CHAPTER 21: CLAIRVOYANCE 2/2
A persistent smile stuck on Lucy's lips as she carried the books to her quarters. Natsu found it funny and a bit strange at the same time how anyone could get so happy about reading. To him, it had always felt like a punishment of sort.
Because the alchemist's quarters were colder than the other rooms, Natsu went to put on his cloak as they arrived at the Hall of Attainment, and advised Lucy to do the same. He wasn't sure if she heard. She just nodded and kept humming some faint melody, searching for the key to her room from her pockets while Natsu left upstairs.
After dressing up, Natsu waited in the hallway with Happy while Lucy organised the books in her room. The door was left open, but he didn't feel like interfering with her systemized ritual of placing the tomes on the shelf. She had most likely done that a lot on her job, but Natsu still didn't see any point in categorizing them by name, genre, author and even a goddamn colour. She had just a dozen books and it took her long enough for Natsu to open a bottle of spiced mead.
"I bet she's reading them all now", Natsu said to the cat by his side, taking a sip of the drink. It tasted of cinnamon and clove. "There's no other way it's taking her so long."
Lucy was quick to answer. "I heard that!" she cried out, and Natsu heard a book closing. "I… I was having a snack. I was so excited I forgot to eat lunch, but I'm coming in a moment! Just a tiny little moment!"
Soon she returned to the hall dressed in a black, warm cloak, with an apothecary's satchel hanging on her waist. Natsu chuckled when he saw an apple in her hand – she had totally been reading. Lucy gestured at Natsu to sign she was ready now, and so he left his half-finished mead bottle on the railing and followed her to the door.
"I really hope we won't blow up the lab this time", Lucy said, suddenly breaking the silence as they crossed the courtyard. Natsu glanced at her and smiled when Happy swept her legs with his tail. The cat seemed to like her.
"The one at the shack was in a dire need of some maintenance. The labs shouldn't explode like that", Natsu said. "But it was fun though."
By the rule, the alchemy lab and the enchanting table were free of use as long as no accident happened, but such rules were easily and often bent. Accidents were bound to happen on the College grounds. That's why they were located in the Hall of Countenance, so experienced wizards would stop a catastrophe before it would spread, preferably prevent it from occurring in the first place.
"I brought some ingredients I collected, and some I found in Igneel's room. Mirajane let me keep some of them", she told and took a bite from the apple, chewing it before continuing. "Would healing potions be useful? Or those which help to restore magicka?"
"Depends on what you've got."
Lucy opened the door of the tower, pushing it far back that Natsu could step in after her before it closed. The atmosphere in the Hall of Countenance was so different from the Hall of Attainment. Strict and serious – as if their every movement was monitored by the eyes of the scholars and masters. Perhaps Natsu just imagined it.
"Mountain flowers, dragon's tongues, lavender…" Lucy listed as she went through her satchel. "Some spider eggs, creep cluster, wheat and white mushrooms."
Natsu chuckled. "Sounds like a poison recipe."
They headed upstairs, through the silent halls. Natsu hadn't been there often, and almost felt like an intruder. If his alchemy skills were rusty, his enchanting was even worse. Igneel had always done it for them if they ever needed potions or something enchanted, so maybe it was about time to learn it himself.
When Natsu walked past his brother's locked room, a strange cold grasp caught his throat. It was one of the reasons why he didn't like to visit this tower too often. Happy sprung to the door and ran straight through it, disappearing into the realm no one else had entered in six years.
It had been so long since Natsu had last seen his brother. Would he still look the same if he'd one day return? Would he still wear the same black robes? Would he still have the same, stupid haircut? A lone strand of his dark hair stood atop of his head like an antenna, denying all the laws of nature.
Natsu chuckled at the thought. He had been so young when Zeref left, and even when his face had begun to shroud in mist, the detail of his hair stayed clear in Natsu's memory.
"Your brother lived there?" Lucy asked, noticing where the blue cat had gone. Natsu replied with a nod, and she fell silent for a moment, stopping in front of the door. "Have you ever thought about breaking in? I'm sure the lock can be picked. Every lock in the world can."
Natsu shrugged, a chill filling his heart. "I don't want to."
