Chapter Nine

"Yes, ma'am . . . alright . . . okay, see ya then." Jack hung up the phone and looked at Ennis, seated across the desk from him. Afternoon light streamed in the office window, making it bright in a way that didn't extend to the two men.

"Well, what'd she say?"

Jack ran his hands through his hair and let out an exasperated sigh. "Said she got a call. An anonymous call 'bout Bobby an' him livin' here with two men. I know what anonymous means. It means fuckin' L.D. Newsome. Goddamn that man t'hell!" Jack's voice was laced with barely controlled anger. He looked up at Ennis, his eyes dark. "She's comin' over tomorrow, after I get home from my class."

"Tomorrow? Jesus, Jack, can't she come next week when the girls ain't here? Alma's likely t'have a fit if'n she knew a social worker come by."

"No, she wouldn't wait, Ennis. Anyway, what's the big fuckin' deal? We ain't doin' nothin' wrong an' she can't say we are."

"Jack, are you livin' in some kinda dream world? Most a' the rest of the country thinks what we're doin' is wrong. Or have ya forgotten? And she c'n say whatever the hell she wants. What if she hates who we are?"

Jack looked at Ennis. He'd started out angry and was ready to lash out, until that last part. The anger was quickly replaced by a feeling he couldn't even describe, but it brought a lump to his throat. Ennis was staring out the window, his jaw clenched tight. When Jack didn't respond for some time, he finally looked at him and saw the too-bright look in his eyes.

"What? What's the matter with you, Jack?"

"You. You just said 'who we are'. It's the first time I've heard ya say something like that, Ennis, admitting it out loud."

"Admitting what? What're ya talkin' about?"

Jack's good feeling slipped a little. Baby steps, Jack, remember, he's takin' baby steps. "Who we are. Me 'n you. Together. Queer. Gay."

Ennis just looked at him, then got up and walked out, his jaw clenched so tight Jack thought it might break. It wasn't exactly what Jack expected.


Ennis went out to the yard and kicked at the ground, his hands on his hips, cursing to himself. Finally, he was aware that a car had pulled in the driveway. It was a station wagon. Christ, who's this now? he thought, but wiped the scowl off his face, or so he hoped, and approached the car.

"Hello!" A tall, thin woman with dark blond hair, hanging loose and curly around her face, got out and waved to him. She looked to be in her early forties and had a pretty face. It was Ellen McIntyre, Danny's mom. "Hi, Ennis, how are you?" She smiled at him and he just looked at her for a moment, before remembering his manners. He nodded and said hello.

"Danny said your daughters are here visiting and that they're about my girls ages. I wanted to invite you all to a barbeque at our house tomorrow night. My girls are kinda shy, so they don't want to come over before they have a proper introduction."

That got a smile out of Ennis. Imagine, someone from this family being shy? After knowing Danny and his talkative mom, he found it hard to believe.

"Well, ma'am, I'll have t'talk t'Jack about it. Would ya like t'come in, have some lemonade?"

"Sure, for a minute, I guess." She smiled brightly and followed him inside. He got each of them a glass and invited her to sit at the table while he went to talk to Jack.

As he went up the stairs, he remembered the way he'd left Jack, just a few minutes ago, and now felt a bit of shame creep into his heart. He stopped at the office door and peered in before entering. Jack was seated at the desk, facing away from the door, staring out the window. Ennis went to him, knelt in front of the chair, and put his arms around Jack's waist. Jack was startled for a moment, but then returned the embrace and pulled Ennis close. "I'm sorry, Jack," Ennis mumbled into his chest.

"I know."

"I don' know what gets inta me sometimes."

"Jus' takes time, cowboy." Pause. "I'm sorry that social worker's gotta come when the girls are here. She sounded real nice, though."

"I hope she is." Another long pause.

Finally, Ennis pulled back and cleared his throat. "Danny's mom is here. She invited us fer a barbeque tomorrow night. You wanna go?"

"So that's what brought ya up here. Here I thought ya was just feelin' guilty." Jack pulled back from Ennis and started to stand up, an edge of anger to his voice.

"Jack, wait. That's true, but, I woulda come up here anyway. I am sorry. I know this is a hard thing t'happen right now, 'specially when we're just startin' out." He took hold of Jack's shirt with both hands and pulled him forward, kissed him gently.

Jack held back for a moment, then relaxed and kissed him back. He took Ennis's hands in each of his and clasped them tight, broke the kiss, and pressed his forehead to Ennis's. "D'you wanna go t'the McIntyres?"

