Chapter 403: Tree Hill
Thursday, February 9th, Morning
(Song Lyrics in Italics)
Haley sat behind the wheel of her Land Rover SUV. Every so often, she would look up from her smartphone and look at the building that the parking lot she parked in belonged to. After seeing nothing changed, she would turn back to her smartphone and pretended to answer business texts and emails. What Haley really did to pass the time was play one of her gaming apps.
This had become sort of a sad tradition for Haley and Nathan. When it came time for genetic testing, they would drive here. If the child were male, Nathan would go in; if it were a girl, it would be Haley. The other would wait out in the car for their partner. For Haley, this wait always seemed the longest.
Finally, Haley put down her smartphone and turned on the car's stereo. Leaning back, she closed her eyes and let the commercial play. Finally, the commercial ended, and the DJ spoke about something unimportant for what seemed like too long. Finally, the DJ announced it was the pre-lunch two for.
The familiar strains of a song came on the radio. Haley sat up and looked at the car's screen. The opening lines were song by a female vocalist; her voice was in a downtempo. The song was depressing, and Haley knew the song very well. One haunting line caught her in the heart.
Okay
Does it rain in California?
Only dream I've ever known
Will they love you when you're famous?
Where you'll never be alone
Hope someday I'll find nirvana
I'll be looking down below
I'll be dead at twenty-seven
Only nine more years to go
I got a bully in my head
Fake love, fake friends
I was broken when you left
Now you hear me everywhere you go
La-dah-dee, oh, la-dee-dah
Gonna be a supеrstar
Be the girl you used to know
Playing on thе radio
La-dah-dee, oh, la-dee-die
Loving me is suicide
I'm a dreamer, I'm on fire
La-dah-dee, run for your life
Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh
Yeah, yeah, I'm jxdn, I'm jxdn
Said I'm gonna be a rockstar, yeah, yeah, yeah
Told her I don't want a war, yeah, yeah, yeah
I don't see me going far, yeah, yeah, yeah
That's what happens when I fall apart
All of me wants all of you
But I'm far away and I can't choose
Got a lot of lessons that I need to learn
Got a lot of lessons
My depression and misconceptions
And all the mistakes that lead to lessons
My depression, it makes me question
My depression, it makes me question
La-dah-dee, oh, la-dee-dah
Gonna be a superstar
Be the girl you used to know
Playing on the radio
La-dah-dee, oh, la-dee-die
Loving me is suicide
I'm a dreamer, I'm on fire
La-dah-dee, run for your life
Does it rain in California
Where the angels cry for me?
Want the drugs that taste like candy
And blood diamonds in my teeth
(Ah!)
La-dah-dee, oh, la-dee-dah
Gonna be a superstar
Be the girl you used to know
Playing on the radio
La-dah-dee, oh, la-dee-die
Loving me is suicide
I'm a dreamer, I'm on fire
La-dah-dee, run for your life (Oh)
(Oh)
Yeah, I'm gonna be a superstar
The woman singing was a singer-songwriter named Anya Wolfle, well that's what she went by. As the song came out of the first chorus, a male voice kicked in. The voice wasn't as youthful as it once was and told the misspent time and talent story. This voice and song were a perfect example of line 3, plate 7 of the Proverbs of Hell in William Blakes's The Marriage of Heaven and Hell.
It had been a while since Haley heard the speaking voice of her youngest son. Haley listened to his singing voice all the time, as Brian's music is still heard on the radio. The youth has recently rediscovered his music, and people were calling him the voice of his generation. Yet, here Haley, his mom, sat waiting for his dad to return from giving a genetic sample to prove or disprove another fatherless child was fathered by Brian.
The song ended, and Haley looked at the screen waiting for the other shoe to drop. Would it be another Anya Wolfle song, or would it be another Brian song? Haley didn't have long to wait as another Anya Wolfle song came over the airwaves.
Yeah-yeah, yeah, yeah-yeah, yeah
Yeah-yeah, yeah, yeah-yeah, yeah
I could never
Talk how you talk, walk how you walk
'Cause I'd have a problem sleeping
Wandering eyes and comfortable lies
You seem to sleep just fine
I'm not a saint, and I make mistakes
But next to you I'm holy
Oh, I'm praying for your soul now
Praying for your soul
If we're counting crimes, nickels and dimes
We'd both have riches but you'd be the richest around
Around
I could never love me again
I could nevеr trust me again
If I did half of what you did, it's enough to make mе sick
I could never love me, love me, love me again (I could never)
Keep a straight face for causing you pain
Say it's your imagination
That's what you do like you gotta prove
You're not what I've had faith in (No)
If we're counting crimes, nickels and dimes
We'd both have riches but you'd be the richest around
Around
I could never love me again
I could never trust me again
If I did half of what you did, it's enough to make me sick
I could never love me, love me, love me again
Yeah-yeah, yeah, yeah-yeah, yeah
I could never
Yeah-yeah, yeah, yeah-yeah, yeah
I could never
I could never
I could never
I don't wanna play a sick twisted game
Of who can do worse to the other
And I'll walk away
I don't wanna play, ayy
I could never love me again
I could never trust me again
If I did half of what you did, it's enough to make me sick
I could never love me, love me, love me again
Yeah-yeah, yeah, yeah-yeah, yeah
I could never
Yeah-yeah, yeah, yeah-yeah, yeah
I could never
Haley closed her eyes and let the lyrics wash over her. Finally, she leaned forward and rested her forehead on the steering wheel. Her shoulders slumped as the song played on. After what seemed like forever, the song changed. It was a downer song; things had always seemed to be depressive when it came to Brian.