Natsu had heard from the other members of the College that his brother had shared his quarters with Mavis, a Breton sorceress. They had been inseparable since their very first meeting, often called 'lovebirds' among the other students.
His parents had been rather strict, not allowing their sons to assess any courtship until they'd be of age. Zeref clearly hadn't given any shit about that, leaving his parents in a perfect unawareness of their son's premarital acts. When parents denied something, the children did it anyway, just behind their backs. And a College so far from home was the perfect place for it. The first time Zeref mentioned Mavis in the letters he sent home was only when they got engaged.
A short smile appeared on Natsu's face as he remembered the day that letter arrived. Mother had told his brother was about to get married, and he had just said 'yuck' and continued whatever he'd been doing. He had been eleven or twelve. Such a concept as marriage didn't make any sense to him back then, and it still really didn't. Like getting an arrow in the knee, it was a life sentence Natsu didn't ever want to serve.
However, Mother had been so excited about it. Her eccentric son had finally found a woman, and the whole family could be reunited at their wedding after so many years of being apart. Mother had got very ahead of herself, even started knitting tiny baby socks for her future grandchildren. She had been terrible at it, but Natsu had never seen her so happy.
The wedding was supposed to be held around the next harvest at the Temple of Mara in Riften. The only thing Natsu had been excited about was the journey. He'd never been so far from home, and he wanted to see the Thieves Guild which resided in the town – even when Father said they weren't real.
But then, when the summer had just begun, another letter arrived. There would be no wedding. Mavis had died.
A dwemer ruin had claimed her life – Zeref never specified how exactly she died, but Natsu had a feeling it was dwarven centurion which killed her. Natsu had seen one of those once, and Igneel had told him to run. It had been an enormous mechanic guardian, very strong, and very deadly. Even Zeref couldn't defend her against that. A machine had a machine's will, and no magic could ever bend it.
That letter was the last thing they heard about Zeref. When Natsu came to the College after him, his colleagues said that he returned without Mavis, mumbled about what happened, and then secluded into his quarters. The next day he locked the door forever and he left without saying goodbyes.
And never came back.
"He could've left behind some clues about where he went, or –"
"It was his place", Natsu interrupted, his tone calm but firm. "If he would've wanted someone to enter, he would've left the door open."
Now, Natsu found it strange how passionately he had wanted to find out what happened to Zeref – he had thought it to be something epic, larger than life itself, when in reality it had been painfully simple. There had been nothing to find out. All the facts had been laid up in front of his eyes, but he had been too young to see, too naïve to understand.
Even until the last few years, Natsu had kept his ears and eyes open for clues about his brother's whereabouts. While travelling around the country with Igneel, he had always looked for signs and asked innkeepers if they'd seen a young, eccentric, raven-haired man around. Some rumours they had, but not a single one of them had led anywhere. And eventually, his spark for finding Zeref had faded, and he gave up on his search.
Perhaps Zeref didn't even want to be found.
Happy came back with a melancholic meow. As Lucy stared at the door in silence, Natsu caught the cat into his arms and continued, "And knowing my brother, he has arranged a trap for the poor soul who dares to break into his study. A portal to Oblivion as a doormat or an angry atronach ready to rip you apart."
Lucy raised her brow, slowly nodding. She had finished eating her apple now. "Okay… So, it's better not to try."
Natsu could understand her curiosity. Zeref's disappearance was a tragic mystery, and Lucy seemed to love mysteries. For his first years in the College, Natsu had been tempted to break into Zeref's room many times, but over time he realized he shouldn't do it. There was a possibility that the things he'd find there would only add to his pain.
The best and the only way to deal with the circumstances was to ignore them as completely as he could. He had other things to do than worry about his long-lost brother. Out of sight, out of mind. That mindset had taken him so far.
"Anyway, let's go brew a potion or two", Natsu said, pointing at the door to their left. "Then I can show you how the enchanting table works. I can't promise I can do anything with it, though…"
Natsu opened the door to the alchemist's quarters, letting her enter before him. Awestruck, Lucy froze in the doorway, eyes sparkling at the sight which Natsu had grown used to long ago. The room was cosy, chilly and small – shelves and barrels lined the walls, and last rays of sun bled through the dusty window, glimmering on the bottles of the lab.
Lucy entered, her steps careful as if she feared she'd break something along the way.