"Well . . . I'm not sure. But it might be fun an' they got a coupla girls my girls' ages, according t'Ellen."

"Okay, then. I think we should go. She in the kitchen?" At Ennis's nod, he stood up, as did Ennis, and they both went downstairs. The McIntyres might be a little scatter-brained, in Ennis's opinion, but they also had a good reputation. Ellen was on the school board and the family was active in the community.

Ellen stood up as they approached. "Jack, it's so nice to see you again. I've been meaning to invite you all over for ages, but we get so busy in the spring, planting and all. We put in a big garden. But Danny sure has found a kindred spirit in your son, Jack. And he's such a nice boy, so well-mannered! I've told Danny he should pay attention and pick up a few pointers!" she laughed.

"Now, don't say that. Danny's always been real polite when he's over. I'm glad Bobby was able t'make a friend so close. And I'm, well, me and Ennis both, are real glad you and your husband let Danny spend time here with us."

She smiled at Jack and then looked at Ennis, who could've sworn she winked at him. "I knew James Del Mar and he was a fine man, which speaks well for you, but everyone has to prove themselves a good person. I can tell about people, I've got good intuition, and I like you. Both of you."

Ennis gave her a real smile, for the first time. "What should we bring tomorrow?"

"Oh, don't bring anything–we'll have plenty. Maybe you can have us over soon and repay the favor?"

"O' course we will!" Jack said, smiling brightly.

"All right, see you all tomorrow," she said, going out the door.

Ennis looked at Jack and Jack looked back. A barbeque with the McIntyres seemed like an unexpected gift.


The girls were at the jukebox, picking out songs, Bobby was in the kitchen visiting grandma Alice, and Jack and Ennis were seated at a cozy table by the fireplace at Willow Bay, the restaurant where Alice worked. It was dimly lit, mostly by candles on the tables and soft lights lining the walls. They were in the dining room, but there was also a large dance floor, and a separate room that had pool tables and a bar in it. It was quiet in the supper club, being a weeknight, but as they sat talking quietly and waiting for the kids, both Jack and Ennis became aware of a commotion in the bar. The girls were closer to the bar, so they turned to look in the door, then looked at Ennis. He motioned them back to the table.

"What's goin' on, Daddy?" Junior asked.

"I dunno, darlin'. Prob'ly someone had too much t'drink an' don' wanna leave."

"Speakin' a leavin', maybe we ought t'be gettin' home," Jack said. "Franny, you wanna go in the kitchen an' retrieve Bobby. Thanks, sweetheart," he said, as she nodded and headed to the kitchen.

While they were waiting, the outside door opened and someone came in. He was tall, dark, and had long hair that hung loose and flowed down his shoulders. Ennis squinted his eyes in the faint light. He seemed familiar. He disappeared into the bar.

"Hey, Ennis, wasn't that Tyler?" Jack asked, echoing his thought.

"Yeah, I think it was."

"Wonder what he's doin' here?" A few moments, and a little more commotion later, they knew. He came out of the bar, holding up an older man, who was almost falling-down drunk.

"Pu' me dow', boy. I c'n walk b'myshelf," he slurred, dragging his feet. "Jusss wan' one more."

"No, dad, I think you've had enough," Tyler said, practically dragging him to the door. He didn't look up until he got there, where he scanned the room before he ducked out. Just as he was about to leave, he met Ennis's eyes. Ennis couldn't see him clearly, but he knew, somehow, that Tyler was burning up, ashamed of being seen like this. Ennis felt like he should do or say something, but didn't, and then Tyler was gone.

"Shit," Jack said slowly, shaking his head.

Ennis didn't say anything.


Ennis curled around Jack. They'd been in bed for a while, but neither was sleeping. Jack was worried about tomorrow and what it would bring. Ennis was thinking of Tyler and his dad; how little they knew of him and what his life was really like.

"Ya know, Jack," Ennis started, knowing Jack wasn't sleeping yet, "I don' think I realized that things are tough all over. I mean, things was hard in Wyoming, and this farm still seems like a dream t'me, but there's people here, have it hard like I did back there." They'd learned that Tyler and his dad lived in the poor, sad town they'd passed on their way to Goosedown. They'd also gotten the distinct feeling that there was serious discrimination against American Indians in the area, some of it under the surface and some quite overt.

"Thinkin' a Tyler?"

"Yeah."

"He's a nice guy. I like 'im."

"Me too."

