CHAPTER 3: UNBROKEN ROAD
For a while now, Lucy had been sitting in front of the dying cookfire, watching in silence as the last pieces of wood turned into coals. Her stomach growled in emptiness, but she just couldn't force herself to eat that stew.
It seemed to be made from stale carrots, potatoes, wild herbs and mushrooms – or at least Lucy hoped those slimy brown things were mushrooms – and the smell was so disgusting she could barely look at it. The mage didn't seem bothered. He had devoured four bowls and was beginning the fifth.
"This is delicious," he mumbled, and tossed the wooden bowl away as he noticed the stew pot was almost empty. He grabbed the hot kettle with bare hands and glanced at her briefly. "Are you sure you're not hungry?"
"Yeah, I'm not hungry," Lucy repeated once again. Crunching her nose, Lucy turned away to avoid vomiting as the mage drank directly from the kettle. "You can have the rest."
Natsu lowered the kettle to his lap. Lucy glimpsed at him, and the orange-brownish stains on his lips and chin made tremors of disgust run through her body. "Thanks," he said, then shoved his head back to the kettle.
Swallowing the bile rising in her throat, she nodded. She wasn't even able to answer. Well, Lucy didn't know how long he had been imprisoned, so she tried to understand that. Perhaps, when one didn't have anything to eat for days, they'd enjoy any spoiled stew they'd just find. Lucy had been lucky enough to never truly know hunger in her life, as her parents' table had always been full.
Shivering, she looked around the mine. The water rippled beneath an uncrossed bridge which led to the other half of the mine. Torchlight gleamed there in silence, making Lucy's mind alert. Could there really have been only two bandits in this mine? Exhaustion made her body as heavy as iron, but restlessness forced her to move.
"I… I'm going to take a look around, see if there's anything else to eat," Lucy said as she stood up. The mage's voice echoed in the kettle as he mumbled an answer, then Lucy left him with the disgusting stew.
Just nearby, two small axes lay on the ground, abandoned and lonely. As a test, she took one of them into her hands. The weight of the weapon surprised her. Rusty drops stained the steel, and Lucy knew it wasn't rust. What kinds of horrible things had this axe done? How many lives had it taken? Holding such a vessel for death felt surreal.
Everything felt surreal.
Her face reflected from the stained steel. She flinched at the sight. Her skin had lost all colour and her hair was messy like a bird's nest. Charcoal and ash painted marks on her cheeks and forehead, covering the bloody scratches. She had never seen herself in a shape like that. Her mother had always made sure that her daughter appeared washed and tidy, dressing her in beautiful dresses and braiding her hair in the mornings.
With the memory of her mother throwing her mind into another turmoil, Lucy looked away to forget her shabby appearance. She could get washed up when they'd reach a town, maybe tomorrow. As she lifted her gaze from the ground, she saw a bridge that led across the water into the darkness. Slowly, she began walking towards it.
When she reached the bridge, she set her foot on the old wood. It seemed strong enough to carry her to the other side, but she hesitated. Was it safe to explore the mine on her own? Was it utterly stupid and risky? Through the clouds in her mind, Lucy's intuition pointed her towards the end of the bridge. She just had to go and check it, not knowing why. She couldn't stay still either.
Quietly, she crossed the bridge as her heart began to race in her chest. Her fingers gripped around the weapon's handle as she proceeded into the tunnel. The chambers there looked like prison cells, one of them significantly larger than the others. Barrels, chests, and weapon stands filled it, so it had to be a storage room. Perhaps there she could find the equipment she needed for this long journey.
Lucy peeked behind the corner, and the air got stuck in her throat as it tightened like a rope, her legs freezing in place.
There was a woman sitting on a chair in front of the storage chamber, holding the hilt of a bloodstained greatsword.
Lucy stepped back and pressed herself against the dusty wall. She held her breath as a curse escaped her lips, a regret of going here alone filling her heart. Just why didn't she stay there with the mage? Lucy squeezed the axe in her hand, and then peeked at the bandit again.
