, we'll have your check ready."

Dandy grinned greedily. He and his crew all walked over to a row of chairs while Scarlet took Scyllia to the back for processing. The four of them sat down to wait for their money.

"You know, I wonder where the registry center gets the money to pay all these alien hunters," QT inquired.

"As long as they keep the gravy train going, I don't care."

Dandy laid back and stretched his legs , Carrie had caught another surveillance probe took a bite out of it. She swallowed the probe, then yawned.

"I think I'll take a nap…"

And with that, Carrie immediately passed out and fell over against the wall, sound asleep.

"Ugh, I can't wait to get out of here," Meow groaned. "I always hate waiting in this place."

"Well, you won't be waiting for long," Scarlet's voice replied. "The Arquarian has been registered and given a place to live since we can't send her back to that mining facility. As for your reward, spend it wisely."

Scarlet handed Dandy a check for two-hundred and fifty thousand woolongs.

"Hell yeah!" Dandy took the check and stuffed in his jacket pocket. "Say, you didn't place that alien somewhere close by, did you?"

"Not exactly. She was taken in as a crewmember by another alien hunter. Someone by the name of Xander, I think?"

"Xander!?" Dandy gritted his teeth. "I thought he was a sponsor now…"

"Well, it turns out he made enough money with his latest investment to start alien hunting full time again. He's putting together a crew and everything."

"Why that lousy, no-good asshole!" Dandy yelled. "He knows this is my hunting turf!"

"What's wrong?" Scarlet teased. "Can't handle a little competition?"

"Not like we're not already competing with thousands of other alien hunters..."

QT pointed at the huge line of alien hunters in front of them.

"Yeah, but those guys are just nameless extras!" Dandy argued. "Hell the author didn't even bother giving them a description!"

"Let's just go get this check cashed and bask in our new-found wealth before the reset button at the beginning of the next chapter takes it away from us," Meow said.

"What about Carrie?" QT asked.

"Eh, she'll be back at the ship by the next chapter," Dandy replied, walking out the door with Meow and QT. "Let's go have us a good time at Boobies!"

"Yeah!" QT and Meow exclaimed, throwing their fists in the air.

"Wait, aren't we forgetting something?" QT asked.

Dandy, QT, and Meow exchanged confused glances, then turned to stare at the reader.

Meanwhile, back on the asteroid, the dehydrated miner was still there. Dandy had forgotten to go back for him, and apparently, the mining company never bothered to go looking for him.

"Hello…," he wheezed. "Somebody? I'm still dying of thirst here!"