They were quiet again. This time Jack started, "Ennis, I gotta be honest. I'm worried. L.D. threatened me with gettin' Bobby afore I left Texas. I thought he'd let it go, but now I ain't so sure. What . . . what if he takes him away from me?"

Ennis heard the fear and hurt in Jack's voice. He pulled him tighter, wishing he could take that feeling away, but knowing that he couldn't. He was fairly well acquainted with that feeling himself. "Try not t' worry about it, darlin'. You're a great daddy and Bobby adores ya; anyone c'n see that."

"I'm tryin', but it's hard." He turned to face Ennis, their arms and legs wrapped around each other. Ennis leaned forward and met Jack's lips, kissed him long and deeply.

"Maybe I c'n take yer mind off it fer a little while," he whispered.

Jack kissed him back, then said against his lips, "What'd ya have in mind, cowboy?"

Ennis put his hands under Jack's t-shirt and began working it up, his hands on Jack's stomach, then his chest. He felt Jack's indrawn breath when he touched a nipple with his fingers. Ennis broke the kiss to pull the t-shirt over his head, then went back to worshiping Jack's lips with his own, before whispering, "Just a little sweetness."

Jack put his hands under Ennis's t-shirt and repeated the process of pushing it up. He was rewarded with a low moan, almost a purr, from Ennis when their skin came together with nothing between them. Ennis rolled Jack onto his back and leaned over, holding himself up on one arm. They had only slept in this bed, with just some kissing, since the girls had arrived. Ennis realized that he'd been holding back and Jack had honored that. Somehow, tonight, this fact only increased his ardor and he met Jack's lips with more fervor, exploring Jack's mouth with his tongue while caressing his chest and stomach with his free hand.

Jack's hands were occupied with the smooth skin under Ennis's pajama bottoms, caressing and massaging. He arched up to meet him, grinding their hips together, then wrapped one leg around behind Ennis, bringing them closer for a moment.

Ennis moved his hand down between them, underneath Jack's pajama bottoms, down his thigh, feeling the soft, sensitive skin on the inside, and moving up between his legs, to caress the soft heaviness first and then the hard shaft. Jack moaned and whispered Ennis's name in his mouth.

Ennis brought his hand to Jack's face, caressed his cheek, then drew back to devour him with his eyes. He met his lips again and whispered Jack's name back into his own mouth, then moved down to kiss his neck and that sweet spot beneath his jawline that he loved to taste.

Jack was drowning in his desire. He moved his hands down to push Ennis's pajama bottoms off and then helped Ennis get his own off. Ennis settled between his legs, which Jack wrapped around him, then arched up as Ennis entered him. They surged together for a few moments, before Ennis lifted Jack's legs to rest on his shoulders allowing him to thrust deeper and harder. "God, Ennis . . ." Jack reached for Ennis's thighs and hung on.

A few more thrusts and Ennis slowed down, kissed each of Jack's ankles before moving them off his shoulders, moved down to feel Jack's chest against his again, met his mouth, tasted the sweetness of Jack's breath as they breathed into one another, felt Jack's hands digging into his back, trying to hang on tighter, trying to get closer, until he couldn't tell where he ended and Jack began.

Ennis felt lightheaded as he reached the peak, but held back, waiting for Jack. He could feel Jack's erection, hard between their bodies, felt Jack's urgent thrusting. He met Jack's eyes in the moonlight, felt himself swimming in them, losing himself in those deep blue pools, darkened with desire, and then he knew Jack was ready. They came together, urgent and sweet, eyes locked and filled with love. Ennis collapsed on Jack, breathing heavy, too sated to move. When Ennis finally rolled off him, Jack turned with him, arms and legs still wrapped around each other.

"Think ya c'n sleep now, darlin'?" Ennis asked.

"Mmm . . ." Jack sighed, a contented smile on his lips. "Think so," he said softly.


The next morning Tyler showed up for work, same as usual. He didn't say anything about the night before and neither did Ennis. Once Ennis told Tyler and the other two farmhands what needed to get done that day, he took the girls and Bobby into town for brunch and a stop at the feed store and hardware store for supplies. When they got back to the farm, he took them swimming in their lake. Junior had gone back to being herself with her dad, for the most part. He suspected that it had a lot to do with the fact that Jack was gone all morning and early afternoon. When Jack was home, Junior was quiet again.

Right now, Junior was sitting next to him on a towel, while Franny and Bobby tried to catch minnows with the little nets he'd bought them at the hardware store. Every once in a while one or the other would squeal, show the net with the something silvery wiggling in it, and then let it go.

