I HATE Reira's English voice. HATE IT! HATE IT!
T-T And Victoream's, too, can't forget about him...
…
…
Hmm. Victoream curses a lot too, and has this particular favorite saying and i'm curious as to what they're gonna make him say in the English version...
Anyway, sorry for the short chapter, but it's a filler and i can't have things happening too quickly, y'know. n.n' The action will start up again soon, i promise.
Disclaimer: I don't own this, otherwise it wouldn't be called FANfiction.
Erased
Chapter 24
Contemplating: Recovery
From where I stood leaning against the wall halfway across the room, there was a faint murmuring sound. The sound slowly drifted from the doorway from my bookkeeper's room but I ignored it completely, keeping myself at a far distance from where the woman was located.
She was crying. I knew that she was. Only a couple of days had passed since the real Sherry had woken up once again and she had barely even left her room. Whenever she did come out, though, she wouldn't even look at me—she acted as if I weren't even in the room. She would wander to wherever it was she came out for but then would eventually go back in her own space.
Though Sherry would come out of her room, I knew that she didn't have the courage to try and leave without me. For one, she still needed me for revenge as I needed her for the battle, and two, if she even dared to try and leave she would have to deal with me first. No way in hell would I let her go so easily.
The soft murmuring of her tears drifted to my ear again and this time I allowed myself to turn my gaze upon her door. One thing again, she hadn't stopped crying, either. For the past two days that was all it truly seemed like she was doing.
I wasn't sure why she was like this, though I had a good idea as to why she hadn't been talking to me. She was still angry about the situation she had found herself in when her true self had finally awoken, she was still furious to know what had happened between us.
But then again, I was rather irritated with myself about that as well. I could not believe that I had done what I had done, to feel such… desire. What's worse was that I knew it was still there, I still craved for her, so I forced myself to meditate more so than usual to try and regain control over myself. It only helped just a little, but the urge to have her for myself was always going to be there, as I soon concluded. Not only that, but it was possible for it to grow even larger…
It was unfortunate but true. I feared that my want would never go away, and from the situation and the level of desire I was feeling now or what I would have in the future, I knew that it wouldn't. All because I was so weak, the old Sherry transformed me into something I had not intended to be, she gave me unnecessary flaws that would wreck who I was. Me, the great Brago of the Makai…
I was now so disgustingly weak!
Though I had to admit it, it was most likely my fault that I was like this. I allowed myself to feel for Sherry, I allowed myself to let the desire kick in—I allowed the weakness to take hold of me.
Damn it.
Glancing to the side, I noticed the newspaper that was thrown to the side on the side table by the couch. I knew that Sherry had read it at some point; I had come out of meditation yesterday and saw my bookkeeper reading it. Only when she realized I was watching her that she went back into her room again without a word. Afterwards, I had taken a look at it myself and wasn't surprised to see what was on it.
Although I couldn't read any of what was written, merely because I didn't understand the language here, I had concluded what it was about, all because of the picture on the front cover. It was the girl from the night before, Hiebie's bookkeeper. Evidentially, the body was found sometime after we had left and nobody knew what had happened. I had no idea if they knew what caused her death, it was possible, but I had no idea. Sherry was the one who could read and understand German, not me.
I stared at the picture of the deceased woman on the front page of the newspaper. It still haunted me, those last words she had said before she died…
"I wish I could be together with someone too…"What the hell did they mean? I had no idea what she was foreshadowing. My desire? Doubt it, but then again, I was never good with this kind of stuff.
But in any rate, whatever it meant, Sherry had to come out of her depressed state sooner or later. I had already been angry at how we were behind on what was going on in the war in the past, but if she were going to stall us even further then I had no idea what I was going to do. It was enraging, really. Not only did I desire her, but I desired many other things as well. And one of those was to win—I had to win this war! I couldn't possibly accomplish this feat if I were behind on everything and weak.
I felt myself clenching my fists and I stopped only to stand up from sitting down on the ground and turning to look out the window. It was night, but I could still see the silhouettes of random humans walking up and down the street. There weren't many, but they were there. A few cars passed by as well and I turned away from the window.
To the side, the door to Sherry's room opened and my bookkeeper herself finally decided to look through. I caught a glimpse of her face before she turned away and walked into the kitchen. Tearstains were seen on her cheeks and her eyes were somewhat red. There was a gloomy air to her as she walked across the room, I silently watched her as she opened the refrigerator, taking out the milk jug only to pour herself a glass.
When she turned around, she stared at me blankly, not giving any signs of emotion. She just… stared. I stared right back and she didn't turn away. Sherry merely stood by the kitchen with the small glass of milk in hand, staring at me.
Finally, I couldn't take it, I snapped, "Are you ever going to speak again?"
Still, she was quiet and I didn't push it further. She turned away and walked into her room again, closing the door behind her. I could hear a small click and I knew that she had locked the door. Tch, I could open it if I wanted to, but I wouldn't, there was no need to. She would get over this and go back to her original self. Besides, I was still forcing myself to calm down as well.
As easy as it sounded, it wasn't, in fact, I felt myself constantly thinking about her. I didn't understand this strange sensation. It was just… there. Nor did I know what to do about it, but I just let it be as I continued to meditate.
With a sigh, I closed my eyes. Tomorrow, if she didn't say anything else, I'd just have to force it out of her.