Several scars ran over her face and her dark hair had been shaved from the sides. The tribal patterns painted on her scalp informed of her high rank, but her horned helmet rested on the backrest of the chair. The woman's eyes were closed as she slept. How hadn't she awakened to all the rumbling and fighting from the other chamber? Was she deaf? Though, when Lucy halted to listen, she could only hear the water rippling beneath them. Maybe the thick, earthy walls had blocked out the noise.
"Hey Lucy, where did you go?"
Except for that noise, the mage's voice ringing clear in her ears – and the bandit's, too.
Mumbling a silent curse, Lucy hid behind the wall again. She squeezed herself into the shadows as the bandit awakened.
"Who's there?" the woman wondered, alert and sharp as if she hadn't been sleeping at all. Lucy pressed herself against the stone, raising the axe in front of her face. The bandit's shadow moved on the edges of the tunnel and the greatsword clattered on the rocky floor as she lifted it up.
The bandit circled in front of her and Lucy pinched her eyes closed. Not knowing what to do, Lucy swung the axe forward with all of her strength. A putrid, wet thud sounded in the dusty air. Hot fluid splattered on her face. Her grip loosened around the handle and a body thumped to the ground.
Lucy screamed when she opened her eyes.
"Are you okay, Lucy?" Natsu asked as he arrived. "I heard a scream." He lowered his gaze to the woman lying on the floor with an axe poking out from the middle of her forehead. "… Oh."
Lucy lifted her hands to her face as a crimson pool spread beneath the body. The armoured chest rose no more, and Lucy's legs went limp. She collapsed on her knees, holding back her ragged shrieks. Natsu turned his eyes from the macabre sight to Lucy, and lifted his brows in wonder.
"She's… She's dead," Lucy sobbed through the tears. "Oh gods, I… I killed her. Oh no, no, gods no, I…"
Her stomach cramped and then she vomited on all fours, nothing but bile coming out from her empty stomach. She could never bring herself to kill anyone, never. It had to be a bad dream, there was no way it could be true. Soon she would wake up in the warmth of her own bed, glad it had been just a nightmare, and never wish for an adventure again.
"Hey, it's alright. You'll get used to it, I swear," the mage stated coldly, crouching by the corpse. Natsu took the keys from her belt, walked to the storage chamber's gate and tested them on the lock. Old metal creaked as it opened. "Do you wanna loot this room? Give you something else to think about."
Lucy wiped stomach acid from her face and glared at him. Didn't he truly feel anything when a stranger was killed? The horrendous guilt wrenched her heart apart, so how could he remain so damned cold and calm?
"I... I want to go home," she sobbed. She moved to her knees, peeking at the dead body over her shoulder, and felt like throwing up again. That sight would haunt her forever, she knew.
"A dragon burned your home to the ground," Natsu reminded and disappeared into the chamber. "I wouldn't go home if I were you."
She shook her head. "But I... I k-killed her! I've... I'm a monster..."
"You think killing an outlaw who would have killed you makes you a monster?" he answered with a dry chuckle. "We aren't inside Helgen's walls anymore, girl. Welcome to the wilds."
Lucy went silent and bit her lower lip, still tasting acid on her tongue. She shook her head, looking down in shame. The mage was right. If she hadn't struck that axe to the bandit's forehead, she would have been impaled by the greatsword herself. An instinct had driven her action, and thanks to it, she was still breathing, and the bandit was not.
Kill or be killed, they said.
Her tears ran out soon, but the trembling didn't cease.
After she had collected herself, Lucy asked the mage to burn the bandit's corpse as well. As the evidence of the bloodshed turned into a pile of ashes, Lucy managed to shut it out and keep going on. While the bandit burned, Natsu checked the rest of the mine, and couldn't find any more bandits. He was convinced they'd be safe from now on, but Lucy didn't believe it so easily.
There wasn't a single safe place in her world anymore.