"You don' wanna go help catch minnows, Junior?" Ennis smiled at her.

"Well, Daddy, seems they're havin' a great time, but no, I don't," she said dryly, then smiled up at him.

"You ready fer school next year? What grade are ya gonna be in?"

She rolled her eyes at him, "I ain't ready fer school, Daddy. Geez, it's the beginning o'summer. And I'm gonna be in the seventh grade."

"Oh, yeah, sorry sweetheart, I fergot."

"It's okay."

He was looking right at her face when the stony look came over it, hearing Jack's voice coming down the trail. "Ennis? Ennis!" He appeared through the trees. "Hey, what're you guys doin'? Ms. Peterson's gonna be here any minute." He looked flustered and a little wild in his eyes.

"Sorry, Jack. I guess we lost track 'o time."

Jack didn't respond to him, just called out, "Bobby, come on. We gotta get back t'the house."

"Ah, Daddy, me 'n Franny are catchin' minnows. I wanna catch one an' show ya."

"Maybe later, Bobby. Come on."

Bobby's shoulder's slumped, but he obeyed, followed by Franny. Jack wrapped Bobby in a towel and started back towards the house.

Franny wrapped herself in a towel and slipped her sandals on. "Daddy, how come Jack's so cranky?"

Ennis thought about reminding her to be respectful, but realized she was right. "He's just a little worried, honey, and sometimes when we're worried we sound cranky."

She thought about it for a minute, then said, "Junior must be worried all the time lately."

"Hey! That ain't true!" Junior exclaimed.

"All right, girls, behave now."

They followed Jack and Bobby to the house. Junior went right in to her room, without a word to anyone. Franny asked for a snack, but Ennis told her she had to get dressed first.

Jack stood in the living room, looking out the window that faced the driveway. Ennis could feel the anxiety pouring off him. Kelly was out in the garden and the kids were all in their rooms changing, so Ennis approached Jack and put his arm around his back, ran his hand up and down it, trying to soothe him. Jack turned his eyes to Ennis, the blue softened now to the color of the sky. "Sorry fer being such an ass back there," he said softly.

Ennis smiled at him, "You're fergiven. I guess you get ta take a turn bein' the ass once in a while. I certainly take my turn often enough." Jack smiled at that, relaxed for a moment, then tensed again as he saw the car in the driveway.

Jack yelled for Bobby and went to the door. Ennis recognized the young, blond woman as the social worker who'd stopped in two days before. The three children appeared and Jack introduced them to Janie. She looked surprised to see the girls and looked at Ennis. "These are your daughters? Do they live here with you?"

"No, they live with their momma in Wyoming, but they're here visiting this week."

They gave her a tour of the house and the farm. Janie laughed and joked with all of them and didn't show any disgust or contempt, which Jack was truly afraid would happen. He relaxed and became his charming self in short order. Ennis was still tense, but tried to hide it. After she talked with all of them for a while, she asked to talk to Jack alone. Jack sent the kids out to the garden with Kelly, but told Ennis with his eyes that he was staying.

"Jack, Ennis," she looked at each of them in turn, "I haven't seen anything that gives me any concerns. You have a nice house, it's clean and well-taken care of; the children look fine and healthy; they're obviously comfortable here with you. I don't have any concerns," she said.

"I hear a 'but' coming," Jack said.

She looked down, almost as if she didn't want to say more. "You're right, Jack. I have to be honest with you. My supervisor is more old-fashioned than I am and has expressed concerns. Now, I'm going to put in a good word for you, but I may need to visit a few more times."

Jack and Ennis looked at each other, exchanged barely perceptible shrugs. This had gone better than they'd hoped. If she wanted to visit them, that was fine, so Jack told her so. "You come out any time ya want. Maybe next time we c'n get ya up on a horse."

Janie laughed, "Oh, I don't know about that! I've never ridden a horse before."

Ennis looked shocked and shook his head, a small smile playing at the edge of his mouth. "That's just sad, little lady. Anytime you wanna try, you just come on back."

"Maybe," she said, smiling at him. "Now, I better get going. I hear you're going to some big barbeque tonight." Bobby and Franny had filled her ear for quite a while about it. Jack and Ennis walked her to the door and watched her drive away. Before her car even disappeared around the corner, Ennis felt Jack's hand take his. He squeezed it gently, running his thumb over Jack's knuckles, before raising it to his mouth and kissing where his thumb had been.