This chapter was like, 90% done a couple days ago, but for some reason I can only get my foot on the gas on the nights before I have shifts at work that start at 6 AM. I can already feel the coffee I'll be drinking in a couple hours.

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1. MetalRasenganBijuuLord: Yeah, the idea was to provide a power with a limitation, something that will come to serve as a cornerstone of Naruto's capabilities; it's completely and utterly reliable, it will activate whether or not he wants it to, but that's not always a good thing. While WTSIG Naruto's power ran rampant and mostly unchecked, until the back half of the story when other people actually started pushing his limits...the Oathkeeper is bound, quite literally, by his words. It'll come back to bite him in his face. It's like a way of enforcing canon Naruto's own nindo: "I never go back on my word."

Because he can't.

Let's get this trainwreck moving.


"Glad to see you made it, Naruto." Iruka said, a sly grin on his face as he looked out over the classroom. "I was about to do the attendance. Wouldn't bode very well for you to be late for your first day as a shinobi!"

"Thanks." The blond said, red eyes sweeping across the gathered students.

He took his customary seat next to Uchiha Sasuke. It wasn't because he held an outstanding friendship with the younger teen, and he certainly wasn't being made to sit there, but the day felt too quiet. His small sacrifice, not being able to sit by himself, was as philanthropic as he could get; he was saving himself, and the rest of the class, just as much as Sasuke. As though on cue, the twin terrors named Ino and Sakura scrambled through the door, with their high-pitched voices and their schoolyard insults.

Naruto was thankful that Ayame hadn't turned out that way; maybe it was because she'd been second-in-command of their motley crew, but the other girls had all ducked their heads rather than deal with fighting her. It had always been refreshing to leave the childish power struggles of his fellow students behind, and he relished the thought of not having to interact with them again.

"Naruto."

"Sasuke."

The two greeted one another just like they had for years, without words getting in the way. Sasuke had always been slightly edged out from the top spot in sparring contests, owed in part to the fact that he was simply smaller-framed and lighter than Naruto; the two-year gap, from thirteen to fifteen, meant more now than it had in the past. It also meant more than it would in the future. Still...those were practice bouts, and from today onward, they were comrades serving Konoha.

"Is that everyone?" Iruka asked, looking over the attendance sheet and doing a headcount of the students who'd sat down. "Yeah, that's everyone. Congratulations, all of you! To make the teams weighted fairly, we tried to mix your three-man groups into average grades. That way, it doesn't feel like one team is getting a load of talent, while the others suffer. Under Kurenai Yuuhi: Aburame Shino, Haruno Sakura, and Inuzuka Kiba."

Naruto zoned out for a moment. While he heard Shikamaru, Ino, and Chouji's names called on a team together, he missed the name of their sensei. Several more names were rattled off, one after another, but just as Naruto allowed himself to relax into his chair, he nearly jerked back to the edge of his seat upon having his name called.

"Under Hatake Kakashi: Ne Sai, Uchiha Sasuke, Uzumaki Naruto."

Naruto looked to his left, and nodded at Sasuke. Sai sat at the very back of the class, almost more interested in people-watching than his studies. The orphan had run with Naruto, under his command, for the last seven years. Though his grades in the classroom had been mediocre, he was as fast as Sasuke, and physically just as capable of giving Naruto a serious challenge. As he thought about the team assignments, he realized they weren't random.

Kiba and Shino were two-thirds of a sensor team, but without a Byakugan or Sharingan, they weren't quite complete. Were they banking on Sakura being a sensor-type ninja? Or else, her high grades were equated with more intelligence, and she was meant to be their strategist. On the other side, the Ino-Shika-Chou trio was about as close to a three-piece suit allegory as humans could come. They were designed to cover for one another, and additionally filled the role of a scouting team. Meanwhile, the Uchiha's Sharingan and Sai's physical prowess, combined with Naruto's heritage and past, their purpose became clear: they were a heavy assault team, the kind that would be deployed to swing battles in Konoha's favor.

Then, of course, there was their sensei: Hatake Kakashi. Naruto had never met the man at length, but knew that he'd been a student under the Yondaime Hokage's command. He was a decorated veteran of the Third War, and a general consensus was that he rested directly beneath the Sannin on a scale of power.

