Chapter Seventeen

Ennis woke up after his restless night, feeling like he'd been run over by a truck. He rolled over into the middle of the bed. Jack had already gotten up, apparently. Ennis lay there for a while, thinking; when he finally pulled back the blanket and got out of bed, he had a secret smile on his face. He went in the bathroom, turned on the water, and stepped under the spray, still lost in his thoughts. He stood under the water, looking up, letting it wash over his face, and nearly jumped out of his skin when he felt arms go around his waist.

"Jesus Christ, Jack! You take years offa my life when ya startle me like that!" he exclaimed, turning around to face him.

"I can't help it that you're always so deep in thought lately." Jack took the soap and worked up a lather. "Turn back around, I'll wash yer back."

Ennis obliged him, putting his hands against the wall and resting there. Jack's hands slipped all over his back and then went lower as he stepped closer. His hands slid in front and he ran them over the flat planes of Ennis's stomach, then up to his chest and shoulders and back down. Ennis put his hands over Jack's as they moved over his body. Jack leaned forward and rained kisses down his spine. Each place his lips touched felt like cold fire to Ennis.

Jack stood up and was flush against his back. Ennis could feel the hardening of his erection nudging up to him, between his legs, and felt his own cock stiffen. He turned and pulled Jack to him, closing his eyes against the water pouring over their faces. He tasted Jack and water as they slid together, bodies silky with soap. His eyes closed against the water, he could only feel and taste Jack. Everything about him felt familiar and yet, not. The taste of Jack was diluted by the water, which made him want to taste more. His tongue scraped against Jack's; his arms strained to pull him closer, their thighs were pressed together, muscles flexing, and where their abdomens met, it felt fluttery and hot.

Suddenly, he needed Jack. The need to be inside him was so strong he almost fell to his knees. He broke the kiss and turned Jack around. Jack braced himself against the shower wall with one hand and reached back for Ennis with the other. Just as suddenly as the other feeling, Ennis felt a reverence come over him. He pushed in, exquisitely slow, his arms around Jack and pulling him close. He felt Jack's warmth surround him and felt like he was home. Jack's name on his lips, so soft, so desperate, sounded like the beating of an angel's heart. He took Jack's hardness into his hand, leaned close enough to put his cheek to Jack's back. Jack arched into him and they moved together, as one being. They came together, with soft whispers. Jack turned around and Ennis took him in his arms and kissed his lidded eyes, his nose, his cheeks, and finally, those perfect lips, which parted for his tongue. He tasted, for just a moment, before pulling away and turning off the water.

Ennis took Jack's hand and led him to the bed, where they fell in, still damp, their bodies pressed close, their arms around each other, and their legs tangled together. They dozed languidly for a few minutes.

More awake, Ennis kissed Jack, slow and deep, nibbled on his bottom lip, before pulling back, "Where is ever'body?"

"Kelly went grocery shopping and the guys are out fixin' the north fence where that tree fell on it. They'll be gone fer a while."

"Ya didn't go with 'em?"

"Nope, I had plans." He grinned and leaned in for another deep kiss.

"Mmm . . . I was layin' in bed thinkin' o' plans o' my own."

"Yeah?"

"Uh huh." Ennis kissed his mouth, under his jaw, up to his ear, where he whispered, "Figured we'd be the only ones here t'night. Should take advantage of it."

Jack smiled and arched his neck for Ennis to continue kissing, "Seems like we got a good head start on it."

"Mmhmm . . ." Ennis was kissing his way down Jack's body, stopping every few inches to suck and lick. He got to his belly button and licked a circle around it.

"God, Ennis . . ."

"Want me t'stop?"

"Nooo . . .don't . . . stop. Aahhh . . ." his hips bucked as Ennis's tongue flicked out to touch the tip of his cock. He took the head in his mouth and swirled his tongue around it, sucking gently. He looked up and met Jack's eyes as he took the entire length in his mouth. Jack's eyes rolled back in his head as another moan escaped him. Ennis pulled his mouth off, then licked from the root to the tip, then did the same thing on each side. His own cock was aching, feeling Jack squirm under him, driving him crazy with the noises he made. He took Jack's length in his mouth again and felt him arch under him. He licked and sucked and explored with his tongue, reveling in Jack's reaction.

"Ennis . . . Ennis . . . god . . . I can't, don't stop, oh god . . ." his hips bucked and he let go; Ennis took it all in, then rested his head on Jack's stomach while Jack caught his breath.