She tried to focus on their upcoming journey to Winterhold, even though it seemed so far away and distant. In order to survive, Lucy needed equipment. The mage had explained what she needed and why, but her ears had filtered most of it away. She just stood in the corner of the storage chamber and blankly stared at the wall. The events of the terrible day were still replaying in her vision, but slowly they started to fade to black.
"I think this leather armour would suit you," Natsu said while going through one of the chests, catching Lucy's attention. "I know you'd like to wear mage's robes, but until you learn how to defend yourself, you should keep some armour on."
The mage tossed a set of hard-boiled leather to Lucy, and she picked them up hesitantly. Despite being ugly, old and worn, it would serve her better than a ripped dress. "Try it on," the mage insisted.
Lucy frowned, clutching her fingers into the leather. "I'd... I'd like some privacy when I change, please."
Natsu gazed at her in confusion and then continued digging the bandit's stuff like he hadn't even heard. Lucy sighed and turned around. He hadn't understood what she meant. She didn't want to change clothes around a man she'd just met, but she had no other choices – she didn't want to go out there alone either.
"No peeking, then," she sighed quietly and slipped out from her dress. She loosened the strings on the leather armour and began to dress into it, wondering which part went where. She hadn't known armours were so complicated. The lack of proper lighting didn't make it any easier.
"Look, an orcish dagger!" Natsu exclaimed, joy in his voice for the first time today. He turned and showed the blade to her, fully oblivious to her half-naked state. "Sharp as fuck, barely used –"
Lucy shrieked and covered herself with her arms. "I said no peeking!" she cried out, her cheeks flaring up bright red.
"Don't worry, this chest is the only one I'm interested in. There's even some gold –"
"Look away, idiot!"
"Okay, okay, calm down," he assured and looked away. "But that armour is the wrong side out, by the way."
Painfully aware of her burning red cheeks, Lucy turned the leather around and suddenly it got much easier to dress into. Natsu tossed her a pair of bracers and hide shoes as well. When she was ready, she looked like a bandit herself. Mother would have scolded her if she saw her now.
The leather didn't restrain her movements, but it felt stiff and hard like it hadn't been worn in years. Stretching a bit, she tested her new trajectories and walked to the bookshelf. Lucy had always loved reading, so maybe a good story would offer her some distraction. The outlaws weren't friends of literature, but there were some dusty maps and journals. She took the first book into her hands and frowned. "The Lusty Argonian Maid? Gods," she cringed and put the book back. That she didn't want to read tonight.
Natsu closed the chest, having found everything he looked for. He had hauled a dagger, a new pair of boots and a small coin purse. Then he opened one of the barrels and a sweet scent of fresh apples puffed into the air. Despite being hungry, Lucy didn't even notice. A peculiar book on the shelf had caught her attention.
"There are some apples for you, if you'd like," the mage announced and picked up one.
Ignoring him, Lucy trailed her fingers on the book's purple cover. A strange letter had been carved into the leather, and the book seemed to radiate some mysterious energy. It had to be a spell tome. Lucy had never held one in her hands. The mage peeked over her shoulder to see what she had found.
"Is this a real spellbook?" Lucy asked in astonishment, and Natsu nodded. Like a ray of light, the spellbook brought her a spark of joy she thought she'd lost forever. "Which school of magic does this belong to?"
Only magic could save her now.
"That's a conjuration book, I know that from the Daedric letter on the front. Let me see it," Natsu answered. Lucy gave the book to him, and he browsed a few pages. "Oh, looks like it's about conjuring familiars. You know what they are?"
Lucy's eyes brightened. "Ghostly companions of the wizards. Wolves, owls, cats…" she said with a faint smile. "That book teaches how to summon them, right?"
Natsu nodded, but then gave her a quizzical stare. "Indeed it does. Have you… have you ever used any magic?"
His question put a sudden cold feeling into her chest. Somehow ashamed, she shook her head softly. The mage's sigh smothered her hope.
"Well, Lucy, the thing is," he started awkwardly. "Those wishing to enter the College must show some degree of skill with magic. If you have never cast a single spell, I'm afraid you won't be allowed to join. I'm sorry."