That was weighted heavily in favor of Naruto's thoughts, and the three boys were the last ones left in no time; Sasuke and Sai were both composed, even if they were showing tics of impatience, but Naruto knew the game being played. He couldn't see Kakashi, and couldn't sense him either, but he'd patiently waited on marks for hours at a time before making his move to strip them of whatever he'd been intent on. Eventually, it would come down to who Kakashi thought the weak link was.

"Where is he?" Sasuke asked. "Some Jounin-sensei. Can't be bothered to meet his students?"

"I'm sure he has a reason." Sai said, looking straight at Naruto as he did. He knew.

There was a certain psychological victimization in knowing that they were being hunted. It was alleviated, a little bit, by the understanding that they wouldn't be killed...but Naruto didn't really know his teacher, and it was bad to make assumptions. So he sat, stone-faced and silent, as he waited for the day to run its course.

"Sorry for the wait." A voice came from the door as it finally swung open again. "First an old lady needed help with her groceries, then a black cat crossed my path and I had to take Broad Street instead of Main Street, and then I almost walked under a ladder and I had to turn around the other way. Lucky for me, too, because right after that someone tossed a piano out of their window. Would've hit me square in the head, could you imagine?"

"Vividly." Naruto replied, and Kakashi raised his singular visible eyebrow in response; the Jounin's nose and jaw were covered by a microfiber mask that prevented his lips from being read, and beneath his angled hair, the standard hitai-ate draped across his face to cover his left eye.

"I tell you what, come meet me on the roof and we'll introduce ourselves." Kakashi said before vanishing with a puff of smoke.

Sasuke sprung up in anger, swift strides launching him out the door and towards the stairs.

"Wall climbing?" Naruto asked.

"Wall climbing." Sai agreed.

Naruto slid the window open, chakra reaching out from the pores of his hands as he used it to anchor himself to the side of the building. This was an exercise to improve chakra control, something Mizuki had taught him after he'd passed his fourth-year midterm. Remembering the silver-haired Chunin brought a fair share of pain to Naruto's heart, but he didn't regret what he'd done the night before. Chakra poured out of Naruto's feet, and he dashed up the side of the academy like a hunted jackalope. Turning to look down, he saw Sai calmly striding up the side of the building, parallel to the ground. Content with his friend's success, he shot up to the rooftop, and landed in a crouch.

"Hey." Kakashi said, a two-fingered salute coming up to his hitai-ate before he lowered it. "Glad to see you made it."

Moments later, Sai came into view, one step taking him from the side of the building to the rooftop, and the white-skinned boy nodded at his teacher-to-be.

"Where's the other one?" Kakashi asked, moments before Sasuke came into view. "Oh, there you are."

Naruto leaned against a post that held the roof's awning up, his bloodshot eyes focused on Kakashi as he waited for whatever came next.

"So, how about we introduce ourselves? We can, uh, do it like this: tell me your name, some of your likes, some of your dislikes, and your goal or dream. How about it?"

"Isn't it according to social convention to introduce yourself first?" Sai asked, and Kakashi shrugged.

"Fair enough. My name is Hakate Kakashi. I like a lot of things, and I dislike a lot more things. My goal is to have so much sex with so many women that when I finally die, every brothel across the entirety of the elemental nations is closed because every whore on earth is busy mourning my death."

"I'm sorry he asked." Sasuke grumbled, but Sai remained passive. On the other side of them, Naruto nodded sagely.

"An incredibly noble pursuit." The blond said. "But you'll need to chase that dream to make it happen."

"Thank you. Now, since you were the first one up here...early bird gets the worm. Tell me about yourself."

"My name is Naruto. I like food, money, training, and fighting. I dislike loudmouths, people who take their situations for granted, people who can't keep their promises, and organized religion. My goal is to keep finding more challenging opponents to beat."

"Next." Kakashi said, nodding to Sai.

"You can call me Sai. I don't particularly like or dislike anything. My goal is to serve Konoha however I can."

Kakashi's lone visible eye darted to look at Naruto in questioning, and all the blond could do was shrug.

"Last to arrive, last to talk."

