Shattered Pieces
Chapter 2 - Tainted Memories
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.
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Sakura's POV
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I awoke at sunrise, finding myself tired from my lack of sleep. That's what I get for staying up all night, unable to sleep, due to my memories of him. I got out of bed and looked into the mirror. My pink hair was a mess, and my emerald eyes were swollen from a bit too much crying. I began to curse myself for crying myself to sleep, then showered my anger away. My shower felt nice; the lukewarm water brushing against my body soothed me. I got out and put on my normal outfit, and ate a light breakfast consisting of bread and orange juice. I walked out of my door at nine o'clock AM, and made my way to the hospital.
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"Ne, Tsunade-sama, I'm sorry I'm late!" I said, rushing into her office.
I saw her angry look on her face, with a sake cask next to her. I sighed. It was not wise to mess with Tsunade-sama while she was drunk, having a hangover, or simply on her 'time of month'.
"Excuses, excuses. What've you been doing! Crying yourself to sleep, thinking about that traitor?" She hissed.
I felt my eyes watering, and shook them away. I would not show weakness to my sensei. She trained me, helping me become a stronger person, physically and emotionally.
"Eh, Tsunade-sama. I'm sorry."
I bowed, knowing that arguing with my hokage would be instant death.
"Damn! I'm sorry Sakura! I must have had a mood swing! I--didn't say anything hurtful...did I?" She asked, suddenly snapping out of her hissy state and resuming to her kindly state.
"No, Tsunade-sama. However, if you take 'Crying yourself to sleep, thinking about that traitor' to be an insult, Tsunade-sama, then yes...yes you did."
Tsunade-sama just slammed her head on her table, and began to rub her temples.
"I'm so sorry, Sakura! I'm on my time of month, you see! Ehehe...why don't you take a day off as an apology? I'm truly sorry, Sakura, I didn't mean it."
I smiled at her, and bowed. I turned around and left her office. Before I left, I heard her say, "So she still thinks of him, eh?"------
I found myself wandering around the streets of Konoha once more, unable to stop myself from walking. Somehow, I knew where my legs were taking me. I took a deep breath, and sighed. They were taking me to a place of tainted memories, full of bloodshed and lost love. It seemed like a ballad, thinking about what had happened to me. Him leaving me behind...his possible death...it was a ballad. But I can't let myself lose my faith in him. I believed that he would fulfill his promise to me, no matter how long it takes him to do so. I smiled, and sat down on that very same bench, looking at the Konoha gates with eyes full of sorrow. There I began to think of my tainted memories that haunted me...
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I didn't want to think of him, nor all the pain he caused me throughout my years here. Before, I was always a weak kunoichi, and I would always need protection from him. I was always just one of his annoying fangirls, but I was different. I wasn't in his stupid fan club, nor did I steal his belongings and send them on eBay. I was lucky enough to be on Team 7 with him, and I would never ruin anything. As long as he'd improve to his goal, to his ultimate goal in avenging his clan and killing off his brother, then I would be content enough to deal with any pain he had caused me. I was always his annoying teammate that would always confess and be turned down. But there was one thing that annoyed me the most...I would always, always come back to him, no matter how many tears he made me cry, no matter how many nights I cried myself to sleep. I always came back to him, because as long as I'd help his life in any way I could, that was all I needed.
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But he, he was different than many other people. He was cold and filled with ice, his heart made of stone. He was oblivious to his fangirls, but I didn't blame him for that. They were all idiotic bimbos begging for a day to spend with him. But I was different. I wasn't obsessed with him in that way, their way. They were all mesmerized by his stunning looks; his onyx eyes that stared into you, his raven-colored hair shaped like a chicken's butt, his pale skin almost merging with the snow. But I wasn't mesmerized by his looks, I was mesmerized by him. I fell in love with him, and who he was. I helped him and came back to him no matter how many times he pushed me away. I wasn't annoying in their kind of way. I trained harder everytime I heard him describe me as 'weak and annoying'; I helped him train harder when he called himself 'weak'. His ice-cold personality just sucked me in, all at once. My love for him wasn't a childish mirage, it was real. We were like yin and yang, complete opposites that completed each other. But he was oblivious to love. He lived a life without a family - after all, he was an avenger, not a cheesy boyfriend. His cold eyes would always stare me down...but I knew that behind his onyx orbs, he looked into my emerald ones, a stare full of sorrow and apologies. I somehow understood these stares, which was why I'd always come back. I knew that no matter how many times he insulted me and hurt me, he couldn't bring himself to let these words leave his mouth...the three magic words... 'I am sorry'
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Then came Orochimaru, and his curse mark. It made him thirst for power like a dehydrated bird in the middle of a blazing desert. Deep inside, my heart was being torn into an infinite amount of pieces, unable to bring myself to look at him in the same, caring way that I did. But I still looked at him. I still saw that covered alter-ego of himself behind his walls of hate and power. I cried at the thought that he would thirst for so much power that he did, but simply kept coming back to him, hoping that someday, he would accomplish his goal, but not this way. Not leaving behind his 'family' and friends...leaving me behind. I felt selfish, selfish that I could only think of him leaving me. But I don't feel selfish anymore. He didn't have to leave his rival, Naruto, his sensei, Kakashi, his teammate, me...his village, Konoha. It all seemed like a pointless act, to leave everything behind to become evil and betray his village.
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That one fateful night, a night I choose not to remember...but I still remember it clearly like it just happened seconds ago. My legs betrayed me once more, and a feeling of insecurity settled in my mind. I found myself at the gates, staring at his back. I walked up to him, scared about what he was doing with his belongings. I asked him if he was following his curse mark, following his thirst for power to one of the legendary Sannin - Orochimaru. He just nodded, and I found myself dead inside. My heart no longer pumped in my mind, and all I could do was stare at him, tears unconsciously running down my face. He just told me that he was an avenger, but he promised that he would come back. That's all I remember about that night full of sorrow and happiness. How could I feel so happy about him leaving that night? I couldn't bring myself to understand it, but I found myself smiling as I awoke from being knocked out. I was happy that he was on his way to achieving his goal, his dream. But my sorrow overcame my happiness, and I felt myself drowned in loneliness; sad that he left everything he had, behind him.
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For a while after that, I was thrown into a silent depression. Sure, I trained under one of the other legendary Sannin, Tsunade-sama. Sure, I became one of the top medical nin in Konoha. But without him, I was also able to achieve my goal. I became Haruno Sakura, top medical nin in Konoha, apprentice of the Godaime Tsunade, and kunoichi that improved in skills and strength, physically and emotionally. But even though I achieved my goal of becoming stronger, there is no limit to strength. I still train to become stronger, hoping to surpass even Naruto someday. But I'm still in a silent state of depression, my torn heart waiting to be plastered together once more.
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I snapped out of my memory book and brought back to reality as I felt a raindrop roll down my cheek. I looked up at the sky, and whacked myself inside for not noticing the oncoming storm. I smiled, still thinking about those tainted memories that I wish to forget but must remember, and I got up and ran home. I didn't want to catch a cold now, did I? But as I blindly ran, I still thought about those memories...
I somehow understood those stares...which was why I'd always come back to him...no matter how many tears I shed the night before...
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Yay! Another chapter!