"What's this?" Lucy asked, pointing at a bowl that was filled with black dust. Natsu smiled faintly at her enthusiasm. It was something he missed having. She was just like him when he had joined, when every small detail had blown his mind. What had once been the most magical essence in the world was now just the dirt of a storm atronach.
"Void salt", he answered as he walked to the lab. He picked up a clean bottle from a basket underneath the table. "Don't ask me how it's used."
Lucy chuckled dryly. "There was an alchemist in Helgen whose daughter was of the same age as me. We weren't really friends though, which is a pity. I could've learned a lot from her."
Natsu glanced at her, not really comprehending what she meant. The sparkles in her eyes dimmed out as a wistful expression took over her face. Lucy pulled dried lavender and blue mountain flowers from her satchel, avoiding his gaze.
"How was that?" Natsu asked. "I thought you could be friends with anyone."
Lucy went silent abruptly.
"Well, she… We had some drama. Bound to happen in a small town", Lucy answered then and wiped an escaped wisp of hair behind her ear. "She was… jealous, I think. I was friends with a boy she liked, and she didn't like me because of it. Nothing more serious than that."
Pinching his brows, Natsu watched as she placed the flowers in a mortal and picked up a pestle. Crushing and mixing the ingredients was the simplest part, and she needed no help with it. He listened to the soft tapping while trying to make sense of what she said.
"Strange", he thought aloud and rubbed his forehead. "Why would anyone care about who you're friends with?"
Lucy smiled shortly. "A girl's life is sometimes very complicated."
"Clearly."
Natsu felt like Lucy left something unsaid, but didn't mind finding out what. She spoke little about the life she had before, but it seemed like something… normal? At least in the way Natsu defined normal. No wonder why she'd been bored to death in Helgen when who was friends with who was the most complicated thing in life.
And when she did speak about her life, it was almost impossible to believe that she was the Dragonborn. The soul of an immortal dragon residing inside a normal, small-town girl, who had a while ago lived in perfect ignorance about who she truly was. The contrast in her life was so vast, almost like the difference between black and white.
And maybe that was why she appeared to be so fine with it. The change had been so sudden and radical that perhaps she was able to detach from her former life, and focus on all the new happening now. Perhaps she thought she was just dreaming. Could that be her secret of coping so well, and being able to smile?
But how long would it last?
After Lucy had crushed the plants, she placed them in a flask. She lit a fire in the small burner, added water to the mixture and waited until it started to boil. It seemed that whatever she did, she did it with great excellence and expertise, making Natsu question why he was there in the first place. She could manage on her own just as good.
"We can skip the enchanting for now", Lucy said after a silence. "I really like this, brewing potions. It's mesmerizing to watch the liquid drip into a bottle, and this smell is just so wonderful. If I didn't want to be a mage, then I would be an alchemist for sure."
Natsu chortled. "Giant's toes and imp stool will surely change your mind."
Lucy scrunched her nose and leaned to the table. While she waited for the bottle to fill, Natsu studied the ingredients on the shelves. Most of them he couldn't even name. He recognized the purple deathbell flower, for it had grown in the area of his home. Zeref had ingested those during his alchemy research, resulting in a sickness that almost cost his life.
Suddenly, Happy brushed his head against Natsu's legs and meowed loudly. He trotted to the slightly open door with his tail swinging, as if beckoning the mage to follow. Natsu knew where he wanted to go.
"Happy probably wants to go to the roof with me", Natsu told to Lucy. He crouched and rubbed the cat's neck, making him purr again. "You're fine here if I go?"
Lucy nodded before she turned back to the lab. "Of course."
"I'll be up there if you need anything", he said and followed the cat into the hallway. "Just don't add too many snowberries in it." He heard her launch a faded retort as he raced after Happy, who lead him up the stairs of the tower.
The roof of the College was the area that connected the tops of the two towers and the walls surrounding the courtyard. One could use the roof to pass from one tower to another, except for the Hall of Elements. Its top was only accessible for the Arch-Mage.
Natsu pushed open the heavy stone door which led to the roof. Cold air rushed against his body as he stepped into the darkness outside, seeing a blue glowing spot running towards the balcony opening to the south.
