The Hitchhiking Ghosts sat in the cargo hold of an airplane. "Talk about low class," grumbled Gus.
"I can't wait to get to China!" cried Ezra in excitement. "I brought my big book of stereotype jokes!"
"You'd better not say anything," warned Phineas. "That's what got us kicked out of Paris. I'm amazed we're still at Tokyo."
"Fine, fine. I won't make any witty jokes or anything. I personally think we should put the mansion in Adventureland continuing with the tradition of putting the mansion in a different area in every park!"
"Adventureland?" said Gus.
Ezra happily waved his arms around. "Yeah, you could ride a boat through and there would be tikis and a treehouse section..."
"That just sounds like a mixture of all the other Adventureland sections," Phineas pointed out.
"Well, everything would be dead."
"How about Tomorrowland?" suggested Gus.
"YES!" cheered Ezra. "Ghosts of the future! That's what we need!"
A flight attendant walked in. "We've reached Hong Kong."
"Great!" smiled Phineas. "When do we land?"
The attendant opened the cargo door. "Oh, you don't land..."
The ghosts found themselves thrown off the plane and landed with a splash in a pond. "So this is Hong Kong," said Ezra.
Phineas climbed out. "Sure is wet. Let's just find our way to the Happiness Hotel."
A woman walked by. "The Happiness Hotel? It's that way...and good luck."
"What did that mean?" wondered Gus.
"She must be being polite," said Ezra. "Either that or the hotel is actually a collapsing pile of crap and sawdust."
A little later, they were standing in front of the hotel. It was indeed a collapsing pile of crap and sawdust.
Phineas sighed. "If this is the Happiness Hotel, I'd hate to see the sad one."
"ZING!" cried Ezra.
They walked inside to find a little bird sleeping on a desk. He had a head that looked like an orange.
"Hey," smiled Phineas, "aren't you the Orange Bird who advertized juice in Florida?"
"Yep," replied the bird, "until Disney just stopped using me. There's a lot of others like me here. So what can I do for you?"
"Well, we're checking in."
"More people?" groaned the Orange bird. "Hey guys...somebody's checking in!"
"SOMEBODY'S CHECKING IN?" cried a huge crowd of characters. Music started up. That's right, it's a showstopper!
(To the tune of "Happiness Hotel")
Orange Bird: Well, we've got cutesy guys like Skippy who you'll really want to hug
Got guys like the Gummi Bears when their channel pulled the plug
So when your cast off by the others and you're flying through the skies
You end up here with all us obscure guys
"What happened to this place?" asked Gus.
"All of us were sent here," explained the Orange Bird. "We keep sending Mickey letters and E-mails asking to come home, but he never answers!"
"Hey," Phineas whispered to his friends, "didn't Mickey say that everyone LIKED it here?"
"Something weird's going on," agreed Ezra.
Creeper: The critics didn't like my movie, they thought it was too adult
Basil: At least I'm lucky that my film has an enormous cult
Professor Owl: Thankfully when they're forgotten, a character never dies
All: He ends up here with all us obscure guys
"Awesome!" grinned Ezra. "It's Professor Owl! Can you sing the Sing-a-Long song theme for us?"
"Since then I've become a heavy drinker."
"Oh...okay." The ghosts backed away.
All: Welcome home (welcome home)
Welcome home (welcome home)
We sit and watch dumb reruns of "Full House" and "Family Ties"
Toaster: Even us rusty machines here haven't died or gone deceased
Radio: We're hanging 'round with Disney though we're Hyperion released
Kirby: We just sit and wonder if the remake rumors are all lies
Brave Little Toaster Cast: Yeah, we came here with all the obscure guys
Gus looked around. "This is getting really creepy..."
"Hey, we like creepy!" reminded Ezra. "Right?"
Phineas gulped. "Yeah, but...they're looking at us like rabid wolves."
"What's wrong with rabid wolves?" called Li'l Bad Wolf.
Sam: Oh, there are bugs
(Ollie: There are bugs)
Sam: And there are lice
(Ollie: There are lice)
Icabod Crane: Sure, we have our little problems, like being upstaged by mice
Ezra: You got every character here
Gus: Some we haven't seen in years
Orange Bird: Ending up in this dump is what every Disney thing fears
Alley Cats: Though you've got your own attraction and some decent merchandise
All: You'll fit right in with all us obscure guys
Hitchhiking Ghosts: We'll fit right in
All: With all us obscure guys!
"You're all a bunch of freaks," grumbled an Air Conditioner in the corner.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Hitchhiking Ghosts were shown to their new room by Lampy and Radio. It was small dark and empty.
"Well, here's where you'll be staying!" announced Lampy.
Radio hopped up onto a little table. "And us too. We'll be here as your only appliances."
"That's nice, but we'll be fine," Ezra said politely.
"Be a pal!" urged Radio. "I've got Radio Disney!"
"Doesn't that only play pop songs and rarely anything that's actually Disney?" Phineas pointed out.
"Shut up."
"Let them stay," insisted Gus. "If I get bored, I can just smash them."
"Exactly!" agreed Lampy. "If he gets bored, he can...uh-oh."
Phineas yawned. "Let's just go to sleep. We'll check out the Magic Kingdom tomorrow."
They got into the fold-out bed, which folded back into the wall. "Can you turn yourself out, Lampy?" called Ezra.
"No problem. See? Total convenience!"
