Flightlessness Chapter 8

By Evil Bunny

Disclaimer: Heero and Releena aren't mine, but most of this story is. Huzzah!

Author's notes: in the author bio, as usual.

Leavetaking

            Heero let the door close behind him slowly, resisting the urge to stand before it, blindly staring. He started walking down the same hall he'd just carried her through, feet moving before he'd even decided where he was going. He walked because if he didn't he'd go running back through the door to hold her until the stricken look he'd caught vanished from her face and she promised she'd never leave him again for that place where he'd found her, where he couldn't protect her.

                He'd failed her once already by walking away, when he'd left her alone here, when he'd foolishly thought someone else would look out for her. He'd seen the fear slide back into her eyes before she asked what had happened with the doctors. For a moment he thought she'd bolt, run from him and what he'd let almost happen. And he couldn't have let her run, not here, not when he wasn't sure what would happen if they found her, or how much of her would be left when he caught up.

            This time he'd left her to take care of some business. She was safe in his room, no one would risk his anger by entering without his permission. He'd just have to make sure everyone knew she was under his protection now. That and whoever had sent those doctors after her had some explaining to do.

            The doctors…Heero took the strange emotions he'd felt ever since he'd been unable to pull the trigger all those hours ago and fed them into the cold rage he directed at those in command. He shouldn't have had to find her fleeing. Shouldn't have had to carry her down these same halls, not quite sure if she'd know his name when he put her down. Shouldn't feel so damned responsible.

            He still wasn't sure why this mattered so much. He'd let her out of the garden, why wasn't that enough? He was a soldier, not some sort of bodyguard\babysitter, he should just let it be. She'd have to deal with her demons some time, everyone did. But somehow he couldn't tune her out like the rest, and he wanted to know why.

            He knew also that it didn't matter what decision the upper ranks came to, she would never have to go back to the doctors. Heero allowed himself one cold smile; it wasn't as if anyone could stop him.

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            Heero could hear the discussion coming from the officer's lounge before he even turned the corner to that hall. He paused by the door, listening, he was sure he'd heard Releena's name. Noin was arguing for something, and he wanted to know what before he announced his departure with the girl.

            "We can't keep her here! Doctors have already gotten into a fight over the poor thing, and the moment the press gets near her she's never going to see a day of peace ever again. She can barely deal with being here as it is, she's so fragile right now she'd bruise from a glance and it won't take long for her to shatter completely. She won't be able to cope."

            "We'll deal with it NOin," replied the detached voice of Zechs. "Just not yet. She'll be fine until we can arrange accommodations for her."

            "You can't just send her off with some stranger! She's only just escaped lord know what hell, and putting her back under guard could be disastrous! Why won't you let me take her to safe house six myself? It isn't in use and she'd be safe there."

            "I need you here. You know that." came the unarguable reply. "There are still a million administrative duties to get done and I won't cripple the organization for some wounded bird. If you can find someone to take her, fine, if not she'll just have to cope."

            "I'll take her." Heero's sudden appearance in the doorway startled them both, regardless of the fact he had appeared thus many time before, without warning. His abrupt statement seemed to startle them even more. Zechs' face remained hidden, along with his expression, but Noin stared at him in momentary astonishment. She'd been trying to get him on vacation leave for months, in an attempt to avoid the burnout they could all see coming, but he'd refused to even acknowledge the subject. Yet here he was volunteering for something other than the most dangerous of missions; willingly taking a position that would keep him off active duty.

            The expression on his face added to the mystery. Far from open, his eyes nevertheless held a flicker of life not seen in them before. Noin turned to Zechs as he reshuffled the papers on his desk. If he'd accept Heero's offer, two might be saved instead of just the one.

            "So its true, the girl is with you now." Heero gave no reply to this statement, nor did Zechs appear to expect one. "Very well. I'll issue you the keys and assignment changes shortly. You'll leave at once, before she causes any more problems." The two men exchanged nods, and Heero turned to leave the way he had come. Noin paused him with a hand to before he quite reached the hall.

            "She'll want this." and with that she passed him a dress not unlike the one Releena had worn in the garden, the back cut away. Heero nodded, and with what Noin would almost describe as a look of gratitude if she didn't know better, left quickly.

            Back in the hall, as he let his feet take him back to her, Heero knew that leaving soon was for the best. Just so long as he didn't need to argue with them, while she sat alone. He'd left her alone too much already.