As always, the roof was eerily silent. Even the crows were sleeping now. It was a place Natsu often came to cool his head. Natsu followed the cat into the stone canopy, stopping beside a magical brazier. As Happy seated next to him, Natsu wondered if Zeref had come here too for the same purpose, thus causing his cat to continue the habit.
Natsu gazed at the distant silhouettes of mountains drawing against the blackest sky, clear of clouds and lit with thousands of stars. The shrine of Azura, a colossal statue of the Daedric prince of dust and dawn stood on the horizon. Even it looked so small from here.
The town of Winterhold could usually be fully seen from the roof of the College, but now only the lone torches lightened the few buildings. The bridge leading to the College was lit by the magical braziers, and vacant of any travellers.
"You're still waiting for him?" Natsu asked from the cat, who meowed as an answer. "Like if you'd stay here long enough, every night, he'd eventually appear on that bridge?"
What Natsu adored about animals was their loyalty. They didn't give up hope. They believed in their humans until their last breath, and waited for them just as long. Happy never left the College's ground. Natsu didn't know if he was magically bound to stay, or if he didn't want to miss Zeref's hypothetical return.
That hopeless loyalty was something humans could never have.
"You know he'll never come back."
The words escaped his lips with such strength and confidence like he had always known them true, but never dared to say it out loud. He had known it since the day he heard Zeref had left the College, but never really understood it. If he'd ever see his brother again, it wouldn't be here, and only now he knew why.
It was almost ironic how understanding could only be granted for those who shared the same fate.
For many times today, Natsu had thought Igneel was just sleeping in his room. Or maybe he was brewing potions, or hanging out in the Hall of the Elements… but then Natsu remembered that he wasn't. Not there, not anyplace else. Zeref must've felt the same when he returned without Mavis. Like he'd searched for her in places she had been, but would never be again.
He knew it all now. He knew how the walls became cold and hollow, and the silence which once had been the most comfortable thing in the world became deafening, deadly, like the first ice on a lake which would break from only one word.
Zeref left because he couldn't stand it.
And if not for Lucy, Natsu wouldn't stand it either.
Natsu gazed into the distance again. Zeref, unlike Igneel, was still somewhere out there, anywhere in the world, on the opposite end of the void. At this point, did Natsu even want to reunite with him, when he'd been gone for so many years? Would he even look up from the table if his brother would suddenly appear?
Though the family was bound by blood, it only meant so much when time gnawed away the connection. There wasn't a bond so strong in the world that survived time's tooth without an effort to maintain it, or if there was, Natsu was yet to know it.
The absence of Zeref's presence was the voice that spoke in his turn. He had let their brotherhood burn, and Natsu wouldn't be the one to shift the ashes.
He was suddenly snapped out of his thoughts as a door opened behind him. Natsu turned his head, seeing Lucy enter the roof from the Hall of Attainment. She waved her hand and smiled. How much time had passed? Natsu wasn't sure, but his cheeks stung from the cold.
"How'd the brewing go?" Natsu asked as she reached him. Happy hurried to greet her by pushing his head against her stockings, then jumped back on the balcony's fence.
Lucy leaned to the stone railing, lifting her gaze on the sky. "I got three potions done but have no idea what they do."
Natsu smiled shortly. The gloom began to dissolve in his mind at her presence, making him wonder how could she be so… happy? Perhaps it was the wrong word, but she appeared to careless, content, nothing like one was supposed to be when they'd lost everything.
Could it simply be her dream of becoming a mage that kept her sane through all that? Or did she believe there was a purpose for all of her suffering, and that everything would be alright one day? Like a spell of Clairvoyance. A clear goal on the mind, a bigger picture on the horizon, and the view would be easy on the eyes again.
For a second Natsu wondered if he could somehow achieve the same mindset.
The void Igneel left behind felt too vast, too painful to be filled by any dream, but maybe it wasn't the aim after all. A twisted solace was that even the most grotesque wounds closed in time. Just like his connection with his brother, maybe this pain would eventually fade.
All he would need to do was to stop touching the wound and let it heal in peace, and focus on something else completely.
"I got one thing for you", Lucy said, a faint smile forming on her lips. She pulled something from the pocket of her cloak. "This. Igneel's notebook. It was left in the nightstand."