"My name is Uchiha Sasuke. I like my family and getting stronger, and I dislike anybody who gets in my way. My goal is to avenge my clan."

"Well, now that we've introduced ourselves, let me tell you what I see." Kakashi said, disinterested. "A broody emo wrapped up in his own power trip, a professionally mediocre societal reject, and a high-security convict in the making. Meet me at Training Ground Seven tomorrow morning at nine for the second half of your graduation test. A word of advice, though? Don't eat breakfast, you'll just puke it back up."

Kakashi vanished in another puff of smoke, leaving the three Genin by themselves.

"Well. That happened." Sai said.

"Can he really fail us after we already passed the academy tests?" Sasuke asked.

Naruto stayed silent, watching over the village and straining his focus in an attempt to keep himself in check. Without warning, he launched into a jump, performing an aerial shunshin to land in a crouch on a rooftop. Dashing across Konoha's skyline on all fours, he ran, and a growling groan tore its way from his throat.

He had a promise to make good on.


"He's just going to make us wait again." Sasuke said.

"Probably." Naruto agreed.

"Why?" Sai asked. "The only person whose time he's wasting is his own."

"If we're mad at him, we won't be able to concentrate on whatever it is that he's going to throw at us."

"I don't understand. Why would he throw things at us?"

"No, Sai." Naruto said, and Sasuke face-palmed himself.

"Oh, I understand. It was a euphemism."

"Yes." Naruto and Sasuke gave the affirmation simultaneously.

Training Ground Seven was coated with lush grass at its opening, but dense forestry took over after a few paces behind the memorial stones. The carved rocks, made immutable afterwards with techniques Naruto didn't know, had the names of the deceased ninja from each war after the founding of the village. There was another for the victims of the Kyuubi attack, and a fifth that contained the names of those who'd died in the line of duty. Naruto sat down in front of the names of those killed on the night he was born, and he read to himself.

Uzumaki Kushina. His mother. The name brought grief, and longing, to his heart. Why? He'd never known her. He'd never cared about the fact that he was alone in the world, choosing instead to accept his circumstances and improve them. Even so, deep in his core, there was a distinct familiarity with her.

Namikaze Minato. His father. He read that name, picturing the man's face in his mind, and he lost himself for a moment in memories that weren't his own.

The village, burning down around him. Out of control, beyond the point of return, unable to save himself. Helplessness, under the ruthless oppression of another. Hate. So much hate. He opened his mouth, spitting brimstone bile with the hellish flames he'd been born commanding. Surely, if anyone could redeem him, it was Minato. Mate of his host. On the ground, unmoving, their child. Dead. Sorrow crept through him as he continued to attack, crying out in pain. With a final flash of yellow light, and a swirling orb of malevolent power grinding into his flesh, he was redeemed. But the child, the child...

A hand on Naruto's shoulder snapped him from his reverie, and Naruto looked up to see Kakashi staring down at him.

"I miss them too." The Jounin said. "I wonder what they'd say, if they could see you now?"

"They wouldn't need to say anything." Naruto said, iron in his voice as he stood up. "Let's get this show on the road."

That vision bothered him. Where had it come from? What did it mean? He tried pushing it to the back of his mind, but it was impossible to keep from coming back.

"Alright. Since we're all here now, I'll explain the rules of this test. I have two bells," Kakashi raised the small ball-bells up, "and three students. No matter what, at least one of you is going to fail. To pass the test, you need to be able to take a bell from me before the timer is up. You have three hours, starting...now."

Sasuke and Sai sprang away, lunging for the cover of the forest, but Naruto stayed where he was.

"Not going to hide and wait for an ambush?" Kakashi asked.

"What good would it do? These odds are so far in your favor that it's not even funny." Naruto replied. "...wait a second."

"Oh?" Kakashi said, and despite the fact that he couldn't see it, Naruto was utterly certain the silver-haired Jounin was smirking.

"Tajuu Kage Bunshin no Jutsu." Naruto crossed two half-Ram seals in front of his chest, and a thousand copies of the blond had suddenly appeared in the clearing. "If I can't beat you on my own, then I'll just beat you by myself!"

