She doesn't love Elijah. Not like the way Alaric looks at Jenna when her back is turned, with fondness in his eyes. It's just that they weren't supposed to last. The nights drinking wine and talking were supposed to be forgotten, memories that were going to fade, the meaning lost and forgotten as she aged. Now that means something, they'll always mean something. Elijah's family says the phrase "always and forever", Elena's heard it a few times. Always is so certain and forever is a long time, Elena's not sure she could say that to him.

"Heading to bed soon?" Jenna asks, Elena's been writing in her diary and drinking tea since she got home.

"Not sure. I don't really feel tired," Elena admits and Jenna nods and heads upstairs.

Elena begins to wrap up her entry and turn off the lights, she should get on the group chat with Bonnie and Caroline that she's barely used since she's come back to Mystic Falls. She might see if Elijah's still up and if he wants to talk at all. Elena texts Elijah first and then checks the group chat and sends a few messages. They probably won't see them until morning, but her phone beeps at her. Elijah texted back and so did Bonnie.

Bonnie wants to know more about the mysterious soulmate Elena has and Elijah is asking if she's okay.

She responds and waits, a little too awake from the coffee to not stay up a littler longer. Elijah tells her he has a plan for the next day, and Elena wonders what he's thinking of. He did have a night planned that they canceled to binge watch.

Have you found your soulmate yet? Elena asks Bonnie.

No. I can't wait. It's going to be magical. Bonnie replies and Elena bites her lip as she types a response. She deletes the response before she sends it, Bonnie doesn't really know that the supernatural exists. Or if she does-she's never told Elena. She can't tell Bonnie soulmates aren't all they're cracked up to be because she barely knows hers. It's not fair to say that because she rejected Elijah in the beginning. She promised Elijah a real chance, and maybe she just needs some sleep.

She wonders how many people have kept secrets from her over the years. Elijah seems like he's full of secrets and hidden emotions. As she yawns, she thinks that at least Elijah can't lie to her, for better or worse. Elena doesn't know why she's so comforted by it as her head hits her pillow.