Hesitating a moment, Natsu received the book as Lucy almost forced it into his hands. He traced his shivering fingers over its cover before opening it. His heart skipped a beat as he recognized the familiar handwriting. The dates on the upper corner of the pages were from three years ago.
"I'm… losing my m-mind with this… goddamn half-elf", Natsu read aloud, his speech stuttering and pauses long. The brazier's light was way too dim for reading. "Today he s-set my robes on fire – on purpose – and laughed while my ass-hair burned. I… think I'll teach this d-damned brat a… lesson."
Lucy giggled into the sleeve of her robes. "Well, did he?"
Natsu read a bit more in silence before answering. "It was an accident, but Igneel never believed me", he said and flashed a quick smile. "And if I remember right, he put powdered Falmer ear into my mead as revenge. It was supposed to give me the worst stomachache, but for some reason it did nothing, except for tasting like shit."
"It has been said that a good friend helps you up when you fall", Lucy started, "but a best friend will laugh in your face and trip you again."
"That's pretty much how it was", Natsu said and turned the pages, the smile on his face deepening. "Hey, the instructions for casting our tent! I didn't even know he wrote them up." He raised his eyes from the notebook to Lucy. "Thanks. Really."
Natsu placed the book on his chest, pressing it tightly so the wind wouldn't catch it. He would give it a read later in a better light.
"That just means I can take more books with me if we don't have to carry a tent", Lucy said, shyly looking down. "And what I said earlier, about wanting to stay here… Well, you're right. We shouldn't delay. All the new spells I got will keep me busy on the road just as good."
Though Natsu had expected her to say that, he still raised his brow. "So, we're leaving tomorrow?"
"Yeah." She took a breath and brushed Happy's fur as the cat trotted in front of her. "It will be quite an adventure for sure."
As silence fell between them, Natsu lifted his gaze to the sky. Then, unexpectantly, aurora appeared against the night – bright, colourful waves of magic. They enlightened the world, painting the grey stones of the College's roof in shades of green and azure.
Igneel had once explained what caused them, but Natsu didn't remember. Aurora was said to be a burst of magical energy emanating from Aetherius, radiating down onto Nirn. They were beautiful to look at while they lasted. Like a breath of a goddess dancing across the stars.
"Wow", Lucy sighed, her gaze locked on the colours on the sky. "I've seen some of them in Helgen, but never so bright. But… What's there?"
Something moved at the faraway mountains, a black figure flying alongside the green lights. Natsu recognized the shape, and he knew Lucy did too.
"A dragon", she whispered.
When listening close enough, Natsu could hear its roars, like thunder raging across the distance. The dragon was far away now, but it could cross the space between them in minutes if it wanted to. It seemed peaceful before it disappeared behind the mountains again, still leaving him holding his breath.
Could it have been the large, black dragon that had attacked Helgen and raised another dragon from the grave? Or was there more of them now? Lucy was the only one who could stop them, but they had barely survived just one dragon. Would the few dragons breed and overtake the entire country now, as the prophecies said? Would the world come to an end, despite all their efforts?
Natsu turned to Lucy again. She stared into the horizon with the lights of aurora twirling on her face. The sighting of another dragon plunged her deep into her thoughts, and what was going on in her mind, Natsu had absolutely no idea of. But she didn't look scared. No, far from it.
Then it suddenly struck him what Igneel had tried to tell him last night through his dream. He couldn't dwell in his grief anymore – it was time to set forth. Igneel had just shown him the way, a path to follow in life from now, and it was her.
The important thing was her.
A frigid wind blew through the forest as Erza pulled her sword from the dying wolf, the steel glistening in a scarlet fluid. The animal whimpered as it collapsed to the ground, waiting for her to deliver a final blow. Erza looked it into its yellow, old eyes as she raised her sword again and struck it through the wolf's skull.
"I'm sorry", the Companion muttered as she cleaned the bloodied blade by wiping it in the snow. "It was a good fight."
Erza sheathed her blade as she spent a silent moment at the wolf's carcass, honouring the life she just took. Her heart pounded rapidly in her chest – while it hadn't been a close call, ice wolves were always tough. They were twice as large as regular wolves and twice as ferocious. The wolf had attacked her on the road, and twilight had fallen while they had fought.
