Nicole—I'm apologize if I sounded demanding. I just wanted to know that there were at least five people who cared enough to comment in return for my work on this story.

MG (Mediatorgrrl)—Well, I don't know if I'm going to be able to put up two chapters per day because school is starting soon for me and I'll be busy, but I'll try my best.

Emma—Sorry about that. I know it's supposed to be soul, but it was a complete typo and I changed it. Thank you for bring that to my attention.

NayClem—Thank you, that is so sweet.

Just so you so, I have outlined this whole story—so sorry, I'm a complete neat freak—and it is going to end up being eight chapters long—with an ending that I'm sure you're going to hate me for—and with a sequel—that will not make you want to haunt me down and kick my ass.

Oh, and also in the next chapter, you're going to read about that one thing no one knows about "except the guys at the hospital," along with major fluffage, because I don't think the minor amount of fluff in this chapter will be satisfactory to you.

Faded Feelings

Now, I don't want you to think that all reunions are like the ones that you read in books, you know, with the exclamations—Oh, my God! It's so good to see you, I missed you so much!—and the flinging of arms around necks, because they're not.

You would think that I would have so much pent up emotion for this man that I haven't seen in so long and claimed to have loved—and also have claimed to love, as in present tense—but interestingly, I don't. Have any pent up emotions, I mean.

The emotions that have rushed up to my brain?

Yeah, those just sort of reachedmy brainand slide back down to their normal positions. Sort of like that one carnival game. Whatever that one is called. You know, the one where you bang a hammer against this metal plate as hard as you can and this little yellow—or red—thing in a huge thermometer looking object goes up and slides back down?

Yeah, it was sort of like that.

But apparently, I was in the minority—half-ority, really, since there were only two of us to begin with, since Cecelia slipped out the door the moment I walked through it—because the next thing I knew I was being snatched up off the ground by a set of arms and being kissed like there was no tomorrow.

And the first thing that came to my mind was: Wow.

Really, wow.

Seriously. I may not be sure about my feelings towards this guy, but I was sure about one thing: I had missed this.

I had missed being kissed with so much emotion and passion that came straight from the heart and not from a certain part of the male anatomy.

I had also missed those lips, those soft, soft lips.

And also that body.

Honestly, you do not want me to start talking about that body and those abs. Trust me.

While what Mary said may have been truethat he had been in misery without mehe certainly hadn't slacked off when it came to the phsyical health department, because those washboard abs were every bit as hard as I had remembered them to be.

Then I felt those calloused fingers creepingfor a loss of a less cliché verbup my blousea blouse, that may I mention, had sat through not one, but two sweaty plane rides. Talk about disgustingand dip into my bra...

And then I felt it. Another thing that was hard besides his absoh, and pecs. You know, that part of the male anatomy that I was talking about earlier.

Yeah...

So I pushed him away. Not because I wasn't enjoying it. Oh, I was enjoying every single part of it.

But it wouldn't be right, becauseI don't know if I loved him anymore.

Now that I come to think ofit, itsort of went how I planned it to be, actually. You know, how I wanted to see him just to prove that I didn't love him anymore.

Except instead of feeling I am so over him, I felt confused.

You know how people always talk about mixed feelings? Yeah, I had that plus faded feelings.

What I felt towards Rob was a little bit of every emotion. I didn't have any strong emotions towards this guy. Not anymore.

"Rob, we need to talk," I said, after I caught my breath. It's no joke being kissed for a long period of time. It's really sort of like running. You know, you run for a mile and then you need a little cool downtime to walkso that your muscles won't feel so sore.

I motioned for him to sit down beside me on the couch.

He nodded and sat.

"Look, Rob. I went to look for you in Indiana, because I wanted to get over you," okay, starting a little too harshly, don't you think, Jess? "not because I wanted to get back with you."

He winced.

Okay, two malevolent comments in a row, not a very pleasing way to start a conversation. Really. I didn't know if I loved the guy anymore, but I didn't want to hurt him.

"I'll admit that what we had seven years ago was great. There is no denying it. But we went seperate paths. We didn't want the same thing."

Rob just looked at me. Expressionless.