"That sentence may be grammatically correct, but your logic is a little twisted. Why are you trying to do the work of a whole team?"

Naruto vanished in a shunshin, disappearing into the forest as his clones were made into fodder. While the copies of Naruto were far from the original's durability, Kakashi was genuinely impressed; the Kage Bunshin split the user's chakra into equal pieces, dividing them up between the clone and its progenitor. To have enough that he could call upon a thousand, at will, and still have enough energy that he moved without exertion?

Kakashi sighed inwardly, mentally noting to avoid turning any other remnants of the Uzumaki clan into his enemies. Things like this had been why they were feared enough to be massacred in the most casualty-stricken battle in the history of the hidden villages. Maybe Naruto's hair was all he'd gotten from his father?


"Sai!" Naruto hissed, getting the attention of his teammate. "I've figured it out."

"It's a trap. There's no way we can beat him." The black-haired boy said.

"Yeah. Which means either he has no intention of passing us, or he's...forcing us to work together. Damn, we really couldn't see that coming?"

"Apparently not. Should we get Sasuke as well?" Sai asked.

Naruto paused to think about it. He was no great friend of the Uchiha, as an individual or a clan, but he respected that Sasuke had a goal he was driven by; something to earn, something that couldn't be taken away.

"Yeah." Naruto affirmed. "Can you ping him down?"

The sun still hadn't finished rising. They had the time. Sai scribbled down on his chakra-conductive scroll, something central to his techniques and the most important thing he'd ever stolen in his time under Naruto's command as the Banchou. A black snake shot off of the page, racing as it looked to find Sasuke's chakra signature. Minutes later, it returned, and the two teens followed it as it slithered towards their query.

"Sasuke!" Naruto said, once the Uchiha was in sight.

"You look a little worse for wear." Sai observed.

"Tried to fight him one-on-one and lost. If you hadn't found me, I'd have gone looking for you." Sasuke said. "So, either of you have a plan?"

"Coordinated assault." Naruto said.

"Trapper-hunter-killer?" Sasuke asked.

It was the traditional team strategy of smaller units on the battlefield, where one person would lay down Genjutsu or physical traps while another would hound the enemy into position to trigger them. The third teammate would finish the enemy off; in war-zones, the fourth teammate was usually a medic, which meant the bulk of the fighting typically fell on three people.

Naruto shook his head at the question, though.

"No traps." He said. "We have to assume he won't fall for them, considering this is his chosen terrain and we don't have the time. You two aren't as durable as I am, so I'm going to fight him one on one, but you two need to take whatever openings I give you to join in and steal a bell."

"You're going to make yourself fail?" Sasuke asked.

"No. I'm going to make sure you pass." Naruto grinned.

"If Naruto and I are correct, then the test is designed to split us up and make us fail individually, so that we work as a team to accomplish our objective. So it doesn't matter if we succeed or fail."

"That's...pretty clever." Sasuke said.

"It is." Sai agreed. "Wouldn't you say so, Naru-"

Both of the black-haired boys looked to the spot that Naruto had been in moments ago, realizing too late that he'd walked back to the center of the training field to fight Kakashi.

"Geez. Couldn't he have done a count-down for us, or something?"

"Not how he works." Sai shook his head. "When he leads, he expects you to follow."

Sasuke huffed in irritation, but turned with Sai to watch as Kakashi stood up. He was brazenly reading the latest of the Icha Icha novels, its bright orange cover a dead giveaway, but Naruto was a little miffed at that.

"You're not even going to pretend to take me seriously?" He asked.

"What? Oh, no, it's not that. I just got to a really good part. You can still come at me, though, I have a hand free. Your trick with the clones was nice, but unless you have something a little more intense up your sleeve, then all I'm going to get out of this is some light exercise. Whenever you're ready..."

Naruto sighed. Unfortunately, Kakashi's lackadaisical attitude about this was warranted; a Genin, fresh from the academy, taking on a seasoned Jounin who'd been trained under the Yondaime Hokage and served as the man's personal guard? Naruto loved to bet on the underdog, but not even he would have put money on himself.

"So be it." He said, bridging his hands to crack his knuckles. After a countdown that nobody heard, he ducked low and dashed forward.