But she had won, her steel not betraying her this time.
She took a deep breath, filling her lungs with fresh, chilly air to calm her rushing blood before continuing her journey. Raising her eyes from the wolf, she measured how far she had strayed from the road. Her footsteps on the snow intertwined with the wolf's, crimson splatters adorning the white shimmering surface.
Perhaps this calm moment after a fierce battle was the profound reason she joined the Companions years ago. The satisfaction pushed her through triumph and defeat, victories feeling like standing on top of a mountain with arms spread as wide as the sky itself.
After facing a dragon, she thought she'd never feel like that again.
She revelled in the feeling for a while. More wolves howled in the distance, and as Erza's thrill started to wear off, she doubted she could take on a whole pack of wolves now. With exhausted steps, she left the forest and found back to the moonlit road.
Erza had dropped her bag behind the rocks on the pavement. Even though her tent could be folded to fit into a small place, she had needed her full agility against that wolf. She found her belongings where she had left them, picked them up and looked up, gaze focusing on the building on the dim horizon. It was the Nightgate Inn, her next destination. Looking forward to a warm meal and a warm bed, she set forth.
Exhaustion began to grow in her legs, calves burning as she walked. She had spent the last night in her tent, alone and mostly awake. Despite not wanting to admit it, she missed the brats, Natsu and Lucy. She seldom accompanied with mages, but spending a week with them had been a nice change, eye-opening almost. There was so much more in this world than ice-cold steel she had always trusted.
Thanks to her hungry haste, Erza reached the inn fast. She kicked the stairs to shake the snow off her boots before she entered, not bothering to knock. A scent of fresh, spicy stew filled her lungs with warmth as she stepped in. She sighed and let her tense muscles relax.
The inn was surprisingly full, with about ten travellers gathering at the tables. The lively chatter turned into merry singing and shouting at the same rate as the mead bottles emptied. Erza crossed the hall and bought herself a room for a night. The innkeeper showed her into her room, but she didn't stay for long. She placed her heavy bag into a chest and then she went to order herself a full bowl of stew with a large stein of ale.
She dined in silence, sudden melancholy growing inside her armoured heart. The noise around her felt pointless in the absence of friendly voices. Despite the constant drunken brawls she despised, she couldn't wait to be back in Jorrvaskr. The best part of adventures was coming home. Nothing in the world could beat that.
Or, maybe one thing would…
When she finished eating, she decided to head back outside. The singing and dancing got on her nerves – she would get enough of that when she'd reach Whiterun. She left the bowl on the table as she rose and walked to the door, stepping back into the fresh night air and embracing the silence.
Stars glimmered against the black velvet of the sky. Erza didn't stay at the front door, instead of circling behind the building to view the scenery opening from the hill. She followed a pathway trodded in the snow, which led her to a small pond near the inn. A dock was built on the shore, possibly serving as a swimming or washing place during summer. She walked to the end of the wooden dock and peeked into the water. The currents had kept it from freezing yet.
Sudden lights appeared on the sky as she stood there, the colourful waves of magical energy dancing against the blackest night. She exhaled, the sense of time fading around her as she adored the beauty of the world.
By her habit, Erza gazed around trying to glimpse Jellal's owl. She hadn't contacted him yet, deciding to wait 'til her thoughts would've cleared. Shame silenced her. Jellal was the only person Erza could be weak with, but she didn't want to admit how miserably she had failed. How she wasn't as strong as she let the others know – as she let herself know.
"Erza?" said a sudden voice behind her, making her flinch. Recognising the voice, she turned around. A man stood where the dock began, a man Erza knew.
Speak of the devil.
"Jellal!" Erza squealed and raised her hand above her mouth, realising she had been too loud. "What are you doing here?"
They weren't supposed to meet here, not now, but it seemed sometimes their paths crossed by happenstance. As if they were drawn together, like a moth drawn to a flame. But which one of them was the flame and which one the moth, Erza couldn't tell, even after knowing him for her entire life.
The man stretched his arms, pulling an elbow close to his chest. "Just dumped a body in the pond."
Erza frowned, letting her gaze fall into the dark water beneath her. She had been standing there for a quarter of an hour at least and hadn't heard or seen anything. Not a splash on the pond's surface, not scrunching of snow, not even a flash of a shadow.