Lucy glanced at the book, tracing her thumbs over the Daedric letter. Those weren't the words she had wanted to hear, but she had expected them. However, she couldn't let go of her dreams so easily.
"If I could learn this spell, would I be allowed in?" she asked, her voice meek.
Natsu shrugged. "Maybe."
Lucy remained silent while she gathered courage for a question. "Could you... Could you teach me?" she asked shyly. The mage looked at her like he hadn't heard properly, but then he lifted his shoulders.
"I'm not good at teaching," he answered, scratching the back of his head. "But I can try."
She nodded. Magic was surely hard to learn, but she knew she could if she'd just train hard enough. She'd pour all of her grief and shock into learning magic, and she wouldn't run out of fuel anytime soon.
"How long does it take to travel to Winterhold?" she asked then, and went to pick a leather knapsack from the corner. She put the spellbook into it, and only then she noticed the apple in the mage's hand. The apple was warm when she took it. He had been holding it for a while.
"I don't know. A few weeks or more by feet."
Lucy blinked, narrowing her eyes as she gathered more apples from the barrel. "By feet? We found some gold. We could hire a carriage from Riverwood, and travel to –"
"We won't," Natsu said, suddenly becoming restless. "I… I get sick in a cart. Very sick. I can't stand it. So we'll walk."
Lucy stared at him, her brow rising. "But they took you to Helgen in a cart and you were just fine."
"Yeah, I vomited blood just before reaching the city gates," he replied. His face became pale, and he quickly switched their subject of speech. "And speaking of going to Winterhold, I'd prefer the mountain route because there aren't any guards, but with you, it might be safer to travel Whiterun's road instead, through the Valtheim Towers and there to Windhelm."
"Safer by how?" she wondered.
"Are you up to a horde of frost trolls and ice wraiths yet?" Natsu asked, and Lucy got quiet. "Yeah, I think so, too. Riverwood doesn't have soldiers, so we'll pass through there tomorrow morning, avoid Whiterun and soon we'll be in the Old Holds, far from the Empire's reach."
Lucy tried to imagine the route, visioning the map of Skyrim in her head, but she couldn't keep it together. Though she had heard the names of the places before, she couldn't recall where exactly they were. She trusted the mage could navigate them to their destination, no matter how long it would take, or how dangerous it would be. However, one thing didn't add up.
"But why would've you gone through the Rift?" Lucy asked, suddenly remembering what Natsu had told her earlier. "Don't you have bounty there, for burning Shor's Stone?"
Natsu shrugged, and a strange grin appeared on his face. "The Imperials arrested me, not hold guards. As long as we don't go to that village, we should be fine. I bet they still remember me."
Lucy chuckled dryly. It would surely be the case, for the mage's features were rather unique. Especially his hair. One wouldn't so easily forget a man with pink hair.
Speaking of his hair, something behind his head caught Lucy's attention. There was a hunting bow hanging on the wall with a quiver full of arrows. She admired its curved shape, feeling a resonance of some with her and the bow. Like it was asking for her to take it with her, to accompany their journey to her new life.
"Damn, I think my head is gonna fall off my shoulders on its own if I don't get some sleep," Natsu said abruptly, and Lucy's gaze shot from the bow to him. "I'm gonna go finish that stew and lay down. Okay?"
She nodded. The mage stuffed his things into a leather bag and headed back to the first chamber. Lucy kept eyeing the bow, imagining how it would feel in her hands, what it would feel like to draw an arrow and release it, and watch from the shadows as it hit the target's heart.
She answered the bow's call and grabbed it from the rack. It felt unquestionably better than an axe.
Against her expectations, she had fallen asleep with ease.
Perhaps it had been the campfire Natsu had rekindled for the night or just the mage's presence, but the moment Lucy settled into a bandit's former bedroll, she was out of it. Her dreams circled around the dragon and her burning home, but instead of fleeing, she picked up a bow and fought against the black, mighty beast.