Did I fail you some way
That you're not telling now?
Did I fail you some way
Somewhere, somehow?
When you took that last step
Beyond the door
I can't follow you there
I can't follow for sure
It's a road that you take
All on your own
One you don't come back from
And there's no place like home
I wish you were here
How I wish you were here
I'm out on my own, I'm so far from home
And I wish you were here
Are you watching me now?
All alone in this place
Are you seeing me cry?
Oh, how I miss your facе
And the warmth of your smile
The light in your еyes
There was no "fare thee well"
And there was no "goodbye"
And I wish you were here
How I wish you were here
I'm out on my own, I'm so far from home
And I wish you were here
When I'm looking back
On the time that we shared
Hope you know you were loved
And that I always cared
I always cared
I know in my heart
That we'll meet again
I know deep inside
This isn't the end
And I wish you were here
How I wish you were here
I'm out on my own
And I wish you were here
Oh, I wish you were here
How I wish you were here
I'm out on my own, I'm so far from home
And I wish you were here
Haley jumped as someone knocked on her car window. She picked up her head and looked at the window and looked at the young man standing there. She knew this guy; his name is Quim Martell. Haley rolled down her window.
"Mrs. James-Scott, are you okay?" Quim asked.
"Yeah, I'm fine," Haley said.
"What are you doing here?" Quim asked.
"Waiting for my husband," Haley said, "What are you doing here?"
"I work here, Mrs. James-Scott," Quim said, "Nice song."
Haley nodded, "Yeah, I was listening to another song, and this came after," she said.
"Oh, what song?" Quim asked.
"Li di die," Haley said.
"Mhmm, your son sang on it, didn't he?" Quim asked.
"Yes, he did," Haley said.
"He really gave her the rub as you say but doing that song with her," Quim said.
Haley nodded, "Yeah, he did," she said softly.
"Why did Mental Lapse leave your label?" Quim asked.
"We dropped them," Haley said.
"Why? That's cold, your son's band," Quim said.
Haley sighed, "It was because of Brian's behavior and them losing shows," she said.
"So, it was a business decision?" Quim asked.
"Neither side was," Haley paused, "Neither of us was benefitting from the relationship."
"Is that why Kat Hartmann left Mental Lapse?" Quim asked.
"It was creative differences; she didn't feel her partnership with Brian wasn't beneficial anymore," Haley said.
"Seems so basic a reason to give up on your baby," Quim said.
"You have to remember, they weren't even twenty when this all happened," Haley said, her voice getting distant.
"Bad choices of youth?" Quim asked.
"Possible," Haley said, still quiet.
"So, how did Kat end up back on the label?" Quim asked.
"She joined Nordwind just as we signed them," Haley said.
"Sorry, is this causing you pain, Mrs. James-Scott?" Quim asked.
Haley nodded, "There's a lot of unsaid things there," she said.
"Maybe, you should say them," Quim said.
"Maybe," Haley said.
"Well, I have to head to work," Quim said.
"Okay," Haley said.
"We'll be in touch, Mrs. James-Scott," Quim said and slowly walked away.
Haley looked at the stereo and shrugged. She leaned back and closed her eyes. So, much time and water have passed since that day Haley and Peyton cut Brian loose. It seems like she is being punished for it now. Haley leaned back in the driver's seat and closed her eyes.
After what seemed like forever, but when she opened her eyes and looked at the clock on the radio. Only a few minutes had passed since she closed her eyes. She was turning towards the passenger seat to see Nathan climbing into the car.
"What's wrong, Hales?" Nathan said as he seated himself in the passenger seat.
"Nothing," Haley said.
"Come on, Hales," Nathan said.
"I'm fine, Nate," Haley said.
Nathan sighed, "Hales, we've been married; how long?" he asked.
"Since we were juniors in high school," Haley said.
"How many things have we been there?" Nathan asked.
"Quite a few, I've lost count," Haley said.
"Do you think I don't know when something is bothering my wife?" Nathan asked.
"No, I don't think you do," Haley said.
"So, what's wrong, Hales?" Nathan asked.
"A song that Brian sang on come on the radio," Haley said.
"That happens a lot," Nathan said.
"I think it's because of why we're here," Haley said.
"Well, that's finished," Nathan said.
"How'd it go?" Haley asked.
"What is there to say? It went as expected," Nathan said.
"Yeah, we've done this before," Haley said.
Nathan checked his watch and looked up to Haley. "Let's head home; Darren should be home soon," he said.
Haley nodded, "Okay," she said, but the car into gear and pulled out.