"Come'ere," Jack said, reaching for him. He crawled back up until his head was next to Jack's. Jack turned toward him and met his lips as he put his hand down and took hold, starting a gentle stroking. Ennis met his lips fiercely, his hands tangled in Jack's hair, he pushed into Jack's hand, gently, at first, then more urgently. He came with a shudder a few moments later, unable to hold out very long.

They lay in bed, spent and dozing again, before Jack propped himself on one arm and looked down into Ennis's eyes. "I love you," he said, running his fingers through Ennis's curls.

Ennis lost himself in the blue. He reached up and touched Jack's cheek. "I love you, too, darlin'."


"Hello, little mother."

Alice opened the door and smiled at Tyler and his use of the nickname he'd given her long ago. He dipped down and put one arm around her in a gentle hug and kissed the top of her head.

"Is Kelly home?"

"No, she went to a movie with Janie Peterson."

Tyler sat down at the table and Alice perched on the edge of her chair across from him. "What brings you by tonight?"

"I just wanted to talk to you."

"Sounds serious. Serious talk needs tea to go with it." She put some water in the kettle and got out a ceramic teapot, put some leaves in it, and set two mugs next to it, then put some cookies on a plate and brought it to the table. "How's your dad?"

"Oh, you know," he looked away. "Steve left, so dad said I could move back in. I wish there was something I could do to help him, but he won't let me. Sometimes I think I make it worse by being there with him. It hurts him, being around me, because of . . ." he trailed off, but she understood.

"Tyler, your dad may not be able to admit it, but he loves you. He needs you to take care of him, until he can take care of himself again. Some of that hurt he feels is his own guilt, for not being a better father and for keeping you from going to college. He needs to let it go."

"I don't think that's ever going to happen."

She put her hand on top of his. "Don't say that. You never know what the future will bring. Know what else?" He looked at her, a question in his eyes. "Your dad is proud of you. He still talks about how smart you are and how hard you work. I really believe part of his hurt comes from guilt. He knows you should have gone to college and would have, if it weren't for him. Sometimes I wonder if it wouldn't be best for him if you just went. Just left to go to college. For yourself and your dad."

"Alice, I can't leave him like he is now."

"Do you still want to go to college?"

"Yes. You know I do. I still want to become an attorney. I want to help my people."

"I know you do, honey. Maybe you should tell your dad that. He thinks you've given up on that dream."

"I did. I don't know how it will ever work out."

"It won't, with that attitude. You keep that dream alive and make sure to tell your dad about it."

"All right," he agreed, unsure about it, but unable to deny her.

"Tea's ready," she said, as the teakettle started to whistle. She filled the teapot and put the cover on to let it steep.

"Now, I don't think you came here to talk about your dad and college. What else is going on, Tyler?"

He didn't answer at first and when he finally did, he didn't meet her eyes. "Have you ever been in love? I mean, with someone you couldn't have?" he asked, his voice soft.

Alice stood and poured their tea. "It's mint, from my garden. Do you want some honey for it?" He shook his head. She put a dollop of honey in her tea and stirred slowly. "I haven't been in love for a long time, Tyler, but I remember the feeling. There's nothing like it." She looked at him closely, her intuition strong, "Is it one of those boys that run the farm?"

"Yes," he said softly. "Ennis."

"Does he know how you feel? Does he have feelings for you?"

"Maybe, I don't know. Once, I thought I saw something, in his eyes, but I'm not sure. We talked a little. He said whatever we got between us we have to put aside. But we never even talked about what was between us." He put his head in his hands. "Alice, I don't know what to do." He lowered his hands. "I should quit working for them, but I love the farm, I love working there. James was almost like a father to me. I don't want to leave it."

"You're gonna have to put this thing with Ennis in the back of your mind, then. Can you do that?"

He stared at his mug for a long time, as if looking for answers in the tea or the blue onion pattern on the mug. Finally, he looked up and met her eyes. "He asked me almost the same thing. Yes, I think I can. I'm going to try."

"I guess that's all you can do, then, besides leaving. Have you thought about talking to Ennis some more?"

"No, I guess not. I figured we were all done talking about it."

"Maybe you should try that. Just get it all out and then go on from there."

He looked up, his eyes miserable. "What if it makes things worse?"

"Honey, do you think you could feel any worse than you do now?"

"I don't know . . ."

"Think about it." Alice filled their mugs again and they sat in the silence for a while before she asked, "Does Kelly know any of this?"

"I don't think so, why?"

"I don't think she wants to give up hope that someday you'll fall in love with her," Alice smiled gently.