In her dream, she refused to watch her life being burned to cinders. She stood her ground as the dragon landed in front of her, earth quaking beneath her feet. Lucy drew the bow and released it, and right before the arrow hit the dragon's eye, someone dragged her out of the dream by fiercely shaking her from the shoulders.
"Riverwood is crowded with Imperial soldiers!"
Lucy's eyes snapped open as the mage tore her out of the bedroll's warmth. Already accelerated by her dream, her heart raced rapidly in her chest as she saw the panic spreading in Natsu's eyes.
"What… what's happening?" Lucy stuttered.
The mage pulled her up, picked up their bags and headed to the bridge. He glanced over his shoulder while Lucy stood next to the extinguished fire, frozen and frightened. Not knowing what to do, she at least lifted the hunting bow from the ground and curled her fingers tightly around its body.
"Come on, follow me," he beckoned with haste. "It's not safe here. We have to go, now!"
As Lucy's legs refused to move, the mage ran back to her and grabbed her wrist. He tugged her arm, and she almost tackled her feet. Lucy forced herself to run as the mage hurried across the bridge, his grasp strong around her wrist – even though her body felt numb, she didn't want to be dragged across the mine's floor. If she did, the bow would surely break.
"While you were still sleeping, I sneaked out and checked how's the situation in Riverwood. From the woods I could see that the place's crowded by soldiers from Whiterun, and everything that passes through the village is tightly controlled. There's no way we'll pass through unnoticed," Natsu explained as they ran through the mine, reaching the tunnel's back end.
The light of the morning sun flooded in from the opening, and her eyes hurt from the brightness as they stepped into the forest.
"W-where will we go now?" Lucy asked, gazing around. They had arrived a bit further from the main entrance, and she could see to Riverwood from there. Natsu had been right. Lucy had never seen so many soldiers and guards in that peaceful village.
Natsu pulled her arm, leading her in the opposite direction. "We'll go through Helgen's ruins and to the mountain route. I know you're not ready for such a dangerous trip, but I'll try to keep you safe."
The uncertainty in his voice scared her.
Hiding behind the bushes and trees, they sneaked beside the crag, trying not to step on any branches on the ground. When they reached the mine's main entrance, Natsu let go of Lucy's hand, allowing her to walk on her own from there. She was scared, yes, but her legs carried now.
There was no danger for her in Riverwood, the soldiers weren't her enemies, but she was still cautious. The mage was her chance to get to the College of Winterhold – if he'd get arrested, her dream would wither at the same.
She'd go through any detour as long as she'd make it to the College.
They made it through the forest and arrived at the road. Riverwood was far out of sight, and no soldiers patrolled the road from here. Lucy took support from her knees, inhaling fresh air into her lungs in an attempt to calm down. To her, it seemed they'd make it safely from there, but the mage didn't look so relaxed yet. He glanced around nervously as if he sensed something in the woods.
Lucy raised her head and wiped the morning dew from her face. Her gaze followed the road to the uphills where Helgen's ruins lied, black smoke still rising from within the once-unbreakable walls.
Then a pained howl echoed in the air, a quick warning before a pack of wolves emerged from the forest.
Gasping, Lucy grabbed her bow and picked an arrow from the quiver she had secured on her belt. With absolutely no idea how to use the weapon, her hands began to tremble as she tried to place the arrow on the string. The wolves were a distance away but would reach them in seconds if they'd notice them. They whimpered as if they were afraid, frightened by something even more terrifying.
"Wait," Natsu told, holding her still. "Someone's there."
Lucy bit into her tongue. Someone? Who in the world could put fear into wild beasts if not another beast?
Then a woman in plate steel armour jumped from the forest, putting a wolf on her sword as she landed on the road. Blood sprung from the poor animal as it died. The woman pulled her weapon from the flesh, swinging it at the remaining wolves, striking them to death with no mercy. Her bright red hair glowed in the sun, the same shade as the blood on her blade.
Lucy glanced at the mage beside her, his grip on her bicep tightening.
"Kynareth save me," he whispered, petrified by the sight. "That's Erza fucking Scarlet."