"Should I ask the same from you?" Jellal asked as he walked to her.
Erza raised her eyes to him. He stood tall in front of her, his face veiled in the darkness of his hood. Gently, he pulled it back and revealed a smile Erza had missed for so long.
Right then the blood in his hands didn't matter at all.
Erza clung to Jellal's neck, wrapping her arms around his slender build. She pressed her face into his chest, smelling blood in his pitch-black robes. Pushing it aside, she closed her eyes and muttered, "I missed you."
Jellal chuckled, softly patting her on the back. "Did something happen?"
"A dragon", she whispered, the terror still alive in the tone of her voice. "There was a dragon in Kynesgrove."
"Really?"
Erza swallowed past a lump forming in her throat. She knew Jellal wouldn't judge her for it. He was aware of her fear of the dragons, had always been.
"I was so scared. Seeing it rise from its grave just…" she whispered and paused for a breath. "I'm a coward, Jellal. I couldn't fight. I left the brats alone against it, the little mages, they were braver than me. And Lucy, she –"
"Wait a moment", Jellal interrupted, putting a gloved finger on her lips. It smelled of blood. "I'm not holding up. The dragon rose from the dead? You witnessed it?"
"Yes", she started. "Another dragon woke it up. A big one, as black as night."
Jellal silenced for a moment, processing what she told.
"I think we have much more to talk about", he said then. "But the dragons can wait for a while."
With careful, delicate hands Jellal lifted Erza's chin and bent down to press his lips on hers. Erza surrendered into the kiss, tasting arousal on his tongue. She knew killing made his blood flow, the rush of murder flaming up his passion.
He grasped the back of her head, pulling her ever closer to him. With his strong fingers among her hair, Erza couldn't help but think whose life those same hands had taken this time. Had it been a man or a woman? Young or old? She would never know.
"Mind if I'd warm your bed tonight, Scarlet?" he asked, snapping Erza out of her thoughts.
"In an inn full of people?" she answered, shocked. "Are you out of your mind?"
"Killing all the witnesses would solve such a minor problem."
Erza shook her head, hiding a smile into the shadows. "That's the stupidest idea ever. Of course not. Not here, at least…"
Jellal smirked as he pulled away from their embrace. Though he never said it aloud, Erza knew the distance between them was tearing him apart as well. Just as she hoped he wouldn't have chosen to become an assassin, Jellal hoped she wouldn't be a Companion. They would never ask each other to give up their choices, but it didn't make their shared wish of living together go away.
"Have you ever thought…" Erza started silently, swallowing her words in hesitation. She didn't want to say it, but now she was too desperate for his comfort. There had to be a solution for the... conflict of their lifestyles. The thought had ripened in Erza's mind since the mage had first said it days ago, and now she couldn't refuse to pick that up.
"Thought about what?"
She bit her lip as she pressed her face against his chest again. "Creating a disguise."
"A disguise?" Jellal wondered, his sharp brows pinching together.
Erza began to regret bringing it up, but his reaction hadn't been an utter rejection either. He appeared curious. Cautious, but curious.
"Yes", she assured. "You could have another name, another background, another… occupation."
Jellal chuckled and caressed her cheek. "Who could I be if I wasn't me?"
"A scholar from Cyrodiil investigating the dragon attacks", Erza answered and leaned to his hand. "Whiterun's court wizard accepts all help he can get. No one would waste time figuring out your true background."
"All that just so we could have –"
"Not just that", she said, blushing. "We could… We could see each other without worrying so much. We could be together."
Jellal went silent for a while. He gazed at her, his dark eyes a void of all emotion. Erza knew he still felt, though. He felt a lot, but his cold-hearted demeanour hid it perfectly.
"It's risky", he mumbled then.
"Not as risky as what you just suggested. And anyone who knows your face is dead anyway."
"Where'd you get such an idea after all these years, my dear?" Jellal asked, the smile on his face suddenly decaying. He stared straight into her eyes, freezing Erza's blood.
"From whom did you get such an idea?"
A/N: And here's the second part of the chapter!
The calmer chapters are now behind and there will be more action in the upcoming chapters. Just when things are looking a bit brighter for Natsu, I've arranged something exciting for him...
Thanks for all the love and support!