            The dress Noin had handed him felt warm and smooth under his fingers, well-worn and soft from frequent washings. Smart of Noin to have found her something, he hadn't been sure how they were going to work around her wings, but she could wear this easily enough. His mind leapt quickly from the feel of the fabric to the skin it would conceal, almost before he noticed. Skin that smelled slight of honeysuckle and...

            No,  focus on something else. Safehouse six was not what he would have chosen. Isolated, the forest surrounding it allowed for plenty of hiding for attackers. But then, no one really expected that type of attack. No, this wasn't the same type of danger at all, they needed to protect her from their own. But it didn't matter, anyone who tried to get her would find a nasty surprise in him.

            Heero successfully kept his mind on arrangements for transportation and supplies until he walked through the door to his room. The startled gasp abruptly recalled to him her occupancy of the before always empty room, and that perhaps he should have knocked. The square of light the door let into the room fell directly onto her, broken only by his shadow. She sat carefully in the only chair, her feet slightly above the bare floor, her wings carefully arranged about her so that they touched nothing. Only the small puddle of water showed where they'd rested against the floor.

            She'd obviously been staring out the window while waiting for him, and Heero's mind flew immediately to the view, cataloging each item she could possibly have been watching as if jealous of her attention. He'd looked out only once when he'd first arrived and not since, but he could tell here every exit and entrance to the small courtyard and dry fountain she'd seen. But somehow he doubted that's what had captured her attention, and with her there the view suddenly seemed different, more real.

            The light spilling from the light hall reflected off the pale feathers, making her seem just as pale as she had in the moonlight. She must have turned the lights off herself while she waited, surely he wouldn't have left her here in the dark. Perhaps so she could see out into the night. With a flick he turned the overhead back on, and the window view snapped from night to her reflection.

            She stood quickly, half facing him, standing guiltily as if caught doing something forbidden by looking out his window and blinking in the sudden light. Heero caught himself checking for the expression in her eyes, but although startled, the blankness was blessedly gone.

            Her hair still hung in damp strands, but it seemed brushed as best as fingers could.

And she was wearing his clothes; his. Heero's breath caught as a fire of possessiveness swept through him at the sight, and he crumpled the dress, forgotten, in his fist before letting it drop to the ground.  She'd found a pair of drawstring pajama pants he'd never even worn, but even in them she was breathtaking.

            For a top...she still wore only a towel, if wore accurately described the way she simply clutched it before her. The possessiveness was joined by another warmth as the thoughts he had so successfully pushed away came flooding back, and his eyes traced curves he'd been studiously ignoring. Half dressed but fully awake Heero felt more aware of the soft cream of her skin than he had while he'd carried her.

            Following his eyes, Releena gave a second gasp and spun around, a faint pink clear across both her cheeks. Her wings flew about her to resettle like frightened mice in this new direction.

            Heero only heard the beginning of her stammered explanation about a reluctance to cut his shirts to pieces. With her back to him, her hair swung forwards, the harsh indoor lighting revealed in its full glory every scar that molded the base of her wings. They built on each other, running blue and crawling along her shoulder blades before down her spine to disappear in trickles past her waistline. A few even grasped about her ribs, although he couldn't see how far to the front they ran. An obscene embrace, they marked her horrors just as surely as the wings they surrounded.

            Heero moved forwards slowly, staring in this light less forgiving than the moon. Each scar was cut with a surgical precision, the lines straight and even, each planned and calculated and healed only to prepare the way for more. Old and new they formed patterns designed for reasons he didn't even want to begin to understand.

            Far different were his own scars, acquired in battle or training, crescents from slipped knives and flying metal. They too told a story, but one of work, not horror. How could there be so many...

            Heero let his fingers drift just above one of the largest, which ran from almost her collar down to the end of her ribs and from which so many others fanned, not close enough to touch, but enough to make her shiver. He stood so close now, within in the cage of her wings, and each breath he took he watched move the fine hairs on the back of her neck.

            He could see her watching him from the reflection in the window, her eyes wide, but he could see nothing of the rest of the room, only a white curtain. If she turned, he'd become helplessly entangled in the feathers.

            She'd stopped talking, standing still like a startled creature not yet sure of flight. He wanted to count each cut, to know how and where and when. And who had held the knives. He already knew why. Just as he knew that there'd be more scars if he didn't get her away soon.

            Away. Soon. This couldn't be about anything else. As he stepped away again without speaking, whatever had held Releena still left, and she swung her hair back in place, hiding the worst of the damage. Turning slowly, she tried to gather her wings in around her without sweeping the contents of the room with her and for just a moment, he let them brush his face before stepping aside.