"I wish I could. It would make everything so much easier and she'd be happy. You know I love her, but not in the way she wants me to. She's like a little sister."

"I know you do." She patted his hand. "So does she, in her heart."

"I should go." Tyler stood up and drew her into a hug. "Thank you, little mother. I love you, too, you know."

She laughed softly. "I know you do, honey. And I love you. Come back again soon. Maybe bring your dad next time." She watched him get in his car and drive away, her heart aching for him.


Jack walked into the barn and Ennis knew something was wrong. He latched Brownie's gate and started towards Jack.

"Ennis, I gotta fly t'Texas. My house finally sold an' I gotta sign the paperwork. If I go now, I c'n be back before Bobby comes home an' afore ya leave t'pick up the girls."

Ennis let out a breath he didn't know he was holding. "Ya scared me, there, bud. Thought something serious happened."

Jack smiled, "It is serious! I don' wanna go down there, but it'll be a relief to have it all taken care of and done. 'Sides, the money'll come in handy. I was thinkin' we should get a car or one o' those trucks with the back seat. You know, fer when the girls are here, so we can all ride t'gether if'n we wanna go somewhere."

Ennis thought for a minute. "That is a good idea, Jack. But, it's your money, so it's up t'you."

"No, it ain't my money. It's ours, just like the farm, and ever'thing else."

"When ya leavin'?"

"In just a few minutes. Already started packing. Got a flight from Duluth."

"You want me t'drive ya?"

"No, I'll just take my truck an' leave it there. Gonna be back early Saturday morning."

They walked back to the house together. In their bedroom, Ennis saw that Jack had a small suitcase out, with some clothes in it. Jack was in the bathroom getting his toothbrush and razor, which he added into the suitcase. Ennis reached for his hand and pulled him close. "I'm gonna miss you, darlin'." His lips met Jack's gently.

"Mmm . . . me too." Jack said, before kissing him again.

"You be careful while yer there."

"I will." He chuckled low. "Works out jus' perfect that L.D. is here in Minnesota when I halfta go down there. I was afraid he might try somethin' when I had ta go down an' take care o' the house."

"He could still try somethin'. I sure don't trust him."

"Me neither, but I don't think he'll do anything now, while he's fightin' me in court."

"I hope yer right, Jack."

Jack kissed him again, then closed his suitcase and they went out to the truck. Ennis watched him leave, overwhelmed by a feeling of unease.


The wind blew and Janie felt the motion move through her. This was her favorite spot in the whole house, here on the porch in the wooden swing that was lined with a comfy cushion and pillows. The house she rented in Goosedown was small, but it was in a nice, quiet neighborhood, and the house was cozy. She was curled up on the swing, reading a book and was just about dozing off when she heard the roar of a motorcycle in front of her house. She sat up and saw a red, black, and chrome Yamaha motorcycle parked there, with a man in a helmet, worn jeans, and a black leather jacket on it. She set her book down, cautious, but curious. When the helmet came off, blonde curls spilled out from underneath it and the smile that met her was filled with joy and mischief. Janie squealed and leapt down the steps and into his arms.

"Beau! You came! Why didn't you call me and tell me you were coming?"

"And miss this sight–you so full of joy and happiness? No way." He pulled her close and said softly, "I missed you."

"I missed you, too."

"Well, come on, tell me how you are," she tugged his hand and pulled him up the steps.

"I hope you were serious when you offered to let me stay with you."

"Of course I was!"

"I'm hoping to find a job. Doesn't have to be anything great, just something to get by."

"You don't have to worry about that tonight."

"How are mom and dad?"

His face clouded the tiniest bit. "Oh, you know, same as always."

"Dad still trying to get you to join the army?"

"I think he takes it as some kind of personal insult that I missed the draft for Vietnam. He's just plain pissed that I haven't signed up. I'm sick of fighting with him."

Janie got them each a bottle of pepsi from the refrigerator and popped the tops off. "Are you hungry? Want me to make you a sandwich or something?"

"Sure."

She made his favorite sandwich, bologna, cheese, mayonnaise, and lettuce, while he told her about his trip from California to Minnesota. She was both surprised and not surprised to see him. Beau was her older brother, by a year, and her best friend. Their father was a military man and they moved a lot. All those moves brought brother and sister closer together, especially when it became clear that Beau was not going to follow in their father's footsteps. He was a free spirit, an artist, and had a sensitive nature that their father did not approve of.

Beau finished his sandwich and got his overstuffed saddlebags from the bike. Janie settled him into the second bedroom in the house and wished him a good night, her heart happy that he was here with her.