Oh, come on. Give me something to work off of, will you?

"But sometimes I can't help wondering what would have happened if we hadn't broke up," I said, honestly not understanding where I was getting at with this.

So I turned the spotlight over to himor as the AV geeks from high school would say backstage "point the cameraat angle 4A!"by saying, "Now, you go."

He swallowed and sucked in a breath of air. "As you said before, we wanted different things, but that was before. But now it's different."

I gave him a questioning look.

"Because I'm willing to do whatever you want to win you back."

Oh, wow. Oof.

I smiled at him. "You have no idea how great it would have been to hear those words seven years ago. But now it's different." I said, quoting off of him. "Everything's different. I'm different. My feelings for you have faded dramatically to the point that even I don't understand what I feel about you."

Really, since when had I became the cold blooded beast? I swear, that is so not how it was supposed to come out.

And Rob had let me know just how cold I was and how muchhewas hurt by what I had said.

Oh, no. Not by telling me so or anything, although that would have made me feel a lot less guilty.

No. He just looked at me. Yes, just looked at me with the saddest pair of eyes. Those foggy blue eyes.

That's when I knew I had done it. I am a terrible person.

So I tried to fix it. "You have to understand that this type of stuff takes time, but I'm willing to try to fall in love with you again, but everything is up to you." I grinned. "Time to turn your charm on, mister."

He smiled back at me.

But the next thing that I said made his smile dissappear. I know, I am totally going to hell. "But we're going to set a time frame. I don't know about you, but I personally do not like to dawdle upon matters that I have been dawdling upon for the past seven years, because if thisyou and mewasn't meant to be, Iweneed to move on with our lives."

Rob nodded reluctantly.

"So, does two months sound good to you?"

His beautiful face crumpled in distaste. "Two months. Mastriani. . ." But after receiving a hey-I'm-not-the-one-who-wants-to-get-back-together look from me, he said, "Okay. Two months it is."

After a moment of silence, he asked, "Kiss to seal the deal?"

I laughed and replied, "Okay." And leaned in to give him a quick peck on the lips, and then turned it into a hug.

Suddenly,I remembered something. Somethingquite important. Iwhispered into his right ear, "You still own me something."

He pulled back and asked, "What's that?"

"You still haven't told me that you love me."

He ran a hand through his hair. Nervous gestures. Omenous. Very omenous sign indeed. I would do the "thoughful chin" thing, but that may seem a bit odd.

"Mastriani, I can't"

I cut him off. Men and their excuses. I swear.

"Forget it, okay? Start unpacking your stuff in the guest room," I gestured to the room right next to mine, "and what do you do now?"

Rob, seeming surprised by the question, asked, "What do I do now?"

I looked up at him, "Yeah, what's your job? Occupation?"

"Oh, got into medicine after you left. I work as a first year ophthalmologist up at the Riley Hospital in Indianapolis." (a/n: I'm sorry, but I have no idea how long eye training takes, but please just bear with me on this)

I was impressed. Rob, medical school. Really? But the title Dr. Wilkins does sound so great.

"Huh. I can go talk to some of the guys at the office. I think Johnson's son is the department head for eye at the city hospital. I can try to get you an on-call doctor job for these two months, since I have a job, too, and you won't be able to exactly help me or anything," I informed him as I stood up to call Krantz to say that I would back to work by the next day.

"What is it?" He wanted to know.

"FBI agent," I told him. Guiltily, may I add.

Rob nodded and seemed to take it in pretty well. Better than my family did when they found out, anyway.

"I'll see you in the morning," I told him, since it was about nine and there was going to be a long day at work tomorrow—a two hour questioning from Cecelia comes to mind—and headed to my room.

"Jess?" he called out, just as I was about to enter my room. "I just want you to know that my feelings for you haven't change throughout all these years, and that they never will."

I nodded. I know, Rob. I thought to myself I can see it in your eyes.


What do you think? Too much dialogue. Need a bit more narration? Whatever it is, please tell me. I'm open to anything, suggestings, criticism, etc. Please just tell me what you think, because I need to know so that I could make this story more enjoyable to my readers.

Heidi